A/N: Ola everyone, it's "J"!
Sorry about the long wait. Heheh, what can I say it was finals week! ^^" Well you guys this is a very important post. It's my very first actual chapter that I wrote all by myself. YAY FOR ME! XDDD Overall, I hope you all enjoy this chapter and that it hopefully meets all of your expectations. */ v /* Love you all, peace!
"T": Actually today is the first time I saw this chapter. If you don't support Spamano, I apologize for the upcoming smidgen. Also, relevant to our future chapters, do you awesome, lovable readers have any recommendations to name Thailand, Macau, and Romania? Thank you for reading.
Song list:
Gives you hell
Smile
When you were young
Somebody that I use to know
So what
The rain storm, which had been going on and off throughout the rest of the night of the ball, had finally stopped a few hours before dawn. The dark clouds parted and the shining sun shone brilliantly in the morning sky as it began its trek across the earth. Fresh dew covered the earth like a delicate blanket, and the Morning Glorys in the gardens below spun and twisted themselves as they awoke to greet the rising sun. The nocturnal creatures, whom, up until recently, been prowling the night, found their home in the darkness of the forest or the roots in the earth;the early song birds raised their heads and began to spread their wings. They sang the ancient morning songs in honor of the new day. The earth was still.
Its creatures, both domestic and wild, began to slowly turn and wake, preparing for the day that was to come. All was calm, all was tranquil, and all was perfect. It was an exceptionally beautiful sunrise. Kiku Honda was standing on top of the tallest tower of the castle, watching the whole procession of nature's sweet awakening. It was always a type of tradition for him to watch the sunrise; even when he was at the Jade Palace, he had done it. Perhaps it was because of his ancient family roots and their deep connection to the earth. He stared happily at the sky and continued to do so until finally the landscapers and ground keepers of the castle stepped out to the green, wet lawns.
"Well, all great things must come to end as they say." he said to himself as he hopped off of the tower and headed towards to the oak door of the tower.
As he walked down the lengthy stairs, he went through an internal list of the exercises he would have to do this morning. "There is much that needs to be done." he said once again to himself as he reached the bottom of the stairs. "I might as well do the first things first."
Kiku then quickly found a maid and asked her to have one of the princess's personal servants to wake her immediately. "But Sir Honda, it is not even six yet! The princess usually does not wake until nine."
"Wake her anyways, please. She made me promise to her that I would train her today." The maid looked shocked.
"Are you sure, Sir?"
"Oh, yes. Quite positive. Can you please have someone wake her now?" he asked politely. "You see, if you do not wake her now, then the sun would have traveled too high, and the day would become too hot to train properly."
"Right… I'll see to it right away Sir Honda."
Despite her inner conflict to call for Miss Edelstein to confront him about this worrisome development, she will let it slide for now.
"Thank you."
Kiku offered the young maid a sweet, grateful smile; she returned it with a bow. Kiku then proceeded to head out towards the training area, all the while, thinking about how exactly to go about training the princess.
Kiku sighed as he said, "It is not going to be easy. He probably doesn't even know the elementary basics of self defense."
Of course a mere peasant boy would know how to parry, Kiku thought sarcastically.
Kiku began to question his resolve to train the princess. He knew that Alfred needed some training so that he would be able to protect himself if a situation would ever arose where he was in mortal danger, but he had his self-doubts as a teacher. To tell you the truth, he never had a student before. Sure, he had given a few pointers and advised a few of Arthur's personal guards about how to better their skills, but that was just good fellowship, not one-on-one teaching.
Can I really do this? I mean I am a great warrior after all, but I have never had a student before. Everything that I had ever learned was from big broth- He paused in his thoughts, shaking away the memories of his once beloved big brother. I know I wouldn't be as good as he was, and I don't want to fail Alfred as a teacher either.
Kiku sighed once again and lowered his head in hopelessness. He will screw this one way or the other.
He then looked up at the heavens once more, admiring the now yellow and red colors that streaked across the morning sky. A slight cold breeze blew past Kiku, blowing his raven black hair into the wind, and all at once he felt at peace again. It was all the encouragement that Kiku Honda needed.
He yelled to the sky to rev himself up, "But that wouldn't matter. I will make a man out of him yet! He will be a might warrior to be bargained with."
"What? Why do I have to wake his ass up?"
"Because Lovi, I need to go downstairs to the kitchen to make him his breakfast before he leaves."
"I-I can make breakfast, too ya know!" said a blushing Lovino. "And don't call me that!"
"Aw, Lovi you'e red like a tomato~ So cute!"
"Sh-shut up bastard!"
The once cooing man was cradling his stomach after suffering a violent head-butt to his navel.
"Ouch!"
"Take that you tomato-eating bastard!" Lovino was now fuming with pure irritation. I can cook too! Why do I have to always be the one doing the simple chores around here! He does too much for his own good! His internal argument was then interrupted by a pair of warm, gentle arms wrapping themselves around his waist. "Please Lovi, do this for me?"
Antonio, being from a race whose people were known for their great passion, was a professional at comforting loved ones; not to mention that he was also a professional at wooing his young lover-Lovino. He whispered gentle and kind words into his ear. "Don't be so upset Lovi. Please do this for me…as a favor?"
The blushing Lovino scoffed and rolled his eyes, in an attempt to ignore Antonio's sexy, begging voice, but he couldn't resist the temptation. "What's in it for me than, huh?"
"Oh I can think of a couple of things…" Antonio tightened his hold, playfully squeezing his lover's hips. He then placed a soft kiss on Lovino's warm neck. Lovino twitched at the sudden contact.
"H-hey, you're playing dirty!" protested Lovino as he tried to escape from Antonio's hold.
"Isn't that the idea?" said Antonio. His straight face was unnerving. He then traced the curve of Lovino's neck with his tongue in a playful gesture. That was it, the final straw; embarrassment overload.
"CHI-CHIGI!" Lovino head-butted Antonio once again and pushed him away hard. "Okay, okay I get it! I'll wake the lazy bum up!"
Lovino hurried up the stairs as quickly as he could. But it was too late, Antonio had already seen the unmistakable bright, red blush on Lovino's face, his front curl re-shaped itself to form a heart-like shape at the end.
