Pieces 6

Every day Xena is away, is a day I'm worried she won't come back. She is only mortal after all, and she bleeds just like any other warrior out there. It's been a month now since she left; my stomach has grown considerably in that time. I think that's mostly due to Cyrene feeding whenever she sees my face. The food is good, how can I possibly turn it down?

My little house is coming along nicely. I still can't believe I have a home, it feels so surreal sometimes. Cyrene made a few men in the village help me with the more tasking jobs, speeding up the process greatly. It's already fall, the air has been getting cooler; so I would love to be in my home before winter hits. The house itself is situated just outside of town, still within a short walking distance from the tavern but also far enough off the main road to insure privacy.

I've found that the people in Amphipolis seem to feel sorry for me. A young widowed, soon to be mother all on her own? What's more tragic than that? People have been giving me their old furniture; things they saved for their children who never claimed it. I wanted to give them money, but all insist that a good story is all they need. I'm not sure a story can pay for a whole bed; not a small bed, but a big one that I could have only imagined in my dreams.

For the first time since coming here, I am sitting out on my front porch watching the sun fade into the horizon. As the men left today, they promised they'd be back to start on the barn. I insisted they had already done too much, but not one would listen to me.

I don't feel like the kid I was when I first started out with Xena. Sitting here in my rocking chair, on my porch, with a baby growing in my belly; it's all made me feel old all of a sudden. I even look different. Aside from the fact that I'm with child; I wear loose flowing dresses instead of that green top, I've cut my hair short because it was taking too long to wash. I never realized how tiring it is just to have a baby grow.

I close my eyes and hum quietly as I gently rock in my chair. The sky is growing darker, but I just don't want to go in yet. There's a sense of peace that I've craved for so long. Of course I can't believe I've ended up on a farm, with a baby. The very thing I ran from is what I've become. Xena, though, is the wild card; the one thing that keeps me grounded and sane. I didn't realize that having this life with her by my side was remotely possible, let alone so awesome.

'I go away for a month and look at you.' I nearly fall out of my chair as Xena's voice seemingly pops out of nowhere. Looking up, I find crystalline blue eyes smiling down at me.

'Xena?' She pulls me up and into her arms, almost strangling me with the fierceness of her hug.

'What did you do to your hair?' She pulls back a little, ruffling my short blonde hair.

'I got tired of it.' I shrug, but I can't wipe the smile off my face. Xena pulls back more, looking down at my stomach.

'Wow.' She whispers in amazement as she places her hand on my abdomen.

'Where's Argo?' I look around noticing I don't see her horse anywhere.

'Oh, I left her at mom's.' Her eyes are glazed over in wonder, still staring down at my growing belly. 'She said the house is almost finished.' I take her hand in mine and pull her through the doorway, finally breaking her of her trance.

'Isn't it pretty?' I gush, so proud of what the home has become.

'Yeah…pretty.' Xena grins at me, allowing her eyes to wander over every nook and cranny of the place.

'Are you hungry?'

'Huh?' Her hands trail across the furniture as she walks around the room.

'Are, you, hungry?' Her head pops up as she finally hears me.

'Oh yeah, hold on.' In a few quick strides she's back out the door. I'm momentarily confused as I watch her walk back in with a huge grin; a saddle bag across her shoulder and a basket in her hand. She holds up the basket as if it's the greatest prize ever. 'Mother insisted I bring some food. She feels you don't eat enough.'

'What?! That woman is going to make me fatter than this house.' Xena chuckles, but says nothing as she sits the basket down on the table. In the light of the fire, I manage to take inventory of her wounds. She has a couple of long gashes that have been stitched closed, along with various bruises and scrapes. A tear falls down my cheek; the realization of what could have happened suddenly hitting me.

'What's wrong?' The smile on Xena's face is replaced with concern as she comes up to me, cupping my face in her hands.

'Nothing.' I sniffle. 'Hormones.' My fingers trace across the skin on her arm near the wound.

'Hey I'm ok.' She stoops a little, trying to look into my eyes. 'No crying, I'm here.'

'You could have died.' My voice cracks as I look up sadly.

'But I didn't, I'm still here to bug you.' She cracks a little grin. 'Hey. I promise no more missions till after this little thing pops out.' She glances down at my stomach.

'Ok.' I try to laugh, but it barely comes out. 'So what did your mother pack?'

