The Honor of a Knight

It was funny how quickly the tides and favors of court changed depending on the person that was in question. One would think that, in being a knight, that most would honor and respect said knight merely because of the title bestowed upon him. One would think that, should the knight dishonor and disrespect the title in doing deeds unbefitting their title…only THEN would the other knights turn on such a man, much like they had Urry. And one would think that the most experienced of men would have the greatest respect from those younger than them.

One WOULD expect that, and one would be wrong.

Camelot never ceased to amaze Marayna with how backwards it was.

It seemed that Uther had been quite invigorated by his duel with 'the Black Knight' and had been talking about the battle for ages now. He'd gone on and on about how it reminded him of being on the field of battle, something he had not done since before Arthur was born, at least against true enemies. They all knew he'd gone to war against sorcerers in the past, well, they SAID go to war…really they were quite sure it was more him laying siege to innocent villages and pulling men, women, and children out of their homes…but that was besides the point.

The point of the matter was that the king had been so enraptured with the pride he'd felt in besting Tristan and winning a seemingly impossible match that he'd considered hosting another tournament. The servants were all thrilled about that, truly, they were just oh so thrilled that they'd have to host even more knights and clean up all the blood off the walls of the arena once more. Oh the tournaments were always fun to watch, there was nothing more amusing than two grown men beating at each other with swords, at least to Marayna. She was of the impression that men would rush into battle, act and react accordingly and fight to their last breath any opponent that crossed their path. She was also of the opinion that women's battles never lasted so long or were quite so bloody due to the women planning out what they'd do before they actually did it. They observed, came up with a plan, and implemented it. They didn't just react and act but looked around and observed the best way to attack, they thought WHILE they were attacking.

But it had been something that Uther was determined to see happen and had sent out word for the new tournament. There was just one small detail that made it different than the other tournaments Camelot had hosted in the past…it was for those knights who were around Uther's age. It seemed his hope to have other knights that most would deem too old or perhaps 'retired' from their duties compete and see if they still had it in them. Uther himself would not be competing though, merely observing. They honestly hadn't expected many men to actually show up, but a surprising amount had.

Merlin and Marayna had been tasked with cleaning out the rooms again, though, thankfully, they were still rather clean from the last batch of men who had visited Camelot and hadn't needed much doing to be ready for the next inflow. They'd both talked about this particular tournament and their honest shock that so many men had taken up the challenge to compete. Neither of them could fathom it, wanting to get back in the arena after they had lived their lives out. It was their opinion that, having spent their life on the battlefield, seeing so much death and carnage and destruction in war, having had to prove themselves over and over, that the knights who had managed to live that long…that they'd just want peace after that. They didn't understand why they'd go back and strap on the armor and pick up their swords again just for a tournament. Hadn't they had enough fighting in their lives? Hadn't they already proven themselves worth of their titles? And what would happen to those who lost? Would their honor be tarnished? Would they be seen as less of a knight that they couldn't keep fighting?

It just made no sense to them at all that Uther would do this to the knights that were, by rights, too old to be expected to fight that hard once more. Arthur insisted a knight was never deemed so, they were expected to live their entire life by the code and die by the code and always be prepared to take up the position of knight of the realm once more when Camelot needed them. Many of the older knights had gone on to have children, sons who had become knights themselves, had become sort of instructors in swordplay and other areas of battle, advisors and whatnot. They'd built lives outside of being knights and lived them.

Merlin and Marayna just…they didn't understand why anyone would subject themselves to a tournament and to being beaten and injured just to prove themselves when they didn't have to, when they had already proven themselves. But then again…they had to admit they were much the same in their magic. No matter what, no matter who knew, they were always trying to prove themselves, to prove that they were GOOD and that magic wasn't evil. Even though Morgana and Gwen were well aware of that fact, given that they hadn't gone screaming to Uther about them the moment they found out, they STILL tried to do as much good with magic around them as they could, to try and reaffirm in a way that magic could be innocent and helpful. It was just…their entire lives they'd been told it was evil, left to think they were monsters so…perhaps it was more to prove it to themselves that they weren't evil on the inside.

And if that was the case, then they supposed the knights wanting to fight made sense, they were trying to prove it to themselves that they were still capable and still deserving of the title of 'knight.'

