Chakotay had always considered himself a relatively patient man. Now however, after being in this room for well over six hours, utterly helpless, he knew that wasn't true. He could only stand letting his eyes roam over the unfilled birthing pool, or the flashing lights of the variety of monitors, for so long before he had to search the two doctors' alert faces for signs. They revealed nothing, anymore than Sandra's measured pace as she moved around the room in preparation showed any hint of undue haste or anxiety. Really, the only one he could look to for signs of progress was the only person he wished could join him in this animated suspension of waiting. Seven's every groan of pain hit him like a fist in the gut, him gasping a little with her in empathy as her body strained and bucked against every contraction. He turned towards her, feeling guilty that he was finding it so difficult to look at her when he should be her staunchest supporter. They'd had a strange flip in position, Seven's emotions, her dark thoughts, had slipped back under the surface in the clinical, detached environment of the hospital, compared to how frozen with fear she'd been in the familiarity of their home. In contrast, being here was flooding him with memories that he'd managed to avoid elsewhere. Flashbacks of Seven screaming and crying at the terrible climax of her last stint in hospital, in a room eerily similar to this one, haunted him despite all efforts to fight them away…
A whimper from Seven, almost as if she shared his thoughts, pulled him back into reality. He instinctively reached out and stroked the feverish skin of her arm soothingly; she'd advised him earlier that with her enhanced physiology she might accidently fracture his hand if he held hers. She twisted herself further among the disordered, soaked sheets with a moan. Her usually vivid blue eyes were dim and glazed over as she gazed back at him unseeingly. He swallowed a lump in his throat as he saw how out of it she was, the cocktail of painkillers she was on would probably be enough to knock himself and most humans out altogether, the Doctor had said he had to get creative to ease her pain but not give her enough for her implants to react badly. As it was, she was barely sentient. Fragments of the Collective's code based language and snatches of Swedish too broken for his Universal Translator to pick up were all that had left her lips for the past hour as she slipped into near delirium. The fact that they were almost completely mutually incomprehensible at the moment left him feeling even more impotent and helpless. He was both thankful, and jealous, that Irene understood enough of what Seven muttered out between contractions to be able to offer consistent murmurs of comfort.
He jumped in his chair as he saw the Doctor studying the most recent data of what his tricorder was reeling off. "She's transitioning." The normally verbose hologram announced without preamble, "Stop the drugs now, she'll need to be fully with us."
"Transitioning?" Chakotay echoed anxiously, standing to his full height now to face the Doctor, "What does that mean?" He demanded when instead of immediately answering the Doctor began to issue instructions to Perritt and Sandra, who both had moved efficiently from restive to ready.
"It means she's almost ready to push, at 9cm and dilating quickly to reach 10." The Doctor explained quickly before flashing Chakotay a brief but still reassuring smile, his eyebrows slightly arched, "Didn't you read those pregnancy data files I sent you?"
Chakotay ran a nervous hand distractedly through his hair, almost choking on a brittle laugh, "I did, but do you know how little sleep I've had Doctor? Not good for my memory."
"That's only going to get worse you know, it's called 'baby brain'." Sandra told him jovially as she gently tugged him back towards Seven's bedside, "Be ready to talk her through this if you can, she's going to be scared when the drug haze she's under now lifts in a few minutes." She confided seriously. Chakotay obediently sat back down next to Seven, returning Irene's wobbly smile as she took her place sitting at the other side. "I'm taking the drip out now." Sandra informed them both slowly, disconnecting the potent drug drip from the huge canola Seven had embedded in her human hand.
