Chapter Fifteen

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After reluctantly agreeing to join the KKK, (which actually stood for Kingdom Of Kupa Keep and wasn't just some cruel play on words made by Cartman), I was being patrolled to some location. Well, I was being lead I should say, because of course... Knowing the kingdom's location was tippy-top secret and I wasn't allowed to know it just yet. This meant that I had to be blindfolded and be led somewhere, where I had no real clue where I was going. They literally could've lead me to the edge of a cliff and I wouldn't of been any the wiser. (Is that how the saying goes? I'm not sure. I'm only 10, how am I meant to know?). But anyways, it was for this exact reason that I was clutching on to someone's arm tightly, as a subtle warning that if I were to be pushed off a cliff, they would surely be joining me. I swear if this is some sort of a trick I will not be very happy. I knew it wasn't Tweek that I was holding on to, as he was busily stuttering away on the other side of me. I think he was trying to whisper to me about what game we were playing, and how to actually play the game. I couldn't really take in his information however as I had put all my brain power into trying to walk without the sense of sight. As if to show how useless this was, I managed to stumble on my next step. This, in turn, caused me to grip tighter on to whoever's arm I was holding. I wouldn't of been surprised if I was practically squeezing the person to death.

"Ow. Ease up dipshit". I wasn't entirely sure who had said that, but it sounded more like Kyle than anyone else so I guessed that was who I clinging onto as if it were a matter of life or death.

"Sorry", I apologised before feeling irritated at the fact he had called me dipshit. "...and I wouldn't of hurt you if I could just walk to wherever the fuck it is we're going without this shitty blindfold on". My sassy remark earned a snicker from both Craig and Kenny. I could tell their voices from a mile away.

"That's right firecrotch. Take your anger out on the Jew. It's the only thing he's good for", Cartman muttered contently, as he fought to catch his breath. He was still limping away as Jimmy had asked him about it. All Cartman said back was that he wanted to be more like Jimmy, by pretending to 'be to stupid to not know how to walk'. I almost lashed out at Cartman when he said that. But the fact that I was blindfolded and that someone had quickly grabbed onto the back of my jumper to stop me from pouncing meant that I had to retain my anger. Fortunately for me, someone had hit Cartman for his nasty comment. I wasn't sure who had hit him exactly, as Cartman didn't make it clear. All he said was 'Fuck you, you black asshole'... But if you knew Cartman, then you'd know he calls everyone black assholes. I'm pretty sure Cartman just lived to be controversial in all the worst ways. I hope it was Craig that had hit him. I hope Craig made him cry again.

"Fuck you fatass". Cartman chuckled at Kyle's reaction to his insult, while clearly choosing to ignore the 'fatass' insult Kyle had threw his way. I knew this, as Cartman didn't reply to Kyle.

"What are you doing with Nay?". I stopped walking at the sound of this feminine voice. It was Red's voice. I could tell, by her high-pitch that I had grown accustomed too.

"Ignore her lads. She's a dirty no-good succubus", Cartman remarked with a sour note to his voice.

"Hey!", I shouted in defiance, but my voice was muffled under the 'gasps'. 'wows' and 'remember when Chef dated a succubus' from the rest of the lads I was walking with. Before the gasps had fully died down I was pretty sure I heard Wendy's voice say something insulting about Cartman's weight.

"Come on Red. There's no point talking to these immature boys". Yes. That was definitely Wendy, as only her could say something in such a condescending tone. I hurriedly let go of Kyle's arm and turned and grabbed onto another person.

"What did you want Red?".

A muffled reply told me that I had accidently grabbed onto Kenny and not Red. Mumbling an embarrassed apology I made to remove the blindfold from my eyes, but my hands were roughly pulled down by someone.

"Don't let her succubus mind tricks warp your fragile little mind", Cartman whispered. It was he who had pulled my hands down. I thrust my hands from his grip before reaching out for where I thought Kyle was still stood. Once I had grabbed on to a sleeve of some kind, I let myself be lead to wherever this Kingdom was. That's if we were going to a kingdom. I hoped we were going to a kingdom.

