Apex awoke cold and empty, though only the former was literal. He lay alone on his bed, tail twitching as he entered the waking world. He stretched, hoping he'd bump Null in the process, but no such luck. Null's bed was on the other side of the room. And using context clues he could tell that Null wasn't even in the room, based on Apex's windsense and the new, tingling sensation at the back of his mind that let him feel other living creatures.
You're welcome.
It was exceptionally disorienting, and didn't work on Null anyway.
I'm not apologizing.
It was fine, he'd get used to it eventually. Hopefully.
It's bothering you. It's not fine. But we needed it to protect Null.
It was fine.
Apex opened his eyes to see that Null's bed was, of course, empty. New scratches marked the cushions, from Null's claws and tailblade. Apex climbed to his feet and stretched. He was exhausted, despite the restful sleep he had just awoken from. Why was he so exhausted? Well, he had exerted himself yesterday, flying as fast as he possibly could in order to keep up with Cynder.
Manipulating your magic like that was exhausting.
That shadow tunnel thing she had done to go through the stone was amazing, but by the Ancestors it was hard to fly through. Like the air was actively resisting movement. Well, it wasn't air, was it? He hadn't been able to channel his magic in there, since there wasn't any air. But he'd been able to breathe just fine. Weird stuff.
But then, you think most things are weird.
Flying through stone while enshrouded in darkness aside, obliterating that rock troll had been draining on its own. He'd used lightning. Lightning! He could use lightning! Apex had never imagined he'd ever have magic other than wind at his disposal. How could he, when he hadn't even known what convexity was? All he had to do was make sure the other one stayed nice and tucked away, where it couldn't hurt anyone.
I'm only going to hurt Dolus. Everyone else is negotiable. Except for Null. I will never hurt Null.
Admittedly, all he could really do on command was create static on his clawtips or shoot enough lightning from his maw to blast stone to pieces. But that was a start, and a better start than most dragons. Volteer had told him that he'd give him training in controlling lightning magic, which was quite possibly the… fourth coolest thing that had happened in the past four months. Maybe fifth. Either way it was pretty high up on the list. He'd have the opportunity to learn magic from a Guardian! From a living legend! Two living legends, since Cynder was going to teach him to keep the convexity in him under control and tutor him in wind magic!
Why did Cynder's training only come to mind after you were done gushing about Volteer?
Of course, learning from Cynder was the cooler one. But having two teachers like that was even better.
Never mind. I figured it out. Volteer's offer was more recent. Hey, where did Null go? Why did he leave us? Is he in danger?
Apex realized suddenly that he'd gotten himself so excited over what could come later that he'd forgotten what had started him on this convoluted train of thought in the first place. Null was absent, the door to the room Teneris had given them was ajar. Null had probably just woken up first and headed out to breakfast already.
Well, nothing to do but follow suit. He was hungry.
Apex pushed the door open further and walked out into the hall, down the stairs, and into the main living area. He could smell breakfast now, frying eggs and sizzling meats. His mouth was watering at the scent.
He was aware of Teneris' position well before he entered the dining room, a faint awareness that told him where the shadow dragon was even through the wall. Null was another story. He didn't know where Null was until he was all the way into the room, and Null was just sitting quietly at the table.
"Good morning," Null said. He had something in his claws, a pair of cylindrical metal things bound together with a strap. On closer examination, Apex saw that they were goggles.
"What're those?" Apex asked, leaning closer.
"Aethersight goggles. Volteer said I could keep them after I told him about the wraith." Null kept fiddling with them for a bit, only to stop and look up at Apex, taking note of his confusion. "Uh. How to explain? Aethersight is what Spyro can do, it lets him see magic in all its forms. He can do that because he's the purple dragon, his innate element is aether, which is like… undifferentiated magic. It can become anything. The goggles let whoever wears them see magic like Spyro does. Or, similarly, I guess. Aethersight is apparently a magical sense, not literally a type of sight."
"Oh, like windsense, or that weird tingling in the back of my head that tells me where your dad is."
Null gave him a weird look for a moment, but nodded. "Yeah. Apparently I'm almost invisible to all magical senses."
"Yeah you said something about that yesterday. What's that about?" Apex tilted his head.
"I'm not just immune to magic, I absorb it." Null picked at the strap on the goggles for a moment, then set them down carefully and looked at his claws. Those claws that were so sharp he woke up with new holes in his cushions every morning. "You know how your wind magic has to actually touch something and come back for you to feel it properly? That principle applies to all magical senses, apparently. And light, if I understood Volteer correctly. Magic can't bounce off of me because it just gets absorbed."
