How did I end up in here? How?! I've been arrested for prostitution. Now I was in a cell with criminals. All of them were frightening.

I already made a phone call to my parents. They were coming as soon as they can.

"Austin, you're free," said the guard.

"Thank, God," I said.

"Not you. The other Austin."

A woman passed by me and said in a male voice, "Honey, don't ever do this kind of prostitution."

Being here all alone with these dangerous criminals made me scared. What if they beat me up? What if they rape me? I'm pretty sure about the giant steroid-infused biker because he's been eyeing for the past ten minutes.

"Moon!" called the guard. "You got some visitors."

A familiar redhead and brunette came in.

"Dez!" I yelled. "Rosie!"

"Austin, don't worry," said Dez. "Your parents are on their way."

"How can they arrest you just now?" asked Rosie. "When my friends and I were throwing a trash house party, I got chased by the police. I ripped my pants from climbing a fence, got bit in my right ankle by a pitbull, and jumping into a pool. Fuck, I've done it all."

"Rosie, they didn't even put Casey Anthony or George Zimmerman in jail," I said. "But they'll put the person who hit Kim Kardashian with flour in jail."

"I know," said Dez. "Is scary to be with all of these criminals? It's like they're…insane and hideous."

A scary-looking bald guy yanked Dez by the collar and growled, "What you say about us, Red?"

"Nothing at all, sir," Dez stuttered.

"You wanna fight, Prissy Boy?"

"No, I don't know how to."

"Back off, man," I interrupted. "He wasn't even talking about you."

"Stay out of this, Barbie!"

"Hey, Bigfoot," yelled Rosie. " You wanna fight with somebody, you fight with me but I warn you I did time in Attica."

"That's a men prison, sweetheart," he hissed at Rosie.

"I know. I've been there for a year until they found out."

At last he let go of Dez and said, "Sorry, ma'am." He walked away.

"She comes in handy," I commented to Dez.

Finally, my parents arrived.

"Austin Monica Moon," said Mom. "Arrested for prostitution?"

"I can explain everything," I said. "I'm innocent!"

" I know that," said Dad. "I just can't believe these dumbass cops would think people would wanna pay money to sleep with you!"

"Dad!"

"It's true."

"Mike, cut it out," said Mimi. "Austin, what the hell have you been doing this entire time?! Making money by having sex?! I'm so ashamed of you. Why would you do this?"

"I wasn't even having sex," I confessed. "I took girls out on dates. That's it. Ally was the only one I had sex with."

"Aww," cooed Mom. "You lost your virginity to Ally. That's so romantic. You were each other's first."

"Not exactly," Dez blurted out.

"Wait, what?" asked Dad. "Austin, what is he talking about?"

"Uhh…" I said. "Dad, Mom, back in Kendall…I was a slut."

"I knew he would be like you, Mike," said Mom. "I'm not that surprised."

"Awesome parents," said Rosie. "I wish my parents were yours."

The guard came back and began to open the cell. "Moon, you're released," he said.

"Thank God," I murmured.

"We will see you in court on Thursday."

"Thursday? Court?"

"Yes and you better get a good lawyer."

I looked at my parents, Rosie, and Dez. "What are we going to do now?" I asked.

"Austin, don't worry," said Dad. "We will settle everything, alright?"

"If you need a lawyer, Austin, my uncle's a lawyer," said Dez.

"Really?" I asked.

"Yeah, he's really great. He went to Harvard. Here's his card." Dez handed Mom a business card.

"Dez, thank you so much," said Mom. "You are as much of a son to me as Austin it is."

"Just give him a call and he'll get right to it."

My case was starting. This was scaring me to death. How can Dez's uncle get me out of this? He has even shown up yet.

"All rise for the honorable Judge Michael Bates," said the officer.

"Mr. Moon, where is your attorney?" asked Judge Bates.

"I don't know," I answered.

The doors opened. "I am here!" A voice yelled.

I turned around and saw him. Dez was in a business suit, fake glasses, and had briefcase in his hand. Rosie was behind him.

"Glad you can make it, Mr…"

"Desmond Fisherman, your honor," said Dez as he sat down next to me.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded.

"My uncle Leroy kinda fell and is in surgery," he answered. "But don't worry, Austin. I'm going to take care of this."

"Dez, I trust you on this. I hope you know what you're doing."

"He knows, Austin," said Rosie. "Hi!" She said aloud. "Rosie, Dez's girlfriend."

"Hi, Ms. Rosie," said Judge Bates.

"Judge Bates, is that you? How you doing? How Mrs. Bates and the kids?"

"They are well. Have you been checking in with your parole officer, young lady?"

"Trinese is taking time off."

"Her boyfriend dumped her again?"

"Yep."

"Good, he's a yutz. Now where were we? Oh, yes, Austin Monica Moon. Seriously? Monica?"

"Ask my parents," I said. "They say it was suppose to be Matthew."

"Lets see prostitution. I didn't expect someone like you to be doing this. Mr. Fisherman, proceed."

"You go, Dez," yelled Rosie. "Love you, Cupcake."

"Thank you, your honor," said Dez. "Before Austin lived in Miami, he was known as the Man-Whore of Kendall. Sex was his satisfaction, though none of his many lovers paid him."

"How can you prove that?"

"First of all, Austin, I'm sorry, but we had to do this."

"Do what?" I demanded.

"Your honor, may I present…Victoria, Regina, Sadie, Ella, Naomi, Willow, Scarlet, Jean, Holly, Claire, Zoey, Olive, Kristen, Trinity, Danielle, Vanessa, Abby, Isabelle, Mia, Veronica, Carrie, Jules, Sophia, Katie, Talia, Melanie, Mallorie, India, Felicity, Carly, Wendy, Deandra, Ida, Lacey, Josie, Eloise, Rosemary, Delilah, Tracy, Jill, Tiffany, Amanda, Raini, Lola, Dawn, Brenda, Vicky Jay, another Tracy, Lisette, Charity, Sarah, Alex, Cleo, Jamie, Madison, Erica, Jessica, Avalon, Azalea, Beverly, Molly, Violet, Nicole, Cory, Raven, Palmer, Monica, Phoebe, Judy, Lisa, Anna Marie, Ashley, Jordan, Chelsea, Irene, Peyton, Justice, Cameron, Yvette, Heidi, Logan, Stef, Iris, Arianna, Savannah, Gina, Sierra, Robin, Jacqueline, Chloe, Ivy, Lynette, Sydney, Noelle, Lilly, Beth, Becca, Annie, Lorie, Lexi, Presley, Liberty, Carol, Alice, Miranda, Fiona, Piper, Hayley, Lynn, Tiana, Samantha, Taylor, Selena, Leslie, Bree, Mona, Marissa, Hilary, Sasha, Jasmine, Sharon, Hannah, Danica, Kelly, Dakota, Terry, and Racquel." What?!

"Ladies!" Rosie snapped her fingers.

A crowd of girls walked into the courtroom. All of them were familiar. I knew every single one of them. Oh, my God. My ex lovers.