"Mayday"
Abed was shuffling a pack of cards absent-mindedly, humming a random tune under his breath when the click of high heels approaching sounded behind him. He gave a cruel-sounding laugh, as though at nothing, but didn't turn.
"You're late!" he barked suddenly, and the clicking stopped for a moment before starting back up, quicker this time as the wearer rushed towards him.
"Sorry, Mistah J," Sophie said in a rush when she came up beside him, decked out in her classic Harley Quinn costume. "I got caught up in traffic...if ya know what I mean." She grinned mischievously.
"Well, seeing as there's this fancy new in-ven-shun called the, uh, radio," Abed said as though he were trying to explain it to a four-year-old, "yeah, I know exactly what you, ah, mean." With this, he turned to grin at her with his painted face, the trademark glasgow smile of the Joker slathered with clown makeup beaming over at her.
Sophie returned the grin with ease. "You saw my handiwork, Mistah J?" she asked, beaming with pride.
Abed let out a bark of derisive laughter. "It's called a radio, silly kid." (Sophie pouted at being called a kid.) "You don't exactly, uh, see things on a radio, now, do ya?"
Sophie mumbled something unintelligible under her breath.
"What was that?" Abed asked sharply.
Sophie sighed. "I said, no, Mistah J," she replied.
"Good girl. Have a treat," he said, patting her head and tossing her a wrapped chocolate he'd had in his pocket. She caught it with a look of delight and ate it without a moment's hesitation.
"Fank yew, Mustah J," she said, her words muffled by the piece of chocolate in her mouth.
"Let nobody say I'm not kind to...well...you, on occasions," he said with a shrug as he took out a prop (at least, she sincerely hoped it was a prop) knife from the inside pocket of his overcoat and started twirling it expertly between his fingers. "Well, sweet lips, it's about time to get this show on the road," he said, placing an arm around her shoulder. "Wanna grab a, ah, burger on the way there?" he said, referring to their latest play to lure out the Bat.
Sophie smirked. "We-e-ell, that all depends, Mistah J... can I get a side order of freedom fries with mine?"
Abed threw his head back as they walked and cackled. "Well, toots, I think that sounds like a fan-tas-tic idea." His tone was tinged with wicked amusement. "How about we celebrate with... fireworks?"
Sophie winked. "It's like you read my mind, Mistah J!"
A/N: Not fluffy or flirty at all, but I couldn't resist the idea of writing Abed as the Joker after I saw the picture of the Community members as Batman villains. If you want to see it just search "Community Abed Joker" in Google images.