Dan had faced metal men. He'd somehow survived facing tanks consumed with hatred. Angry potatoes with a taste for battle? Just about managed to stop them. Stone angels that moved if you so much as blinked? The less said about the outcome of that fight, the better. He'd had his back door smashed down by a giant dog from space, and his house had been shrunken to something resembling a kid's toy. On the same day. And yet the sight of a towering green woman clambering up the side of Big Ben, chasing a roaring red monster, was undoubtedly the strangest thing he'd seen. Add to that the fact that a man had turned himself into some sort of hideous lizard, then it was becoming a very peculiar time for the Scouser.

Jennifer was taking the lead in the fight, although it was more of a struggle just to keep up with the crimson hulk as the creature scrambled over the famous landmark. She'd gotten close a few times but, for some reason they couldn't quite make out, whenever she touched their opponent, she was forced to let go almost immediately. She needed help, that was abundantly clear. Blonsky was the ideal candidate to provide that assistance since his stature was comparable, and perhaps greater, than the hulk. Despite that, he was still standing off to one side, occasionally shouting words of encouragement when he felt the team needed it.

Dan had proven more useful than he'd expected, after pleading with Wong to give him something to do. After all, he'd been in perilous situations before without ever having superpowers, so nothing had changed for him. Besides the fact that the Doctor wasn't there to oversee his efforts. The Sorcerer Supreme had been opening a flurry of portals for him and Kamala to jump through, reaching scared onlookers before the hulk could reach them. The London residents seemed to be comforted by his presence, with Dan laying on the charm thick to reassure them. Maybe there were a few attractive women that he didn't mind appearing as the dashing hero in their eyes, but that was obviously just a happy accident.

Moon Knight, in the meantime, was cutting an increasingly frustrated figure. He was used to taking out opponents that would go down after a few punches, or that would tap out as soon as they had some sort of weapon protruding from their chest. No matter what he threw at the rampaging creature, it didn't seem to slow it down, instead only serving to make the hulk even angrier. It was only through his quick manoeuvrability that he'd been able to escape a gigantic red hand from clasping around his cloak, though it had been too close for comfort from the perspective of Steven, who was currently busy screaming at Marc to abort this ridiculous plan.

Jennifer evidently didn't have the same flexibility as the caped crusader, because she was soon sent flying back down to earth. The Hulk had grabbed a hold of her ankle, seeing her as an annoying pest, and flung her from the clock face. With Wong distracted by one of the handles heading straight for an occupied building, generating a portal just in time to direct it to a safer spot, Jennifer was powerless but to land heavily on the concrete. The group let out an audible wince as they watched it happen, quickly moving to the large crater she'd formed upon impact. The green woman was moving perfectly fine thanks to her heightened durability, but they suspected it still hadn't felt particularly good to experience.

"I tell you something, the council aren't going to be happy about fixing what you've just done to their road," Dan commented.

"Screw the council," she replied grumpily, slowly forcing herself up.

"Although there's been so much damage that they probably won't notice the you-shaped hole you made in the tarmac."

Jennifer's glare was terrifying. "I'm feeling a lot of aggression right now, Dan. Don't make me take it out on you."

"Perhaps we should focus on more important matters," Wong suggested hastily, holding up his hands. If She-Hulk started pummelling their perfectly normal teammate, then there was probably not a lot even the sorcerer could do to help him.

"Such as the fact that I can't get anywhere near that thing? The strangest thing is that, when I have been able to grab him, his skin has been painfully hot. I've never known anything like it. That doesn't happen to Bruce. It certainly doesn't happen to me. I'm hot enough as it is." She seemed to do a wink off to one side, though they couldn't tell who she'd been directing it to.

"It might be behind the different pigmentation of his skin. If this Hulk has come from the vast realms of the multiverse, then it's entirely possible that the radiation that fuelled his original metamorphosis was different to the gamma radiation that plagued your cousin. For all we know, it could be a form of radiation that is unlike anything we've seen in this reality."

