A/N: Oh, reviewers, what would I do without you? Seiren, I do believe my face is fixed in a manic grin! Seriously, I can't express how grateful I feel for your words! (Oh, come on, don't beat down on yourself. I've read your Warriors fic; I'm just too damn lazy to actually review it.) Creature of the Night, Badgerclaw's mentor was Darkcloud. That's something I never mentioned; I had it in the allegiances in my look-up for maybe one day and then I made Badgerclaw a warrior. I'd started the fic and realized Badgerclaw didn't have a mentor, and I thought Darkcloud, being an older warrior, deserved an apprentice.
In all sincerity, to all my reviewers: I really do appreciate that you take the time to read this.
Chapter Twelve
"What do you want to do someday, Sunpaw?"
"Get off guard duty."
Rainpaw flicked her tail. "Come on. You know what I meant."
Sunpaw flexed her shoulders, which were growing stiff. Taking a deep breath of the cool night air, she answered, "Get an apprentice of my own...eventually have kits. Be recognized as a warrior of ThunderClan." She left the part about drawing Hawkclaw's blood unspoken.
"I want to know the secrets of StarClan," said Rainpaw, tilting her head to see through the now-thick leaves and look at the stars.
"If you want to know StarClan's secrets, why didn't you become a medicine cat?" asked Sunpaw, her usual sarcasm and exasperation gone.
Rainpaw shot Sunpaw a mildly amused glance and flicked her tail again. "Sunpaw, if there was a battle, I'd lose my mind. I'd panic. A medicine cat needs to keep calm during trouble, and I certainly don't."
"Well, at least you're honest."
The two sat in silence, ears pricked, eyes sharp, alert for any sign of trouble. Sunpaw braced her forepaws against the ground, stretching her legs. She sighed softly. The past three days had been uneventful, unless she counted watching Yellowflower's kits, Softkit and Rustykit, take their first few wobbly steps around the nursery. The creamy yellow queen was glad to have the new company of Waterdrip, who, according to Treeshadow, would give birth to her kits in about a half-moon.
Sunpaw shifted from one haunch to the other impatiently. Sitting nighttime watch was a dull task, and while she knew Sorrelflower would tell her to sit still and enjoy the sounds of the night, Sunpaw had things on her mind, things that jostled and crowded like sparrows, each trying for the best place.
She'd seen Shadowfur lurking around the Meeting-Tree two days before, on evening patrol. The flash of his dark fur and burning eyes had stayed in her vision for only a heartbeat before he slipped under the branches of the great willow, and no other cat had seen him. The wind had been blowing their scent towards Shadowfur, and Sunpaw had to admit he moved with a stealth that was exemplary even for a cat. She'd remembered Pinepaw warning her of the fox sitting under the willow, and Sunpaw found it highly unlikely it was a coincidence.
Hawkclaw seemed the same as ever, except more irritable and agitated. Icepaw had come back from hunting earlier that day to tell Sunpaw and Rainpaw he'd seen the mottled red-brown warrior baring his teeth at Shadowfur. In the same breath, the silver-white tom had also said it sounded like Hawkclaw was threatening his until-very-recently apprentice.
A rustle of leaves jarred Sunpaw from her thoughts. Tensing and unsheathing her claws along with Rainpaw, Sunpaw looked in the direction Rainpaw indicated with her gray tail. A heartbeat later, the long, whiskered snout of a possum poked out of a dense bush. Rainpaw sighed as the creature bumbled out of the bushes, its long, bald tail swishing through the grass.
Sunpaw fell back into thinking-mode again. It went to show how on edge many of the Clan were, if they were at the point where a nighttime possum visit startled them to the point of unsheathing their claws.
Claws. Hawkclaw.
Sunpaw shook herself. There were three cats she hadn't been able to get her mind off of for long periods of time, and the mottled warrior was one of them. It was worlds, if not universes, away from being any form of attraction; it was clinging thirst to avenge the death of Roseleaf.