Which brought Marayna back to her thoughts as she stood against the castle wall, watching as Arthur ran the older knights through a bit of refresher training, just going through basic steps and positions, more to try and relax the nervous knights with some familiar things of the past. Her attention though, wasn't on Arthur, but on an older knight. The man was truly the oldest one there, his hair white, his face wrinkled, his blue eyes tired and holding wisdom. He reminded her of Gaius, if her were more 'bulky' and had shorter hair and just a firmer face. He was also a knight, she knew, had the absolute worst reputation of them all.

Or at least that was what he'd used to have.

That man had been, in his youth and even more so in his adulthood, just one step below the man Urry was it seemed. He'd been arrogant, the one who always picked a fight at the slightest injustice or insult against him, willing to humiliate others to make himself appear better. He had no concept of friendship, he had no concept of true chivalry if the stories about how many women he'd gone through were to be believed, and he'd had no concept of honor. He was a brute, he used his sword and status to get what he wanted and he fought his way through any who stood in his way.

He reminded her of a more forceful and eager to fight Arthur, the Arthur she'd met when she'd first arrived in Camelot though. Arthur had been arrogant and rude and crass and thought himself better than everyone merely because he was the prince. He'd gotten better, he had, but…so had the knight as well.

Sir Lucan had been the rudest, most arrogant, most brutish knight in the realm for a time…and what shocked Marayna to learn was that it had been encouraged! All the knights that had been around the man during that time had loved it. They thought he was the most magnificent example of a knight there was. They praised his exploits, they glorified his battles, they sang songs of his conquests…it was sickening how much the man's terrible qualities were seen as those worthy of a true knight. No one had seen anything wrong with how he'd acted, no one had tried to stop him or oppose him, they all thought him the best knight in the realm.

She had no idea how that was possible.

Lucan was everything a knight was NOT meant to be, or at least everything that, if Arthur's extolling were to be taken as gospel, a knight should fight against. Lucan was everything that Arthur despised and had seen in Urry when the man had been banished. She couldn't say she'd ever heard a tale where Lucan had beaten a woman, but he did instigate quite a few fights, disguised a few as being a challenge or a duel even when all involved knew that the opponent had no chance at all of besting him. She couldn't understand how all the knights in the realm were so taken with Lucan that they'd looked past so many of his faults. She could guess that, for Arthur, it was because he was the prince, but Lucan was just another son of another noble, nothing dangerous in the least.

And that was why she didn't understand how they treated him now.

Because Lucan…he wasn't that man anymore. Marayna was quite pleased she'd never had to meet the version of Lucan that all the knights boasted about and spoke of so reverently. The man she'd met had been quiet, soft spoken, polite and cordial. He'd spoken with her as though she were his equal, greeted her warmly when he arrived, her and Merlin. Merlin had been assigned to tend to the man as his servant for his stay and…she had never heard Merlin speak so highly of someone so quickly. Lucan had refused to let Merlin carry his heaviest bags with his armor in it, claiming it was his to wear and his to care for. He'd invited Merlin to rest with him after settling into his rooms, offered him the food and drink that had been set up there and excused him the rest of the day. He'd laughed with Merlin and joked with him and, when Merlin had offered to start a small fire in the fireplace of the room for him, the man had just waved him off and reminded him that he was a knight, he was used to sleeping on the hard ground and starting fires of his own and that he could do it himself.

Merlin had been stunned, he'd told her later, literally stood there for a moment or two just blinking at the man. Arthur was the same, he could sleep on the cold hard ground, he could light his own fire, and yet he made THEM to everything. He'd actually stood there long enough to watch as Lucan did just that, lit his own fire and settled down in a small chair to polish his own armor.

That was NOT the Lucan that they had heard such talk about, the Lucan who ordered servants about and kicked them if they were too slow, who went through so many that he wasn't pleased with that to be with the man for a month was an accomplishment. They honestly would have thought that Arthur had made up the tales of the man and how he was if not for hearing all the other knights at different times speaking of the same sort of events.

What bothered her was that the knights spoke so highly of the Lucan of the past and were so…harsh and cruel about the Lucan of the now. This Lucan, the one who had greeted her and Merlin, who had been so kind to her brother…he was looked down upon by the knights. And she didn't understand that! THIS Lucan embodied the knights' code so much more than he had in the past and yet all the knights treated him as though he'd lost his mind or had gone soft. It was ridiculous! He was honorable now, kind, understanding, he helped those around him no matter their station and he never used his title for power over others like he had in the past.