Clutching and rubbing his sore cheek, Antonio gave a sigh as he look at his retreating lover. He laughed to himself as he saw him turn and disappear from his view. Apparently, his playful banter did just the trick to get his Lovi motivated.
"He's so difficult sometimes…but I don't mind. He's cute that way."
Thinking of Alfred, he sighed about Alfred's request. While he was thinking of distracting thoughts, Lovino ran through the narrow hallway, which were heavily infested with servants. The narrow hallways ran throughout both the interior and exterior of the castle like an elaborate maze of secret tunnels; they were very useful and surprisingly very easily to follow despite its complex structure. If you had a bad sense of direction, then just follow the masses of people heading in one direction. They usually go to the right path.
"Damn him! W-why does he have to be so s-stupid!"
Lovino's red blush intensified as he thought about the kind of things that he was going to make Antonio do to make up for him to get up insanely early to wake up Alfred. "Next time…I am definitely gonna top his fucking ass!"
Lovino finally arrived at the door to Alfred's bedroom. He was so flustered and upset that he didn't even bother knocking on the door; instead, he busted inside the room by kicking down the door.
"OKAY, YA ROYAL PAIN IN THE ASS, TIME TO WAKE THE FUCK UP!" roared Lovino.
The inside of the room was pitch-black dark and Lovino couldn't see a thing. "What the hell?" Apparently the thick drapes which hung over the large windows, completely blocked out the newly rising sun in the east.
"Pfft! Trying to sleep in…the lazy bastard!" Lovino walked over to the windows and pulled them back. The sun's rays crept into Alfred bedroom, which allowed Lovino to finally see his surroundings.
The room Alfred slept in, which Arthur had decided recently that they would sleep in different beds and different rooms due to his nightly visitors (including the fact that their rooms are RIGHT next to each other), was beautifully decorated with different shades of green and gold, which radiated an almost godly glow throughout the whole room. If Lovino hadn't been so upset, then he probably would have stopped to stare at the new room Alfred was assigned to, but there was no time to admire the craftsmanship of the interior designers who had personally designed the room for their princess. A sleeping lump of flesh needs to be awakened.
Lovino walked briskly towards the bed and went to the side where Alfred was still sound asleep. When Lovino saw Alfred, he couldn't help but laugh at his face. Alfred's face, although peaceful and serene as an angel's, was contorted in a funny position with the pillow, which made him look like he was trying to eat the fluffy thing. His mouth was ajar and a small pool of drool lay next to his sleeping face. The sight was actually pretty hilarious.
This guy looks like a complete idiot! Lovino laughed to himself. What a doofus!
Lovino's internal comedy show was then interrupted by a soft moaning which later evolved into a sleepy murmur. "Arthur…jerk-face…gonna…pay…for…not….dancing…" Alfred then stretched and rolled over to the other side of the bed.
"Hey, where do you think you're going, Sleeping Ugly?" Lovino nonsensically asked to the sleeping man.
"When you see…my face…hope it gives you…hell…" said Alfred as he positioned himself facing down with his arms outstretched in awkward angles.
"Listen up you," cried Lovino as he arrived on the side where Alfred had stopped. "It's time for you to get your lazy ass out of bed!" he shook Alfred violently and had even smacked him a couple of times, but Alfred stayed sounded asleep.
"When you walk my way…hope it gives you hell...gives…you…hell…" he mumbled in his sleep talk.
"Argh!" yelled Lovino. "Come on, wake up!"
Desperate times, calls for desperate measures. He thought to himself. Time to bring out the big guns!
Lovino then moved to the foot of the bed and grabbed all of the sheets, comforters and blankets. Lovino left out a very satisfying scoff as he yelled "You, young sir, are going to get…UP!" and with the last word to emphasize his seriousness, Lovino tore off all of Alfred's bedding. Alfred jerked in his sleep, noticing apparently even in his sleep, that his source of warmth was gone, but he merely grabbed another pillow in his sleep and covered himself up with that.
W-what? Seriously? This guy…Lovino massaged his forehead in an attempt to relieve the headache that the "princess" was currently giving him. "Okay…that's it. NO MORE MISTER NICE GUY!"
Lovino quickly rushed out of the bedroom and ran through the servant hallways. It was about five minutes before Lovino re-emerged from the knocked down doorway with something behind his back. With a devilish grin he walked slowly towards the still sleeping Alfred.
"He-he-he! You, my dear friend, are going to wake up whether you like it or not!" Lovino then reveled what it was he was hiding behind his back. It was a couple of Cymbals. Lovino began to laugh mischievously as he put the pair of Cymbals close to Alfred's exposed right ear. "Any last words?"
"…hope that it..puts you…through…hell…"
"Mmph, no actually I don't think it will. Now say hello to my little friend."
CLANG!
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
A completely terrified Alfred F. Jones had jumped up, tumbled over one of the oversized fluffy pillows and fell on the floor.
"Now THAT'S what I call a wakeup call!" Lovino laughed so hard that it brought tears to his eyes. "Oh, damn that was fucking hilarious!"
"That was so not funny dude!" cried Alfred as he rubbed his head, which he had unfortunately landed on when he fell off the bed. "So not cool!"
"Well the whole point was to get you up," said Lovino cheerfully, "And that sure as hell worked didn't it?"
Lovino then went on to explain that Kiku was waiting for him at the training area to start his lessons.
"W-what? Why did you say so before? Hurry, let's get me dressed!"
"Yeah, yeah whatever. Hold your horses!"
Lovino set up a few outfits on the bed which was composed of clothing that was perfect for working out, and that would not outline his bodily structure so much so that it would lead someone to the conclusion that this so-called "princess" was actually a guy. Alfred chose one of the outfits, the one that was red, white and blue, and looked at himself excitedly in the mirror. "Whoa, nice call Lovino! You really know your stuff!"
"I'm not called a royal designer for nothing, you know."
"Now that I got the disguise part out of the way, all I need now is some food."
"Did somebody say food?"
Antonio was rolling into Alfred's bedroom with a chart with three shelves. The bottom shelf had different types of juice, milks, syrups and jams. The second was covered with different types of pastries, fruit and bread. Finally the top shelf had his actual meal which was composed of a large plate of eggs scrambled with cheese and ham and a side plate of three different types of bacon and sausage, a small mountain of country potatoes on it, and a large tower of Belgian waffles, French toast and fluffy buttermilk pancakes. And then on the corner of the shelf was a small bowl of cinnamon oatmeal.
