Chapter 13: Final words

Groaning, Ichigo awoke. His head hurt and his vision was blurry. The room in front of him spun around, and that's when he realized he was being dragged by his limbs again. He felt cold and tired. What had happened? Where were they taking him?

The Fraccionés dragging him halted in front of a door before stepping inside. The lights were off and he couldn't see anything inside. Was this their cell? The guards dumped him on the floor and he stayed down. The door opened and closed again, leaving him in complete darkness. Groaning, he waited for a while until he felt the dizziness clear, then he turned over on his belly to push himself into a sitting position.

That's when the lights went on and he knew for sure he was back in their cell.

Uryu was lying face-down on the floor! Ichigo snapped wide awake and got on his feet.

"Uryu!" He shouted and dashed towards the other teen. "Uryu! Are you al-"

He stopped abruptly by what he saw and gasped, completely shocked. The Quincy was only wearing scraps of clothing, mostly around his arms, upper-body and his lower legs. His arms were next to his body, one besides his hip, the other near his face. He had bruises, cuts and gashes almost everywhere, including a few deep ones on his back. Blood had spilled from his lips and formed a puddle around his mouth. And… blood was pooling beneath his legs.

"Oh my god…" He gasped, horrified. "W-what… have they done…" He knelt next to the lifeless form of his friend with trembling hands, afraid not to find any pulse on him. Ichigo's heart was pounding so hard he could hear it. Just as his fingertips grazed a pulse point in the boy's neck, he saw him take a small breath. Thank god! He was alive! That relief almost made tears spill from his eyes. Even if he realized the Quincy was far from alright.

Very carefully, Ichigo touched him and turned him over. Without hesitation, he undid the Kosode top of his Shihakusho, to wrap Uryu in it. Noticing the bruises on his ribcage, he sucked in a startled breath. What have they done? The boy's flesh felt heated and Ichigo quickly placed a hand on his forehead. His heart froze. Uryu had a high fever! He knew it had been bound to happen, but with the shots Szayelaporro gave him, he'd hoped it wouldn't come to this…

"Fuck!" He shouted and jumped up again, facing one of the camera's. "Szayelaporro, I know you're watching us! The Quincy has a fever! He needs your medication. Right now!" He waited for a while, his heartbeat picking up fast, but nothing happened.

"Please! I'll do anything you want." He begged and waited again, but the cell stayed quiet.

"Y-you still need him… r-right?" Ichigo's voice broke on that last word as desperation gripped his throat and realization dawned upon him.

"No, no, no, no…" He chanted. No, it couldn't be that the Quincy's part in all of this was over. It couldn't. He needed him! He had to stay alive.

Ichigo sat down onto the floor and drew Uryu into his lap. Gently cradling him against his chest, careful not to hurt him, while smearing his blood over his bare torso and arms. It was gonna be alright, he told himself. Uryu was a strong fighter, a Quincy. He was going to make it. See, Uryu seemed to be able to breathe a little better in this position.

Then why did his heart fill with dread? The thought of losing him was so hard, it made tears prickle in the back of his eyes.

He looked around for the water bowl, but spotted it shattered on the floor. What had happened while he was unconscious? He didn't remember a thing since Uryu kissed him and tried to protect him from the guards. With a piece of fabric, he wiped the blood from Uryu's pale face, only now realizing he wasn't wearing his glasses. His searching gaze found them shattered on the other side of the cell.

He knew he should've retrieved some clean sheets of toilet paper to dab some of the larger wounds on his body, but right now, he couldn't bear to part from the archer. As he gently wiped the plastered hair out of his face, Uryu's features stirred and it seemed he was coming to.

"Uryu!" He shouted, so happy to see his blue eyes open, albeit looking weary and in pain. When the look on the Quincy's face turned into terror, he quickly spoke their safe word.

"Kanae! It's me, Ichigo! Don't be afraid." That was easy for him to say, off course, even if he knew the other teen had just gone through a horrible experience again, and he had lost his glasses. Ichigo didn't even know how much the Quincy could see without them. Suddenly, his heart leapt as Uryu tried to give him a small smile.

