Harry Potter and all characters, etc. belong to J.K. Rowling, not me.

The Incredible Hulk belongs to Marvel.

Harry's Ultra Large Kind – Chapter 3 – The Hidden Monster

Harry had been enjoying the best summer of his life. For the past three Dursley-free weeks, he'd been staying at the Burrow – Ron's house – and seeing what life in a magical family could be like. He'd joined in with Ron and his siblings, degnoming the garden, along with a few other chores that were much more enjoyable than anything the Dursleys made him do. He'd also completed his Hogwarts homework. However, most of his time was spent either playing Quidditch or swimming in the nearby pond. However, one strange thing was occurring.

A few days after Harry had arrived at the Burrow, a letter for Ron was flown in by a post owl during breakfast, right after Mr. Weasley left for work. He quickly opened it and began reading. He chuckled a bit before saying, "Harry, Hermione's getting all upset that you haven't replied to her letters yet. I'll explain that you've had more important things to do."

"I haven't gotten any letters from her," the Boy-Who-Lived countered. "In fact, I haven't gotten any mail all summer."

"Well," suggested Ron with a grin. "I guess she has finally gone round the twist with all her reading. Maybe she read about a letter in one of her books…"

"That's not funny, Ronald," interrupted Mrs. Weasley. "Harry, are you absolutely certain that you haven't received any letters from her or anyone else?"

"Positive."

"That's very strange. Owls rarely fail to deliver their letters."

"Quite true," agreed Percy. "Even old Errol makes his deliveries."

"Do you think something's stopping…" asked Fred.

"…Harry from getting his letters?" finished George.

"Why not just have Errol deliver a letter for Harry, just to see if owls can find him?" suggested Ginny. About a second later, the girl's face turned redder than her hair and she stared down at her plate.

"Good idea, Ginny," agreed Molly.

They soon tied a letter to Errol, who promptly flew straight to Harry, looking annoyed that he'd been bothered to deliver a letter to someone sitting at the same table as the one who'd sent it.

"Maybe Errol should come…" suggested George, although Harry couldn't tell them apart.

"…from further away," completed Fred.

In order to follow that suggestion, Ginny went to see her friend Luna, promising to send an owl to Harry as soon as she arrived. Three hours later, when the youngest Weasley returned, Harry hadn't received a letter, but the Lovegood owl had returned uninjured and empty-clawed. So far, no one had been able to figure out why Harry wasn't receiving his mail, but several people, including Hagrid, had tried to write him. It was while Harry was drying off from a swim in the pond, on his twelfth birthday, that he found out what was happening with his mail.

-HULK-

Harry was alone in Ron's room, which he'd been sharing, putting on a fresh shirt, when there was a loud 'pop' behind him. He jumped and turned, wishing he'd had his wand on him. Instead, it was closed up in his trunk. What he saw was the strangest looking creature he'd ever encountered, although he would have to admit he'd read about stranger animals in Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. It was very short with big eyes and ears.

Before Harry could say anything, it greeted him. "Hello, Harry Potter, sir. Dobby is so pleased to make your acquaintance. Dobby wishes it wasn't under such dire circumstances." He paused for a moment. "It's hard to explain."

"Why don't you sit down?" asked Harry, who immediately regretted it.

Dobby started crying aloud as he repeated, "Sit down? Sit down?"

"I'm sorry, Dobby. I didn't mean to offend you."

"Offend Dobby, sir? Dobby has heard of your greatness sir, but never has Dobby been asked to sit down by a wizard, like an equal."

"I guess you haven't met many decent wizards then, have you?" asked Harry.

"No, Dobby hasn't. That was a terrible thing to say." Then, suddenly Dobby did something that completely surprised Harry. He picked up an old beater bat that was on the floor and began using it on himself, bloodying, possibly breaking, his nose in the process.

"What are you doing?!" shouted Harry, grabbing the bat from his strange companion.

"Begging your pardon, sir, but Dobby almost spoke ill of his family."

"Your family?"

"House elves like Dobby are bound to serve one family. When Dobby misbehaves, Dobby must punish himself. Dobby will have to slam his head into the oven for visiting Harry Potter, sir, but he must. Dobby must convince Harry Potter not to be going to Hogwarts this year."

"What?"

"There is a plot. Terrible things will be happening."

"What's the plot?"

"Dobby can't say?"

"Who's plotting them?"

"Dobby can't say." It appeared to Harry that the house elf was struggling even to give a non-answer. "Dobby hoped that Harry Potter wouldn't go to Hogwarts if he thought his friends had forgotten him. That's why Dobby has been taking Harry Potter's mail."