The knights whispered, she heard it, they shot him little looks, all of it clearly saying that they thought the man ill-fitting to be a knight, that they hoped he wouldn't win the small tournament, because he no longer deserved the title of knight given his new outlook on life and treatment of others.

And that was why she and Merlin were so determined to see him win.

Because a man like that, who had started off so arrogant and had grown to be, truly, one of the best men in the realm…he deserved to win. He WAS a knight, he was everything a knight was supposed to be, and even more than that…he gave them hope that one day Arthur would be the same. And it wasn't just them basing their opinions on observations of just his first day there, no…Gaius had told them stories of Lucan as well.

Lucan, apparently, had been one of Uther's closest friends as children, had grown up together and trained together, which did explain his arrogance they thought. Gaius had been a member of their small group when he'd arrived in Camelot to study medicine. The two were getting injured in their mock duels so often that the attending physician at the time had gotten so unamused he would just have Gaius tend to them every time. It had created a very close friendship for the three of them, to trust someone else with helping you recover had made Gaius an instrumental part of their little trio. And, as a result, he'd seen firsthand what Lucan was like. So when even Gaius had told them of how the man had been in the past…they listened and they believed him.

But, unlike others, Gaius was…the most pleased with the man Lucan had become. He still kept in contact with the man, met with him once or twice a year when he could afford to leave for a short while just to meet the man and renew their friendship. Lucan had left Camelot years ago to live a simpler life in one of the outer villages. It had seemed strange to them, that a man like him would give up the luxury of castle life for one like that…but Gaius had explained to them something no one spoke of…Lucan and Uther had had a terrible falling out ages ago. Lucan had detested the sight of his one-time friend and left, putting as much distance as he could between Uther and him while still remaining in the borders of the kingdom as knights were NOT meant to abandon the kingdom and the king they had sworn allegiance to.

None of the other knights spoke of the falling out, of how Lucan had come to seem to hate their king. No one spoke of it because they knew that the hate Lucan felt for Uther was matched in Uther to him as well and no one wished to bring up the other knight around the king or anywhere the king himself might hear them. They'd had to learn from Gaius that nearly 15 years ago everything had changed between the two men, that Lucan and Uther had had their fiercest row ever and Lucan had left. It was then, at that point, that Lucan had turned his life around. He'd left Camelot and just…begun a new life as a new man. Gaius was truly shocked that the man had even decided to come to Camelot for the challenge. But he suspected the man thought a chance like this would not come around again and wanted one last moment in the arena.

They'd been curious though, as to just what had changed with Lucan and Uther that had made the man change so drastically, dislike the king so much…but Gaius refused to say. He just looked at them, at Marayna actually, for a long moment, the most solemn and grim expression on his face, before he shook his head, admitting he was unwilling to tell them, that it wasn't his place.

They still didn't know what had changed Lucan like that, but they were determined to not just find out what, but to help the man as much as he could to show he deserved the title he had. That being a good man instead of an arrogant prick was something better to be remembered for. They thought THAT might be the reason for Lucan to have come to Camelot this last time. The man was older, yes, but still had life to him, still had his strength. They knew though, that with age no one could ever determine how long that would last and that Lucan likely thought this was his last chance to prove that, despite his change, he was still one of the best knights in the realm.

"Mara!"

Marayna looked up, startled out of her thoughts when she heard Arthur calling for her and noticed that the practice had ended, the other knights already walking off, some towards their rooms, others towards town for a small pint of ale before the tournament the next morning, to celebrate being back in the arena once more. She shook her head and rushed over to where Arthur was standing by a small table that held the weapons, two other servants were there already, gathering up the weapons so she had no idea what Arthur needed her for.

"What is it?" she asked when she made her way over, seeing Lucan taking a sword and helmet from one of the servants, his own belongings, before she turned to Arthur.

"I need you to sharpen my sword, polish my armor, and mend the strap on shield," he held out a bundle of the armor already, having already had a servant remove it for him.

"Oh come now sire," Lucan laughed as he made his way over with his own armor, "She's only a wee girl, could you not possibly bring your own armor to the armory at least to assist her?"