"I-I…chi…go?" He rasped.

"Yes, it's me, Uryu!"

"Ichi…go…" The Quincy coughed up more blood, that slowly trickled from his lips, making Ichigo's gut fill with worry. Ichigo wanted to ask him so many questions, but refrained when he saw the look on his friends face. His questions could wait, as it seemed Uryu wanted to try and say something. For some reason, the atmosphere in their cell changed and suddenly felt very heavy loaded.

Crimson stained lips curved into a smile, while Uryu's eyes filled with tears. He lifted his trembling right hand and tried to touch the Substitute's cheek, but failed. Ichigo realized he missed his face because of the absence of his glasses and guided his hand to the right spot, pressing his palm to his warm cheek.

"It's alright, Uryu. I'm here now and I'm going to help you." He was lying, but what else could he say?

"Ichi…go… I… I…" Hot tears started running from the Quincy's unfocussed eyes while still smiling faintly. Desperation darkened his pale features and he averted his gaze for a second, seeming to think his next words over carefully. It was obviously very difficult for him to continue, as he seemed to force his next words out of his mouth, but Ichigo didn't understand at that point if it was from pain, exhaustion, or simply because of the weight those words carried.

"I…chi…go… I… I… lo…ve… you…" He sobbed, voice breaking. A dark, crimson blush spread over his cheeks. "I… lo…ve… you…"

The Substitute's eyes went wide and he took a quivering breath. He couldn't possibly have heard that correctly, could he? I love you… The poor boy must be delirious. With the temperature he had it wasn't all that strange to say weird things. Nonetheless, his heart was racing and he didn't know why.

He was just gaping at the Quincy in his arms, as Uryu caressed his cheek, to end up placing his hand on the back of his neck and felt him tug forwards. Ichigo complied and moved his head towards him in the belief the other boy was going to whisper something. Watching the Quincy intently, he wasn't so stupid to miss that amorous expression Uryu gave him, before shyly moving his head towards him and bringing their lips together in a soft kiss.

There was warm pressure and softness, mixed with Uryu's tears and the coppery tang of blood. It only lasted for a few moments, but when he pulled away, the Quincy was still smiling at him. Ichigo was too flabbergasted to do or say anything! His eyes were on Uryu the whole time and his heart was pounding in his chest.

"Uryu… H-hang in there…" Was the only reply Ichigo could manage. His mind working overtime and his heart ready to give. "I-I'll help you…" He clasped the Quincy's hand and intertwined their fingers, like he'd done so many times before to encourage him. Then, he saw Uryu's eyes half-lidding and knew he was about to pass out again.

Before Ichigo could say anything, he heard applause and his guard slammed up immediately.

"Why hello, Shinigami Substitute." He heard the sickening honey-coated voice of Szayelaporro. "How are you feeling?"

Ichigo carefully laid the Quincy down and went to stand in front of him protectively, turning towards the pink-haired freak on the screen.

"Fuck you!" He spat. "What have you done to Uryu?"

"Why, I haven't done anything to him." The Espada crooned. "Always taking out your frustration on me when I only have your best interest at heart." The freak laced his fingers together and gave him a toothy smile.

"Oh yeah? Then bring us some water and give him antibiotics."

The Espada laughed. "You didn't say the magic word."

Without any hesitation, Ichigo replied: "Please…" Szayelaporro laughed tauntingly at that, but the Substitute didn't relent. "Please, I'll do anything-"

"Yes, I know. The Quincy can be proud of himself. Managing to ensnare you like that." The Espada purred, slanting his eyes. "Unfortunately, your girlfriend has fulfilled… his purpose."

Ichigo had already dreaded this, but to have it thrown in his face like that obliterated his last shred of hope. It made his heart stop.

"H-his purpose?" He repeated with wavery voice.

"Yes, I have no more need for him. I had already warned you of his inevitable demise here, did I not?" Szayelaporro purred. "Then, why are you so surprised, Kurosaki Ichigo?"

