A/N: I know I have not updated this for, well, years but I have been busy. I hate to leave things halfway but I managed to regain motivation after reading a certain story online that took 8 years to complete. Haha I hope mine won't be that long though! And I am really sorry for the long wait so far (:

This chapter had been slightly edited to cut those long paragraphs into shorter paragraphs for ease of reading. But none of the content was changed, except for a few grammar mistakes which I corrected here and there.

If you're a new reader, hope the new paragraphing helps! For the old readers, you don't have to reread this chapter, no new things were added. I promise to finish this story, one way or another, but do bear with me as I have a couple of important things in my life now (i.e. I'm sitting for my A Levels this year) so updates would not come that fast. Thank you for reading my really cheesy story though ;)

Big coward

Sherwayne's POV

2 weeks later, day of the concert in Oklahoma, 10.11am

"Guess WHAT!" Natasha screamed when she entered my room. Luckily I was awake and doing some cleaning up in my room, or I would have to kill her for the rude way of waking me up on a Monday.

"Let me guess, Nick Jonas just called you and asked you to marry him?" I said in the same tone she had but more sarcastic.

"I wish. But anyway, remember when I told you I have to accompany my little cousin Amy to the Hannah Montana concert today in Oklahoma? I was so saddened when I found out Jonas Brothers may not be playing at the concert cause they are taking a rest starting this week but the word just got out that they decided to take their 6-days rest starting tomorrow instead of today! So you know what that means?" Oh no here it comes. I prepared myself for a loud screaming by sitting on my bed with my ears covered by my hand.

"I'M GOING TO SEE JONAS BROTHERS IN CONCERT! !" Natasha was doing her happy dance. She really do love Jonas Brothers.

I went back to cleaning up my room when she plopped down on my bed, tired of happy-dancing. We, mostly Natasha, were talking about the concert she's going to go that day when suddenly her phone rang.

"Hey Aunt... Yes, I'm still going... What? You can't?... A fever?... oh well... Ok, I'll get back to you in a few minutes" She put down her phone and turned to me.

"Sher, I know you're my bestest friend and you'll be there for me whenever I need help right?" She started. She only says this when she needs a favor.

"What do you want?" I asked while I sat beside her on my bed.

"My aunt has fever and she can't drive us to the concert. So, can you drive us instead?" She looked at me with her puppy dog eyes. I really wonder how she can pull it off so well at the age of 16. Yes, she is 2 years younger than me.

"Why don't you drive? It's not like you don't have your license."

"I can't. My aunt wants me to get someone else to drive as later after the concert we will be very tired and she doesn't want me to fall asleep while driving back. Pleaseeee." Again with the begging face.

"I am so sorry Tasha. I really can't. I want to rest and I have to have a last minute check on the party details. How about you ask Christina or Martin?" Well I lied. I am just not ready to look at the boys who I knew so well. Especially that one boy that made the stupid promise and never fulfil it. I was the loner kid for a while until I met Christina, Natasha and her older brother, Martin. I was convinced that I would never be reminded about the Jonas' anymore, especially him but God had to hate me so much and make Natasha find out about them when they first started out. Why life is so unfair, I will never know. But I guess I just have to accept the fact that my bestest friend is their biggest fan.

"What's with you and JB? You never go with me to their concert before. You never want to follow me to any of their meet and greets. I was a fan of them since they just started out 3 years ago but my bestfriend for 9 years have never even given them a chance to listen to their music. What is wrong with you? You're always making up reasons not to do something related to them with me. Why do you hate them so much?" She screamed at me. Natasha is now standing with her hands on her hips. I feel really bad. If only I have the courage to tell her the truth.

"Tasha, listen. It's not like that."

"Than what? You had past relationship with them? One of them broke your heart?"

I just kept quiet, tears forming in my eyes. I can't let myself cry. I never cried before for the past few years as I was determined to never cry again after they left my life. Slowly, a tear rolled down my cheek. The sight of this made Natasha soften. She realised she had just hurt her bestfriend's feelings over some boyband. She chose 3 guys that don't even know of her existence over her own bestfriend. Suddenly I felt a pair of arms wrapped around me.

