Chapter Six:

Bittersweet Control

7/24

Minako's POV

My eyes shoot open with a snap. In an instant all of the disorientation and sleepiness from my slumber dissipate. Before I even have the chance to consider the reason for my abrupt awakening I'm darting from my bedroom, taking stairs two at a time to get to the nearest bathroom. Just as I cross the threshold the dam breaks and I'm emptying my stomach of the little in it from yesterday.

After a few minutes the heaving finally calms down so I take a moment to clean up the bathroom. Once I'm finished I sit on the toilet and attempt to collect my thoughts. It's been a day since we've been back at the dorm and this stupid cold, or whatever, has yet to go away.

Mitsuru's doctor told her I'm alright and that this would all clear up once we got back and it hasn't. I probably have to give it more time but it seems at this point that the symptoms are getting more violent as the days pass.

Because of all of the drama with Yukari, the craziness with Aigis and whatever Operation Babe Hunt was I oddly feel as if that "vacation" left me with more stress than relaxation. Bringing my knees to my chest I take solace in my closed off state, even if it will only last a few more minutes.

I moved here to get away from all of my demons; I wanted a fresh start without all of the insanity of my past life. Then of course I'm thrown into another hell of it's own accord. The Dark Hour, the Shadows, Personas, the Velvet Room not to mention what happened on the last full moon. Not that I'm complaining. It feels nice to be needed, but I never asked for any of it.

Absently I reach for my wrist, running my fingers over the ghosts of the scars that once lingered there. I'm not that girl anymore. Even if this is a hell, at least it's a hell with some decent company.

Speaking of company... Loud, jarring knocks reverberate through the bathroom, making it impossible to think anymore.

"Minako?" Yukari demands through the door. "Are you alright?"

Unfurling myself, I stand up and try to straighten myself out. Not much I can do about the bed-head or the pajamas, but I don't look deathly sick or anything. "I'm okay," I call as I pull open the door. Once she sees me Yukari's face drops a little. "Is something wrong?"

She shakes her head, though I think it's more her clearing her thoughts than an actual negative response. "Aigis was going on a rampage. She woke everyone up saying that you were regurgitating, or something." Oh yeah, Aigis... I remember seeing her in my room when I woke up earlier. I understand that she's a slightly damaged robot but that doesn't mean it's okay for her to watch me sleep or hover around me all the time.

"Sorry about that," I say anyway grinning sheepishly. "I need to set some boundaries with her."

Yukari laughs awkwardly. "That's for sure."

"Oh, do you know what time it is?" I ask hurriedly. I almost forgot - today is a school day. Yukari's eyes widen in response, she's in her pajamas as well. We both say a quick goodbye before rushing back to our bedrooms.

-Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ-

Akihiko's POV

This seriously can't be happening again.

I crack my knuckles furiously and try my hardest to calm myself. This shouldn't be happening to me. I shouldn't be feeling this way. Of course what happened to us was somewhat traumatic but what are with these... residual feelings? I know it's sick to say with all that has happened but Minako, from the moment I met her, has reminded me of Miki.

Not in the looks department of course, Miki had the same features as me... it's just when she smiles it reaches her eyes... like how Miki's did. I've never met a girl so perfect. Minako is everything that a person, not just a girl, should be. She's better than I could ever be that's for sure. If it were her she could've saved Miki and been a better friend to Shinji when he needed it...

Just don't look at Minako talking to that guy... I chant to myself, trying to force myself away from the scene. There's no reason I should care after all.

I'm about to reach my limit when something suddenly obstructs my view. Something with a hat and an annoyingly manicured goatee. "Hello... Junpei," I manage through gritted teeth.

"Still pining, I see," he teases with a wide grin sprawled across his face. Junpei really makes me miss Shinji sometimes...

"For the last time, I don't have feelings for her," I hiss back. Ever since that day at the beach I haven't gone 24 hours without Junpei bringing it up. I can't blame him with how much I've been looking at her though. Why is that exactly, I wonder? Why can't I just let her be? Maybe it's because of how sick she's been. I mean she is our leader and a valuable asset to fending off Shadows. That's what I really should be focusing on.

Junpei just shrugs in response though, which for some reason makes my blood boil.