Chakotay inhaled sharply in sympathy as he saw Seven flinch as the drip was removed. The frown marring her beloved, beautiful face was as deep as he'd ever seen it. He rubbed the back of his hand over her cheek as she began to blink dazedly, the dreamy haze of the drugs already beginning to fade away. As guilt shot brutally through him, he had to gulp hard, he knew this would be worth it, but it had been a torturous road. In all honesty, he'd never expected to have children, had believed just a few years ago that his life decisions had led him to give up the chance of a family. After all, being a Maquis leader wasn't exactly conductive to a peaceful existence and by the time Voyager and his crew had collided in the Delta Quadrant he'd already passed forty, add to that the fact that really the role of First Officer, in his view of it anyway, didn't fit any better with the traditional role of husband and father anymore than his life in the Maquis had. He didn't like to think of it, but he'd gradually become apathetic, even jaded, towards the lonely turn his life was taking. He'd accepted, or at least had believed that he had, that the binding love of his parents, of Tom and B'Elanna too, wasn't going to be part of his life. He'd had relationships of course, flings on away missions more accurately, he was a passionate man, but he'd long since stopped believing there would be anything else. Occasionally while on Voyager, the depressing fact that his longest relationship in the span of a decade had been with Seska would resound in his head as he sat alone in his quarters. Then there had been Seven. Many people later would say that their love had bloomed suddenly, joining only two dots in their relationship, those between him trying to suck her out of an airlock and then four years later being caught kissing while braced against that very same airlock. The two of them knew it hadn't been like that though, firstly respect, then confidence and affection, and finally love. It had blossomed into marriage, and he knew he would've been contented if they'd never conceived, after all he'd never expected a love like theirs, how could he ask for more than it seeing them into their twilight years and beyond? Seven had seen it differently, much as she tried not to. He understood why, she was young, there was almost nineteen years between them, and it had showed only in this. Despite her trauma with the Borg there was no reason why she, who was so good with children, should resign herself to childlessness the way he had before he'd even met her. She'd been so happy, relieved, when she'd fallen pregnant the first time, and he'd been surprised how deeply that happiness had penetrated his soul too. The second time they'd both embraced that joy wholeheartedly, perhaps too readily with hindsight, but now here they were, having survived that together. It hurt so much. Even the thought of that pain again cast a shadow over this longed for result…
"Chakotay?" Seven's weakened voice managed to reach his ears, "What happened? I can't remember…"
"I'm not surprised." Chakotay said softly, leaning over so that their faces were almost touching, "Those painkillers you asked for really knocked you out, I couldn't understand what you were saying most of the time you were so delirious…"
"Really?" Seven asked disbelievingly, her breath leaving her in short bursts. She couldn't remember anything but the strike of each contraction for a long stretch of time back, "I'm sorry…"
"Don't be." Chakotay interrupted firmly, kissing her forehead as she began to cling to him for support as another contraction built up within her. "It probably spared me from hearing a lot of curses directed at me. Irene didn't provide me with a running translation, but…"
"I would never curs…" Seven started to say, but the thought flew out of her head as the full power of the contraction seized her, coupled with a new punishing pressure in her lower back and between her legs. "Ah!" She shrieked in shock, digging her nails into her side in a vain attempt to unwind the muscles. She fell back against the bed again as another wave of the same pain struck her again almost as soon as the first ended, within seconds. "Doctor!" she cried out fearfully.
"Don't worry Seven, whatever it might feel like to the contrary, this is perfectly normal." The Doctor told her smoothly, pulling out his tricorder once more as Sandra began to pull her patient's shaking legs apart, "That pain, the pressure, means you've entered the second stage. You're 10cm dilated."
Seven felt her stomach lurch, tears of fears she no longer had the energy to be ashamed of burning at her eyes. "But...I can't push now Doctor, not with this pain, there must be something wrong…"
"No, nothing, I promise Seven. This is just the process. We'll all help you through it, okay?" The Doctor consoled her patiently.
Seven saw the lack of panic on all face except Chakotay's as another contraction slammed into her and as her mind cleared a little as it ended she knew they were being truthful. "Just breathe through it again Annika, and scream if you want, it'll all be over after this." Irene advised gently, helpfully pushing damp strands of hair out of Seven's face as she repositioned to hunch over her swollen belly in preparation for pushing.
Seven couldn't take much comfort from the advice to scream, in fact she felt more ready to be sick again. "I feel nauseous again…" She whispered as she fought the urge to ignore the Doctor's instructions and curl in on herself. Sandra was prepared for that, a small bucket already held out for her, and this time Seven did manage to completely empty her drug-addled stomach. "I've had enough of labour now…" She admitted brokenly as she sank back on the bed.
"The only effective way of doing that is to start pushing just as I tell you." The Doctor told her, knowing just the right language to use with his old friend.
The process of was much more drawn out than she'd anticipated before. She was in too much agony to keep count as accurately as she would have, but she knew she'd been pushing for a long time. Her energy supply was utterly exhausted, she doubted she could lift a finger if she wanted to but yet she was still pushing with apparently very little progress. "I want one big push from you now Seven." The Doctor instructed briskly, "Try not to expend energy on making a noise now, concentrate all you have on this."
"I can't…" Seven whispered almost inaudibly, her voice hoarse from panting and screaming through her previous pushes. She turned her eyes to Chakotay pleadingly, "Please…"
Chakotay's pale face managed to form a smile, "Really Seven, this might be the last one, we can all see the baby's head." He cupped her face as she released a haggard sigh, "I'm sorry sweetheart, I know you're completely spent…"
Seven took a deep breath as she felt another contraction climb up her body. It really did seem like resistance, against labour at least, was futile. Struggling to find a grip on the slippery sheets as her whole body burned, she forced her muscles to flex and propel again with every piece of physical and mental strength she had left. Just as she thought she'd failed, she felt something heavy start to slip against her thighs. She lifted her head enough then to see her baby's head, her shocked gasp ragged and breathless with the surreal sight as well as the partial relief. "Just short, little pushes now." The Doctor told her, his voice quieter now.