"Do you ever come up with answers or just increasingly frustrating possibilities?" Marc wondered bitterly. "It'd be helpful if you could work it out, because surely that's the key to stopping him."

"What'd be helpful is if the great big ugly ace up our sleeve was actually joining in with the fight!" Jennifer argued, as she looked over at Emil.

It was a strange sight, with his looming form, to see Blonsky raise his hands in surrender. It was even stranger still to hear his voice, which was pretty much the same as when he was in his human form. "Hey, you know that I'm not one for violence anymore. I've changed. I strive for peace. I'm not going to apologise for sticking to my principles."

"The only way we'll get peace is if we stop that monster. Have you considered that?"

Blonsky hesitated. "That's actually a good point you've raised. I'll understandably have to weigh up the pros and cons of each side of the argument before giving you my answer."

"We don't have time for that! I swear to god, if you don't kick yourself into gear, I'm going to throw you back into that cell so quickly that even Wong's magic won't be able to help you afterwards."

"Alright, alright! Chill out, Walters! I thought we'd discussed some of your anger issues in our group therapy session. Just because we're in a battle, it doesn't mean that it's acceptable to forget those important lessons. Do you need me to run through them again?"

"Utter one line of your haikus and I'll make sure your obituary takes on the same stupid structure."

"If you can't touch him, what do you expect me to do? We're made of the same stuff. I think. I'm sure there's some sort of sciencey mumbo-jumbo that your blasted cousin could bang on about."

"Punch him. Hard. Repeatedly. Preferably in the face. Until he submits."

"That's not exactly a well-thought out plan. What happens if the punching doesn't work?"

"Then you'll probably receive the same treatment, which, frankly, I'm rather excited to see."

"I should have just stayed in my cell. It was a lot more peaceful there, on my own, besides when the ladies came during visiting hours." Was that a wink? Dan couldn't tell when it was on such a grotesque face.

"Yes, you should have," Jennifer snapped. "That's exactly what you should have done. I don't even know what you were thinking, after agreeing so easily to the terms of your second imprisonment."

"I was thinking that I rather liked the taste of freedom I was given. It's like having to go back to cow's milk after experiencing the fresh juice of a yak."

"I think I'm going to be sick," Moon Knight said in response and, for once, they couldn't tell whether it was a sentiment coming from Marc or Steven.

"Anyway, blame him if you're going to be angry at anyone!" Blonsky argued, pointing an accusatory finger at Wong. "I came here under the impression of getting some of that lovely free wifi at Kamar Taj. I didn't ask for this!"

Jennifer folded her arms. "Trust me, I'll be having words with him once this mess is over with."

Wong grimaced at the look he was receiving. "Perhaps we should focus on exactly that: cleaning up the mess before anything too serious happens."

Dan pulled a face. "Mate, if this isn't serious, then I'm not looking forward to seeing what actually is."

There was a flurry of noise up ahead, the beating of wind high above them. They looked up, their expressions turning despairing, as a news helicopter tentatively approached the scene of the attack. Understandably, the hulk was quick to pick up on its presence, growling savagely at the hovering vehicle. At one point, it got slightly too close and the creature's hand only just missed one of its landing skids. The evasive manoeuvre had the unwanted effect of seeing a propeller slice into the arm of the beast, an almighty howl being let loose in response.

"It's a bit like King Kong, isn't it?" Dan said as the scene unfolded. "You know, the monster swatting away at something flying whilst it climbs a recognisable tower." He was met with silence. "Do you…do you not have that film in this universe?"

"We're just struggling to see the bright side of that admittedly excellent and culturally significant movie being replicated," Wong answered. "We need to get that damned helicopter away from it. Don't the pilots know how far a hulk can jump? The things journalists will do for a blasted story."

"I'm on it," Kamala said instantly. "Out of all of us, I'm probably the friendly face they could use right now."