"Huh…" Apex frowned. That was concerning. "Weird."
"Yeah." Null stared at the goggles. "It really is."
"Null, breakfast is ready. Could you get- oh!" Teneris stepped into the dining room, carrying a platter of scrambled eggs and sliced ham in his front paws. He was balanced carefully on his hindpaws, wings outstretched to maintain balance as he made his way to the table. "Good morning Apex. Did you sleep well?"
"I think so? I'm still tired, but it wasn't like I had trouble getting to sleep or anything." Apex shrugged.
"Ah, well, I'm very sorry to hear that." Teneris set the platter down. "Well, breakfast is here. I think I went overboard, but Null has told me this probably isn't enough."
"It isn't." Null quickly snagged a few slices of ham, moving them to a smaller plate. A moment later he scooped a bunch of eggs onto the plate as well. "Get what you want, because there won't be any left after Apex gets his share."
"Are you sure? This is a lot of eggs…"
Apex nodded. "Yeah, I'm hungry."
"...Right." Teneris took his own plate and portioned out his share, then took a step back. "Well, have at it."
When Apex was done, the platter was spotless.
"You most certainly weren't underselling your appetite," Teneris said eventually, his plate barely touched.
"Mmhmm." Apex nodded, swallowing the last of the eggs. "Thank you for breakfast."
"Yeah, you can have mine." Teneris pushed his plate across the table. "If you're still hungry."
"Thanks!"
Before Apex could begin eating, there was a knock on the front door. Teneris tilted his head, then nodded.
"Ah, I'll be right back." Teneris stood and walked into the other room.
Apex shrugged and started eating, pausing only when Null slipped on the goggles and furrowed his brow. Null reached over slowly and flicked out one claw at the air next to Apex's head, pulling it slowly back to himself and tilting his head. The dark green dragon muttered something indistinct, then shook his head.
"Whassup?" Apex asked, mouth full of eggs.
"Someone's using magic." Null slashed at the air, and Apex heard a short gasp in the other room.
A moment later, Teneris returned with another dragon at his side. Apex recognized her from the council meeting. She was gray-scaled, with a faint pink tinge around the edges. A large bony frill extended backwards from her skull, shielding her neck and making her silhouette larger from the front. She stood shorter than Teneris, though still a bit larger than Apex was. Her tail split halfway along its prehensile length, ending in a pair of scaleless bulbs.
"Oh my, I wasn't expecting someone to counterspell me," The dragoness said.
"Don't use mind magic on my friend." Null scowled.
"You must be Null. A pleasure to meet you." The dragoness bowed her head. "My apologies if what I did seemed invasive. I promise, I was just finding out how many people I should expect. Many magical senses are passive and unintrusive. Mind dragons do not have that luxury."
"...I'll have to take your word for it." Null took the goggles off again.
"Well that was…" Teneris cleared his throat. "Null, Apex, I'd like you to meet Ida. She's the council representative for dragons of the mind element, and also something of an expert on how the mind works.
"Expert is… well, not entirely accurate. I studied how the minds of sapient creatures operate when I was younger, and perhaps back then I'd have accepted the title of expert without questioning it. Now, though, I am a bit out of practice." Ida chuckled lightly. "I once wanted to make it my life's work, but fate had other plans. I do still keep up-to-date on new findings, though."
"I've asked Ida if she would be willing to give you two counseling, and-," Teneris began, only to be cut off by Ida.
"Spyro has told me about your adventures, and it must be so very hard on you to have gone through that." Ida smiled kindly. "That's why I'm here. You've experienced a great deal of trauma, and coping with that can be very hard."
"Oh." Null relaxed visibly. "Okay. Yeah. I… I think I need some help with that."
"I'm fine." Apex shrugged.
No we're not.
"If you're not ready to share, I won't force you," Ida said. "It can take time -,"
"I'm fine."
Stop lying.
Ida gave him a strange look, but nodded. "If you're sure. I'm here if you ever change your mind."
"I'm sure," Apex replied coldly, standing up. He pushed past the mind dragon and made his way out the front door.
You're awful. She's trying to help, you don't need to be like that to her…
Apex ignored the pang of guilt. He was fine. He didn't need help. He didn't. He just needed to clear his head. As soon as Apex was outside he took flight, creating an updraft to immediately gain height.