"Oh…my…god!" said Alfred and Lovino at the same time.
Antonio laughed and rubbed the back of his head as he said "Sorry, I guess I kinda went overboard, huh? But don't worry. This food is for all of us. After all we all have a big day ahead of us."
The monstrosity full of food looked so yummy and pretty that both Lovino and Alfred had to quickly look away or else a sliver of drool would have began to ooze out of their gaping mouths.
"You know, pretending to be a princess who is married to a ruthless husband does have its ups every now and then." said Alfred happily.
"Antonio…I am seriously loving you right now. You're the best." said Lovino is a dreamy daze.
Antonio laughed. "Aye, que bueno! I'm glad that you both like it. Now come on, let's eat!"
"It's 6:30 right now Alfred, so you better hurry your ass up and eat." said Lovino.
"Dude, no need to tell me twice!" Alfred ran joyfully to Antonio who was already serving their breakfast. "Gimme ten pancakes Antonio and load it up with the sweetest maple syrup you got!"
Arthur had woken up with a start.
CLANG!
With a heart racing, at a beat which Arthur believed at 100 miles per hour, he sprang up from his bed in a perfect mess- with bed head, crusty eyelids and all. In an absolute state of shock Arthur asked "What the bloody hell was that?"
There was a movement of limbs from the covers to his right. A slender, waving hand rose up from the covers and a tired voice answered "Mmmm, don't know. Don't care."
Another equally tired voice said "Just ignore it."
"Go back to sleep with us Arthur." encouraged yet another.
"It's too early to be getting up, even for a king like you, darling." was the sweet reply of another voice.
These were the many responses which came from Arthur's very crowded, king size (no pun intended) bed.
W-wait…What? Arthur looked about his room and found himself to be naked…in bed…with four other women...who were also…naked.
Damn.
How did this happen again? Oh, right he got severely drunk and…Wait, what happened after that? He must have blacked out sometime last night. But that didn't explain the girls. Oh, but wait just a minute. He must have invited the girls upstairs to have a little whine and a moan after he had blacked out. Yes, that's it! Then they more than likely had a wonderful time and fell asleep in the same bed…naked. Indeed, this explanation made perfect sense.
"Hey Arthur, come lay back down with us." said a sleepy voice. Arthur turned his head and saw that it was Alice. "It's cold here without you."
"Sorry love, but it looks like it would be time for you and your lovely young friends to go back to your own rooms."
A brunette whined, "What?" whined
The brown head turned over and Arthur saw that it was Jacqueline. "But why? We had such a good time together."
"There is that," Sakura said as she turned over her side to look down at Arthur, smiling that innocent smile of hers as she cupped her cheeks with her hands. "And the fact that it is cold outside. You need the warmth of your bed Arthur." Her sweet voice quavered as she realized she talked to her king.
"Wouldn't it be better if we could just cuddle together for a little bit?" blankets rolled over as a head poked out from on top of Arthur; it was Christina. "Come on…just for a bit longer?" Christina pressed her body closer to Arthur's, and he could feel her delicate nipples poking pleasurably at his ribs.
Too bad I can't remember a damn thing about last night. Those would have been some sweet memories to look back on when I become a sentimental, old man.
He was beginning to feeling a bit aroused from all the sensual attempts of the ladies to try and keep him in bed. He had to recompose himself.
No good. I have things to do…and these girls are getting in the way. They have to leave now.
"I do sincerely apologize ladies, but I'm afraid this is a decision which is, regrettably, not open for debate or conversation. You will all have to go back to own rooms…now."
Obediently, although very reluctantly, all the four young maids got out of bed, dressed, gathered up their belongings and left Arthur's room.
"Good riddance. It's too bad that I can't remember a damn thing about what happened last night. It had to be fun though." Arthur laughed to himself as he internally offered himself compliments about being a "Sex God" and "A Divine Conqueror" and so on.
He slowly lowered himself back down in his bed and stretched his arms behind his neck. "What can I say…I'm just that good!" he said with a conceded tone. "Heh! Sex God indeed."
Arthur got up and dressed himself. "I think a nice morning walk would be a lovely way to start the day." He opened the door to his bedroom and began his trek out toward the castle grounds. As he walked down his common room which was connected to the built-in kitchen and small library, Arthur heard a very loud and annoying voice say, "Jesus H. Christ, Antonio! The pancakes were flippin' amazing! Like a gift from GOD! Thank you again, my man. See ya!"
Arthur cringed at the sound of the princess's voice.
"Oh goody… She is awake too." groaned Arthur. "What is she doing up so bloody early in the morning, anyways?"
He decided to ignore his wife's sudden outburst and just continued to walk out. It wasn't until he was finally outside that a funny thought entered Arthur's head.
"Hmph…that's funny. I didn't wake up with a hangover this time. Lucky I guess."
"Thank you again for showing me the way through the tunnels, Lovino."
"Shut up you! You're the reason for my loss of beauty sleep!"
"Come on I said I was sorry, didn't I?"
"Fuck off, dipshit!"
Lovino was now currently leading Alfred to the training area to meet up with Kiku. Since it was actually much easier to get there though the use of servant tunnels, Antonio had made the very excellent suggestion to have Lovino take Alfred to the training area through the passageways.
"What? Not again! Are going to have me going up and down all day, you bastard?" cried the unhappy man.
"Aye Lovi, por favor?" pleaded Antonio. "You know the tunnel systems better than I do."
"Bullshit!"
Antonio pouted and began to plead some more in his native tongue, the romance language that has magical abilities of persuasion, and Lovino, however reluctant, soon gave way to his lover's request. Lovino was not an early bird, and he was still very unhappy about his current predicament, hence the awkward and tense atmosphere surrounding the two men.
Feeling that the air around them was way too quiet for his taste, Alfred decided to ask Lovino a question. "H-hey, Lovino?"
"What the hell do you want now bastard?"
"I was just wondering…what were those things that you used to wake me up?"
Lovino turned back towards Alfred, eyeing him suspiciously. "Why do you want to know?"
"Just curious." replied Alfred with an innocent smile.
"They're called Cymbals. They are one of the many musical components that make up a drum set."
"Oh, dude, way cool! You can play the drums?" said Alfred excitedly.
Blushing and flustered, Lovino shakily replied "Y-yeah…of course."
"That's so awesome, Lovino! You're so badass!"
Overly flattered by the compliment, Lovino puffed out his chest with pride. Fuck yeah, he thought.
"Umm, hey Lovino, can I ask you another question?" asked Alfred.
"Certainly!" replied the suddenly cheerful Lovino.
"If I were to…oh, I don't know…give you a piece of music, would you be able to play it?"
"It depends…what is it?"
"Oh, it's just a song I wrote. You see, I asked Antonio to play the guitar bit, which is pretty awesome in itself, but I think it would sound completely epic if you were play your drums with him! The song would be so awesome!" said Alfred in a fast blur of excitement.
"Well, I don't know…I'll have to take a look at the song's music tabs. But…sure, why not, I can play it for you."
"R-really?"
"Yes."
Alfred was absolutely thrilled. His plan to get revenge on Arthur was going to go down epically; it would go down in the history books of Emerald Kingdom for sure. "Ha-ha, you're the best Lovino!" he then embraced the Italian in a tight bear hug.
"H-HEY! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING? GET OFF ME YOU ASSHOLE!" screamed the irritated Italian.
"S-sorry dude, I'm just really happy!" Alfred smiled brightly, which lured the interest of the Lovino once again.
"What exactly is the song about? Why do you want me and Antonio to play it for you? Are you that bored out of you mind that you write music to pass the time?" asked Lovino.
"Well, to tell you the truth," Alfred twiddled his fingers, "It's all part of my plan."
"Plan? Plan for what, pray tell?"
Alfred beckoned Loivno to come closer to whisper in his ear about his secret plan to get revenge on Arthur. Needless to say, Lovino thought it was an excellent idea. Lovino gave a hearty laugh as he said, "That fucking asshole's gonna get what he deserves!"
"Ha! Glad you agree!" replied Alfred. "So…you're in?"
"Definitely!" The two boys clasped her hands in agreement. "I'll learn your song and play my fingers off!"
They continued to walk down the tunnel and it wasn't long before they arrived at the training area. Before leaving Alfred to do his training, Lovino had one more question to ask. "Hey, Alfred, where is this music?"
"Antonio has it!" he shouted back as he ran out toward the opened clearing. "Oh hey, ya know what Lovino, how about you and Antonio take the day off to learn the song! Oh, and get some rest…you totally deserve it Lovino! Thanks again!"
Kiku had the whole exercise session planned out. They would start off with twenty minutes of stretching and meditation, afterwards they would go over the basics of self defense for an hour and a half. Then he would have Alfred practice the blocks and hits by himself for an hour. Then after that, if Kiku believed he was ready, he would spare with Alfred for another hour; followed by a quick cool down exercise and short mediation, to once again relax the muscles. Finally he would give him a quick demonstration on weapons and then maybe have him practice it (if he still got any energy left). Yes, this seems like a perfect routine for his first lesson since Kiku does not know how skillful Alfred really is. Because of the fact that this would be his first actual lesson as a teacher, this easy lesson would be simple enough for Alfred to follow. It was the perfect plan; nobody can ruin this perfectly conducted plan, except for Alfred himself.
Why is he taking so long? thought Kiku. I thought I told them to make sure that the "princess" was to be up and ready to go by 6:30. Why isn't he here? It's already 7:15 and the sun is getting too hot…at this rate I'll have to cut off the weapons part of today's training. Bad student indeed!
Time passed and it wasn't until 7:45 that Kiku finally saw Alfred's far-off figure running towards him. "Sorry I'm late Kiku. Had trouble waking up."
"I see."
Kiku, needless to say, was upset, but it's not like he would actually express his dissatisfaction openly. I mean, never mind the very demoralizing fact that Alfred was an hour and fifteen minutes late! But it's not like it really matters anyways!
"Well then, let us begin your training."
But despite Kiku's disappointment in his student's lack of punctuality, he was pleasantly surprised to find out how well-rounded Alfred was. He was no captain of the guard, of course, but he did have some skill with hand-to-hand combat.
"Despite your gangry and girish figure, you actually have strong muscles and fast refrexes…princess."
"Aww geeze, thanks a lot Honda-sensei." said Alfred with a pouty, sour face.
"Where did you learn how to fight like this?" Kiku asked as he threw Alfred another fist to the head. Alfred quickly blocked it and responded by sending a quick kick Kikuu's left rib cage, but Kiku managed to jump out of the way just in time.
"Well some of it I just learned off the streets. You don't live in the crummy streets of the Lapiz Kingdom without picking up on a few things, ya know what I mean?" Alfred paused in his train of thought as the dark memories of living on the streets began to flood back into his head. He frowned as he remembered the times when he would have to, literally, fight for table scraps.
"Don't get distracted!" warned Kiku. He jumped up and tried to spin kick Alfred's head.
"Whoa!" He blocked it.
"I also learned a few more things at Lapiz castle. Marie was practically like a knight you know. They needed their stunt double to be an exact replica, right? I had to become Marie. So they taught me how to use a sword and stuff like that. But I still prefer to do hand-to-hand combat like this."
"Hmmm, I can tell. Not only are you skilled, but I can tell you have a great passion for it." Punch, block, jump, kick and then block again. Their bodies moved all over the clearing in a violent blur of punches and kicks and slams and jumps. Although a bit sloppy, unbalanced and not having complete control of his swings, Alfred was a pretty good fighter. However, he was lacking something.
"Come on Sensei! Is this really all you got?" teased Alfred. He was sweaty and bit out of breath, unlike his counterpart. "Do not trick yourself into thinking you are the better." replied Kiku.
And with that, Kiku found an opening and hit Alfred dead center in the stomach. "Aagh!" he fell on the dirt and clenched his stomach as he gasped for breathe, but he ended up throwing up a bit instead. His faulty flaw was his overconfidence and his incapability to strategize his attacks. Even though roughhousing in the streets strengthened his senses, all he had to rely on was his muscles and survival, and if Kiku perceived this correctly, this boy never killed anyone. How will Kiku train him by the time an assassin comes?
"Oh, man! You certainly do pack one mighty punch!" rasped Alfred.
"I'm sorry. I guess I went a little bit too far, didn't I?"