Marayna smiled at the man's thoughtfulness, but reached out for the armor anyway, "It's alright Sir Lucan, I'm stronger than I look."

"She really is," Arthur agreed, a small smile on his face as he poked her in the side, "All muscle there…"

"Oi," Marayna jumped to the side from his poke, "Mind your hands Artie," she hit her hip to his, nudging him to the side before she walked off.

Lucan stood there a moment, most amused, as he watched the Crown Prince of Camelot watch his maidservant walk off with the softest of looks in his eyes and, what he would deem, one of the happiest, if small, smiles on his face, "Artie?" he had to inquired, laughing heartily when Arthur spun to him, flustered that he'd been caught in such a moment. But he merely walked past the prince, clapping him on the shoulder as he went, to follow the woman to the armory, his own armor needed a fair bit of work and what better place to do it than the armory. Perhaps the girl could give him some pointers for his own cleaning and mending for, despite having taken care of his armor the last 15 years…he still hadn't gotten the hang of it.

~8~

Marayna smiled as she sat in the armory across from Lucan, the two of them just polishing the armor, Lucan actually polishing ARTHUR's armor with her as they talked quietly. She'd insisted he hadn't had to do it, but when she'd helped him fix a small dent in the visor of his helmet he had all but insisted himself that he help her with Arthur's copious amount of armor.

"You are…not like the other knights, Sir Lucan," she remarked to him softly as they polished away.

He smiled at that, "You mean I am not like the knights usually portray me?" he guessed.

She shrugged, "I suppose," not taking back what she said or denying she'd heard differently about him, there was no point in lying about things, she believed, unless it was life or death (like with hers and Merlin's magic) or some bit of fun (like corrupting the prince to go gallivanting in the forest or telling him she'd knocked him out), "It is…hard to imagine you like they say you were."

He let out a soft sigh at that, "It is hard to believe that I WAS the way they said I was," he gave her a small smile, "Sometimes…it feels like the most terrible dream to remember how I used to be."

She looked at him a long while before taking a breath, wanting to at least attempt asking him something that had been niggling her and Merlin, "What…happened?" she began, "That…led to the change in you? All I've heard was that there was a row with Uther and you left, theories that the time away helped you…mature or something."

She would have been a bit more hesitant to say something like that, something that a knight could take offensive, to imply he'd been an immature brat before he'd left Camelot, but…she got a genuine sense off of Lucan that he wasn't that many anymore, that he really was as understanding as he seemed to be now and wouldn't take offense to a simple question.

Lucan was quiet though, quite a few minutes going by before he spoke, "My daughter," he answered.

Marayna blinked, she'd had…no idea that the man had a daughter, she hadn't even been aware he'd had a wife! But she kept silent, knowing that he would explain more if he wanted to, and if not that would be the end of it and there would be no point in asking him more questions. Lucan struck her as the open sort, the kind where, he would speak what he felt and if he didn't speak it meant he didn't wish to share.

"She would be…18, next month."

"Would be," she murmured to herself, a statement more than a question, a terrible pit falling into her stomach at the solemnity with which he'd spoken.

He swallowed, "Yes," he nodded, looking more at the armor he was absently polishing than her, "She was just a small girl, barely three years old, when I left Camelot. I left…because of her," he let out a sad laugh, "I left Camelot, because Camelot took her away from me and…if I stayed any longer…I would have taken the king from Camelot for compensation. "

"Uther didn't…" she shook her head, feeling tears in her eyes at that, at the implication of it all.

"My wife was…lost in the purge," Lucan admitted, "All she did was…have the odd dream here and there," Marayna stiffened, hearing something in the woman that was so much like Morgana, "When Uther worked out that her dreams came true…he thought she had magic. And no one is allowed magic in Camelot and lives," he swallowed, "Our daughter had only just been born when he made this discovery. He'd…he'd been about to…" he cleared his throat, "But Gaius convinced him that she was just a baby, that there was a chance she had no magic at all and that he could not kill an innocent baby," he let out a scoff, "Not that it stopped him from doing that to other mothers," he added bitterly under his breath, before inhaling, "Still, it appeared my friendship with him, the fact that she was MY daughter as well was enough to deter him. But…" he shook his head, "He never stopped watching her, my Rosaline, he never stopped waiting for the day where…she would do something or her eyes would flash gold," Marayna swallowed at that, at how the man knew of the signs of magic, "And one day…they did," he said simply, looking away from the armor to rest his head against the wall behind him.

