AN: Okay the last bit might be a little cracky, but I'm writing at two in the morning because I can't sleep and Hermione being the one to notice everything seemed funny to me.

Arthur Kirkland And the Job

Chapter Four

In his haste to get to Prussia before the fool could do permanent damage England was paying attention to his surroundings and ran straight into someone. On instinct he caught the woman before she fell. Recognizing her instantly he was too panicked to think before he blurted out "Charity Burbage!"

Her startling green-gray eyes looked at him warily under a mane of dark curls carefully pinned down for the occasion. He recognized her from the Daily Prophet articles she wrote against the current anti-werewolf legislation that was circulating the Wizengamot suggested by the Senior Undersecretary to the Minister Dolores Umbridge and from winning Witch of the Year in Witch Weekly for becoming the first witch to graduate alma mater from University of Britain For Higher Magical Education. A school that was even more world renowned than Hogwarts and only the most serious academics went to. England had gone there under a guise when the school first open. Having experienced it England was more than impressed by the skills it took to graduate.

"From the Prophet." England told her quickly not wanting her to come to the wrong conclusion. She still looked wary, but England didn't doubt she had good reason. Anyone who supported werewolves was usually faced with rather violent opposition.

"I'm Arthur Kirkland the student-teacher, I was just impressed with your work. I find the treatment of our fellow British citizens with 'furry problems' appalling also." He elaborate releasing her shoulders to take a step back and offer his hand. She looked at him a few more moments, but beamed and shook it. He liked the shake it was firm and confident.

"I'll let you off easy this time Kirkland, I'm in too good of a mood." She told him cheerfully, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "Dumbledore's waiting for you, I've got to get to the Feast before the students realize they outnumber the professors and do something heinous. The Weasley Twins alone will probably be realizing that without Dumbledore, Snape, or McGonagall present they might actually get away with something."

The woman waved good by and hurried away with a literal skip in her step. England shook his head and ducked into the Hospital Wing. To his horror he realized Prussia was conscious, and he was talking to the Headmaster. And Dumbledore was listening. England could not let this go on.

"Headmaster." England shouted as he approached, Dumbledore looked up with that damnable twinkle in his eyes and even worse Prussia's eyes were practically glowing and he wore that disturbing smirk-smile that just told England this wasn't going to end good for him. The other two in the room, a rather dazed looking man England knew was Remus Lupin and Madame Pomfrey whom England had already been introduced to.

"Hello there Arthur, dear boy." Dumbledore welcomed warmly making England's heart sink even further. Definitely not good. "Your friend Mr. Beilschmidt hear was just telling us the thrilling tale how the two of you decided to get work at Hogwarts together. I'm sure you must have been very upset when he was delayed from leaving home because of, what was it again?"

"My little brother's engagement." The red eyed bastard told him looking towards England with a downright smug expression. England had to remind himself that even if he could get away with it the Killing Curse did not effect nations, even annoying ex-nations. England knew from personal experience.

"I didn't realize Ludwig's relationship had gotten so far." England snarled through clenched teeth. Prussia looked even happier in the face of his annoyance.

"Ludwig didn't either, but then Lovino said his brother was not about to live in sin with the 'potato bastard'. Apparently Lovino is very, very Catholic." Prussia told him calmly. Madame Pomfrey shared a questioning look with Lupin, but both quickly went about what they were doing, seeming not to really care. Dumbledore though gave Prussia curious look that suddenly made England remember something that probably only one other person besides Dumbledore and himself knew.

Dumbledore was homosexual. And considering in Wizarding Society it had just recently became illegal to beat your spouse that was not something widely accepted. At least by the older families. Half-bloods and Muggleborns were pretty calm about it depending on their upbringing. Hearing Prussia so easily announce this without even a bit of shame was probably quite refreshing to the man.

"Albus hear was going to give me a position." Prussia told him gleefully. "Isn't that wonderful Artie?"

Dumbledore was beaming and Lupin was nodding along vaguely. Even Madame Pomfrey was looking downright pleased. England had to resist the urge to congratulate him. Something was going on. England narrowed his eyes and took Prussia in. It wasn't a spell, he hadn't touched his wand, how exactly had he gotten that anyway, which lay on the bedside table. If anything the feeling rushing over England right now was almost familiar. So familiar he could almost name it.