Thank goodness the training area had been disclosed from other that morning since he reserved this place until noon especially. The two of them had a lot of work. He was glad when Ludwig said that he wouldn't mind having Kiku personally train the princess in the mornings.
"I'll be able to go on early morning jogs now." was Ludwig's cheery reply. Well, that was what Kiku hoped it was despite Ludwig's stoic face.
"Here, let me help you." Kiku picked up Alfred and he helped him sit down as he left to go get him a drink of water.
As Kiku went for the drink, the only thought that was in his head was: "Why does this seem so familiar?"
This exercise had reminded him too much of his time spent with his brother.
"Here. Drink this, you'll feel better." said Kiku as he handed Alfred a cup of water.
"Thank you." He gulped the water down.
They did the cool down and did a quick meditation before finally calling it a day. It was 11:35 by the time they walked out of the training area.
"Thank you again Kiku, for training me."
"Not a problem. Next time though…don't be late." Kiku stared at him with a hard, stern expression.
Alfred laughed and stretched the back of his head as he said, "Yeah sorry about that. Not an early bird you see. It won't happen again though, I promise."
"If you say so."
As they walked back towards the castle, Kiku gave Alfred a few pointers on how to improve his fighting skills. "Always make sure that your body is in balance…Move your whole body with each punch, rotate your hips next time to create a more powerful punch…don't get distracted by your surroundings, that'll give your opponent an opening…" Kiku rambled on and continued to say more. Alfred stood and listened tentatively, trying to take it in all the information as best as he could.
"Oh my goodness, where have you been princess? And why are you outside? And in those raggedy clothes no less!" came the loud shouting voice of a women who was storming down their way.
It was Elizabeta.
"Princess, where have you been? I have been searching all over for you!"
Alfred had been caught red-handed. He hadn't told Elizabeta about his plan to train with Kiku that morning. You see, Elizabeta had near to almost complete control of Alfred's schedule and daily life at the castle. If it wasn't approved by Elizabeta, then it didn't happen. He had to figure out a way to work his way around this pickle, and fast. With a sweet voice that came with that perfectly matching innocent face, Alfred responded with a "…I was out…and about." he twirled around innocently, trying to come across as little of a kid as possible. Maybe he could hit Elizabeta's maternal soft spot and get away with it.
"I was safe, though. Kiku was with me the whole time, you see. So it's all okay…right?" he blushed.
He knew he was in deep trouble, but hopefully this adorable little display of child-like innocence would be his perfect scapegoat.
"SAFE? SAFE?" cried Elizabeta "I am in charge of your whereabouts and well-being inside the castle. I make schedules for you so that you are well taken care of. If I don't know where you are, then how am I supposed to keep you safe? Not to mention- do you even know the giant amount of trouble we would be in if I had lost you!"
"Calm down Elizabeta. I was with the princess the entire time." calmly stated the cool and collected Kiku Honda. Even though it did take him a few minutes, Kiku was able to calm Elizabeta down enough to where she was no longer yelling at the two. As a friend and as a confident to know Alfred's secret, he must do anything, even lying, to help him.
"Gaah! It doesn't even matter! You missed your morning lessons." sniffed Elizabeta.
"Too bad for you, you'll just have an extra hour of studies today to make up for it." Alfred dutifully listened as Elizabeta scolded him.
It's never fun to get caught thought, Alfred.
"Well then, off you go. You are a little bit late, but you still have to meet with King Arthur for tea. Go on now and take bath; you're a complete mess. Come on now, shoo…shoo!" Elizabeta was practically kicking Alfred as he ran to his room. Kiku lightly chuckled but simultaneously looked worried at the sight.
Alfred rushed to his room, yelling as he hurriedly walked into his bedroom, "Hey Antonio, Lovino! Quick! Get a bath ready for me! The she-witch is on to me!"
He locked the door to explain to Lady Elizabeta that he can take care of himself with Antonio and Lovino and quickly undressed. He wore his robe while shouting very loudly for Lovino to prepare his clothing.
"Lovino, can you get out a new outfit for me, please? Thank you!"
If he wasn't in so much of a hurry, Alfred would have very quickly noticed that he was alone in his room-Antonio and Lovino were nowhere to be seen. Not only that, but he would have noticed that the door to his bathroom had a note taped on it, which read "Sorry for the inconvenience, but I have to use your bath. I will be out as soon as possible."
It was signed by none other than Arthur Kirkland himself. But of course, because he was too distracted and hurried, Alfred had not noticed this at all.
First, the background information that one would need to know about the situation that is about to occur is that Arthur's bath had, oh-so convientaily and rather unfortunately, broken down that morning. Arthur, believing that now more than ever would be the perfect time to execute his marital rights, had decided to use his wife's bathroom while his was being fixed.
Secondly, that early morning walk Arthur had planned to take had eventually turned into an early morning jog. You see, Arthur met Ludwig as he was walking around the grounds, and it was Ludwig who had convinced him to go jogging with him. And although both Arthur and Ludwig enjoyed the exercise, the fast and hard running made both of the boys really tired…and sweaty. Consequently, Arthur was in a desperate need of a bath.
Third, Arthur likes to take long, hot baths.
But of course, when Alfred had opened the door to his bathroom, he did not know this; and so, he had not expected to see a soaking wet, naked Arthur getting out of the bath tub.
So there they were, the two newly married individuals staring awkwardly at each other. Arthur was naked and Alfred was in nothing but a bathrobe. There was a long silence where they only they did were to blink lamely at each other. The silence was finally broken by Alfred.
"Dude, that…" he pointed to Arthur's lower regions "…just totally ruined my day." and then he stepped out.
Arhur, flabbergasted, made an outcry of, "E-excuse me?"
Alfred did not hear him behind the closed door, but the king continued to cry out in dismay.
"How did THIS," he pointed down to his lower body, "GORGEOUS piece of organ RUINED your day?"
After he had clothed himself and was all right and proper, Arthur confronted his wife. "Oi, you with the bratty face!"
Alfred averted his eyes, totally not interested in anything Arthur-related.
"What?" he groaned.
"What was that all about?" he said hot-headedly.
"What do you mean?" Alfred said with an indifferent tone of voice.