"I should have known," he murmured, "Uther never sent me out to deal with bandits in the neighboring villages, but he did. He sent me away and…when I returned…the first thing I saw was my daughter tied to a pyre."

"Oh my god," Marayna breathed, to do that to a child! That was…that was monstrous.

"He wanted to set an example, to use her to do it," Lucan grew quieter, so quiet that she had to strain to listen, "That no one, not even the children of his dearest friends would be safe. That absolutely NO magic be allowed in Camelot, no exceptions."

Marayna looked down at that, as though, for the first time, realizing how truly dangerous it was for her and Merlin to be there. She supposed, in the back of her mind, she'd always thought that, because they were Gaius's niece and nephew, that they might be safe, or at least banished…but this…for Uther to have done that to a three year old girl, the daughter of one of his closest friends…it hit her hard that there was NO one they could rely on to save them should they be caught doing magic, no one at all.

"I was held back…" his voice cracked, "Uther made me watch."

Marayna looked up to see a tear fall from the man's eye though he hardly seemed to notice it.

"I confronted him, the guards holding me back though, they knew I'd kill him if I had the chance," he laughed bitterly, "I wouldn't have, I would have attacked just so they'd attack me and kill me instead. Killing the king wouldn't have brought my daughter back, but attacking him would have put me out of my misery and allowed me to be with her again."

Marayna let out a breath at that, that was…not quite a logic she expected a father to have after having seen his daughter burned to death, but…he was a knight, perhaps it was different? He'd grown up noble, he knew the inner workings of court, he knew the reactions of the guards, and he knew Uther, he knew life and death and everything that could be expected. Attack the king and the guards would attack and kill you no matter what, no matter who you were if you were truly attacking as though intending to kill. End up killed by the guards…no suffering.

"But Uther knew I'd do it, he still considered me a 'friend' even after what he'd done to me," he scoffed, bitter, "He looked at me as though he'd done me a service, as though he'd protected me from some great evil…she was only 3, she didn't know what evil was, how could she be it?" he shook his head, before taking a breath, trying to keep his thoughts on just the events of the past, "He held me back, stood there as I shouted curses and obscenities and threats to him. He grew irritated I was being so 'unappreciative' of his actions and threatened me with banishment. I challenged him to do it, but he refused, so I left," he shrugged, "I left, I HAD to leave. If I stayed, I would have murdered him, and then Arthur would be without a father, Camelot without a king, a power vacuum happening because of Arthur's age. I left and I went somewhere that…Uther hadn't corrupted yet."

He looked back down at the armor and started polishing again, "I saw the sort of man I was in Uther. I had followed orders, I HAD taken the lives of others, likely innocent magic users, because Uther ordered it. I hadn't seen them as people, but enemies of the crown. It wasn't till Rosaline that…that I saw how corrupt I was. And I didn't want to be that. Rosaline…" he smiled, "She looked at me with such pure love for her father, I was…I was her hero, I was the best man in the world to her. And looking back at how I acted…" he shook his head, "I wasn't worthy of that title."

Marayna nodded, wiping below her eyes as she tried not to cry, knowing that the tears would only cause the man more heartbreak to relive the story. She could tell it had to have taken much for him to speak of it to her, to tell her in the sanctuary of the empty armory his story. She understood now, why he'd changed, for his daughter, in her memory, to be a man deserving of the faith that little girl had had in him, to be a man she'd be proud of as she watched him from above.

"Thank you," she murmured, "For telling me. It couldn't have been easy."

He looked at her, as though just realizing he HAD told her everything, and offered her a smile, "You and the Lady Morgana…you look like her," he shrugged, "She had her mother's dark hair, more brown than black, and…my eyes," he gestured at his light blue eyes, trailing off in thought, "She would have been beautiful. I'd have been challenging every young man to an honor duel just to court her," he looked down, as though that had been the future he'd imagined when his daughter had been alive.