Despite already seeing the young girl's powers in action, Dan was still amazed as she took off. Contorting and stretching her limbs, she was able to swing on a lamppost, in turn using that momentum to propel herself onto one of the nearby buildings. Racing across the rooftops, gradually getting higher, Kamala implemented her growing speed to jump into the air. It required a further stretching of her arms to cling onto the bottom of the helicopter, fortunately dragging it down a touch just as the hulk swung at it, leading to the red fist missing its target.

Obviously not wanting to fall from what she was now realising was a significant height, Kamala put all of her strength into her pushing herself up into a standing position, her face pretty much squished up against the glass whilst she balanced on the skid. It was quite apparent from their reactions that the crew inside hadn't been expecting a teenager to suddenly be appearing next to them. If it hadn't been for the destructive monster they were trying to catch on camera, it would have been the most shocking moment of their day.

Feeling the breeze picking up around her, and knowing that the hulk could choose to launch itself at them at any moment, Kamala wasn't intending on spending too much longer on there. With the occupants too dumbstruck to move, she casually knocked on the window, as if it was a common occurrence for her to be hanging off the side of a helicopter in midair. The door slowly opened, the crew looking at her with astonished looks.

"Yes?" the woman who looked like the reporter greeted her with.

"It'd be a massive help if you could move away, please!" Kamala told them. "We've got enough to clean up to also add a helicopter wreckage to the mix."

"Yeah…yes…of course." The reporter nudged one of her colleagues, who was carrying a large camera. "Would you mind doing a quick interview with us though? We're going live."

Kamala couldn't believe her luck. "Me? You want to interview me? On camera?"

"The latest Avenger would be a real coup for our channel."

Kamala could only blush, nodding her head eagerly. The others would surely have it covered with the hulk. And they'd described it as a quick chat. She'd be back in no time. And, if the rest of her team wanted to complain once she returned, it wasn't as if she was going to care. She was going to be on tv . Actual television. Forget the superhero business, this was what would make her mum proud.

Wong nodded his head in satisfaction as he watched the helicopter start to drift away. "That's one problem dealt with, at least."

"The easier of the two," Dan reminded him, as if it needed pointing out.

"We need to draw the Hulk away from such a crowded area."

"He seems perfectly happy just staying up there," Jennifer said. "As if he's been told to do exactly that. It'd explain why he didn't go for the chopper."

"Maybe he's been instructed to make the biggest spectacle of himself," Dan reasoned. "Like the others. Be a distraction. Like I said, he's doing King Kong. The headlines write themselves."

"Then we'll have to provide something that's too enticing for him to ignore," Wong suggested. He frowned when he felt his pocket buzzing, pulling out a phone and staring at the message that popped up.

"Hold on, you've got a phone?" Marc asked in disbelief.

"Yes?"

"The Master of the Mystic Arts…uses an iPhone?"

"I can't contact everyone through summons across the astral plane, can I? And I also like the games."

"Who is it that's trying to reach you?" Jennifer wondered, trying to catch a glimpse of his contact list. It was intriguing to know just how many high-profile people he'd met over the years.

"Perhaps the perfect distraction we can use. If I can force the hulk through a portal, then we can have some sort of control over the amount of damage it can do. We'd need an area of open space, away from a densely packed civilization."

Dan nudged him. "Where there's already a group of superheroes…"

"They wouldn't be happy about it."

"I'd rather face them whilst they're angry instead of the big guy."

"A good point well made. Marc, do you think you could reach him up there?"

Moon Knight didn't look particularly pleased about the suggestion. "I suppose so. I'm going to regret doing this, aren't I?"

"Quite possibly. Now…everyone…whilst he's getting to him, our job is to maintain the attention of the Hulk, through any means necessary."

Blonsky stamped his foot heavily on the ground, bringing up a chunk of tarmac, and threw it with surprising accuracy towards the creature. It seemed to hit its target, judging from the loud roar that they were greeted with. The others, in the meantime, looked over at Abomination with wide eyes, particularly when the rubble eventually fell to the ground, taking out a lamppost and the front half of a poorly placed car.