"Shut up!" Ichigo countered. This couldn't be happening. Uryu had a high fever and was not going to win this battle without medication, and he would be helpless and useless in all of this. Which was probably exactly how that freak wanted him to feel… "W-what have you done to him?"

"Like I said, I haven't done anything to him." Szayelaporro laughed. "But his part ended right here in this cell! His final act was only mildly entertaining, though. I had expected more of him, but-"

"Stop your bullshit and tell me the truth!" Ichigo made fists so hard his knuckles went white.

"Oh, are you already up for the truth? How marvelous!" The Espada sang and clapped his hands. Ichigo could hear Uryu gurgle behind him, but kept his attention on the screen. He'd already seen what that pink-haired moron was capable off and wasn't taking any chances with him right now. "Just sit back and relax, Kurosaki Ichigo. I'll show you exactly what happened in this cell, what happened to your girlfriend."

"Show me!" Ichigo shouted, but the way Szayelaporro was acting only made him suspect the worst. Why was he being so compliant all of a sudden? Suddenly, the Substitute felt tugging at the back of his Hakama and watched down. Uryu was trying to get his attention.

"Do…n't… look…" He rasped, his eyes hazy and almost closed. Ichigo quickly crouched besides him, while he heard the maniacal laughter of the Espada erupt from the screen. "Do…n't… look…" Uryu repeated.

"Don't look? You don't want me to see what happened?" The look Uryu gave him said it all.

"P-pl…ea…se…" The Quincy tried with a faint voice, before coughing up blood and wheezing. He'd obviously overexerted himself.

"Uryu, I'm sorry, but I really need to know what that bastard has done to you." Uryu gave him a desperate look, before his right hand dropped to the floor and his eyes slid completely shut. Ichigo growled out of concern, before turning towards the screen again. "Show me!"

"Gladly." The Espada purred and gave him a dark grin. "You might want to sit down, though."

Without further ado, the footage of the incident started on the screen.

Ichigo could see himself transform into his Vasto Lorde form and inhaled sharply. He'd never known how he'd looked that day he vanquished Ulquiorra. He'd only had Orihime's and Uryu's stories to go by. But seeing himself with those horns, that hole in his sternum and that Hollow mask, filled his gut with dread.

As he saw Uryu scream in panic, he felt his palms become damp already. Szayelaporro gave the command and he felt cold sweat break out on his forehead. Dear god, he thought, please tell me I didn't…

His heart was pounding in his chest as he watched how the Uryu on screen tried to fight that monster. Him! He buried his nails into his palms, drawing blood, and felt his head spin more and more as he witnessed how he snapped the Quincy's wrist and cracked his ribs.

Then the floor dropped out from under him as he heard the Espada give the next command: "Fuck him."

"Oh my god…" Ichigo stuttered while he threw his hands in front of his face. "Please, have mercy on him… On the both of us… Please…" His voice broke and he took a wavery breath, just to prevent his lungs from giving out.

He heard the creature shout "Mate!" and "Fuck!" towards Uryu and watched him break his leg. This couldn't be happening! Ichigo clamped a hand over his mouth and kept praying for a miracle that would come and save Uryu from that creature.

He felt his heart freeze at the sight of the Quincy's tears and… As he saw the monster violate Uryu, making his scream, Ichigo sank through his knees. Face contorted in utter shock and dread, while grabbing fistfuls of his Shihakusho.

He had done those things to Uryu. He was that monster.

"Stop this…" He muttered, even though he was well aware the Espada wouldn't comply. His eyes darted around the room, from the screen to the Quincy and back. He didn't want to watch this anymore, but at the same time he needed to know what had happened. He needed to know the extent of what he had done to his friend.

Then, the sugar-coated voice of Szayelaporro on screen drew his attention.

"While you're fucking him nice and good, he actually wants someone else. He's a whore. You should punish him."

His eyes were instantly glued back on the screen, as he realized the filthy Espada had just upped the stakes and Uryu was going to pay the price…

Ichigo watched in horror as the beast slammed Uryu against the wall, spread his knees wide and forcefully took him a second time, while shouting:

"Whore! Fuck hard! Whore!"

