Chapter 9: Forest On A Cloud/Master Of The Barn
Larkkit had just started picking up the crowfood off of the floor of the barn, when she started to sing.
"There is a forest on a cloud! I like to go there in my sleep! Aren't any food for me to throw away! Not in my forest on a cloud!" The light brown she-cat flicked her tail to leftover crowfood.
"There is a fresh pile that's full of food! There are hundred kits with play with! No cat yowls or mews too loud! Not in my forest on a cloud." She thought of happily playing with all the she-kits and cats..
Then she remembered her mother. A lovely she-cat, who promised she would come back.
"There is a she-cat.. Shining bright! Licks me and meows a lullaby! She's nice to see and she has soft fur! She says, 'Larkkit, I love you very much!'" Larkkit wrapped her tail around her paws.
"I know a place where no cat's lost! I know a place where no cat mews.. Mewling at all is not allowed! Not in my forest on a cloud." She smiled.
But her smile soon faded.
"Oh help, I think I hear them now! And I'm nowhere near finished getting the crowfood the barn floor. Oh, it's her! It's Dapplefang!" She mewed.
A calico she-cat stomped into where the small tabby was.
"Now look who's here! The little she-kit herself! Pretending once again she's been so awfully good!" Dapplefang snarled.
"Better not catch you slacking! Better not catch my eye! Ten rotten squirrels your mother send me, what's that going to get?" She growled.
"Now go outside and fetch some fresh-kill that is in the wood!" She demanded.
"We should never have taken you in in the first place, how stupid the things that we do! Like mother like daughter, the scum of the forest!" She spat, like yelling about Larkkit put a bad taste in her mouth.
Then a beautiful blue-gray kit hit the back of Larkkit's head with her tail.
"Rainkit, come my dear, Rainkit, let me see you! You look very well with fur combed down! There's some little kits who know how to behave! And they know how to act! And I'm saying thank Starclan for that." The calico adored her daughter, Rainkit, who was treated well, unlike Larkkit.
Fawnkit noticed a little whisker. "The tabby is still there." She muttered to her mother.
"Still there, Larkkit? Your tears will do you no good! I told you fetch some fresh-kill from deep wood!" She told the kit.
"Please down not send me out alone! Not in the darkness on my own!" Larkkit mewled.
"Enough of that! Or I'll forget to be nice! You heard me ask for something, and I never ask twice!" Rainkit pushed the small kit out.
Dapplefang went to where her stupid mate was sleeping. "Wakey-wakey. We're opening." She growled.
"Come on you old pest." A white tom meowed after the barn had opened.
"Give us the best!" A grey tom sat next to white tom.
"Here, try this lot! Guaranteed to hit the spot, or I'm not Bramblesky." The light tabby tom promised, throwing a thrush.
"We're hungry too! Bramblesky, over here!" A blue-gray she-cat called.
"Right away, you scum.." He said to himself, then he dashed to the pile and got a bird, then padded over the she-cat.
"Starclan, this place is so messed up." A red tom uttered.
"So you tell me every day." A golden she-cat, his mate responded.
"The host, Bramblesky, he was there. So they say, at the battle of Breezeclan.." The red tom told his mate.
"Got there, it's true! When the fight was all through. But he knew just what to do, paddin' through the mud. So I've heard it said, pickin' up any kill that died in the battle.. The red tom meowed, taking a bite out of a mouse.
"I've believe that when foxes rule the forest!" His mate rolled her eyes.
Then Bramblesky went above his customer's heads.
"My band of rogues! My den of loner cats! My dirty jokes, my always pissed as newts.. My sons of rogues, spent their lives in my barn!" The tabby tom yowled.
"Homing pigeons homing in, they fly through my doors!" He yelled the metaphor.
"And their food's as good as yours." Bramblesky smirked.
He saw a orange tom walk in.
"Welcome, my friend, sit yourself down and meet the barn owner of the forest!" He meowed to the tom.
"Look over the rest! All of 'em rogues! Talkin' and fightin' over the food! Seldom, do you see... Honest cats like me! A gent of good indent, who's content to be.." He grinned.
He bounced to the top above the cats.
"Master of the barn! Doling out the charm! Ready with a thrush, and an open paw! Tells a saucy tale, makes a little stir! Customers appreciate a kindly cat! Glad to do a friend a favor.. Doesn't cost me to be nice.. But nothing gets you nothing Everything has got a little price!" The orange tom turned to leave, but Bramblesky got in his way.
"Master of the barn! Keeper of the den! Ready to relieve 'em of a mouse, or two! Filling up the pile! Making up the weight! Pickin' up their knick-knacks, when they can't see straight! Every cat loves a barn cat! Every cat's best friend! Starclan! Won't I bleed 'em in the end!" He murmured the last line.
"Master of the barn! Quick to catch yer eye! Never wants a passer-by to pass him by. Servant to the poor, colleague to the great! Comforter, philosopher, and lifelong mate! Everybody's boon companion, everybody's chaperon!" The customers yowled in glory.
"But hide up your food, Starclan! Won't I skin you to the bone!" Bramblesky meowed.
"Charge 'em for the mice, extra for the lice! Two more for looking in the over-sleeping twice. Here a little slice! There a little cut! Three more for sleeping with the window shut. When it comes to fixing prices, there are lots of tricks I knows!" He smiled.
"How it all increases, all those bits and pieces! Starclan! It's amazing how it grows!" The brown tabby proudly scanned the fresh-kill pile.
"Master of the barn! Quick to catch yer eye! Never wants a passer-by to pass him by. Servant to the poor, colleague to the great! Comforter, philosopher, and lifelong mate! Everybody's boon companion, gives 'em everything he's got!" The customers yelled, making the orange tom comfortable.
"Dirty bunch of cats! Oh, Starclan! What a sorry little lot." He whispered.
Meanwhile, a group of she-cats had gathered around Dapplefang.
"I used to dream that I would meet a handsome tom.. But Starclan almighty.. Have ya seen what's happened since?" The she-cats snickered.
"Master of the barn? Isn't worth my spit! Comforter, philosopher, and life-long foxdung!" The calico snarled.
"Cunning little tom! Regular mousebrain.. Thinks he's quite a lover.." She meowed.
"But there's not much there!" She whispered.
"What a cruel trick of nature, landed me with a such a louse! Starclan knows how I lasted, livin' with this mousedung in the house!" She yowled, and the she-cats purred with amusement.
"Master of the barn!" The customers shouted.
"Master and a half!" Dapplefang hopped away from the group.
"Comforter, philosopher!"
"Don't make me laugh!" She glared.
"Servant to the poor, colleague to the great!" The cats hooted.
"Hypocrite and crowfood and foxdung!" Dapplefang laughed.
"Every cat bless the landlord! Every cat bless his mate!" The crowd meowed.
"Every cat raise their tail!" Bramblesky yelled.
"Raise them up the arse!" Dapplefang shouted.
"Every cat raise their tail to the master of the barn!" All of the cats screamed.