Prompt:- "When do you think Santana told Brittany about how many people she had slept with? Would she have expected that number?"
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As soon as the words are out of her mouth Santana winces in anticipation of Brittany's reaction.
She doesn't even know why she told her. It's not like her girlfriend even asked really. They've only been dating two weeks and it's not like Santana planned on dropping that bomb quite so early, (or ever), but when Brittany had casually asked her about past relationships Santana had just blurted it out.
Because she'd never had past relationships. She'd had girls. Thirteen of them to be exact. And one boy. Which she'd rather forget. Which is what she'd just blurted out.
She doesn't miss the way Brittany's eyes widen, clearly surprised by the number, and Santana worries again that this will be it. This will be the thing that Brittany discovers about her that makes her realise. Makes her realise that Santana isn't the kind of person she wants to be with. Santana feels like she's been waiting for it since they first met, the time when Brittany will decide that she's made a mistake, that Santana's not really worth it.
"Oh," the blonde exhales, "Oh okay."
Santana watches the way Brittany seems to deflate and feels shame overwhelm her.
"It's not like I'm proud of it," she mumbles, eyes darting down to her fidgeting hands in her lap. She's not proud of it at all. Some of those girls she doesn't even remember their name. Then there are the ones she messed around with but didn't have sex with.
Brittany's hand creeps into her vision and covers both of Santana's comfortingly.
"Hey, I'm sorry," she whispers, her voice encouraging Santana to look up at her again. "I didn't mean to react like that, to make you feel bad about it."
"You didn't. I already felt bad about it. I know sleeping around with girls I barely know isn't something to be proud of."
"It's not that. I just," Brittany's eyes dart away nervously before flicking back to Santana's. "It's just that I've only slept with one girl before and I know we're not ready have to sex yet but when we do I want it to be special for you and you've had a lot of experience and I haven't and what if I'm no good."
Santana's eyebrows raise as she listens to Brittany ramble on and she realises that Brittany isn't judging her. She should have known better. Just like Santana, Brittany is worried that she won't be enough, which is just ridiculous in the brunette's opinion.
She lifts her hands to cup both of her girlfriend's cheeks.
"Britt," she whispers with all the affection in the world, waiting until blue eyes meet her own. "I might have slept with those girls but I've never done this before."
Santana watches Brittany's eyes soften and she knows that her girlfriend understands the significance of her words. That Santana might have given her body to girls before but she has never given her heart, never given her trust.
The corners of Brittany's lips start to curl and Santana feels that flutter in her stomach that is just for Brittany.
"I've never done this either," the blonde whispers.
"Yeah?" Santana asks hopefully. She knows that Brittany's had a girlfriend before.
But the way Brittany is staring at her now leaves little doubt about the sincerity of her words.
"Yeah," the blonde answers before pushing up against her and crashing their lips together.
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