"Dear god, please make it stop…" He pleaded. Feeling his blood boil, while his heart remained stone cold, still clutching his Shihakusho feverishly. He saw Uryu spout blood over the creature's chest and heard him beg:

"Ichi…go… p-pl…ease…"

His heart broke. He couldn't take this anymore and screamed:

"Szayelaporro! You fucking bastard!" Throwing an angry punch at the floor beneath him, while remaining on his knees. He couldn't even start to imagine what it must have been like for the Quincy… but, the sounds the other boy was making on screen drew his attention back towards the horrendous movie. The proof of what he had done!

Ichigo watched horrified how the creature tried choking the Quincy. Watched how Uryu tried his best to struggle, and felt his heart throb hard in his throat the moment he saw him giving up. Saw the fire go out in his sapphire eyes…

"Stop this!" He shouted. "Why did you make me do this?"

The images in front of him spoke for themselves, and as they continued to harass him, his devastation rose. There was no denying anything, he was guilty. By the time he saw himself assaulting Uryu, now lying on his belly on the floor, the overload of emotions was sending hard shivers through his body. Then, he heard the Uryu on screen plead once more:

"I…chi…go… P…pl…ease…"

Tears were forming in his eyes and he clasped his hands in front of his mouth again, as if trying to contain the sobs that started rolling from his trembling lips.

This was a nightmare! It couldn't be real! It was a nightmare like the many he'd had before in this wretched place. Soon he'd wake up and Uryu would be weakened and injured from their time in captivity, but not like this. Not reduced to this state where he was barely alive. Where he'd hurt him so much…

Ichigo grasped his head and slanted his eyes that threatened to spill over from misery, but couldn't shut the video out. The sounds the Quincy made as he was raped again, while the creature yelled things like "Punish!" and "Whore!", felt like Zanpakuto's piercing his heart. How much more was there? How on earth had Uryu stayed conscious this whole time? Then he saw the monster finally pull out of the other boy, saying:

"Punished whore. Enough."

Ichigo felt relief start to spread through his body, as he thought it was finally over. Then he witnessed the blood that leaked down Uryu's thighs and it made him so nauseous he clamped his mouth again, trying to keep the bile at bay. Szayelaporro's next words made him immediately glued to the screen again.

"Good boy! Now, mark your whore so he knows he belongs to you!" The Espada on screen crooned while giving the beast a round of applause.

Ichigo's eyes went wide and heavy tremors rocked through his body as he realized what the monster… what he was doing. He was urinating on the Quincy! Humiliating him in the worst possible way, after everything that was already done to him.

"Mark! Whore!"

That look of total defeat Uryu'd given the creature, as he lay there crying and broken, made Ichigo's heart shatter. Tears were streaming down his shocked face as this was more than he could bear. What had he done…

His stomach roiled heavily and he dashed towards the toilet. Throwing up everything he'd had for his last meal, before they'd thrown him back into the cell he had shared with the Quincy. When the rough shivers wracking his body stopped, he wiped his mouth on his sleeve, before strutting towards Uryu on shaky legs.

Tears fell from his eyes onto his friends face as he hovered over him, gently wiping some strands from his forehead. Dear god, how could he ever ask for Uryu's forgiveness? His sobs broke free as he stopped clenching his jaw and he didn't care anymore, he just needed to get this grief, this immense pain, out of his heart.

Careful, he collected the Quincy in his arms and went to sit against the wall. Cradling him softly against his chest, while he didn't stop whispering:

"I'm sorry, Uryu… I'm so sorry…"

Ichigo was chanting that message, trying not to choke on his tears, as he gently caressed Uryu's face and wiped the blood from his lips.

"Please… Please, forgive me…" He cried. "That freak made me do this…"

He brought their foreheads together, as he'd done before, but the Quincy didn't open his blue eyes. Considering the damage he'd dealt to him, it was a miracle he was still alive, but…. Ichigo didn't dare to let his thoughts wander any further in that direction. Uryu had to live! He couldn't bear losing him now. He'd seen him try so hard, fighting for his life, while he'd already been gravely injured. Why was it that he barely had a few bruises while the Quincy always got the bad end of the deal?

