So, this would be my first time taking another man on a date. Now, I know what you're all thinking, but it isn't like that. I think. Well, I hope to God it isn't like that because – also contrary to popular belief – I'm not gay.

Not even a little.

Well, maybe a little.

And besides, Mr. Grizzled wasn't exactly making goo goo eyes at me. Actually, it seemed almost as though he was doing his best not to look me straight in the eye. Considering he knew what I was, I couldn't blame him. Hell, if my life were a game show, and sometimes it felt like one, I'd say, "Give the man a prize and a round of applause, folks."

Since the guy had just saved me from having to rip that other random guy into pieces and – more importantly- from almost losing my job, I decided to treat Mr. Mysterious to a Starbuck's coffee. It's the least someone as filthy and undeservedly rich as me can do. Literally.

Also, I really wanted to see a guy his size sitting in a barely there Starbuck's chair. Call it a guilty pleasure.

And as I watched him awkwardly spin his iced latte, which looked like a tall even though it was a grande thanks to his freakish size, it occurred to me that I needed to ask for a name so I could stop referring to him as insert-creepy-pet-name-here.

"So, my name is Thomas Raith. As you seem to know, I'm a vampire from the White Court. You could say I'm a half-vampire-"

"And you could say I'm a banana."

I blinked. "Do we know for a fact you aren't a banana, Mr…" I let the sentence trail, expecting him to give me his name. When that didn't work I just asked him what his name was. You know, like a normal person. Not like a life-force eating sex vampire.

The man, whose face was slightly squarer than my brother's, and whose shoulders were slightly broader was suddenly channeling his semi-autistic mannerisms. Then he mumbled, "It's Larry Resden."

Holy. Shit.

Only my brother can come up with an alias that bad. A quick glance at his right hand revealed the disillusionment ring he'd been using to conceal his appearance from me. Furious, I leapt out of my seat, just as Harry pointed over my shoulder, and urgently yelled for Mab to hit me with the forget-me stick.

"Quick, Mab! Hit him with the forget-me stick!"

And that's the last thing I remember.

….When I see him again, I'm gonna kill him.

A/N: A half vampire becomes a full vampire after their first kill, in case anyone's wondering why Dresden was skeptical.

Other plans for the ending include a POV chapter that shows Dresden flashing Thomas with the memory loss stick from MIB, or at least a magical charm that was created to resemble that device. After flashing him, Dresden tells Thomas to go home and have sex with Justine.

See? He's a good brother.