Seven's own head was throbbing until she was almost blinded as she tried to obey. Thankfully, panting at the force of the contractions finally seemed to kick in and within moments she heard a high pitched, startled, breathy wail. A weight was suddenly lifted onto her flopping stomach, wetness soaking through her hospital gown. "You have a little girl." Seven could hear the beaming smile in the Doctor's voice without looking at him, her gaze already utterly fixated on the baby.
She appeared healthy, stubbornly alive as she wriggled into her. "Another girl…" Seven breathed faintly as she tentatively let her fingers brush against the baby's wet but still silky soft skin, though that skin was only a few shades pinker right now that the blue fleshiness of the umbilical cord. It took the taste of salt on her lips to realise that tears were streaming down her face, to become aware of the sobs wracking her chest.
She heard Chakotay beside her, his breath catching as if he wasn't sure whether to cry along with her or laugh. "Well done honey…" He breathed huskily against her ear as he too looked down at their daughter, his smile widening, all evidence of his exhaustion gone. "She's perfect…" He murmured in wonder as he too let his hand settle on the baby's tiny, downy head and used the scissors Sandra happily handed him to cut the cord.
The Doctor looked into the new parents' faces with a pensive smile on his face. "We're just going to have to check that by taking her over to the diagnostic station…" He said softly, giving Seven's hand a sympathetic, reassuring squeeze before lifting the baby away carefully and handing her over to waiting Dr Perritt.
Seven gaped for a split second before her face froze into stricken terror as Perritt disappeared with her daughter to the back of the room out of her sight. "No!" she choked out in a thin cry, "Bring her back…don't take her away…" Panicky adrenaline urged her to try to get up, but her body collapsed unwillingly back onto the bed.
"Seven, Seven…." Chakotay told her fiercely, kneeling on the floor by the bed, "Of course they'll bring her back. They're just checking she's okay, I promise you my love…"
"What if she's not okay?" Seven forced out tearfully, struggling against her leaden body to sit up and crying out in panic and frustration when Chakotay and Irene pleaded with her to calm down. "Please go and see her Chakotay, please…" She begged him.
Chakotay stiffened, his loyalties agonisingly split. He was almost as desperate to see the baby, although he could still hear her crying, as Seven was but he didn't feel able to leave his wife when she was on the verge of distraught hysteria. "I will darling, but they're probably already bringing her back…" He tried to rationalise with her.
Irene turned to him as she tried to dry her niece's tears. "Just go be with the baby right now, I'll stay with Annika." She sighed in relief as Chakotay understood her with a grateful nod and rose to follow Dr Perritt. "He's away to be with her now Annika, everything's fine. You can hear her crying can't you?"
Seven forced herself to gulp, her world spinning with dizziness and lingering pain. "Yes…" She whispered in relief, surprised when the frightened tears kept flowing, "Oh, I'm being so irrational…" She realised guiltily.
Irene chuckled weakly, "Min älskling, you just had a baby, of course you're not completely rational…"
"Yes Seven, your hormones are playing tricks on you, that's all." The Doctor assured her kindly, "From what I've seen of your daughter, she is perfect. You'll get her back when I'm sure you're fine, you still have to deliver your placenta…" He broke off and immediately started to attend to her, his face tensing as he stared down at his tricorder.
"What's wrong?" Seven heard Irene mutter as another, if less intense, pain gripped her.
The Doctor ignored her, completely focused. "Just relax Seven." He instructed her quickly. Seven tried to, but as she looked down the bed at him she realised that the bed sheets were rapidly turning crimson beneath her. A gasp of horror caught in her throat, but she was already starting to swoon, black spots intruding on her blurring vision. A hypospray plunged into her throat and as her world began to refocus, she heard the Doctor mutter, "Thank God…" He smiled at her as she found his gaze, "Just stopping a post-partum haemorrhage, you'll be okay now as long as you start a blood and nanoprobe transfusion. The good news is that your labour really is over now."
Chakotay had frozen en-route back to the bed, his daughter snuffling in his arms with Perritt just behind him, upon hearing the Doctor's words. "You've helped her Doctor?" he asked thickly, his eyes morbidly fixated on the bloody sheets Sandra was expertly removing. "She'll be okay? Should I…" He began to rant, his tight chest bringing his breathing to a halt for several seconds.