England's eyes settled on a circular shape under Prussia's shirt. His eyes widened as he realized what was going on and England darted foreword grabbed the offending object and pulled it off the man. Instantly the dazed looks of agreement vanished from everyone's expressions, except strangely Dumbledore's. England threw him a suspicious look wondering if the man had known about the charm and been resisting it. The Nurse and werewolf looked at England amazed as Prussia pouted.

"Veela hair necklace." England told the as he quickly destroyed it with an incendio. "When the hair is given freely it will provide a similar effect to that of a Veela, it makes people more trusting of the person wearing it and can even cause attraction, that though not as strong as that of a Veela can be very potent."

Madame Pomfrey let out a furious hiss and gave Prussia a glare that scared England. Lupin looked like he'd been shot and slightly sick.

"That's why I believed your story about the heart condition." Lupin said starring at Prussia horrified. "You could have been a murderer or a pedophile and I let you near Harry without a fight."

England stiffened and looked at Prussia furiously. If the Prussian had done anything even slightly to the Potter child he would personally find away to kill him or if not make him spend the rest of his possibly immortal existence writhing in pain. For now though he needed to know what exactly Prussia had done.

"Heart condition?" he questioned. Prussia who'd been watching Madame Pomfrey warily answered.

"It was really an awesome excuse if I do say so myself. I said I had a heart condition that was potentially fatal. The magic during Apparating and using the floo could make it act up and kill me. That's why I was on the train to see Dumbledore." Prussia told him sounding a little proud of himself. He turned to look at Lupin with a frown. "Besides I'm not a murderer or a pedo, so no harm no foul."

Lupin did not look convinced. England though had bigger concerns. Dumbledore's expression was the same. In fact he looked downright mischievous, before England had a chance to comment though he spoke.

"Let's give these two a chance to talk things out, besides I believe Mister Potter is here to see Madame Pomfrey." Dumbledore said the last part so sweetly that England almost gave up right then and there, but then he realized who exactly Dumbledore had mentioned. The blonde man starred wide eyed as with a flick of his wrist Dumbledore revealed a blushing small dark haired boy hiding behind the curtains that gave the beds some privacy.

England felt a pang deep in his chest and a flare of warmth. So close to the boy England could physically feel the waves of his mother's Old Magik radiating off him. All England could really think of for a few seconds were his two boys, Alfred and Matthew, and when they'd still needed him and listened to him. When they were still a family. Harry looked at England startled with big green eyes and England realized his eyes were getting blurry. He looked away quickly, but not before he saw Harry's embarrassment.

"Professor McGonagall sent me." Harry said weakly. Madame Pomfrey hissed slightly and England looked up to see her dragging the boy away. Lupin was shaking his head and muttering as he quickly left the Hospital Wing, apparently deciding to go to the feast and Dumbledore pointed to the door and then at the floor silently informing England he'd wait there. Finally alone England turned towards Prussia with a fury he hadn't truly felt since th Spanish Armada.

"What the bloody hell are you doing here?" England demanded. Prussia's eyes flared at the challenge and he was on his feet before England could react.

"Because some bastard who claims to be a gentleman refused to keep his part of the bargain." Prussia hissed.

"I was inebriated! You can't honestly expect me to be held responsible for what I do under the influence." England countered coldly and almost wished he hadn't. Prussia looked furious and for the first time England remembered that Prussia used to be powerful. And despite his lack of a nation he could seriously injure England in a fight and possibly win.

"You will keep up your end of the bargain Arthur Kirkland or I will make you wish you had never heard of the Kingdom of Prussia." Prussia told him softly in a voice so cold it made England's skin crawl. In all honesty England was mystified. All this fuss because he didn't carry out his end of a bet? A bet that was rigged? That couldn't be all there was to the story.

England narrowed his eye coming to a conclusion. "This isn't because I didn't keep my word you bloody git. This is because you're avoiding something. What is it did you get into a fight with your brother or something?"

"Or something." Prussia replied face going eerily blank, but his eyes dark and surprisingly serious. Suddenly England felt very uncomfortable. This was personal and England did not do personal very well. Especially with nations he didn't know very well despite centuries of knowing each other.