The second cat was Shadowfur, and it too was in no way, shape, or form attraction. She recalled the dream she had had not too long ago, the one where dozens of black foxes had stalked around her before all but one vanished, and Shadowfur came up beside the remaining fox. Proud and self-assertive, even brash at times, Sunpaw was not stupid; no, she knew to heed warnings from StarClan.
The third cat was Icepaw. Sunpaw was young, not even four seasons, not even nine moons. She knew nothing of the word love, had only a vague knowledge that it meant a feeling of deep connection and care for another. She'd known Icepaw since she'd been old enough to comprehend speech and match sounds known as names with cats. She'd spent six moons in the nursery with him and Rainpaw as her only playmates, as Shadowfur had disdained them and Nightwhisker had been-still was-unmeasurably shy. If Sunpaw had ever heard Sorrelflower say that proximity was the starter of relationships...
But she'd never heard the tortoiseshell elder say that, and had no comprehension of the word love. All she knew was that she'd been...well, noticing him more often. She knew her fur prickled pleasantly when he brushed against her, liked it when he came over in the evenings and licked the fur around her ears as a way of greeting. Liked the glimmer in his deep velvet-blue eyes.
Sunpaw did not believe StarClan determined the fate of every cat. She believed in StarClan, yes, but not that they knew every step of the path of a cat's life. What she believed was that a single falter or mistake, a wrong word or action at exactly the wrong time, could-and did-change everything. One action or word determines the next. Many possible scenarios, only one outcome determined by the action a cat took. In battle, the smallest falter could cause the ultimate fall. Which was why Sunpaw, if she had comprehension of the word love, would not believe that it was fate that she would, as she knew Rainpaw would put it, "fall in" with Icepaw.
Sunpaw shook herself. It was going to be a long night.
;-;-;-;
Sunpaw sat outside the den, sharing a magpie with Rainpaw. They were having, as many toms put it, "she-cat time" together. It was just barely sunhigh, and the air was already hotter than it had been lately. Every day carried more heat on the breeze, more scents of plants flowering. As Rainpaw glanced across the camp, she suddenly stopped mid-word.
"What?" asked Sunpaw, trying to follow her gaze.
Rainpaw had already turned back to the magpie. "Badgerclaw rubbing his nose on Nightwhisker's cheek," she said with a shrug. "Kind of surprised me for a minute."
"What? Badgerclaw is showing affection?" asked Sunpaw, trying to see the mottled gray warrior as she craned her neck, not caring how flat-out obvious she was being. "With Nightwhisker? What does she see in him, pray tell?"
Rainpaw stared at her. "You're jumping to conclusions rather quickly, aren't you?" she said around a mouthful of feathers.
Sunpaw flicked her ears. "Who are you, Icepaw and Lightningstar? I get told I'm jumping to conclusions twice a day by both of them." She took a bite of magpie. "Look, Rainpaw, when a cat like Badgerclaw starts rubbing his nose on Nightwhisker's cheek, something tells me they've..." she couldn't find the right word. "Help me out here," she said to Rainpaw.
"Fallen in?" suggested the white she-cat.
"Yes. Thanks." She watched as the warriors in context padded out of the warrior's den together, up the slope, and out of camp.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, finishing the magpie, and started sharing tongues. Darkcloud strolled past, heading for the fresh-kill pile.
"That reminds me," said Sunpaw. "You seen Shadowfur anywhere today?"
Rainpaw thought for a moment. "No," she answered. "Last time I saw him was last night, before I went to sleep. He was talking to Hawkclaw."
Sunpaw frowned. She didn't like this. Since gaining his warrior name, the black tom had been in camp less and less frequently, and no cat could convince her he was just out hunting. She remembered seeing him slipping under the Meeting-Tree a few days earlier, the same place where Pinepaw had seen the fox.
Before she could say anything, Lightningstar called her name. "Gotta go," she said to Rainpaw. The small white she-cat mewed good-bye as Sunpaw trotted over to her mentor and leader.
