*runs from torches and pitchforks* I know, I know! It's been forever! I'm sorry! But here it is! Don't kill me!
The ice was thinning out. The blade was crushing, the point stabbing. If he was not himself, if he was someone else, he would say so much to him, he would tell the truth.
He could hardly breathe. He let warm tears run down his face. He was a servant. Just a servant. No more. Gaius had said the Lamia had simply pulled darker thoughts from the man's mind and let them spill.
Hadn't the knights told him he was worthless? And he knew it. His life was killing himself for the Once and Future King. He was lying to everyone, betraying the friendship.
But was there any friendship? Had there ever been?
And...the Lamia...they had attacked him. For months, his pale skin had been flecked with indigo bruises. They hadn't faded mentally. He was becoming a stranger.
Maybe that's all he ever was.
He was wanting forgiveness for sins not performed, wanting friendship through an iron wall.
He was irrelevant. Hanging on by a thread.
He had lost weight. He was gaunt, dark shadows highlighting his duller eyes. He was sad, lonely...
Gods, was he tired...
He couldn't keep hanging on.
The blanch face of the moon surveyed him as he sat helplessly by Freya. The girl he loved. The girl who had left him.
It was all his fault. All of it. He ran a shaky hand through his hair, and crawled to the lake's edge.
One long finger brushed the smooth water. His eyes were begging her to come out. Begging her to be there.
Begging somebody to be there.
But there was no-one. She didn't come.
And he accepted he was alone.
Just as he leaned back, tears falling from his eyes, he caught a glimpse. A glimpse of a reflection of dark hair...
He leaned over. And saw the pale face of himself, saw his tears...
And suddenly, it changed. His features became more dainty, his hair longer, eyes fading from sapphire to emerald...
And she looked at him, contemplating him.
"Hello, Merlin. It's been a while."
"No...Morgana..." he breathed. His eyes widened as he looked at the black dot on his arm, that he had noticed for a while but thought nothing of it, run like ink into the image of two entwining vines, running through a skulls mouth, and the vines were like a chain...and one chain was breaking...
"What have you done to me?!"
And she laughed. "Only helped you see what you noticed before but never registered."
Merlin picked up the dagger he had fastened to his belt...he plunged the cool blade into the water...
Poor kid. Seers, guys, he has da reasons to be depressedamundo.
Kk, c ya. Review pwetty pwease!
BToAxxxxxxxxxxx