"Why come back then?" that was a question she HAD to ask though. As terrible as it was to say, to think or assume, but…she'd dealt with enough people how had a vendetta against Uther coming to try and kill his son to get to him. A life for a life, his daughter for Uther's son, it would make sense, but…if that was the case, she needed to know if Arthur was in danger.

She doubted he'd tell her the truth, but…if he lied, she liked to think she'd be able to pick up on that.

Lucan just looked at her, "I am not here to end Uther's life, or Arthur's," he stated outright, startling her at how open he was being, how blunt, "Taking Arthur from Uther will not return my daughter to me. Nor would killing Uther NOW do anything but enrage Arthur…"

"Now?" she blinked at that word.

He offered her a sad smile, "There were times I considered if it would have been better to truly try to kill the king when he'd dragged me before him," he admitted, "With Uther gone, there would have been a chance for Arthur to be raised differently, without a bias, without prejudice…but…" he shook his head, "I was still a knight of Camelot, I still had a duty to her, and to kill her king would not have protected the kingdom or helped."

"Then why…"

"I want Uther to see me, as I am now," he explained, "I have suffered, under his hand, I have lost things more precious to me than anything I have ever held dear. If I can return to face him…so too will others he's harmed. I am a better man now, for my daughter, I am stronger, I grew stronger in my anger and hatred of him, I had to, to defend those of the village I'd settled into," he gave her a pointed look and she nodded slowly, giving him a meaningful look back that she would not say a word, because apparently the village he'd settled into DID have some sort of magic to it, "As I am stronger, others will be stronger as well. I want him to see that, though I do not come with the intent to harm…others will."

"You're trying to warn him?" after having lost his daughter…that was not something she expected.

"No," Lucan shook his head, "I am offering myself as a promise to Uther. He has made many enemies, and they will come for him, one day. I am not a warning, I am not an enemy, I will not do anything more than fight in this tournament and win," he gave her a smile for that last belief, "And I will prove to him that those he thinks are in the past, will always resurface in the present."

Marayna nodded, "I think he may be aware of that," she warned him, "There have been…quite a few attacks on Camelot already."

"Forgive me for saying, but…you have not been in Camelot long," he reminded her, "The Great Purge lasted…years…and still lasts even now. Every day Uther gains new enemies in his madness. These past attacks…" he looked at her, serious, "They are only the beginning."

~8~

The tournament itself was a small one, composed of two parts though, jousting and combat. There had only been about 20 men who had come for Uther's challenge and, within two days, the tournament would be over. Combat had come first, each knight faced another in single combat with any weapon of their choice. The winners dueling each other until one man had been claimed the victor of the combat portion.

Marayna was THRILLED that it had been Lucan who had won. Though, she was worried as he'd barely managed it. His arm had gotten rather badly twisted in an effort for his opponent to get him to drop his sword, a sword he'd hung onto and managed to trip the other man, aiming it at his throat. But it was his lancing arm, the one he'd hold the lance in and she was worried for him. He'd been lucky in the combat. His opponents had all seemed to think him too soft and had started off 'easy' on him…only for him to have them on their backs in mere moments, using their underestimation to his advantage. None of the knights had been allowed to watch the others compete, to try and not offer anyone any sort of advantage in observing their opponents skills and techniques. So it had been in Lucan's best interest to take them out quickly when they tried to baby him through the first rounds.

Slowly though, his opponents had gotten wiser and started to fight harder, and he'd only barely won. Gaius had provided a salve to help the man's sore arm, but it didn't appear to be going very well for the man in the joust. He'd nearly been unhorsed twice so far and the tournament was only halfway over. He was growing tired, everyone could see it, his grip on his lance was slacking as his arm hurt him more and more and…the crowd was cheering when he got injured. Not just cheering their typical cheer of just enjoying the showdown, but cheering as though they were happy that particular knight had been harmed.

Marayna did not like it at all, nor did Merlin, or Gwen, or Morgana. After she and Lucan had finished the armor, she'd found her brother in Morgana's room with Gwen, the noblewoman appearing to be meditating, clearing her mind to try and help her sleep at night without the potion Gaius often gave her. They'd been trying to do some digging about Seers and Healers and see if there was anything they could do to help Morgana with her visions and magic. It seemed though, that knowing she had magic had actually helped her feel calmer when she had nightmares, she woke up not scared of them, though the content did frighten her at times, but more aware that they were warnings of a future she could try to change. She accepted them now and she seemed to be doing better, she was less shaky, less jumpy than they'd seen her be when she'd first had her horrible nightmares and not had a clue what they were.