"I won't be going anywhere, but the danger has passed." The Doctor assured him, stepping aside, with an indulgent grin at the baby as he scanned her, to allow Chakotay to return to Seven.
"What did Dr Perritt say?" Seven demanded, her drained face tight with worry even as she opened her arms to cradle her new baby to her.
Chakotay grinned at her, trying not to focus on how deathly pale her complexion was, as he carefully lowered their daughter from his arms into hers. "That I was to bring her straight back to you." He murmured, kissing her lightly on the hair as she bowed over the baby, utterly absorbed by her. He swallowed as he remembered Perritt's guilty expression as they'd both listened to Seven's distressed cries. "He needed to check her for wayward nanoprobes, but there are none. She's a perfectly healthy full-term human baby."
"Perfect…" Seven echoed in a relieved whisper as she gazed adoringly down at her daughter in dazed wonder, "Thank goodness."
Chakotay tilted her head up for a moment to kiss her, full on the lips this time. "Thank you." He murmured intently.
Seven smiled at him softly over the baby's head as she rested her cheek there. "You're welcome, and thank you too."
The baby's confused, snuffling whimpers developed suddenly into shrill cries and Chakotay chuckled wryly as he tried to help Seven settle her, "Maybe she's annoyed we didn't thank her too…"
Seven shifted in discomfort as she held the baby to her chest, blushing a little as she realised she was already expressing milk in response to the baby's wails. "No, I think she's hungry…" She twisted her head round to the Doctor as he approached to begin her blood transfusion, "Can I feed her Doctor?"
"If you don't, she'll soon be crying louder." The Doctor half-joked, before smiling in understanding of her anxiety, "Your cybernetic systems won't effect breastfeeding at all, don't worry."
Seven nodded distractedly in acknowledgement, grimacing despite herself as she let the baby latch onto her. She began to suckle strongly immediately. Chakotay watched her expression in concern, "Does it hurt?"
"It feels…strange, yes." Seven admitted reluctantly, knowing he'd fret over her now. "But not as uncomfortable as not feeding her." She added quickly, considering the shock the crying was to her ears and the painful build up of milk in her breasts.
Chakotay relaxed a bit, "Okay then." He replied softly, before flashing his distinctive happy grin at her as he realised something. "You know we'll have to name her before our old crew turn up here banging at the door. I think the Doctor will be able to put them off until afternoon visiting hours to give you a rest, but we're soon going to be invaded."
A fond smile at the thought of her friends tugged mildly at Seven's lips, but really her thoughts were quite distant from them as her eyes swept over her daughter over and over again. Somewhere deep inside, this still didn't feel quite real, even as the baby cuddled into her skin for warmth as she sucked. "I suppose now that she's here, ours, we should name her…" She let her voice trail off, the last of her adrenaline starting to drain away. Honestly, she didn't want to think of anything right now, she just wanted to be sure of the child in her arms and fall asleep...
Chakotay touched her arm lightly, his face warm with love and understanding as he looked between the two beloved faces of his girls. "You're too tired, we can talk about it later…"
Guiltily roused by his kindness, Seven shifted position to let the baby nurse on the other side. "She's not going to let me sleep for a little while yet." She reminded him, "What do you suggest for her name?"
"Well…" Chakotay started thoughtfully, "I'd be happy with naming her after you…"
Seven's metal brow rose in teasing amusement, "I can explain away questions about my designation, but…"
"You know that's not what I meant." Chakotay replied, "Annika is a beautiful name for a lovely girl."
Seven freed one hand from holding the baby to squeeze his, "Thank you." She murmured, "But she should have her own name. What about one of the names your people use?"
Chakotay shook his head, "There aren't actually that many names in my language, and anyway, I can see that she's going to take after you…"
"Is that your way of saying that you don't want me to accidently name her after one of your ex-girlfriends?" Seven asked, completely deadpan.
"I didn't have that many girlfriends when I lived on Dorvan Seven…" He protested, but then flushed a little, "But yeah, that thought did cross my mind if you chose a name from my native tongue…"
"Don't worry; I wouldn't have inflicted one of your bad memories on her…" Seven assured him, laughing even as her body and the baby both complained at the slight movement.
"Am I missing something?" Irene commented wryly as she stood in the doorway cradling a mug of coffee.
"We were discussing names Aunt Irene." Seven explained tiredly.
Chakotay looked to her for support, "Irene, how many variants of Annika are there? Your niece is being resistant to the idea of naming her daughter exactly after her." His affectionate smile in Seven's direction as he said this revealed that he wasn't truly annoyed.