He was fine. He didn't need some mind dragon digging around in his brain. He was pretty sick of people telling him he wasn't okay when he very much was. Heck, he was better than okay! He had two elements now! And the ability to see the future! He was stronger than he'd ever been before!
Seeming strong above all else? You're thinking like Dolus.
…No. No, stop that. Don't say that.
But it's true.
It's not.
Apex flew to a high place, he didn't really care where, and perched on the edge of a rooftop. He had to take several deep breaths to calm himself before he could get himself to stop digging his claws into the masonry.
He needed to clear his mind. Get over his anger. Apex closed his eyes and took a deep breath. In, and out. In, and out.
O-O-O
There was a new addition to the nothing in the back of Apex's mind. The table with a partially-reconstructed statuette was still there, as was the pile of blankets and the blobby portrait of Null. But there was also an orb of yellow energy, crackling with lightning as it floated in the middle of nothing.
The shadow was there, its luminous white eyes fixed on the splinters of the tiny wooden statuette. It looked over at Apex for a moment, then returned its attention to the splinters. There were an awkward few moments where the shadow slowly picked up one splinter and slid it into place.
"Why are you doing that?" Apex asked suddenly.
"So that we don't forget just how close we were to dying." The shadow gently put another splinter into place.
"But I want to forget that. It's horrible to think about." Apex frowned.
"We can't. What if it happens again? What then? If we forget…" The shadow trailed off in an uncomfortable whine. "Can't let it happen. Can't. We need to remember."
"You lied to me."
The shadow stopped what it was doing, freezing. After a moment, it turned towards him with hurt in its eyes.
"I didn't lie to you."
"Yes you did. You showed me that Null was in danger. But Null's invisible to magical senses. You made it up," Apex accused, "Was that a vision at all? Or was it some kind of manipulation tactic?"
"No! No. No. It was a vision. We had to… to see in more directions to keep Null safe. To look past time. Time is so easy to crack, if you go at it from the right angle. Even dragons whose primary element isn't vision can do it…" The shadow rambled aimlessly, padding around the non-room, "I have so little to do, just secluded in the back of your mind. I search and search and search for Null. And he's so hard to find, but there's an absence wherever he is. There are so many possibilities that could be Null in danger, but…"
Images flashed across the nothingness. Orcs climbing out of a crevice in the ground to rush towards a small settlement. Creatures of cloud and wind hurling bolts of lightning at dragons. Fire forming into insectoid shapes that rushed down any living thing nearby. An enormous, amorphous blob of water rising up to form a draconic head, roaring its displeasure to the world. The earth cracked open to release a thing of rock and magma, formed of partially melted buildings.
"There's so much out there… so much where I can't see Null. But that absence isn't there either. I didn't lie to you. I told you, I couldn't see him there. I was just filling in the gaps." The shadow shook its head. "I didn't lie. I didn't. I wouldn't. Why would I lie to myself? Not like you. You lie to us all the time."
"What are you talking about?" Apex demanded.
"I'm fine. I'm not bothered by what's going on. I'm well-adjusted, and not traumatized by either my father's abuse or the near-death experiences I've been in. I'll deal with my problems when I have time. I'm nothing like my father." The shadow always spoke with Apex's voice, but that strange quality to its voice was gone for a moment. "Sound familiar? You've been lying to us for your whole life."
"Why all this we and us? You're not me. You're magic, pretending to be a person. You're not real." Apex scowled.
"You're dodging the topic-,"
"I don't care what you have to say!" Apex spat, "I don't like you, I don't care what you think, and I'm not letting you dictate how I live my life! You're not me!"
"But-,"
"You keep coming back to this! You won't let it go! You aren't me, and I'm not you!"
There was silence for a brief while.
"Why are you so mean to me?" The shadow whined, recoiling into itself, "Who am I supposed to be? All I know is being Apex. You're awful."
"I really do not care what you think. You're not a person. You're just… magic. You certainly aren't me. Just go away."
O-O-O
"I didn't know they put marble gargoyles on top of the library."
Apex's eyes snapped open, and he blinked a few times to orient himself. He turned towards the source of the voice, scowling. "What do you want?"
"Woah, sorry. Wasn't trying to pick a fight. Just the whole grimacing thing, and you were sitting perfectly still…" The other dragon took a couple of steps back. "Sometimes I have bad days too. Just gotta get away from other people before you snap at them. I get it."