Suddenly, he heard a dark chuckle. That stupid Espada! In his sorrow, he'd completely forgotten that freak was still watching them.

"Like what you saw, Kurosaki Ichigo? Or should I play it again?"

"Fuck off, you maniac!" He screamed, watching up at the screen. "Why did you make me do this? Why torture us this way?" His eyes were ablaze and if looks could kill…

"Why? Why, because it's fun off course!" Szayelaporro chirped. "I haven't had so much entertainment in a while and I suspect neither did my predecessor, I suspect! Thanks to you boys!" He clapped in his hands, showing Ichigo a toothy grin.

"Just you wait 'till I get outta here, you asshole!" The Espada laughed again.

"Of course, Shinigami Substitute. But first, there is something important I have to tell you regarding your girlfriend." Ichigo gave him a furious glare.

"You're not taking him from me!" He shouted. "You're not doing anything to him anymore! I'll-"

"Indeed, I won't." Came the flat reply. "During your… enthusiasm… to follow my orders, you've pierced his left lung with one of his broken ribs. Hilarious, really! Hence the reason he can't breathe well."

"W-what?" Croaked the Substitute.

"Well, a collapsed lung is not lethal, more annoying really, but… seeing as he coughed up so much blood, you've probably hit an artery with that rib, too." He laughed sinisterly. "That was more than I asked for, but, hey, I'm not complaining!"

"What does that mean?" Ichigo tightened his hold on the boy in his arms.

"Now really, are all Shinigami's this dumb or is it just you?" Szayelaporro laughed mockingly. Ichigo didn't care, but he already dreaded the answer. It made his chest constrict with anxiety. "It means he's dying." The Espada took his time pronouncing those words and even though Ichigo had already anticipated this, he still felt like the floor dropped out from under him.

"No!" Ichigo yelled. "No! He can't! Tell me what you want from me! Please…" Shamelessly, he begged, while tears of sorrow found their way out again and he was crying hot tears over Uryu's pale features. "I'll do anything… Just keep him alive… Please…" He cradled the Quincy softly again and tried to shut out the dark chuckles of the Espada.

"While that's a very tempting offer, Kurosaki Ichigo, I'm sure you'll do what I want whether your girlfriend dies or not. You better say your goodbye's now… Or pray for a miracle." He laughed again. "Unfortunately, I have more important work to do right now. Seeing as your rampage around my lab was more… destructive… than I thought possible. Tata!"

The screen went off and the lights were dimmed while Ichigo yelled:

"At least give us some water, you dick! Give him a chance, goddamit!"

Ichigo directed his attention back to the unconscious Quincy in his arms and tightened his embrace. Needing to feel his warmth. Needing to hear his heartbeat. The archer's skin was so hot from the fever and he had absolutely nothing to bring it down! He couldn't do anything!

He was as helpless as a baby in this situation. Completely useless. And that freak Espada wanted to destroy him by letting him watch a person he cared for deeply wither away in his arms! He couldn't let that happen! He refused! Uryu was all he had in this place and he…

He was the reason Uryu was dying.

He'd done this.

A hero like him…

That thought brought fresh tears to his eyes and made his throat close up with grief and guilt.

"Please… don't die… on me… Uryu…" He sobbed. "I need you…"

Without thinking, he pressed his lips softly against the other boy's crimson-stained mouth, acting completely on what his heart told him to do. The Quincy had done this twice already to convey words he couldn't say, Ichigo wanted to try the same. When he pulled away from the soft pressure of joined lips, his heart fluttered as he was looking into Uryu's weary, half-lidded eyes. Before he had the chance to shout out his name or say anything at all, the other boy tried tracing the outlines of his cheeks with trembling fingers. Although he must've been hurting like hell right now, the Quincy gave him a faint smile. Uryu kept his eyes on him intently before tenderly joining their lips again.