Irene's blue eyes, so like Seven's and those of her new great-niece, lit up with pleasure at being asked. "Oh, well I'm fine with that stubbornness, having two Annikas would confuse me at least." She laughed softly as she sat down beside Chakotay, looking between the couple warmly, "I do think choosing a similar name would be very sweet though." She saw Seven blush a little as she nodded slowly and knew that her niece had only refuted her husband's idea out of modesty. "I think our family has used all the possible variants at some point, we're very much creatures of habit. Anna, Annika of course, Annelie, Anja…"
"I recall thinking that our family historically used a very limited range of female names when I researched my genealogy on Voyager." Seven remarked thoughtfully, "Daughters were almost invariably called Anna, Elisabeth or an appropriate diminutive."
"Yeah, your grandmother really kicked up a storm in the family when she insisted on breaking the mould by calling me Irene." Irene agreed, "There's been several of those Anna names I mentioned used, as well as several Elses, Lisas, Beths…" She smiled sentimentally to herself, "I remember, if either my Jakob or Matthias had been a girl, I wanted to call her Anneliese, since that's a combination of both…"
Chakotay paused, his ears liked the name but he wasn't sure his mouth would wrap around Irene's strongly Nordic pronunciation and accent to say it himself. "Anna-LEES-ah…" He sounded out, finding it easier to say than he'd thought. "How do you spell it?"
Irene and Seven exchanged a small, knowing smirk. "A-n-n-e-l-i-e-s-e." Seven spelled out, "Anneliese." She said it easily, for a moment taking on her native Swedish accent the Borg had made her forget. "It's a lovely name, very appropriate." She murmured as she studied her daughter's face with suspended wonder once again.
"It is." Chakotay agreed happily, moving to sit on the edge of the bed to be closer to his family. He could see from the contented expression on Seven's face that, although she might not say so, their baby's name had just been chosen. He laughed good-naturedly to himself as he reached over to caress a fingertip down his now sleeping daughter's feather soft cheek. "Hello Anneliese, I promise I'll remember how to spell your name before you have to, it's not like 'Chakotay' is any easier to write at first either."
Seven kissed his cheek, "She won't need to call you Chakotay, you're her Papa, remember?" she whispered in his ear.
"How could I forget?" Chakotay replied in the same tone, carefully positioning his arm to give her fragile body a gentle hug.
"Why don't you hold her for a while in that capacity as her father?" Seven suggested softly, slowing moving Anneliese from her arms, they were shaking with exhaustion, to his.
Chakotay responded by giving her a grateful kiss as his arms curled protectively around their daughter. "Of course."
Seven now let herself relax completely, sinking fully back onto the bed to watch the scene, even as her eyes began to drift closed. "I think I'm reconsidering our decision about a middle name…" She mumbled as she dreamily focused Chakotay with Anneliese.
Chakotay's gaze snapped up from Anneliese's face to her own in surprise. "Why's that love? Any ideas?"
"If you wanted her first name after me, why can't I want her middle name to be in your honour?" Seven pointed out, a fond smile tugging at her lips as she took in his slightly shocked expression.
"What, like Taya?" he asked uncertainly, "Seven honey, I wasn't being serious when I suggested that to Tom and B'Elanna before, you don't have to…"
Seven gave a tired laugh, "Miral wasn't yours, Anneliese is." She met his eyes seriously, suddenly wide awake again, "I want to, nothing about this in an obligation."
Chakotay smiled, having to blink back a sudden tear or two at her words. "No, it never has been has it?" he murmured, only now noticing that Irene had left them alone again. Carefully, he laid Anneliese down on the bed beside Seven and settled on his side facing Seven so that the baby was between them. "Anneliese Taya Kotay it is then." He confirmed with a soft smile.
Seven nodded in agreement, but fresh tears still reflected on her pale cheeks as she returned the smile. "We're going to be fine now, aren't we?" she whispered.
Chakotay cupped her face with his warm hand, slowly brushing her tears away with his broad thumb. "Yes my love, we're fine now and tomorrow looks good too."
A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D Now that we've reached the end, I'd like to thank lightsbane1905 again for the idea as well as my awesome beta NikkiB1973 and all the reviewers up to this point, who include: Sweetdeath04, Jedi Master Misty Sman-Esay, battlevalkyrie, Teal06, juliaw, EMcKinney, xXSilentCrescendoXx, Aussie Sci-Fi Tragic, Tv appreciator, 9ud9ir190ne6ad and Bluesky20. Of course thanks to any other readers and reviewers too! :)