"Listen you did give me your word England and if you really didn't feel honor bound why the hell are you here? Why not ditch me and quit the job?" Prussia said changing the subject. England tried to think of an explanation, but there was some truth to the Prussian's words. England probably wouldn't have come here without Prussia. He might have been curious, but he would have left Harry in Dumbledore's, usually, wise hands. Truth was England was only here because of that bet with Prussia, he might be able to get around the having to have Prussia with him the entire year clause, but to not do any of it, even if he was drunk, would be dishonorable. Plus England really did want to be around people who didn't think he was insane because he thought riding a broom was not only possible, but inspired an internationally popular sport.

"Fine." England snapped, hating himself for giving in, but knowing Prussia wasn't exactly going to leave anyway.

"Good because I already signed a contract with Dumbles." Prussia said with a smirk. "You couldn't have got rid of me anyway, know that that's settled. What do you want kid?" England spun on his heel to find a reluctant Harry Potter approaching.

"Er, that Veela thing can make people attracted to someone wearing it right?" the boy questioned voice sounding unusually high pitched. England instantly understood the implications and was horrified to think of his Savior liking Gilbert Beilschmidt any in way, shape, or form.

"Don't worry kid the Veela hair necklaces get the best of wizards and some witches. If you thought that was bad, just wait until you meet a real Veela." Prussia assured him, sounding annoyingly smug, but almost kind as weird as it was. Harry hesitated.

"So I'm not…?" Harry looked at them uncertainly. Prussia stepped around England and patted the boy's shoulders.

"Calm down kid, you'd know if you were." Prussia assured him with a serious face England couldn't recall ever actually seeing before. Harry relaxed and threw England an embarrassed and slightly pleading look.

"I heard nothing." England assured him blandly. "I've become mysteriously deaf the past few minutes."

Harry grinned and muttered quiet good-byes. The boy was clearly relieved and looked light as a feather. England turned on Prussia the instant the boy was out of hearing.

"You know very well it only attracts those who are already inclined." England told him disapprovingly. Prussia scowled in his direction.

"Well you didn't exactly correct me, besides the kid clearly isn't ready to accept it yet. You have to let them discover it at their own pace. That's how I raised West anyway." Prussia told him cheerfully and threw an arm around his shoulders. "Come on now that we're roomies you need to learn how to appreciate my awesomeness. So lets forget about the whole lying and sneaking into your country thing."

"Roomies!"

…

After the introduction of the new teachers, the student-teacher, and guest speaker Hermione looked over the Great hall carefully. Mr. Kirkland, the new student-teacher, was looking almost as viciously at Gilbert Beilschmidt as Professor Snape was looking at Professor Lupin. Away from the teacher's table Harry was looking unusually happy. Which was making Hermione suspicious.

She had noticed of course that her friend couldn't keep her eyes off Gilbert, Beilschmidt felt awkward as well as Mister so she would settle for his first name until she came up with a proper title, during the train ride. Hermione couldn't say she was surprised. It had become pretty obvious her friend at least noticed boys differently. Even when describing what happened with teenage Voldemort last year Harry had always notably mentioned how attractive and handsome he was. Besides Hermione just knew, she had excellent Gay-dar, a phrase she'd picked up form some cousins who'd studied in America during a college semester. Her mother claimed it came from Hermione being a fourth French. Ignoring the blatant racism in that comment Hermione was starting to wonder if that was true.

Was she the only one who saw Percy and Penelope Clearwater having a thing for each other? And why was it that she knew her friend was gay, or possibly bi, before he did? Not that he appeared to be accepting it she decided. He'd either convinced himself otherwise or had come to terms very quickly in his ten minute trip to the Hospital Wing. Noting Ron was glaring across the way at Draco Malfoy Hermione had to fight the urge to scoff. Any fool could notice the UST between the two boys. Hermione wondered idly how their families would react when the hormones hit. Looking grimly across the Hall Hermione had a different thought. Why was it that the attractive boys, which she actually talked with enough to form a relationship with all liked the same gender she did. Honestly she'd consider Fred and George if she didn't think both of them had a thing for that pretty Chaser Angelina Johnson. That would certainly end badly if one of them didn't find someone else. Sighing again Hermione bemoaned her status as oldest in her house. Knowing the intimate workings of hormonal teenagers while being a hormonal teenager yourself was not fun. Maybe she'd get lucky and Blaise Zabini, one of the only decent Slytherins she'd ever spoken to, would turn out to be straight. Though judging by the looks he was throwing Theodore Nott maybe not.