"You know, you're acting very nonchalant for just having seen a man's pen-"
Alfred shrugged since he is a MAN himself, "It's really not that big of a deal…"
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S NOT A BIG DEAL? AND HOW COULD YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT ABOUT IT?" yelled Arthur in an embarrassed uproar.
"Ruin your day indeed! Preposterous!" Arthur turned away and crossed his arms similar to how a child would when throwing a tantrum.
This is ridiculous. Does this guy really have that big if an ego? thought Alfred.
"Well, sorry if I don't gawk over it like one of your whores."
Arthur spun around and retorted back with, "SHUT YOUR FILTHY MOUTH!" Hot temper and red-faced, Arthur had the undying urge to do things, but he wouldn't. He hates anybody who slanders his maids' names. He asked them, and they gratefully took him. In his own special way, he cares for them (even though he cares for his fairies and Kiku more), but he calmed himself down. Fighting will do no good.
"Dude, whatever. I gotta take a bath and you're in the way. So if you please…" he pushed past Arthur and walked into his bathroom. "…I'll meet you for tea afterwards, okay? And no messing around while I'm gone, ALRIGHT?"
Arthur scoffed, "No promises there."
"Just keep it in your pants okay?"
Then the "princess" shut the door on her king.
"She's late…again." stated a very bored Arthur. "Why is she never here on time?"
Minutes passed in what Arthur believed to be in the speed of cruising snails. He stared at a clock on the wall aimlessly as he stirred his tea. More time passed until it was finally 2:00 and Arthur had enough of waiting for his so-called wife. "Screw this, I'm off!" he said with a dramatic jump from his armchair. It was right at this moment that his wife decided to arrive. "Sorry I'm late! Please forgive my tardiness!"
Alfred had changed into more a more casual, light dress, which was a soft shade of beige and had a grass green trim. It was, despite the dress' plainness, very beautiful and clean. All, of course, was thanks to both Antonio's and Lovino's hard work.
"You're late." said Arthur with a cold tone. He sipped his cold tea.
"I said I was sorry!"
"Whatever."
They sat back down and drank their tea in silence. But it wasn't long before Alfred's curiosity got the best of him, and he also had a bit of a bone to pick with Arthur-he just had to know.
"So…" began Alfred with an innocent tone, "how were the girls last night?"
Arthur was not prepared for this. He spurted out his tea and chocked at his wife's frank question.
"W-w-what?"
"You heard me, how were they?"
Alfred's smile was obviously fake.
Arthur was awestricken. How could have the princess known about this? She hadn't seen them all together, did she?
"And how exactly did you find out about that, pray tell?"
"Arthur…come on." said Alfred in a "seriously dude?" kind of voice.
"The whole ballroom saw you and your drunken self as you gathered up those maids and boasted about how hard you were going to-"
"Y-you can stop right there!" he quickly raised his hand to emphasize the point. He doesn't want to hear a stranger's point of view of his affairs.
Alfred rolled his eyes in annoyance. How can people tolerate this guy? Oh right, everybody loves the king here while they give evil death daggers to the princess with a golden heart.
"At least thank God for the fact that the majority of the people, who were there at the time, were just people from your court, and not the other kingdoms."
Alfred was staring to get really upset as he remembered just how embarrassed and enraged he was last night at the ball.
"I mean, really Arthur," his voice was turning into a shrill, "Was it NECESSARY TO SAY THAT YOU ARE GOING TO BANG-"
Arthur closed his mouth with a napkin.
Alfred was reaching his tipping point, there would be no turning back after this; he has had his last straw.
However, Arthur wasn't fazed.
"And who are you," Arthur said vehemently in a low voice, "To raise your voice at me?"
"I don't know… I get the point that I'm disgusting and possibly outright revolting to you, which is why we never had sex, much to my relief. BUT MAYBE it's the face that you SNEAK AROUND and did some DIRTY DANCING ON THE BED every time I turn my back on you."
"That is none of your business." He sipped his cold tea again.
"NONE OF MY BUSINESS? I AM YOUR WIFE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!"
"Just because you now have that title, does not mean I have to give a damn about you."
He doesn't have to yell back at a princess who is screaming like a child. Keep calm and carry on.
"You may not give a damn about me, but what about the reputation of the Emerald Kingdom, huh? Don't you care about that shit? Now everyone knows that King Arthur cheats on his wife with other women. Don't you care that the public knows now?"
"I was drunk. I am the king. Many are my subordinates, and they will follow exactly what I say. If I say it didn't happen, then it didn't happen."
Shoot, Arthur was going to run out of tea if he keeps sipping like this.
"My reputation is fine. You shouldn't care about that anyways. All you have to do is to act pretty and nod your head to my ideas." Arthur clapped to finalize this discussion, "Everybody's happy."
Sadly, his "princess" wants to continue.
"Why were you even drunk in the first place? AND WHY DO YOU HAVE SEX WITH RANDOM WOMEN ALL THE TIME? WHAT IF YOU GET AN STD?"
"They are NOT random women."
Here she goes again. Seriously, his wife is disrespecting Alice, Jacqueline, Sakura, and Christina.
"I know them all by name," Arthur plainly replied, "And like I said before, this is none of your business. My sex life has nothing to do with you and your prissy Lapiz-self."
"Honestly, do you ever think of anyone but yourself?"
"I think of you sometimes."
Alfred sarcastically laughed, "Oh really?"
"Yeah, about how much I despise you." He smirked.
Their argument escalated even more. Finally Alfred had enough when Arthur announced that he didn't care what she (but it's really he) thought about and that he was going to invite another maid to his bed tonight.
"ARGH! I CAN'T STAND THIS ANYMORE!"
Alfred stomped off and slammed the door, but he had been in the room long enough to hear Arthur's hurtful words.
"Ha! I could care less about what happens to you! No one needs you, so why don't you just fuck off and leave already?"
Alfred stormed off towards his room, which was thankfully just down the hall, and quickly slammed the door shut. He was pissed…no, BEYOND pissed. He was flippin' enraged! How dare he act like the innocent one! HE was the one who was cheated, HE was the one who waltzed around the ballroom drunk, bragging about his sex life in front of everyone, HE was the one who had random sex in other people's beds with random maids!
ARTHUR WAS ALL TO BLAME; HE WAS THE ONE AT FAULT!