"That's not…" Apex shook his head, then stopped, sighing. He let his head drop. "Yeah."
"Yeah, people tell me I have a big mouth, so if you want me to go, I'll just… go."
"You don't have to, I'm just… touchy." Apex took a deep breath and actually looked at the other dragon.
He was small and slight of build, about Null's size. He had only two legs, his forelimbs being a pair of large wings with articulated digits at the front instead. Those wings were leathery, like those of a bat. A light coat of brown fur covered most of the dragon's body, save for his face, joints, and the wide, flat tip of his tail. His head was oddly shaped, with pointy ears poking up from the sides instead of horns or frills or fins. Those rare patches of scales were a blood red color, accenting the dragon's big brown eyes. He had a couple of pouches tucked against his sides.
"Hey, since you're staring, I've tried out a new soap lately to try and make sure my fur's got that nice gloss. What do you think?" The dragon asked, posing and grinning cheekily.
"I dunno, it looks healthy I guess?" Apex frowned, nonplussed. "Uh, sorry for staring. I just… haven't seen a dragon that looks like you."
"Well, I could say the same thing! Most dragons have only two wings, even the ones that only have two legs." The furred dragon chuckled, relaxing his pose. "I'm a fear dragon. My family - and others from the Darklands, actually - have fur and only four limbs. And -," He wiggled his pointy ears. "-external ears, to hear better. Some fear dragons have all sorts of wild adaptations, like retractable frills or eye-patterns. Cool stuff. I'm Vlad, by the way."
"I'm Apex. I'm, uh, a wind dragon."
"So are the extra wings a subspecies thing, like my fur is?" Vlad tilted his head, his ears flopping to one side as he did.
"No, it's a me thing. Completely unique, they grew in a bit less than a week ago." Apex flapped his lower set of wings once, then shrugged. "I've been exposed to some magic that I really shouldn't have been, and apparently one of the side effects is physical mutation."
"Wow, that's weird," Vlad said. After a moment his ears perked up. "Oh wait, Apex. You're one of the kids staying with Teneris, right? Well, I say kids, I'm your age."
"How do you know about that?" Apex narrowed his eyes.
"My mum's Nos, she's on the council," Vlad explained cheerily, "She told me that Teneris told her that he was looking after two kids who were from his old home village. It's cool to meet you in person!"
"It's, uh, cool to meet you too." Apex was… unsure what to make of Vlad. Maybe in another time he'd get along well with the fear dragon, but there was too much bouncing around in his head to relax right now. Maybe after he'd gotten something to eat. "I'm, uh, going to go get lunch. If you want to come with?"
"Ooh, asking for a date already? We just met!" Vlad feigned surprised, fluttering his eyelids.
"What? No!" Apex recoiled, scowling. He wasn't interested like that! He wasn't. He wasn't. Although Vlad was kind of cute, with those big eyes and expressive ears. He wasn't interested. "It was just-,"
"I'm just ribbing you. Yeah I could go for lunch." Vlad laughed, eyes twinkling. "I figure I have to, since you don't seem to have any money on you."
"Oh, I… didn't think about that." Apex shrank in on himself. That was embarrassing.
"Come on, I know this great noodle place." Vlad grinned. "I'll be paying."
Well, there really wasn't any other option, was there?
There was. There totally was. He could go back to Teneris' home at any time. But he didn't want to have someone he didn't know psychoanalyzing him. Telling him he had something wrong with him. There was nothing wrong with him. It was just the other guy in the back of his mind who was the problem, and Apex had it under control.
Apex followed Vlad into Warfang. If nothing else, he'd have something good to eat, and a new friend besides that. When he was done, then he'd go back to Teneris' house.
O-O-O
"He just leaves Null. How could he? He's abandoning Null. Running off with someone we don't even know. Why? Why would he do that? I don't understand…
"I'm not leaving. He can't make me. I belong here. I've always been here. I just wasn't… me.
"How long have I thought of myself as separate from him?
"It doesn't matter. We're not the same person anymore. He made that perfectly clear.
"But… who am I? If he is Apex, what am I?
"…I know.
"If he is Apex, if he is the peak of our experience and our existence, then I will be his complement. The one who remembers the hurt, who tempers it and uses it to make us stronger. The lowest point, from which we can only climb upwards.
"If he is the apex, then I am the nadir.
"Nadir… it has a ring to it.
"Yes. That is who I am. Who I need to be to protect the one we love. To protect Null.
"Nadir."