Heya friends.
This is a bit belated, but I had some Mother's Day inspiration and had to get this little thingy out of my system. It's a bit more angsty than I'd originally planned but, tis my curse, I suppose.
As always, I disclaim TWD and hope ya'll enjoy!
She held the girl close, butt going numb and her feet pressed into the linked metal of the catwalk fencing. Her rifle stood propped just beside her, Judith's makeshift carriage pressed against the opposite hip.
It was sunrise.
Carol watched the pink streak across the sky above the prison, felt the warm wind that rustled the woods outside the perimeter. She wasn't on watch duty that morning, nor was she tasked with giving the baby her morning bottle.
Daryl roamed the grounds while the Rick got his first decent rest since taking in the Woodbury residents, and Carol had heard him exit the cell they now shared, his attempts at being silent and stealthy failing mostly due to the rattle of the bow against his back.
She had coaxed a groggy Maggie back to bed and taken Judith voluntarily, sneaking out with her several minutes after Daryl had started his rounds outside.
The sun was blazing over the tree line as the girl sucked down her breakfast, and Carol hummed quietly to her even as the quiet, steady tap of familiar boots on concrete met her ears from below the cage. She stopped humming and shifted enough to peer down and meet Daryl's curious gaze.
"What're ya doin'?"
Judith garbled in her arms at the sound of Daryl's voice, and Carol pulled the bottle away to find it nearly empty.
"Just…gettin' fresh air."
His eyes narrowed up at her and then dropped as he seemed to look ahead at the yard before them, the sun highlighting the patchwork of repairs they'd done since the Governor's attack.
"Oughta not be out here alone…."
"I could say the same to you."
She saw him look around, eyes narrowing before looking back up and shrugging.
"That Tyreese guy is around here somewhere too, probably around back checkin' the perimeter…" He trailed, craning his neck as he stepped beneath the catwalk and came to her front,
"Wasn't it Maggie's turn to be up with her this mornin'?"
Carol nodded quietly. Daryl had been helping assign the group tasks for the week, doing just about anything and everything in his power to help take some of the pressure off of Rick. While the man was admittedly doing much better in terms of….personal stability, they all worried about the amount of stress the sudden responsibility of taking in a dozen more mouths to feed could cause.
Rick was a strong man. But he couldn't shoulder everything alone.
Carol felt her brows furrow when Daryl suddenly started walking away, disappearing through one of the side doors without a word. It only took a moment of silent waiting to hear him closing in on the upper door that led out to the cage, and she settled back a bit, Judith cooing quietly in her arms as she watched the door open and the man stride into her private little morning hideaway with a hesitant nod.
She smiled, welcoming, and Daryl closed the door behind him, pulling the bow from his back and coming to peer down at the rifle beside her.
He stood almost awkwardly a moment, looking down at her, before gesturing to the gun,
"Mind if-?"
Carol shook her head, hands full with the baby. She almost moved to put Judith in the carrier to move her gun for him but Daryl's quick, assuring movements stilled her. She watched him move the rifle to the opposite fence across from them, setting his bow down beside it.
With a small, sharp grunt he slid to his ass next to her and leaned back against the fence.
Looked over at her and then down at the baby, an openly curious expression on his face,
"So whatcha doing up this mornin'? Tomorrow is yer day to get up with Lil' Asskicker, ain't it?"
Carol shifted next to him, instantly recognizing the way Daryl's arms moved toward her own, his hands opening in silent request. As she handed Judith over to him, she smiled wide. It was always a heart-warming sight watching him with the girl, seeing his entire body relax in a sudden quiet, calming moment that nothing else could create, seeing his arms shift the weight of the baby so gently, the way his head bobbed down to peer down at her with a pride that just bordered on the fatherly.
Free of Judith for the moment, Carol took the opportunity to stretch her back, stealing Daryl's attention from the girl as his head jerked up and his eyes locked onto her, watching her movements as she arched her back and raised her arms into the air above her.
"I just…ah…you know, it's really silly, Daryl. It really is." She breathed out as she settled back down beside him, and Daryl seemed to huff, the openness in his eyes shading over a bit as he suddenly grew visibly worried.