I cock an eyebrow at him. "You think I'm lying?" I challenge. Junpei's eyes widen, though he holds his ground.

"I mean, you're obviously lying to me. Just curious if you're lying to yourself."

I narrow my eyes at him. "I'm not lying to anyone."

Looking reproachful this time, Junpei shrugs again. "Sheesh, if you really don't have feelings for her why don't you just go after one of the hundreds of girls that's constantly chasing after you?"

Hundreds of girls?... "I don't know what you're talking about," I brush him off, and pull myself away from looking at Minako.

Behind me, Junpei begins to laugh. "You really don't notice?"

I pause for a moment, though I still don't turn back to him. "Notice what? There's nothing to notice." Again, I start to walk away but he's hot on my heels.

"I may not be all that popular, but you're notorious for having the heart of every girl at school." Every girl's heart except the one I want... I push the thought, unbidden, back down. Pretending I didn't think it at all.

"If I'm as popular as you say, could I really get a girl to go out with me that easily?" I question, not sure how much he's been exaggerating. After Operation Babe Hunt, I'm not too eager to get turned down again so soon. Plus if I went out with another girl, even for a few minutes, that would get Junpei off my back... maybe even get my mind off Minako.

"All you have to do is look around, champ," and with that he sauntered away, leaving me with nothing but my thoughts and a perpetual headache.

-Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ-

Minako's POV

Stretching my muscles after the long day of classes and the morning of retching, I make my way to the front gate of the school. Somehow I managed to score half way decent on the exams we took before the trip. Not in the top ten like usual, but I managed to at lest get in the top thirty. Normally I would be embarrassed of such a grade, although considering what was going on that week it's understandable that I wouldn't be at my best.

I wonder what Akihiko got on the test... Does what happened still bother him like it does me?

I mean sure, we agreed to be friends and do what is best for everyone, but there is something there with him that I can't quite explain. It is almost as if something had been sparked between us that night. Nothing romantic of course... but being around him is like being around a lit match except I'm the only one that can feel the flame.

Does he feel it too though? Maybe I'm just crazy... maybe he's been able to bounce back...? Rather than just an immediate distraction, was a long term effect what the Shadows were going for when they forced us together? When I think about it, ever since that night I have ignored almost every social link possible, felt no inclination to even lift my weapon, and all but turned into a sickly invalid that throws up every morning.

I stop in my tracks.

Why do I feel as if I just noticed something important? I attempt to sift through the thoughts in my head, but turn up empty. Feeling as if I'm forgetting something important, I try to clear the heaviness that seems to be pressing down on me from above. I guess this is what it feels like to have a cloud looming over your head.

Unable to shake the uneasiness, I finally make it to the large gate. Like usual for this time of day, when school has just let out, there are people everywhere. Walking, talking, standing, running, but among all this I am able to spot a familiar face. A face that no matter how hard I try I can't get out of my head.

Akihiko is talking to a girl by himself, his face beat red with what can only be nervousness. Despite the sinking feeling in my stomach I inch closer so I can hear what they are talking about. It seems other girls have the same idea as I'm able to blend in behind a crowd quite easily. The girls around me are all growling to each other in hushed voices. Rather than angry like these girls though all I feel is sick to my stomach.

"S-so what did you need from me, Senpai?" the girl he's standing with asks as she tries to hide her shyness. She's actually really pretty though, looking innocent yet athletic at the same time. What I would imagine to be Akihiko's type...

The words that come from his mouth next though, make me cold for some reason.

"I was wondering if you would like to go out with me some time," Akihiko barely gets out, his face getting even more red than before. All I need to see is the girl's smile in response before I stomp away.

Why do I feel angry? My chest burns and my palms turn to ice. I should be happy for Akihiko. Obviously what happened between us didn't set his love life or anything in his life for that matter back an inch. Everything on the roof, the pain that showed on his face... was that just guilt? Did it all just not effect him in any way?

Before I know it, hot tears are stinging my cheeks. If Akihiko can move on so easily then so can I.

I furiously wipe away the tears, feeling a moment of clarity, when an idea hits me like a truck. I realize what I overlooked earlier. It takes all of my control not to die from a heart attack right there. Then everything starts to go dark.

-Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ-