Ok, now for the stuff that wasn't in the movie! Because I made it up!

Chapter 2: Pointless Priorities

"I can't believe I let him off so easily," the racer muttered to himself as he made his way outside. "I should've made him pay for all the damage he's caused. Oh well." Then he slapped his forehead when he thought of something else. "Argh! I completely forgot about my musical number!"

He had it all planned out: After telling Ralph that he couldn't get his medal back and that Vanellope couldn't race, he was going to do a song-and-dance routine about the way he ruled Sugar Rush. It was something he came up with just in case anyone tried to visit. But then he got distracted with thinking that Ralph was going to take over his game and everything, so he forgot. "And I spent years choreographing it!"

Then again, maybe it would've been too random. It didn't really matter, anyway; Ralph was going back to his game to continue being a loser, and Turbo was finally going to capture Vanellope and put her away like the bug that she was. All he had to do now was, you know, actually find her.

Over the 15 years as King of Sugar Rush, he'd captured Vanellope exactly once. That lasted about 5 minutes, however, as the former princess was able to glitch through the walls of her cell and be out on the open road. Turbo had since crafted a special restraint that would prevent her from using her glitching powers, but he hadn't had a chance to test it out. Vanellope was always evading him.

Turbo came to the start of the main racetrack again and stopped to survey the damage. The citizens were still repairing the stands and themselves, and it looked like they still had a long way to go. As he gazed around, a particularly awful disaster caught his attention.

The large candy mosaic of his King Candy face beside the starting line was now ruined by Ralph's massive footprints.

Turbo gasped and jumped out of his kart. "My face! My beautiful face! NOOOOO!" He whimpered before clenching his fists in anger and turning to the nearest citizen. "You there!" he snapped, pointing.

"Oh!" the Teddy-Bear cookie stood at attention with a quick bow.

"Before you do anything else, fix this tribute to myself!" he commanded. As the cookie hurried to sort the pieces of candy, Turbo added, "And I want it to look exactly like how it was before. Same jolly smile and everything."

The cookie paused to look at him with an apologetically raised brow.

Turbo's face fell and he said dully, "…You don't remember what it looked like, do you?" With a sigh, he rubbed his head. "Ok, well, like this." He put on his brightest grin.

The cookie nodded in understanding and began arranging the pieces on the ground. It frequently kept checking the king to see if it was doing it right.

Still holding the grin, Turbo shifted his eyes and asked through his teeth, "I don't mean to rush you, but could you go a little faster?"

(25 minutes later…)

"…I can't take it anymore…" Turbo moaned, tired from waiting. He was designed to smile all day, but right now he had more important things to do. "Are you finished yet?"

The Teddy-Bear cookie took a final look at its work, then turned to him with a delighted squeal.

"Finally!" Turbo stopped smiling and cracked his back as he stood up. "Now let's see how it looks." He walked over to the mosaic with anticipation, but his eyes bugged out the second he saw it.

It looked like an inflamed alien head with jagged teeth and nightmare-inducing eyes.

"WHAT?! You call this art? It's nearly worse than it was before!" he criticized. Turbo loomed in front of the shaking cookie and sneered, "If you don't find someone who can fix this right now, I will dunk you in a giant glass of milk and eat you piece by piece, hoo-hoo!"

The cookie nodded rapidly and ran off with a terrified yelp.

"Ugh." The racer trudged back to his kart. What a waste of time this was. He started up his vehicle and headed in the direction of his castle. Maybe he would feel better if he just relaxed for a few hours.

Shortly after parking his car in its spot in the throne room, Sour Bill walked in. "Pardon me, King Candy," he droned. "Someone has requested an audience with you."

Turbo groaned and reluctantly walked down the stairs. "It better not be one of those whiny, big-eyed, bratty—"

Taffyta stepped into the room.

"—adorable children!" he finished cheerfully. "Why, if it isn't Taffyta, my favourite racer! Have some candy!" He tossed her a strawberry lollipop, hoping she didn't hear what he said seconds before. It wasn't that he thought she was annoying; it was just a better cover if he pretended to like all the racers. It just so happened that Taffyta was the only one that he could stand.

The blond curtseyed, licked the lollipop and greeted, "Hey, King Candy. I hope I'm not interrupting anything. I know you're very busy…"

"Not at all, my dear," Turbo assured. "So, how can I help you?"