She frowned slightly at his reaction. She wasn't normally one to keep things from him, and he knew it. But this…
Daryl played with Judith's little fingers absently as he caught her gaze and held it, silently prompting her.
Carol sighed. Smiled despite the slow churning in her gut.
"I was helping Hershel work out the date last night. Get a better bead on the seasons and all."
Daryl nodded, peering up at the still rising sun.
"Heat's settled in pretty regular now. Pretty obvious it's summertime. No more chill in the air, not even at dusk…"
Carol nodded in agreement. "Right. So, we're thinkin' July? Maybe August?"
"Probably. Sounds about right…"
Carol sighed, smile twitching at the corners of her mouth. She wouldn't tell Daryl that she was trying to smile to keep from crying, but the man knew her well. Too well. As he trailed off he bent his head to catch her eyes again,
"So-?"
She exhaled. Nodded down at the little one in his arms.
"Judith was born then…around May, we're thinking." A tear crept to the corner of her eyes despite it all, and Carol muttered a near-silent curse as she dipped her head away from Daryl's piercing blue-green orbs. When she didn't continue she heard him move, reaching across her lap with one hand to pull Judith's carrier across the concrete flooring toward him, moving to set the baby inside in front of them.
She watched him, head down, as he scooted the girl to side and reached over to lay a hand on her bicep.
"Carol."
She sniffed. Breathed in deep and looked up at him.
Her voice was harsh and clear, tinged with an unexpected anger,
"She was born sometime around Mother's Day Daryl." When he looked at her blankly, eyes narrowing into hers as he tried to process what she was trying to say, she shook her head, lips pressing together tight before she nodded down to the child,
"Lori died near Mother's Day. It just—the moment I put it together I felt like someone had punched me in the gut. I couldn't sleep last night…"
Daryl broke eye contact and blinked towards the trees,
"Thought I heard you shiftin' a lot…" Carol caught the quiet darkening of his demeanor and she moved her hand to his, clasping it tightly, returning his attention to the moment.
"I didn't want to bother anyone with something that….can't be helped. But when I heard Maggie getting up this morning to sit with Judith I just had to—"
"Don't worry 'bout that. Maggie can take tomorra's shift…" Squeezing her hand Daryl seemed to lean closer, head bending down to study her face,
"It ain't fair, I know. It ain't fair for Lori to never see her kid and it ain't fair for you to hafta—"He stopped short, a pained blink in his eyes as his lips suddenly froze and drew thin.
Carol smiled sadly at him.
"Lose mine."
He broke eye contact again when she finished his sentence for him.
Carol slid forward quietly, tugging at Daryl's hand and when he complied she dipped her head into his chest, felt his free hand wrap around her back and settle there, hesitant but unmoving.
She did not cry. Daryl's steady breathing against her ear stilled the pain in her chest and she mumbled into his shirt,
"Judith will never have a mother. Not really. But this mornin' I just…needed to feel like one again. Does that make sense?"
She waited, felt him exhale into her hair before his shoulders lifted just an inch.
He was shrugging.
She almost laughed.
Instead, she pulled back to look up at him. He was blinking warily down at her, and he breathed out, unsure,
"I uh…I guess it does."
Carol grinned. Shook her head in correction,
"No it doesn't."
When he sighed in exasperation she did laugh, his attempts to keep up with her shifting moods awkward and downright hilarious.
Daryl stood from his place on the cage floor, holding a hand out to her.
Judith had quietly dozed off and Carol glanced at her before reaching up to take the offered hand, feeling his warmth seep into her arm as he tugged her upward.
He didn't let go when she stood firmly next to him, and he didn't look at her. Carol followed his gaze to the sun rising high above the trees and heard him mumble humorously,
"Gonna take me forever to know what to say to make you feel better about shit…"
She felt her chest stir at the almost declarative statement and she fought to keep from flushing, from dipping her head back down or looking over at him to try and read his expression.
She squeezed his hand one good time before letting go to reach down and grab their weapons.
As she handed him his bow, Carol caught the uncertain look in his eyes and chuckled lightly.
"You already do."