We sit down in the quiet comfort of our new house, enjoying each other's company for the first time in weeks. Xena mostly avoids the topic of her mission except to say that she won and kicked a lot of ass. Like her mother, she continually piles food in front of me, insisting I need to eat more. Finally, after a few hours, we're sitting in front of the fire place enjoying the silence.

'Xena?'

'Ya?' She takes a sip of her port.

'Since you've been gone, I've been thinking.'

'About what?' She shifts in her chair to better look at me.

'Well I guess I want to go see my family, but only if you come with me, I might need help escaping.' I give her a little grin.

'Of course, I can't let you go wandering around on your own.' She shakes her head at the thought.

'I've also thought about what you told me.' She sighs, turning away again.

'Gabrielle…'

'No, let me talk.' I cut her off before she can go on. Her eyes shift back towards me. 'Everyday that I couldn't be by your side, helping you fight…or you know just looking good in the background,' I grin at her. 'Every day I was worried that I might never see you again.' Xena opens her mouth to speak but I raise my hand up, stopping her. 'I know I can't live without you, and I know I love you. And I'm not saying that because of my hormones or anything.' She sits back in her chair, regarding me for a moment.

'So what are you saying?' Her eyebrow cocks up in question.

'I'm saying that…..maybe I want to be more than friends.' I look down at my feet, not wanting to make eye contact.

'Why now?'

'I talked to your mother and she gave me great advice.' Xena lunges forward in her chair.

'My mother knows?!' I can't help but laugh at the shock on her face.

'She's the one who brought it up actually.' This only relaxes Xena a micro fraction.

'What did she say?' Her eyes narrow at me.

'She said I'm good for you. That loving me is probably the sanest thing you've done in life.' Xena grunts at that.

'Probably.' She mumbles, finally sitting back in her chair.

'And….. she said not to worry about things I can't control.'

'Like what?' Her head cocks to one side as she looks intently at me.

'That one day you'll leave, you'll break my heart.' I can't bring myself to look at her. Xena goes silent, I can't even hear her breathe.

'All I can do is my best.' She says after a while. 'You realize, you're the only person ever in my life that I talk to like this.' She leans forward, taking my hands in hers. I look up; her eyes sparkle with unshed tears. 'I don't know why and I don't know how but I do know this is something I never thought I'd feel let alone have. I can't just let it go.' What do I say to that?

'I haven't been able to sleep since you've been gone.' I feel somewhat shy saying this to her.

'Me neither.' She smiles, squeezing my hands in hers. We sit in silence again, looking into each other's eyes.

'I can heat up some water for a bath if you want?' She nods her head.

'Thanks.'

Morning comes with Xena's arms wrapped around me as she's curled into my back. I know she's awake but I don't really want to move just yet.

'You sleep ok?' She mumbles against the back of my head.

'Yeah.' Looking out the window I can see the sky slowly lighten up. She pulls me closer, her hands caressing my stomach. I can't say I want her to stop, it feels so nice. The sudden urge to pee forces me up and out of the bed though. 'Gotta pee.' I tell Xena as I shuffle myself quickly out the door. I can hear her chuckling as I retreat for the outhouse, making it just in time to avoid an accident.

That little disaster averted, I return to the bedroom to find the bed empty. Well what exactly was I expecting? Since I'm alone though, I take the time to wash myself down before putting on a dress. The smell of food pulls me towards the kitchen where I find Xena toiling away over a fire.

'I have an idea.' She says, turning around to put some meat on a plate in front of me. There's fresh bread too; I think she was faking at being a bad cook.

'Ok.' The meat is delicious and is soon accompanied by a few eggs. Making her own plate, she sits down across from me.

'Well this was more of my mother's idea.'

'Ok.' She's got me curious.

'Well maybe I could like, court you.' Her face is flush with embarrassment as she twitches nervously on the bench.

'Xena, you don't have to do that.' I smile, but she dismisses me.

'No.' She looks up with a renewed sense of determination. 'You deserve to be treated right. I've never done it before but that doesn't mean I shouldn't now.' She continues to twitch and shift.

'Xena. You're sweet really, but I know that's not you.' I pat her hand before eating again.

'Well it's going to be me.'

'That's very un-warrior princess you know.' I try to tease her, but she refuses to take the bait.

'Well only the best warrior princess' know how to treat a lady.' She gives me a big grin, amused by her own comment.

'Ok, I'm in.' I wonder how exactly Xena plans on wooing me. This may be interesting.