Castiel glanced at both brothers, one by one. In his eyes was a strange glint. His mouth curled into a sneer but it didn't look like a normal grin. Although, the man was obviously relieved he'd found a possibility to survive this sickness. But what he just had said to both Winchesters, it wasn't something to be proud of. This wasn't funny.

But, they forgave his misplaced smirk, of course. Apparently, the angel still had a lot to learn about people's 'feelings' and their many 'facial expressions'.

"I have to do what?" Dean stammered, shockingly.

The angel looked at him in astonishment.

"To cut off my wings."

"What?!" Dean cried out in disbelieve.

And Cas simply wanted to answer him once more, figuring that he still talked too soft for Dean to hear him clearly. But he was cut off by an angry growl.

"Hell no! Are you crazy?" Dean yelled. He couldn't believe what Castiel said.

"No, Dean. At least not at the moment." Castiel glanced at him, searchingly. He didn't quite understand why Dean was so upset, right now. First he wanted to do anything to save him. He even stroked his hair to calm him. It was so nice of him. And now… he was angry because he offered him another option. The best one, actually. The only option Cas could think of right now.

Unconsciously Castiel softly grasped his clammy hair by the lack of Dean's soft stroking movements.

"I don't understand, Dean. Why are you mad at me?" he asked confused. "I ... it's the only way to..." His words were cut off by a nasty coughing fit. It was strange to remember something now, of what Dean had taught him, this morning. It was a small gesture of human manners.

'Cas ... for God's sake! If you're gonna sneeze or cough, you will hold your freaking fist in front of you' re mouth, man.'

And Castiel followed this order automatically. Blood spurted on his outstretched hand.

Without words Dean firmly grasped the angel by his limp shoulders while Sam grabbed the wet white towel. After wringing the cloth ones, Shockingly, Sam stared at the crimson red, painting his fingers and palm. Then he started wiping it off from Cas's shaking hand. After that he continued whipping his mouth and chin. By the time the angel was clean again, the white towel had changed into a pinkish color. Uncomfortably, Sam dumped the cloth back in the bowl of water. Afterwards, Castiel licked his lips and swallowed hard at the coppery tasted of his own blood. He felt terrible.

This terrifying scene caused a long silence. Apparently the brothers finally realized that Castiel's vessel was about to die. And that the angel would no longer be in control of this body, nor be able to be in their presents on this dimension on Earth. There was no other vessel left for him. He was cut off from heaven. Castiel would be nothing more than forgotten energy. A lost white light, that didn't even belong on earth. Dean sighed. His gaze was softened. He felt so useless.

"Cas. You cannot ask us to torture you, like that. Not too Sam. Not too me. Cut off your wings? Jesus, Cas. That's a horrible thing to do. Even if you were my enemy, I wouldn't do that to an angel." Castiel was still staring at his palm and swallowed hard, again. "And what… if I was Lucifer?" he asked weakly. Dean snorted.

"Don't be like that, Cas. You know I will do anything to safe my brother. And I will do anything to safe yours as well. But… I… I can't do… ya know. This. There has to be another way."

Cas gave a nod.

"... A-allright, Dean ... I understand ..." gasped the angel weak and gloomy. His hand trembled hard. When he finally looked up at Dean, his eyes were darkened with severity. Dean couldn't speak anymore. He felt so bad for the guy. And maybe a little guilty too. Castiel's shoulders hung limp forward, now. He was about to fall asleep. This conversation had coasted him a lot of energy.

"I just… wanted to stay here with you and Sam. But I-I… understand how hard it must be… to do this one thing for me. It will hurt a lot," whispered Cas, weakened by sleep. And if it wasn't bad enough already, the angel started to cough again. Even worse, this time. Blood splattered against Dean's cheek and partly a front of Castiel onto the mattress.

"Wow, Cas," Dean yelled. His whole body was taut with everything that happened. Dean was freaked out about the whole situation but he also felt that he doesn't want to lose his best friend. Cas had done too much for them. He wanted him to be okay. But he doesn't want to cut off his wings. Hell no!

"Calm down, buddy! Take a deep breath. You ain't gonna go bye bye that easily, Cas. We don't want you to go. And of course, we want you to stay with us. We just have to find another way to safe you. That's all. Cut your goddamn wings off, My ass. We'll find another way! Right, Sammy?" Dean looked at his younger brother, ardently. Sam's eyes were still glued on to the limp form.

"No other way…" the angel whimpered weak.

"Cas ... Hey, Cas. Dean is right, man. Have some faith, okay? Aren't angels all about faith?... We'll figure something out. If there isn't another way I will help you to do this, myself. I promise. In the meantime you could get some rest. Have some sleep. While you rest, we can call Bobby. There must be another solution, alright?"

Sam was sure of himself. But the slightly scared undertone in his voice told Castiel that the younger Winchester was holding something back for him. Anyway, he was too tired to care about that now. He wanted nothing more than sleep. He knew that was a bad sigh. The angel also knew that what he'd asked from Dean to do, it was too much to ask. It would be painful. He might even still die from this.

He couldn't ask this from the older Winchester. He was a friend. It will hurt them both. What was he thinking! Cas let out a deep sigh. His eyes started to droop.

It still was the best option, though. It was his choice. If he wanted this to happen, he had to do it by himself!

