A/N: eeeeep :D
I went to bed a little while after I posted the first chapter thinking "yeah this isn't going to get anything" and then I wake up with a couple reviews and favorites and even some followers! Also- Mr. Mr. Hemmed's class, thank you so much! Wow, I honestly didn't even know what to say to that. I hope I don't dissapoint!
Thank you so much guys, you don't even understand how happy you made me. I already love you all! 3
I tried to stop. I tried not to doodle our names together in little hearts on my notebooks or think about being "John Strider." I tried not to notice the way the muscles in his arms flexed as he wrote down the equations in math. Alas, it was way too late. I couldn't keep the feelings or the thoughts away. So I decided to just give in.
Accepting it all was easier than I thought. Once I told myself it was totally okay to like a guy, it wasn't so hard to deal with.
One thing that fueled my gay crush on Dave was that I felt like he wanted me to. Part of me said pffff yeah right. You're a fucking dork, why would he like you? But on the other hand, when I really thought about it, he started it all. He got me interested. He was the one who suggested "fake dating," and he'd been making moves on me even before that.
But then again, I realized that I couldn't remember a time when things weren't intimate. Maybe Dave had felt the way I was feeling all along? Maybe I just didn't notice?
That's when all the hope rushed in. It wasn't just a little fantasy crush, it had the possibility of becoming reality. Once I felt like it could happen, I started to think that flirting was a good way to figure everything out, so I tried to think of ways to make it known that I really liked him back without saying anything, in case I was wrong and he didn't like me at all. So I thought of a stupid little plan, which turned into what, to be honest, quite possibly could have been the most embarrassing thing I'd ever done, besides backing up into a table and falling on my ass when Vriska tried to kiss me.
It was a typical Saturday night at Dave's apartment. After several hours of pizza and video games, we decided that we were both tired enough to calm down and watch a movie. When the movies came, so did the chance to flirt my ass off, so I silently hoped for the best and gave it a shot.
"Dave, I'm cold." My head was lying on top of his shoulder, my eyes closed in quiet contentment.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
At that, I felt his arms wrap around my shoulders, pulling me in closer to him. He gently caressed my arm with his thumb, nuzzling his face into my hair. My cheeks instantly flushed, and I buried my face in his neck to hide it. I took his hand and laced our fingers together, sighing happily and cuddling closer.
"Feel a little better, kiddo?"
I looked up at him, a derpy grin painted onto my lips. "A little."
I glanced up at his face, letting go of any sanity still left inside of me, and asked the question that I had mulled over for three days straight. "Hey Dave?" I braced myself for any reaction he could possibly have, drawing in a deep breath. "What if I'm a really bad kisser?" I felt my cheeks get hot as I stared at his gorgeous face, now looking slightly amused. He gave me a puzzled look: eyebrow raised, lips forming a slight smirk. It took all I had not to say "never mind." There was no going back now.
He chuckled softly, gently squeezing my hand.
"What? Why? John Egbert, you win the most random question of the year award. Good fucking job," he laughed, and I squirmed desperately for an explanation, all plans that I previously had seeping down the drain.
"Because like, uh, like what if a girl likes me someday or sometime soon or something and uh, she kisses me and I'm really bad at it and she drops my ass on the side of the road because of it?" I managed to stutter out an answer, but not before he started to laugh at me. My face grew hotter and I could feel the tears prickling in my eyes, threatening to spill over. This so wasn't the way I wanted it to go.
I guessed he could see how upset I had become, immediately stopping his giggle fit and scooping me into his lap. He rocked me back and forth like a baby, and it was strangely comforting.
"Hey, John, no, don't cry. Shhh, it's okay. I'm not laughing at you John. You're just way too adorable for me to handle sometimes and it makes me laugh. Like when a little kid gets cake all over their face and you laugh. It's not laughing at them; it's laughing because they're cute, y'know?" I felt the blood rushing to the tips of my ears and as I buried my face in Dave's chest. "But hey, don't worry John. I'm sure you're a great kisser."
"…Really?" Now we were getting somewhere. "I mean like, I just don't really know, and I wish I could practice or something…" I gently squeezed his hand back, cuddling into him. I yawned quietly, wrapping my arns loosely around his neck.
"Mhm. I'd help you out with that, but you sound exhausted." He grabbed a blanket from the opposite end of the couch, draping it around us and holding me close to his chest. I suddenly didn't even care that my "plan" to get a kiss from him failed so horribly. It all ended with being in his arms, and that's really all that mattered to me at that moment.
But damn, I wanted a kiss.