Ichigo made a startled gasp, but closed his eyes to indulge him. It felt warm and soft and it made the pain in his chest a little less painful. The moment was over all too soon, as Uryu started wheezing again. He tried to say something, his voice barely a whisper.

L-li…ve…" Uryu rasped. "A-and… be… hap…py…"

Why did it sound like the other boy was saying goodbye? It made the Substitute's heart constrict and his throat close with emotion. Then it hit him.

Uryu knew. He knew he was dying. The Quincy was too smart for not having figured this out himself. Ichigo just looked at the boy in his arms in misery while tears spilled from his rich, brown eyes.

"Please… don't give up… Uryu." He cried. "I need you!"

Uryu started coughing again and looked at him warily while blood trickled down his mouth. It looked like he wanted to try speaking again, but Ichigo intervened:

"Shhh." He hushed, while wiping a few stray stands out of his face. "Save your strength."

He felt the soft touches of Uryu who was caressing his cheeks again and Ichigo couldn't take it any longer. His poor heart was going to burst. Here they were, the Quincy he broke was dying in his arms, and the boy was giving him smiles and kisses…

"I'm so sorry… for doing this to you… Uryu." Ichigo sobbed, voice breaking. "I can't even… begin to ask… for your forgiveness, but… please, stay with me."

Uryu slowly moved his lips, trying to say something. Ichigo didn't have the heart to hold him back anymore. The Quincy's eyes were almost completely closed, but the corners of his lips curved again to produce a faint smile.

"…love… you…"

The words were but a faint whisper, and just like before, Ichigo felt a shockwave run through him, and not from that stupid collar! The archer had said "I love you". Again! He'd clearly understood him, no mistake there. It couldn't be a coincidence anymore. What if… What if the words Uryu spoke were true? It couldn't be! The Quincy must be at his limit, mind hazy from the fever and body dying. He could be saying right about anything now… Couldn't he?

But… If it were true… If Uryu loved him, then… It made his heart grow hot and cold at the same time, but he didn't have time to process any of that right now. How could Uryu even say that after what he just did to him? Ichigo sucked in a wavering breath, realizing the cruelty of this whole situation. Did Szayelaporro know?

Uryu caressed his face one more time before his eyes started closing again.

"No!" Icihgo could only watch in panic, utterly helpless, as the Quincy's head lolled to the side. "No!" He wrapped him carefully in his arms again, rocking him while his tears fell relentlessly. "Please, don't die." He whispered. "I'm sorry…"

Ichigo didn't know how long he'd sat there cradling the archer against his chest, but he cried until he was exhausted. One of his hands was on the other boy's chest, continuously monitoring his heartbeat. He did as Szayelaporro had told him, praying for a miracle. Praying for his friends to find them. Praying to the gods, to anybody willing to listen, asking to spare Uryu from this merciless fate.

The Quincy's breaths were becoming shallower, and that realization made Ichigo's chest constrict in despair. He'd tried shouting at him to hold on. He'd tried whispering soft encouragements to him, in the hope he would hear them and try to hold on to life. Unwilling to part from his side, the only thing Ichigo could do was cling to Uryu, while he slowly slipped away…

Suddenly, he faintly heard the sound of an explosion, which made him look up and sideways towards the door. Not much after, a high-pitched sound went off. Like an alarm, blaring annoyingly. More sounds erupted from the hallway. Something was going on, as he heard a lot of commotion and voices outside. He didn't dare to hope anymore. It was bound to be one of Szayelaporro's stupid drills or experiments. He didn't care and just let his head rest onto Uryu's forehead, continuing to sit in silence for a while.

All of a sudden the door to his cell exploded inwards.

That got his attention!

Smoke came from the exploding entry and Ichigo started coughing. Someone was trying to break in from the other side, as there were hard banging noises. As if somebody tried to kick the door out of its hinges.

Before Ichigo had the time to lay Uryu down and jump in front of him, the door crashed down and a figure rushed in.

Ichigo felt his heart skip a beat! He had to be hallucinating again as that figure in front of him, who was looking concerned and shouting things at him, was…

"Renji?"