"Omg Sher. I am so sorry that I yelled at you. Please don't cry. Where is the strong girl that never cried before that I have always known. Sorry-sorry-sorry-sorry-sorry. I didn't know it was a sensitive topic to you. I really am very sorry." I wiped the tears that had rolled down my cheeks with the back of my hands and looked up. I smiled a real smile to her to tell her it's ok. She suddenly hugged me unexpectedly.

"You know what. What you said was true. I should give them a chance. I will drive you to the concert." I said when we pulled away.

"Now that is what I have been wanting to hear for years. Come on. We have to get ready. We have to pick Amy up at her house by 4 and her house is in Oklahoma and also 1 hour away from the concert venue. Not to mention the journey from here to her house would be 3 hours." she said standing up.

"Yes mummy. But I don't really have to dress up. I am not going to be the 16 years old girl that they're going to see at the concert at 2nd row with a 9 years old girl named Amy" I said with a wide grin.

"Yeah yeah. That means you have to get ready fast and then follow me home and help me get ready. W-" she was talking when suddenly her phone rang. She looked at her phonescreen and suddenly her face became alarmed.

"Shit! I forgot to call my aunt!" She quickly pressed the send button and put the phone on her left ear. "I am so sorry... Yeah... Sherwayne is driving... Yeah... She is very responsible... Don't worry, she's legal by tomorrow too...Haha... Oh ok... Cool... I will... Bye."

"My aunt says happy early birthday and drive carefully. Oh one more thing, don't start smoking once you're legal."

"Tell her I said thanks and I won't."

"OK, enough with the chit-chattering. You have to get ready now! You have 40 minutes missy!" She said pushing me into my bathroom and shoved my towel to me that she grabbed along the way. I started laughing and just closed the door and started showering to get ready for today.

13 hours later, 11pm

So here I am, driving on a road back to Dallas thats not used by anyone at this hour. According to Natasha, the concert was "fantastilistically-absolutely-super-duperly the best". She has been talking about it for the past hour after we dropped Amy off at her house. Luckily she got tired and fell asleep. I still have 2 hours of driving till I reach my house so I turned up the volume of my radio to keep me awake.

As I was driving, my thoughts went back to the Jonas boys. How we first met because I tripped over a box of theirs while I was walking pass their house when they just moved in to the vacant house beside mine, also the memories we made with each other before they had to move after 5 years.

A few minutes have passed and I looked at the time and it was closing to 12am. 4 more minutes to be exact. I smiled. 4 more minutes till my birthday. I have a big feeling its going to be different this time.

An outline of a big black bus appeared about 500 metres in front of my car. At the same time, the radio played a song by someone I never had the courage to try listening to before. Yes, you guessed it right. The Jonas Brothers. It was their "When You look Me In The Eyes" song. The bus was driving slower than me so I caught up with it quite fast.

It was by the 2nd verse of the song that I found myself 2 metres away behind the car. We were driving smoothly for a few seconds when suddenly all I can see was bright red and white lights infront of me before it all turned black and the last thing I heard was screaming, braking of vehicles and screeching of tires.

After that, I found myself at a field full of roses. I was wearing a really pretty white dress and was jumping and running around the field. I noticed the field was never ending and after a few minutes, I find myself lying on the grass with my favourite flowers around me. I looked up at the clouds and smiled when I saw figures of the animals formed by it. Bunnies, cats, dogs, horses, any animal, just name it. It's very calming.

Then suddenly I felt the ground beneath me started shaking. And then suddenly I felt a rope like stuff tying me down to the ground. I looked at what it could possibly be and to my surprise, it was roots. I tried sitting up but my torso was tied down too. What was happening, I don't even know. The bright blue sky turned black and the clouds vanished.

I tried asking for help but nothing was coming out of my mouth. I tried screaming but still nothing. This went on for what seemed like hours when it was just merely minutes when I heard a voice talking to me. It belonged to a guy who could be more than 18 years old. It was quite deep but not very. It was very soothing to my ears but I can't figure out who it belongs to.

"Hey Sherwayne. I don't know if you can hear me but the doctor said I should try talking to you, maybe you would wake up. For the past years, my life hasn't been the same. Eventhough I may still be the funny guy everyone knows, I never felt full. I felt like I had lost a part of me when I moved out of here.