But she'd interrupted them a bit to explain what Lucan had told her. She felt bad for sharing the story he'd told her in confidence with the other three, but if there were any in the castle that would keep quiet about it and help her help Lucan, it would be them. And help they had. Gwen had gone to help Lucan personally with his armor after each fight, mending it as good as new for the next one, which he appreciated. Morgana had even, before the tournament began, offered him a handkerchief as a token of good luck to wear as a favor, Merlin hadn't exactly been pleased as he knew that was what women often did with the knights they fancied…until Marayna pointed out that Lucan was old enough to be her father or even grandfather with how much older he appeared to be. Merlin himself had even helped in small ways, but more flittering around the other knights and…not sabotaging them…but if their sword wasn't exactly THEIR sword or their helmet wasn't slightly smaller than it should have been or slightly bigger…well…how would that affect their fighting if they were a true knight?

They didn't think of it as cheating, to help the man in little ways. As far as they were concerned he was the most, and only one, deserving of the title knight and to be the victor of the tournament. The other knights, from what they'd observed, did not embody what it meant to be one the way Lucan had come to. Yes, the man had been a right arse years ago, but right now…now he was truly a knight worthy of the title. And for that, they would do anything they could to help him.

Which was why she and Merlin were standing around the corner, watching as Lucan faced off with another knight, the last knight. It was the deciding joust, the next person to be unhorsed would be the victor. And they were NOT about to let Lucan down.

"Ready?" Merlin looked at his sister, holding out his hand.

She nodded, "Ready," she breathed, taking it as they focused on the tournament.

They had to be very careful with the magic they used, the magic they'd BEEN using the last half of the joust to help, making a glare a bit blinding, making a strap a bit loose, breaking a lance before it could really hit Lucan…very small but very very carefully done. They had to make the tournament look real, because it was all about honor, and if Lucan was caught to be cheating…he'd lose. And they did NOT want that, especially not after they'd learned that Lucan had been trying to help anyone with magic in his village to be safe.

They couldn't even risk incantations this time, with so many people around them, they were not going to risk anyone hearing them. With all eyes on the joust though, their eyes could flash gold and no one would know. And so they focused, and watched, and waited…till the jousters ran at each other on their horses, and squeezed their hands, their eyes flashing gold as the opponent's lance broke only a split second before it struck Lucan, Lucan's hitting the other knight dead on, unhorsing him!

The crowd, though a bit disappointed that Lucan had won, erupted into cheers that the tournament had been completed and that there was a victor. Lucan made his way off is horse and came to stand in the front of the small raised seats where Uther, Arthur, and Morgana were sitting as the king stood.

"Sir Lucan," he began, looking down at the man tensely, clearly not at all pleased that he had to bestow this tournament's victory to that particular man, "You are our victor for this tournament. As such, you have earned the reward of 5…"

"I don't want your coin," Lucan spoke up, the crowd falling silent as he not only cut the king off, but refused his prize as well, "I don't want your prizes. I don't want anything from you Uther…except the one thing you can never give me back."

Uther's jaw tensed at that, his eyes narrowing as he looked down at the man, his hand curling into a fist at the thought that Lucan would reveal his past actions.

"All I want," Lucan continued, "Is for you to realize…the past comes back to haunt us all."

And with that, he turned and strode out of the arena, confusing the crowd to an enormous degree as they all started whispering, wondering what the man meant, whereas the king himself stood there rigidly, having gone one or two shades paler, before he glared and slammed his fist against the ledge of the arena's wall and stormed off.

Morgana though, smirked at that, standing regally and walking off with Gwen, Merlin moving to help Gaius tend to those knights that were still injured. Marayna though, snuck out of the arena, looking around, only to see Lucan mounting a horse and trotting off, all of his belongings already packed on the horse. He'd planned to leave immediately after the tournament if he won. No one could ever guess what Uther would do or how he would interpret anything that could possibly be a threat against him, and he hadn't wanted to risk being there for Uther to attack.