"What?" he said with a nonchalant shrug. "Too much?"

He'd kickstarted their attack, whether it was a good move or not. Moon Knight took to skating over the nearby buildings, making jumps that defied all logic in Dan's view. Jennifer was close behind, putting her might into one particularly big leap to close the distance. Blonsky was attempting to make himself look as intimidating as possible, roaring into the London air. Wong, meanwhile, was running across the road to get a better angle, flinging shards of energy towards the great beast.

Dan didn't think it was having much impact. "What are you doing?"

"Annoying him into submission."

"Do you think that's a good idea?"

"We'll certainly find out in a minute."

"Is there anything that I can do to help?"

"Yes, the most important thing. Stand right there. Exactly in that spot."

"You're just trying to keep me out of the way, aren't you?"

"Trust me, in a moment, you're going to wish that that was the case."

Moon Knight flung a blade towards the monster, only to see it deflect off fairly harmlessly. He was about to give up hope, planning another avenue of attack, when an orange portal appeared in the sky. A winged figure flew out, one that he instantly recognised. Her curly brown hair was unmistakable, along with her golden outfit. He was so distracted by the sight that he almost lost his footing. He would have fallen quite painfully if the new member of their team hadn't been there to catch him.

He looked up, seeing her smiling face. "Layla?"

"You sound surprised," she replied.

"You've got your powers back?"

"Taweret was more than happy to see me again. It was the only way I was going to be of any use to the group."

"The last thing I wanted is for you to be subjugated to a god again."

She shrugged, which was pretty difficult when she was mid-flight. "You did the same. We're in this together. Right? Be careful with your answer, because I could drop you fairly easily."

He chuckled despite the situation. "Do you need clueing in on what's going on?"

"Stop the big red guy?"

"Kinda. Think you can get him to come down?"

"It'd be my pleasure."

She dropped him on top of the Houses of Parliament, wincing as his heavy landing caused some of the design work to break and crack. Layla had enough time to wave at a bemused Jennifer, who had to admit that she was liking what she was seeing. The Scarlet Scarab soared through the air towards their foe, hurtling a few golden feathers straight towards his face. Although they didn't stick, they'd certainly caught his attention. Instead of continuing the offensive, she chose to flutter right in his eyeline, just out of reach. The hulk made grabs for her but kept missing, much to his growing frustrations. Each time, he was leaning just a bit further forward.

"Come on, you big piece of red meat. Come and get me!"

A few more painful jabs and the hulk was roaring angrily, which seemed to signify his decision. Layla only just managed to react in time as he jumped forward, his left hand almost grabbing her as he fell past. Lower down she went, making sure to keep his attention. Each jump he made, the closer the creature seemed to be getting. Until Blonsky threw another piece of rubble right at him, taking over. He instantly regretted the choice, running even before the hulk had started to chase after him.

"Are you ready, Dan?" Wong asked.

"What for?!"

"You're the target!"

Dan was sure that he was going to wet himself. Blonsky was charging towards him, with the hulk right behind. Each gigantic footstep seemed to make him shake, his knees going weak. Closer they came with still no sign of the sorcerer doing anything. Abomination was practically on top of him, and he looked just as concerned about their close proximity as Dan was.

"WONG!"

Blonsky jumped over Dan, who closed his eyes. It meant he missed the portal opening as soon as Abomination was out of the way, the Hulk having too much momentum to slow down in time. The monster hurtled through the unexpected opening, landing in the jungle beyond. They could hear him roar again, but that was soon silenced by Wong firmly closing the gateway. Dan focused on breathing slowly, bringing himself to the ground for a much needed sit down.

"I think that went really well," Blonsky congratulated them, transforming back into his human form.

"Emil?"

"Yes, Wong?"

"We're going to need to get you a new set of clothes."

And to Dan, that was the sight that most terrified him that day.