..and yet…
Why was he always the one everyone hated and blamed? Why did the people of Emerald Kingdom love him so, even despite all of these faults and immorality? It just didn't seem fair to Alfred at all. I mean, here he was, poor, little innocent Alfred who is so kind and gentle, but all anybody ever did to him here in Emerald Kingdom, was to give him the cold shoulder. In the village, he would get pelted by tomatoes. In the training grounds, a man would "accidentally" push him into the mud. He wanted to cry so much, but he wouldn't. He will not give him satisfaction. Therefore, he screamed into his pillow.
"Stupid jerk-face Arthur! Stupid jerk! Stupid jerk! Stupid jerk!"
"Buenas Noches, princesa!"
"Get the fuck up it's time to eat!"
Alfred was being shaken up by Antonio as he tried to wake the sleeping boy up. "Come on Alfred, I made dinner for us and everything."
Alfred slowly got up and looked up at his two friends. Antonio, as always, was cheerful and full of smiles; while Lovino gave of the impression that he was, as usual, cranky. "Hey you guys…" was his sad, tired response.
"Whoa, what's with your face? You look fucking miserable." said Lovino.
"Oh, it's nothing…"
"I know, it that Arthur, isn't it?"
Antonio was right on target.
"Heh, is it that obvious Antonio?"
"Eh that guy's a big, fat, stupid asshole and everyone knows it!" proclaimed Lovino proudly.
"I agree with Lovi," said Antonio "You shouldn't let his words get to you. He means nothing!"
"We had a fight, not it really matters, but he said some pretty hurtful stuff…I wish the Emeralds weren't so mean to me…" Alfred sadly stated, crestfallen.
"Let the bastard rot in hell and you should just forget about him!" said Lovino.
He was obviously trying to make the poor boy feel better. His funny antics and crude language, however insulting, was just Alfred ordered.
"Come on, Antonio made all this food just for us, so cheer up Alfred."
Alfred guessed that when this is one of these rare moments when Lovino is nice, he should take advantage of that before he reverts back to his grumpy, old self.
"Geeze! You know, you guys are really great." said Alfred.
"Hey, you know what you need Alfred?" Antonio asked as walked over to cart full of delicious food.
"No, what is that?" Antonio pulled out a bottle of red Spanish wine. He tossed it playfully back and forth between his hands as he said "Booze!"
The food was served and the cups were filled with wine. This was an equation that would eventually equal to one thing: drunkenness.
"Okay, okay, okay…I got another joke…another one!"
"Ooooo, I wanna hear it! Tell it to me…'Tonio!"
"Y-you…ahushup! The man is trying to tell a joke!"
"Alright…" Antonio laughed "A-a-are you ready?"
"YES!" cried both Alfred and Lovino at the same time.
"Ho-kay! So!" Antonio busted out laughed again, unable to tell the joke.
"Basdard! Yo goning to tell joke…o no?" complained a swaying, drunk Italian.
Antonio giggled a little longer before composing himself again. "Why did the tomato blush?"
The two claimed they didn't know.
"Because it saw the salad dressing! Get it? Salad…dressing? Like it was naked and then the tomato saw it dress itself?"
All three men burst into a fit of laughter. "HAHAHA! GOOD ONE ANTONO!" said Alfred.
Sometimes the maids would pass the weird outsiders with horrified looks.
Their stomachs were full, their hearts content and their sprits merry. It was the perfect atmosphere for singing, wouldn't you say?
"Hey Alfred, how 'bout 'Tonio and I play your song now?" asked Lovino.
"OOOOOH YEEEAAAH, HUH?" said Alfred.
"I had almost forgotten about that."
"Well, come on then, mi amigo. Bamos a cantar! OLE'!"
Suddenly a bit more sober, Antonio grabbed hid acoustic guitar, but then picked up his gold and red electric guitar instead; Alfred had said that the song would sound more awesome with an electric guitar. "As you wish, princesa!" Antonio plugged in the amplifier.
"Ready to go basta!" said Lovino. He plugged his in too. "I am ready to ROCK!"
"Okay…lemme just get my microphone."
During the hours in which Alfred had gone to training, Antonio and Lovino had not only learned his song, but they had set up a part of his room as a makeshift stage. There were wires all over and there were about eight amplifiers. It was bound to be a good show.
"Okay on my count on three, ready? One…two…three!"
Antonio strung the strings to his guitar and Lovino began to give off the beat of the song. They were pretty good, just like how Alfred thought it would sound like.
This…is going to be great!
Arthur was fluming. Needless to say, he was upset…very upset.
"How dare that insolent little brat talk to me that way? Who does she think she is? My mother? She has no part in my life and has no say in the decisions I make!"
Since he is alone, he can yell now.
He paced around the perimeter of the library as he sipped on his tea while he had an internal, heated conversation with himself, occasionally verbally expressing his frustration out loud. The occasional "Damn her!" or "Fuck the lot of them!" came out every now and then.
By the time he had finished his little rant, it was already time for dinner.
As if, I would eat with her at a time like this! was Arthur's first thought.
I'll just have Alice bring the food up and invite HER to eat with ME instead!
Like the obedient, willing servant that she was, Alice brought Arthur his food and sat down with him to eat it.
"You seem… a bit tense, Arthur."
"Do I? Heh, really? I could tell!" he was clearly very irritable right now.
Obvious his fight with his "wife" made him a little upset as well. Sensing this, Alice stopped eating and headed over to where Arthur was sitting. He didn't notice her get up nor when she was right behind him, rubbing his shoulders.
"You need to relax darling."
"Hmmm, yes…I-I mean, what did you just say?" Arthur didn't really bother listening to her.
Covering up her slip of the tongue, she changed the subject.
"My goodness, you are so distracted today! I said…" she grabbed his head it turn it to hers. "You need to relax."
She then pulled the chair out a bit and seated herself promptly on Arthurs lap, straddling his hips. Alice then started kissing Arthur passionately, but he was too far off in his own mind to respond to her tenderness.
Hmph! Telling me what to do with MY life…saying things like how I'M not a good King…and about how apparently I'm a man-whore? Oh no my sweet, you are dead wrong! I am an honest man who makes his own damn decisions!
And with that resolve, Arthur then proceeded to take Alice into his bedroom where he began to undress her.