"Actually, I just wanted to tell you something." She smiled confidently. "You don't have to worry about that glitch being in the Random Roster Race anymore."

Turbo perked up at once. "I don't?" He ran up to Taffyta, intrigued. "Ohoho, please do tell."

Taffyta flipped her hair back and explained haughtily, "I led the other racers to the junkyard where Vanellope was. We totally trashed her pathetic kart, so now she has no way of racing." As she finished, she stuck the lollipop in her mouth smugly.

Turbo beamed in delight. This was the best news he'd had all day: the glitch wouldn't race and expose his lie after all! "Splendid!" he exclaimed with a bounce. "I knew I could count on you," he said, pinching her cheek and managing to get a giggle out of her. "So, what did the little glitch have to say after that, hmm?"

For some reason, Taffyta suddenly seemed a little nervous. "Um..." She took the lollipop out of her mouth and focused on it. "Well, see, we didn't actually stick around."

"Oh? Why not?"

"Uh… No reason."

Turbo raised an eyebrow and smiled knowingly. "Taffyta, you know we don't keep secrets from each other."

The girl shuffled her feet. "We left right away because…because I was just dying to come tell you what we did!" she managed with a convincing smile.

"Oh you!" Turbo giggled, patting her strawberry hat. "Well done, my dear." He took out another lollipop and handed it to her. "Here, one for the road."

Taffyta grinned and bowed. "Thank you for your time, King Candy."

"No, thank you," he said, guiding her out the door. "Now run along, my dear. Ta-ta!" He waved as she strutted away, then he shut the door. Turbo leaned against it, sighing in relief. He was still safe. That was the good thing about Taffyta: loyal to the end, but as gullible as the rest of them. He almost felt guilty for taking advantage of her like that, but it was necessary for his plot.

Sour Bill, who Turbo realized was still standing beside the door, asked, "Now that Vanellope can't race, what are you going to do?"

Turbo turned to him with a pleasant smile. "You know, I'm in such a good mood right now, I think I'll pamper myself with a spa treatment!"

Sour Bill cautioned, "Are you sure you want to let your guard down while the glitch is still around?"

"You heard Taffyta: they destroyed her kart, measly as it was. She's probably still crying over the remains," Turbo reasoned.

The green candy still looked unsure. "You know, plans usually backfire when you think they're going well…"

"You're a sour ball, not a fortune cookie!" spat Turbo. "Besides, my feet need to be rested up if they're going to be jamming down on pedals throughout the big race!"

Bill sighed. "I'll get your towel."

"Ahhhhh…" Turbo sighed contently as he sat on the bench and dipped his feet into the warm chocolate mud bath.

Vanellope's castle didn't come equipped with a spa, so Turbo took it upon himself to make one. After all, what's a luxurious palace without a spa?

He closed his eyes and started to hum the Turbo Time theme music. "Da, da-da da, da… Da-da-da S-U-G-A-R, jump into your racing car. Say Sugar—GAH!" Unfortunately it was very hard to get the Sugar Rush theme song out of his head. Just think happy thoughts… Gold trophies. Hot-waxed Turbomobile. Vanellope deleted from the game.

Just then, Wynnchel and Duncan burst through the door. "King Candy!"

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" Turbo screamed, nearly falling into the mud. Clutching the bench, he glared at the donuts and chided, "Don't do that!"

"Forgive us, sir," began Wynnchel hastily. "But we were just told that the glitch is inside the kart bakery."

Turbo leapt off his seat, astonished. "WHAT?! That can't be!" he exclaimed in disbelief. The racer hurried across the floor, leaving chocolate footprints on it, to get changed behind a room divider. "I put real locks on the door! I designed that "No Glitches" sign! There's no way she could've gotten in!" He stammered, frustratingly changing in seconds from a bathrobe to his royal attire, "If she manages to—I will—all the—grrah—pain! Lots of pain!"

When he was done, he jumped into his kart (he liked to drive inside the castle sometimes) and tore out of the spa.

Wynnchel and Duncan exchanged quizzical glances, then shrugged and went after him, leaving Sour Bill to mop the floor by himself.

Fun fact: The musical idea is a reference to the villain song King Candy was supposed to have in an early draft. As for the reason why Taffyta didn't tell him about Ralph scaring them away, it was because she didn't want to look like a coward. And if you don't get the "Pain! Lots of pain!" line, you need to go watch "A Knight's Tale" and prepare to have your mind blown. Right now. After you review, of course.