"It's you that's been stealing my letters?!" he yelled as the elf produced a stack of mail.

"What's going on in here?" asked Ron as he opened the door, obviously hearing his friend yelling. Dobby snapped his fingers and disappeared.

"I found out what's been happening to my mail."

-HULK-

"So let me get this straight," said Ron after Harry had explained. "Some crazy elf doesn't want you to go to Hogwarts, so he's been stealing all your mail."

"Yeah. He says it'll be dangerous there this year."

"Maybe that Hulk creature from the Quibbler will be there this year," Ron joked.

Harry laughed along with his friend, but he did realize one thing. The Hulk described in the magazine he'd borrowed from Ginny on his first day at the Burrow was in the same area as the troll-like creature that had attacked the Dursley house. Harry didn't consider that a likely coincidence, so he figured there could be some truth to that article.

-HULK-

When they told the other Weasleys about Dobby, Fred and George guessed that some rich kid like Malfoy had sent his elf to scare Harry into not returning to Hogwarts. Molly immediately flooed Dumbledore about it, and he assured her that he'd keep Hogwarts safe this year, like he always did. The Weasley boys and Harry spent the afternoon outside playing Quidditch, and when they returned at dinner time, Harry, who arrived at the house first, walked inside to find the Burrow completely dark.

He, yet again, wished he'd had his wand with him, feeling that something wasn't right. He squinted as he looked around for some clue as to what terrible thing had happened here when suddenly the lights came on and people shouted from both in front of and behind him. "SURPRISE!" Then, there was a flash in his face, which momentarily blinded him.

After he'd blinked rapidly for a few seconds, the photographer came into view. It was a girl about Ginny's age with dirty blonde, waist-length hair and protuberant, silvery grey eyes. She was holding a camera and seemed to have a permanently surprised look on her face.

"Hello," greeted Harry, seemingly mesmerized by the girl in front of him.

"Happy birthday, Harry Potter," the girl replied with a dreamy expression.

"H-H-Harry, this is my f-friend, L-L-Luna L-L-Lovegood," introduced Ginny, nervously. "She asked if she could come to your party."

"I was hoping to get a picture of a wrong-fanged rompter," explained Luna. "They often make appearances at surprise parties."

"Did you get one?" Harry asked, not sure what else to say.

"I think it hid behind you when it saw my camera, so all I got was a picture of you."

"Er…sorry?" he sort of apologized.

"It's all right. Maybe Daddy can use your picture for a Quibbler article. Have you seen any unusual creatures lately?" The girl seemed to be studying him closely. Her expression was one of mild interest, as opposed to her permanently-surprised look.

"No."

"There's more to you than meets the eye, Harry Potter," the girl replied. "I'm not sure what it is, but…"

"Oi! Harry," shouted Ron from across the room. "Open up your presents so we can get to the food!"

"I hope there's pudding," commented Luna, her expression back to normal (for her) as the topic changed.

"Me, too," he replied, before walking over to the table full of presents, grabbing the closest one, a package that had been badly wrapped in bright orange paper. "This one's from Ron," he announced after reading the label. He tore the orange paper to find an orange jersey advertising the Chudley Cannons – the worst team in Quidditch in everyone but Ron's opinion. To his best friend, this was the greatest team in the world. "Thanks, Ron," he said, slipping the jersey over his head with a big smile on his face. This was the first birthday party he'd ever had.

He received gifts from all the Weasleys, although he wasn't sure if he should eat the candy he'd gotten from Fred and George. Ginny had gotten him a box of chocolate frogs, while her parents had given him a sweater. Percy had given him a homework planner. Hermione had sent him a book on common household spells, along with a card that apologized that she couldn't make it because her family was vacationing in Rome.

There was also another small package that appeared to be wrapped in an old Quibbler magazine cover. He realized it was from the girl he'd just met.

"Daddy says not to waste issues that don't sell," she stated as he tore the wrapping apart, revealing his gift. It was a green elastic friendship bracelet that said Fellowship of the Nargles in gold lettering that randomly appeared and disappeared.

"Thank you, Luna," he said, touched that this stranger would give him anything.

She rolled up the sleeve of her shirt a bit to reveal a similar bracelet, only hers was purple. "If you wear it, it'll almost be like we're friends."

"I want to be friends with you, Luna," he replied.

"That's nice," she stated simply before looking at the table with food. "Oh, good. There's pudding."

The rest of the party went very well, with Harry thoroughly enjoying this rare occurrence. A few short weeks later, there was a similar party for Ginny. Before long, it was September 1st – the day to ride the Hogwarts Express to school.

-HULK-

Chapter end