At first, i can't figure out why I was feeling this way. I thought I just missed Dallas but a year passed and I was still feeling the same. I was just 9 then and I tried thinking of what I miss from Dallas but nothing came up, except for one. I had everything in New Jersey and some were better. The only thing that was missing was this particular person that I was very attached to when I was still in Dallas. That's when I figured out that I had developed a feeling for the person who I left.

I wanted to write to her but I didn't know how to send a letter. I wanted to call but I didn't have her number. I was a big coward. I didn't dare to ask for help. I was afraid people would laugh at me. I just kept my feelings to myself.

Over the years as I became a teen, I told myself that I would forget about her and just carry on with my life especially when Nick got a record deal. I dated some girls too but no one was like what I was looking for. I thought I was over her and moving on but instead, I ended up finding people just like her. I thought maybe someone could replace her but I was so wrong. No one could.

When the three of us were signed to Columbia records, we wrote a few songs and I secretly wanted to write something of you. One day my brothers came up with an idea to write of maybe about a girl who is an underdog and lives beside us. This immediately made think of her. Most of the song was written with my lyrics. It was the first and the last time I was so engaged to a song while writing it. I was hoping maybe one day she would hear it and know that it was about her but until now, I can't figure out if she did hear it.

When we were on tour with Aly and AJ, I dated AJ but it again, didn't feel right. A year and a half passed and I found myself singing on a stage infront of thousands of screaming girls. I had my whole family on tour. We were touring from states to states, opening for various artists. We had moved to a big house in Los Angeles and our second record was a huge success. Our second single became chart-topping and our fanbase grew by thousands.

It was a dream of my brothers and I to have all of this and everyone thinks we must be so happy with everything we do and have but for me, I still felt lost. Something was still missing. No, make that someone. It was already more than 10 years but I was still waiting for a miracle to happen to bring me back to her. I wasn't thinking of her as much as last time but she was appearing once in awhile.

I never forgotten her birthday before and every year, I would make a card for her. I wanted to send it to her but never could. I didn't have her address and even if I had it, I wouldn't have the courage to send it. I had also written a bunch of letters for her about whats happening in my life over the years but it was still not sent. I keep all these cards and letters in a box at home and also some of the recent ones in a small box in my suitcase. One day, i would give all of it to her but I just don't know when.

Sherwayne, what I'm trying to say is that stay strong. try your best to wake up and have the courage to do it. Don't be a coward and not fight it. I was a big coward and still am. I really hope you can hear what I said and try to wake up. Ok, Sherwayne. I have to go. I hope to see and talk to the Sherwayne who's in a better state soon. I'll see you soon. Happy Birthday Sherwayne."

And that was it. The whole entire time I was crying. I was tied to the ground tightly and I can't find my voice. The whole surrounding was still black and when I heard his last few sentences, it struck me. I didn't want to be like this forever. I can't be a coward and not fight all of this. I have to be strong and fight for what I want, what I need.

With all the strength I had, I pulled my hands up and tore the roots and my hands were free. I pulled on the roots tying my body down and was unsuccessful at first but I kept trying till I could. After sometime, I was free. I was able to stand up. I stood up and looked around. The whole field was filled with dead roses and grass. This made me very upset. With all the effort I put in to be free but when I succeeded, nothing in the surrounding changes.

Tears started forming up in my eyes and slowly they started rolling down my cheeks. A drop of my tear fell to the ground below me and to my surprise, slowly the grasses started to turn back to green. The roses were blooming again and the black sky was turning the light blue it was originally.

I felt myself smiling a really big smile. I looked up at the sky and closed my eyes. The same smile was still on my face. I felt a light breeze pass by me and sounds of laughter and giggling could be heard. I looked infront of me and saw a small boy and a small girl chasing each other on the field. They were laughing and having so much fun. I looked closer and noticed that the girl was me. This could only mean the boy was him. A look closer confirmed that it was him. Again, the smile appeared on my face and happy tears were coming out of my eyes and the last few words I remembered saying was:

"I love you Joseph Adam Jonas"

Phew, that was quite a long one. Took me 2 hours to write.I know its not a day yet but I just felt like putting this up. (:

So, what do you think? Was it bad or good? Please review. I wanna know what you think will happen next.

Thank you!