If I wanna fuck a lovely young maiden every night, for the entire length of our marriage, then I will do as I please and fuck one every night!
He soon forgot about his fight with Marie and began to put all his concentration on making sure that he left Alice satisfied. They didn't get past second base before they realized that something was wrong.
"…"
"What is that?"
"…"
"Do you hear it, too?" asked Alice.
Arthur, hazy by the lust, slurred, "Sounds like…music."
Through the walls of Arthur's bedroom, one could very distinctly hear music; to be more specific, an electric guitar accompanied by drums. It was a nice beat, there was no denying that. But something told Arthur that this was not a good omen.
"Where is it coming from?"
"I don-"
"I WAKE UP EVERY EVENING,"
The sound was deafening. The music itself was very loud, but with the vocals, the sound intensified. Arthur and Alice had to cover their ears at first.
"WITH A BIG SMILE ON MY FACE AND IT NEVER FEELS OUT OF PLACE!"
"Who the bloody hell is singing that?" yelled Alice. The music was too loud to have a normal conversation; yelling was the only of communicating.
"And you're still probably working at a nine to five pace, I wonder how bad that tastes!
When you see my FACE
Hope it gives you HELL, hope it gives you HELL
When you walk MY WAY
Hope it give you HELL, hope it gives you HEEEEEEEEELL!"
With that last vocal cord, Arthur was turned off by hearing these words. Even the vibrations didn't arouse him.
So she thinks she can cockblock me, eh? Well, I would like to see how long she can keep this up, thought Arthur.
But much to Arthur's dismay, his wife did keep it up. In fact, she sang and sang and sang until it was 4 o'clock in the morning. But of course by then, Arthur had already given up and sent the irritated chamber maid, Alice, away. The mood could not be forced, and it was futile to try and fuck to such a cockblocking song like that.
Arthur glanced at his clock: 4:15. He had listened the song over and over again, because his wife would start the song up again once she had finished; there no near end to her madness. "When you sing along, I hope it will feel like HELL!"
"GOD DAMN HER!"
He tried to find a replacement for earplugs since apparently, God from heaven made them all out of stuck from all the nearby stores. After all, why would anyone expect their king to be in dire need of them?
As time went on, the princess had continued to lay down her punishment to her cheating, scumbag of a husband, and she did so every night for five straight nights.
Changing the song each time. Possibly Drunk.
The second night the princess sang another one of her poems
"When you first left me
I wanting more
But you were fucking that girl next door
What'cha do that for? What'cha do that for?
When you first left me
I didn't know what to say
I've never been on my own that way
Just sat by myself all day
I was so lost back then
But with a little help from my friends
I found the light on the tunnel at the end
At first when I see you cry
It makes smile
Yeah it makes me smile!"
By the end of this night, Jacqueline had stormed off infuriated at both the song and the quarrelling couple.
"W-wait, no! Jacqueline stop!" pleaded Arthur has he raced half naked down the hall to catch up with Jacqueline.
"Fuck that shit! You guys cause too much drama for my taste! The next time you have a lover's spat, don't involve me in it!" Jacqueline retorted.
The third night Alfred went with a more sentimental type of song:
"You sit there in your heartache
Waiting on some beautiful boy to
To save you from your old ways
You play forgiveness
Watch him now, here he come
He doesn't look like a thing like Jesus
But he talks like gentleman
Like you imagined when you were young!"
This time it was Christina's turn to be emotionally disrupted.
"Aye dios moi!" she cried and sobbed as she ran away from Arthur's room.
"Perdóname padre porque he pecado!"
"Christina, please come back!"
"No! I come to you no more!" she spat, her eyes full of tears and shame. "Oh Lord, I need a priest! Please forgive Lord Jesus Christ!" she wailed again.
"GODDAMMMIT!" Arthur shouted as he furiously punched a wall.
Then on the fourth night he decided to take the depressing levels even further down to the ground, when he decided to sing:
"But you didn't have to cut me off,
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing,
And I don't even need your love,
But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough!
No you didn't have to stoop so low,
Have your friends collect your records and then change your number,
Guess that I don't need that though,
Now you're just somebody that I used to know!"
Sakura was at a loss of words. Always being the more deeper and philosophical one of the girls, Sakura could clearly hear the hurt in the princess's song which hurt like a knife in her chest. "I-I'm sorry Arthur, but we can no longer see each other."
"No, not you too Sakura!" begs Arthur. The poor lad hadn't had sex in four days and he was beginning to get a bit crazy. "Come on, please? How about a real quick one? What about a hand job? Please, have mercy and have sex with me, I beg of you!"
Finally on the fifth night, Alfred decided to once and for all get back at Arthur. So he decided to sing a very…well, let's just say that it was, for lack of a better word, a very much of a "fuck you, bitch" kind of song:
"So, so what I'm still a rock star
I got my rock moves
And I don't need you
And guess what
I'm havin more fun
And now that we're done
I'm gonna show you tonight
I'm alright
I'm just fine
And you're a tool so
So what
I am a rock star
I got my rock moves
And I don't want you tonight!"
And so, after five nights of practically no sleep and absolutely, 100 percent, zero sex, Arthur decided to talk to his wife about their, dare he say it...marriage.
"So, I can tell that you are upset…and with good reason. Therefore, I promise to never again meet with those women in a bed to commit adultery. I will conjoin our rooms together, and we shall sleep on the same bed. Of course you are hands-off."
"Start insulting. I DARE you."
Arthur, rattled and sexually denied, twitched his eye.
"I will try to-" Arthur tried not to gag out his words, "listen to you more and to-" If there was a God, this would be the best time for him to use his divine wrath and strike lightning onto him. He tried to say these words; really, he did. It took every ounce of his good will to his enemy.
He drawled out some words. "Listen to you more… and t-to t-talk with you m-more if we d-disagree."
Arthur paused to look up at his wife. He was reading off of a piece of parchment that both Arthur and Alfred composed together. It was a type of treaty, you may say, in which stated the things that Arthur was sorry that he had done and things that he promised he would in the future to help their marriage. "Do all of these requirements fit your needs…princess?"
He said that last bit with poison, plus venom and soy sauce and the spiciest peppers in the world and allergies and-
Alfred smiled slyly as he said, "Yeah. As a matter of fact, they do."
Operation Punish Arthur For His Infidelity: Success.