"Cas?" Dean asked again. He sounded as if he had called him several times. His heavy eyelids cracked open. Castiel seemed almost a little aloof, Dean thought. His whole attitude changed along with his blank gaze. As if he was planning some kind of sneaky con. "You gonna sleep?" Dean asked a little confused by his weird gaze.

Castiel nodded blankly at Dean. A few drops of coughed up blood dripped down from his lip. Then, he finally collapsed deeper onto his mattress. Without words the Winchesters helped the angel on his back.

"Alright. I will rest ... B-but please, Sam, can I have something for the pain? And a little water?" he almost pleaded.

Sam blinked. He had bought some stuff for Cas. He just hadn't got the time to give him something, nor mention it to him. Dean must've told him he had something to ease the pain, earlier. With a nod he walked into the kitchen and began to rummage in the paper bag. Meanwhile, the angel looked deep into Dean's eyes. His gaze was so somber and serious that Dean almost thought the angel wanted to signal him something. Dean didn't quite understand what just happened, but hadn't much time to figure it out because the stern gaze of the angel faded quickly, again. Although, Dean now felt that there was something going on in the angel's head.

The evening began to approach and Bobby had called with the news that he hadn't found something, yet. Meanwhile, the angel was sunken into a deep sleep. Apparently, the medication had a great effect on him. Greater than it would have been, if he was still at his full strength.

His fever had finally dropped a bit to 100 degrees. And that nasty rosy glow on his cheeks had disappeared completely. But, now that Castiel had lost so much blood, it was possible that the angel could go into shock, again. It was for the best that the angel stayed in this deep sleep, tonight.

In the morning they would have to come up with an idea. Otherwise it was probably the end for their surrogate brother.

It had been a terrible day. Either way, the next would be far more worse.

Sam was so exhausted, despite his concern for Cas that he fell asleep in an odd position of the free bed, beside the occupied one, next to him. Dean sat at the kitchen table. He wanted to find a solution on the net, so badly. He stayed there the whole night. Looking under every stone he would come across. But eventually his head dropped on to the keyboard.

He was so eager to find a solution to help his best friend, while it was quite logical that the answers aren't actually on the net.

And finally his light went out, too.

Everything was quiet. Everything was peaceful.

And that was the moment when the angel chose to open his eyes, again.

It was time.

...

In the early morning, Dean was startled awake. At first he didn't know why, but when he felt a gust of cold wind brushing his neck he figured it out.

"Aw man… who let the door open? Its freaking cold outside." A shiver ran down his spine and he lifted his head from the keyboard. Immediately regretted the fact that he had fallen asleep. In the black screen of the laptop he could see the square forms from were the keyboard buttons had pressed in his cheek. He looked down right ridiculous. Moaning of the stiffness in his body he straightened his back. Some vertebrae cracked audibly in that movement. After thinking for some time why he was awake, again, Dean looked around sleepily. The door was open? Why the hell was the door open?

"Sam?"

Suddenly a number of images popped in to his head. He saw the weeping willow where they had been sitting under that afternoon. And he saw the white moonlight shimmer on the blackened water. What was that? Dean gasped in some cold air. Something was going on, over there!

"What the hell," he muttered alienated. He needed a few seconds to see the seriousness of all of this. But when he realized what he just saw in his head he shot up, so fast, that the wooden chair fell backwards behind him and bounced on the floor. In a jerk Dean turned around to face the bed where Sam was still sleeping. Fortunately his brother was okay. His head had completely disappeared under the blanket. Probably he'd felt the cold too. But when he looked at the other bed, he felt his heart skip a beat. The bed where the angel was supposed to be, was now empty! That's what he thought!

"Sam ... Sam wake up," he cried out. His brain tried to thunderbolt an explanation what was going on. And how the hell he did get away.

"Sam ... Cas is gone." With one hand he smacked one foot, that bungled over the edge of the bed, to wake his brother. Man, his brother was so big. He even didn't fit on a normal sized bed.

Sam looked sleepily up from his pillow and within two seconds he'd managed to get out of bed and understand immediately what was going on.

"What?... How?"

Meanwhile, Dean had found the empty paper medicine bag on the ground and held it up, frowning. Sam adopted it his frown and moaned.

"Oh no! He's gonna do it. By himself." With a grunt the younger Winchester pooled his hand through his luscious hair.

"I know, Sam. That stupid son of a bitch is going to kill himself!" With an angry growl Dean grabbed his car keys and took his coat from the rack before he walked through the already opened door.

"Dean, what are you doing?" Sam asked hastily. Meanwhile he was rushing himself in to his shoes.

"What does it look like, moron! I am going to safe Cas. Come on man, I know where he is," Dean yelled. Sam obviously knew that already. But he didn't quite understand one little thing.

"Dean? How do you know where he is?" Dean's eyes fluttered a moment.

"I… I think I saw it. In my head. Just like one of your visions, ya know? Enough chitchat, Sam. We have to go quick." Sam looked at his brother with an aw-like face. Dean walked out of the motelroom, hiding his own stunned face from his younger brother.

"He is back to that place at the water. I'm sure. And ... and if he succeeded ... with cutting off his wings and all… We have to find him in time, Sammy. If he is human, he needs a doctor."

…

A/N: thanks for reading. bla bla bla Review bla bla.;)