As she dipped her head in greeting, Sunpaw glared scorchingly at Lightningstar's white feet. Depending on the cat and the offense, Sunpaw could forgive in either less than ten minutes or never. With Lightningstar, her own leader and mentor, who she had begun to look to as a sort of foster father, not believing her about Hawkclaw, she wasn't ready to forgive just yet. Most of the anger at Lightningstar had dissipated, but Sunpaw had a tendency to hold grudges.
"Come," said the black-and-white tom after returning the head-dip. "We are going hunting." His tone made it plain that he would also be telling her something along the way, and Sunpaw told him so.
He met her gaze, lightning-yellow eyes fixed on emerald-green. After a heartbeat, he sighed. "I don't know where you get your intuition, Sunpaw, but it serves you well. Yes. There is something I want to tell you." Beckoning with his long tail, he sat down under the shade of a towering hickory. Sunpaw stood in front of him, waiting for him to speak.
"As you know, Sunpaw, I am not a young cat. I have been leader of ThunderClan for many seasons." He was leaning forward and whispering, as though he thought the hickory was trying to listen in. "As of right now, Treeshadow is the only cat who knows this. I have not told Mudspeckle." Sunpaw twitched her tail; Mudspeckle was, after all, Lightningstar's deputy and friend. "I want to tell you that I am on my last life."
The gentle breeze that had been wafting through the trees stopped abruptly, as though the forest had just gotten the breath startled out of it. Sunpaw gaped at him, trying to speak. She knew the leader of her Clan was old, yes, had seen many battles and harsh winters, but was he really so old as to have only one of his nine lives remaining? Clearly, Lightningstar felt a need to explain.
"Many seasons ago," he said, "the forest suffered what was quite possibly the worst leaf-bares ever known. Many cats died, from cold, starvation, disease...I was one of those cats. I lost a life at the claws of all three."
Sunpaw stared at him. A young, strong leader losing three lives in one leaf-bare? "What did Treeshadow do?" she demanded. "He was still medicine cat then, wasn't he?"
Lightningstar shook his head. "I had been leader for only one moon when the leaf-bare came. Treeshadow was still Sleetwind's apprentice. Treeshadow was abouteleven moons."
"So what did this Sleetwind do? If he was the medicine cat–"
"It was the most difficult leaf-bare ever known to have happened," Lightningstar interrupted. "He had no herbs. His collected stock dwindled fast. He, and all the other medicine cats, could literally do nothing but watch and give words of hope." The black-and-white tom paused. "I was young then, Sunpaw, and over the seasons I have lost lives in battles, accidents, and in other leaf-bares.
"Do not worry about my being on my last life, young Sunpaw. It will be alright. Now come. The Clan needs fresh-kill."
It could not have been more clear to Sunpaw that she was not to tell anybody what she had learned.
;-;-;-;
Sunpaw kept in perfect step with Lightningstar. Icepaw flanked her, and Rainpaw trotted on Lightningstar's other side. Jaywing brought up the rear.
Lightningstar had decided to take ThunderClan's only apprentices to see the Silverstone; the necessary trip all apprentices made. He had picked a good day for it: the crystal-blue sky was clear of clouds, a gentle breeze swept through the forest, and the air was as it had been; comfortably warm. Bright splotches dotted the green foliage; tiny blue flowers on bushes, flame-red tulips standing out against the dark tree trunks, giant white and orange lilies spreading along the streambanks.
The bitter traveling herbs Treeshadow had given them all made Sunpaw's stomach squeeze and twist; the herbs were certainly doing their job of preventing hunger. The golden sun had sunk low in the sky, but no streaks of sunset yet showed.
Lightningstar led the patrol towards the sun-drown-place, as Sunpaw had known he would. She remembered her first day out as an apprentice, when her mentor had told her leaders and medicine cats reached the Silverstone by means of a path near the cliffs. Wonder if we'll go down the same rock path I did when I found Morning, Sunpaw thought. She doubted it.
