The Gerda is once again coursing over the vast ocean.
She glides through the water as though she is a knife cutting through the water's seams.
Her bowsprit points North, as if she is pointing and declaring to all the crew, "This way! I know this is the way we need to be sailing!"

We have been on the boat since departing from Arendelle, which was quite some time ago.
Time seems to blend together so it is rather hard for me to say for sure, but I would guess that it has been a couple of months.
Since setting off from Inuitia, however, a strange new atmosphere has come over the ship.
Something seems to lurk in the shadows, something dark and ominous. What this something is I know not. I can merely feel uncertainty churning within me.

The crew seems to have become much more unpleasant than usual. They have a coldness in their eyes that wasn't there before; or if it was I was not aware of it until now.

I am becoming weaker and weaker with each passing day, as my cells are freezing one by one with every passing second.
I often find myself in my room hardly able to do much more than lie on my bed.
I still try to build up enough energy to walk around on the upper deck as much as I can. I worry because the outside air is becoming too unbearable for me.

Hemmin maintains our story-telling routine.
I am very grateful for this. I enjoy listening to her as her stories take me to places I can no longer go myself. Admittedly, I do wish that she wouldn't tell her tales quite so emotionlessly. They would be breathtaking if they were told in a voice that matched the beauty of the story.
Nevertheless, as I have already stated, I am grateful.

I sit myself up from my reclined position. I do this very slowly and very carefully, as my body is fragile.
I manage to get to my feet. I take a cautious step. It feels as though I am walking on a path of icicles.
I walk along this path to my door and out to the upper deck, each step piercing through me.

Conceal. Don't feel.

Upon reaching the upper deck, I see that Ember is pacing in solitude at one of the far sides of the Gerda.
I go to him, slow and steady.
He stops pacing as he becomes aware of my presence.

"I have not seen you for quite some time."
"I've been in my room." I don't give any further explanation.
"Something seems off." He comes closer and whispers this to me, so as not to be overheard. "Do you feel it, too?"
"Yes."
He tilts his head in the direction of two crew mates nearby. They seem to be murmuring to each other, although I cannot make out any specific words. I take note that they occasionally look my way; this gives me reason to think that I am the subject of their conversation.

"Perhaps we should have stayed behind in Inuitia." I sigh. "They could've sailed back to Arendelle without us and we could've tried getting an Inuit ship to take us to the top of the world."
"I couldn't have gone to Inuitia with you." He replies. "The whole kingdom would've been nothing but a puddle of water."

I feel confusion starting to creep back into me.

"It doesn't matter now anyway." Ember goes on. "We are on the Gerda and we must worry about the difficulties right in front of us."
He looks into my eyes. "Elsa, be careful."
He turns and walks away.
I feel a familiar warmth within me.
Somehow, this warmth makes me feel much colder.

Ember had been in Inuitia. He had walked right alongside me. I know for a fact that he had. I am not going crazy... I couldn't be.
But if Ember had actually been with me, why did he say that he hadn't?
Why did I feel cold when he left me then, but warmth now?

There are far too many questions that I do not have the answers to.
I would love to tell you that I have the energy to keep pondering this mystery, but I honestly don't.
I feel exhaustion grip me and I know that I must retire back to my room.

I take a few industrious steps back across the upper deck.
One of the crew mates on swabbing duty knock into me. Something about the look in his eye tells me that it wasn't an accident.
He grunts.
"Excuse me." I say, trying to be polite. I sidestep around him and continue on toward my room.

As soon as I reach my suite, I stumble inside and onto my bed.
I fall into my pillows.
I stay here for a great deal of time, my body moaning in anguish.
My mind wanders off into a place of delusion.
This place is twisted and confused.
It plays around in my mind, as if it were merely a child tangling pieces of sewing string into a matted mess.
The delirium takes me back to my old bedchamber in Arendelle.

Knock. Knock.
"Elsa?"
It is Anna's voice; it seems so very far away, yet so very near.
"Please, I know you're out there
I have been wondering where you've been
You said, 'let me go', and I let you go
I want you to come home, please don't give in
I hope that you remember, that I'm waiting here
I pray that you would know
That I want to build a snowman."

I would give anything to build a snowman with you, Anna, but it is just too cold.