She sighed as she watched him go, it was rather anticlimactic, the 'showdown' between Lucan and Uther, but those words, that one sentence…that would be enough to truly get to Uther, to truly worry him and, as Lucan intended, act as a promise of things to come. She could only hope that Uther wouldn't completely fly off the handle and go mad with paranoia because of it.

"I wonder what he meant," a voice said beside her as Arthur joined her, the two of them watching Lucan ride off.

"I dunno," she shrugged innocently, "Sounded like a promise to me."

He rolled his eyes, "What, that he'd come back and kill my father?" he scoffed, "Sir Lucan fails to realize he did break the law of Camelot."

Marayna's jaw clenched at that, "He did mention something like that to me."

"Oh?" he looked at her, "He mentioned that his wife and daughter were practicing magic? And when my father had to execute them for breaking the law they were well aware they were breaking, Lucan swore revenge?"

She let out a disbelieving laugh at that, "Arthur…I can understand your acceptance over Lucan's wife having been executed, but…do you have any idea at all how old his daughter was?"

Arthur blinked and shrugged, "15?" it was the age his father had remarked when they'd first seen Lucan arrive with the rest of the knights. He'd seen his father's expression, heard his cries of disbelief the man would dare show his face there again. He'd explained that Lucan's wife and daughter had practiced magic and had, of course, been executed for it as was the law of Camelot.

Given it was so long ago, he'd assumed that it had been nearly the end of the Great Purge or in the middle of it and he knew, as his father and tutors had often told him, all those executed during the Purge were, in fact, the greatest enemies of Camelot, which could only mean they had well and truly been practicing darker magics and using their magic for evil.

"No," she shook her head, "That's how long it's been since they were executed," she looked at him, her expression falling to such a sorrowful one that Arthur was almost starting to get worried for the answer, "Arthur…she was three years old."

"What?!" he scoffed, "No, my father would never…"

"You know he has," she cut in, "You've learned about the Purge, you know he had men, women, and children executed during it."

"She must have been…" Arthur tried to say, tried to think of some reason to justify the execution of one so young.

"What?" Marayna shook her head, "What could a three year old possibly do that is so evil that they deserved to be burned on the pyre?"

"Burned?" he whispered, completely shocked by that, the pyre…it was only ever used to serve as an example. Like with Gwen, it would have been to prove that magic was so sneaky it could get to the servants of those close to the king…and would be dealt with. But a child? A little girl? What example could she have possibly set? Surely there had to have been other children involved that had been executed in a quicker way…why burn a three year old girl?

"She had the misfortune of being the daughter of one of Uther's closest…friends."

Arthur closed his eyes, working out now exactly what the example had been, no one was safe, no one would be excused, no one would be forgiven, no matter their relation to the king. Everyone was equal in the eyes of the law.

"You're lucky though," Marayna continued, "That Lucan is as honorable as he is," Arthur looked at her, "You've seen others attacking, grieving parents who had lost their children to executions. Lucan is one, but instead of letting his hate for your father poison him…he let his love for his daughter's memory better him," she shook her head and looked out where Lucan was disappearing into the distance.

Camelot would NOT be so luck as that with others.

A/N: ...I just realized that Matthew in the last chapter...is Anderson from Sherlock lol :)

But again, I want to apologize. I have NO idea what's going on with FF, but it wouldn't let me log on again :( I even had it where I had my manage stories page open and got it right to where I just add a chapter and, when I went to add a chapter in the morning...it said I had to log on, and then when I go to log on, it says error :'( I really hope they sort this out because it's gotten a little ridiculous and I've emailed them about it each time it happens -sigh- :(

But I hope you liked the chapter :) Not much in way of fluff, but I really sort of wanted to just have a normal chapter where we sort of get to see the perspective of someone who had lost someone to Uther but maintained enough sense and perspective to not go completely insane and attack Camelot :) Plenty of fluff in the next chapter though ;)

Some notes on reviews...

Lol, I've actually got a list of AUs that I'm planning to write for all 3 TLs on my 'Upcoming Stories' page of my tumblr, that's one of them, if 11 still remembered Angel when he regenerated, so it would be a rewrite of Series 5&6 (maybe more, depending on what might change). So it's definitely going to be a future story, an AU of the HOTS where he doens't forget Angel ;) But it may not be up for quite a while :( But it WILL be written ;)