Sure enough, she was not surprised when, once the breeze carried threads of salt and the rush of the ocean could be heard, Lightningstar veered to his left, taking a route away from the cliffs. The grass along this trail was well-beaten, crushed almost completely to nothing but dust after so many generations of paws walking it. Icepaw shot a glance at Sunpaw, his deep blue eyes glinting excitedly. Sunpaw herself was feeling energetic, despite the two main thoughts crashing around her mind.
For starters, Lightningstar being on his last life still had her...well, shocked was the closest word. Somehow, though, she'd known, although her leader did not entirely look his age.
For second, she wondered if she would see any shadow-cats at the Silverstone. The first one, the gray one with the limp, she'd seen at the cliffs. The second one she had seen more frequently: a regal tom with flaming fur and deep green eyes, who had appeared to her twice in dreams. The Silverstone was the voice of StarClan, after all; surely shadow-cats walked there, protecting it from harm?
Scents of the other three Clans washed over Sunpaw's scent glands; scents of the medicine cats. The half-moon had not been that long ago. While she had been thinking, Sunpaw had lagged behind a little. As if this damaged her dignity somehow, she spurred herself on, her muzzle directly behind Lightningstar's tail as he padded lightly down a steep, rocky slope bare of grass.
Her pulse quickened as the ocean appeared from around a sharp bend in the slope. The strange, gray-and-white birds called seagulls reeled overhead, making no attempt to break away from the strong wind currents. Tiny brown birds, no taller than halfway up Sunpaw's leg, skittered along where the waves lapped at the nearly-white sand. Rainpaw squeaked with excitement, and Icepaw's long, feathery tail waved banner-like in the wind. Sunpaw realized that both her friends had been here only once before, just over two moons ago on their first day as apprentices.
"We will rest here until sundown," said Lightningstar, and he settled down on a wide, flat stone that sat just off the rocky path. Sunpaw jumped down from the slope and trotted down the sand, holding her tail in the air. She really needed to find a way to get down here more often; it was just so different from the forest, and she liked the change of surroundings.
With a slight prickle, she thought she really knew why she liked it down here: she was away from the Clan, separate from other cats. She was half-loner, after all, and occasionally felt entirely out of place with many other cats surrounding her. Out here, with so much open space, she felt more alone, more independent. The urges to go off on her own, break away from the Clan, were uncommon and surfaced randomly, so randomly she didn't even fully understand what set off the urges.
As the sun sank closer and closer to the crashing waves, to the point of almost being consumed by them, Sunpaw was aware of how similar her pelt was to the sky in color. Fiery reds and blazing golds streaked across the horizon, with little dark smudges of cresting waves interrupting it now and then.
Swivelling her ears, she heard Jaywing calling them back over to the slope. As she went to rejoin the others, she wondered for the first time: Was it my father who named me for the blazing sky at sundown? My father, Alexander, who I have yet to meet? Her father's strange name was difficult for her to pronounce in her mind, let alone out loud.
A last ray of sun caught Lightningstar in the face, striking his yellow eyes to a glow. In the fading light, Sunpaw saw him beckon with his tail. He stepped up a rise in the rocky path, and Sunpaw saw a sort of curving dip in the cliff face. Reaching the top of the slope, she saw a gaping hole. Deep inside, she could already see a slight silvery glimmer. The ocean had swallowed up the sun, and the climbing moon already shed light on the beach.
She felt Rainpaw quivering with either anticipation or excitement beside her. Icepaw walked shoulder-to-shoulder with his mentor Jaywing, his ear pricked rigidly forward as though expecting enemies to pounce out.
As he five cats walked through the cave, both sound and scent of the ocean faded into nothing. Cool, damp scents of moss and stone filled the air around them as the glow of what Sunpaw knew to be the Silverstone intensified.
It took them longer to reach the stone itself than Sunpaw had expected. As Lightningstar led them around a final bend, Sunpaw, Icepaw, and Rainpaw stopped dead, having never seen anything like it before.
There, sitting a circular chamber with moss-coated walls, was the Silverstone. Nearly three tail-lengths high and as many wide, it shone with a brilliance that was both cold and warm at the same time. Lightningstar's black patches paled to mist-gray; Jaywing's blue-gray coat was given a new shine; Rainpaw's white fur shone almost painfully, her dark gray tail turned much paler; Icepaw glimmered like the stone itself. Looking down at her forelegs, Sunpaw saw her own fur had been bleached silver.
As she raised her head, Sunpaw saw a round gap in the cave ceiling where the moonlight shot in. When she looked at the Silverstone again, the getting-to-be-familiar whisperings flooded her mind.
Fluttering of wings, rushes of wind, murmurings of muffled voices.
Lightningstar stepped up to the stone and, looking as if he were bowing at first, sank to his belly. Pressing his nose against the rock, Sunpaw watched as the rise and fall of his flanks slowed.
Almost immediately after her leader fell asleep, images flowed into Sunpaw's mind. Refraining from yowling at this with immense trouble, Sunpaw forced herself to sit still and watch the images flash past in her mind's eye. Brief pictures flashing, each leaving an imprint on her mind.
She saw Icepaw standing before her, but he was older, undoubtedly a warrior. His dark blue eyes held a disturbing mix of anger, disappointment, and loss. As Sunpaw 'watched' him, he moved his mouth, then turned away. She could not catch his words.
The next image was of a tortoiseshell struggling to climb a steep hillside that was covered with a thick blanket of snow. The cold sky was a murky gray, and the weak leaf-bare light was fading. Harsh calls indicated the presence of crows. The tortoiseshell faltered as it fought to ascend higher on the hill.
A new image: Rainpaw, also obviously a warrior, grappled with a RiverClan cat. As the brief scene went on, Sunpaw saw more cats; RiverClan, ThunderClan, and Tribe. An older Pinepaw spat at Waterstar, RiverClan's leader, before reaching out and giving her Clan leader a blow to the head.
Next image: the black fox crouched beside the lake, her pale eyes glinting. In one fluid movement, she shot across the small clearing and landed on Morning, knocking the pale gray she-cat off her feet. Keeping Morning pinned flat, the fox barked in triumph.
And following that: Sunpaw stood alone in a vast cavern, the freezing darkness yawning on and on forever. A point of light appeared in the black, a point of light that drew rapidly closer until a magnificent, flame-pelted tom stood before her, his green eyes glowing. In a tone of deadly seriousness, he spoke to Sunpaw, his voice bouncing and echoing through the cavern.
"These are but few events of what will come to be. No action will change the outcome. Some things are inevitable." The cat paled, faster and faster, until only a ghost of himself remained. In a voice tinged with hope, he called, "Remember faith, Sunpaw. Your time will come."
With a jolt, Sunpaw was startled back to awareness as a crack of thunder sounded from outside. Lightningstar was already stretching, his yellow eyes both thoughtful and worried. Without a word, he waved his tail, indicating it was time to return to camp. As Sunpaw, Icepaw, Rainpaw, and Jaywing trailed after him, Sunpaw lingered for a moment, letting Icepaw get a bit ahead of her. Of all the flashes of the future she had seen, the image of Icepaw turning away from her made her feel inexplicably sick.
Casting one last glance at the Silverstone, Sunpaw sent a silent message to StarClan: I have faith that you watch over us and help us, my warrior ancestors. But I do not believe that the future is as clear as you think it to be.
;-;-;-;
Personally, I think faith will either destroy us or save us.
–B.M.M.
A/N: As I've said, I'm not changing the landmarks created in Starlight. Oh yes, while it's on my mind, the cover for Twilight has been released, in case anybody didn't know. Go to Amazon or something and check it out.