-/-\-/-\-/-\-/-\-/-\-/-\-/-\-/-\-/-\-/-\-

"Here we are firecrotch", Cartman proclaimed proudly as he hurriedly untied my blindfold.

"I told you to stop cal- Woah!". I paused dumbstruck. We were obviously in someone's garden... But that obviously wasn't why I was marvelling. I was marvelling at the gigantic fort that I could only guess my friends had made themselves. How had they managed to build all this? It was amazing. It was remarking. "Wow".

"It's good isn't it?", Stan asked with a smile on his lips. I turned to look at him before nodding with an amazed smile. He laughed at my amazement with a strange look in his eyes. As he made to ask me something, I was twisted haphazardly on the spot so that I became face to face with Clyde. Clyde? I'm pretty sure he hadn't been at the coffee shop with everyone... So he must've been here all this time. Maybe we were in Clyde's garden right now?

"What weapon do you want?", Clyde asked in a fairly bored manner. Even though he hadn't really said that in a positive tone, it was one of the nicest tones Clyde has ever used when talking to me.

"God damn Clyde! Stay in fucking character you retard!", Cartman whined from a chair that he made Butters retrieve from a purple tent-like fort at the very back of the garden. Cartman was clearly living it up as 'king'. To show his hatred towards the 'monarch' Clyde cut his eyes at Cartman but did as he was told. This made me snicker, which put a proud smile on Clyde's face. Once my snickering stopped, he began his role-playing.

"Hello weary traveler, can I interest you in any of my wares?". I gave him a guilty confused look, as I truly had no clue what he had just asked me. Fortunately he nodded both in understanding, and in a way that made sure that Cartman couldn't see him breaking character. Speaking about Cartman, Clyde inspected the fat-wizard and noted that Cartman was now busily arguing with Kyle over who which of them was the better king. Clyde happily broke character, with a hushed whisper.

"I'll break character but I've got to stay quiet. After what happened last time we played this, it's a wonder the guys are letting me play at all. Cartman's desperately looking for a reason to ban me from the game again, so I'm trying my hardest not to get on his bad side". This time I nodded in understanding, even though I had no clue what actually had happened last time. With another whisper, Clyde pointed towards a small plastic blade on the table. "That one is worth three dollars, but I'll knock it down to just one dollar if you want". Why Clyde was being nice to me all of a sudden was beyond me. Maybe he just wanted a friend playing this game that didn't judge him based on whatever had happened last year. Smiling appreciatively I nodded and fished for some change in my pocket. I was still getting used to the American currency but I managed to give Clyde the right amount of money. He poured the assorted coins I had gave him into a small can that was sat on the table, before procuring my new weapon and handing it to me. As I took it from him, he grabbed onto my sleeve to stop me from leaving the table. "One last thing Nathan". I looked at Clyde and awaited for him to continue. "Don't trust Kenny". I wanted him to continue or atleast explain, but he had walked off to the other side of the table so that he could restock the weapon I had just bought. Looking at the plastic sword in my hand, I noticed it was cheap and flimsy, but it was very obvious that with the right amount of force this weapon would inflict quite an extreme whiplash.

"Firecrotch", Cartman began from behind me. Almost instantly I whipped around unintentionally hitting him in the arm with my new weapon. He whined in pain as he clutched on to the reddened skin on his arm. "What the fuck! Fucking French piece of crap!". His pain induced a chuckle from Kyle and Stan who were now both squeezed comfortably in the chair Cartman had just gotten up from.

"Sorry Eric", I apologised unapologetically. I didn't really feel that sorry though. In fact I was slightly happy at the fact that I had caused him pain.

"You better be", He spat back as he continued to rub his arm. Once he was satisfied he had done enough rubbing he looked at me with a devious grin on his face. "Okay fir- Nathan...". The fact he had called me by my actual name made me smile. He probably thought I would hit him again if he called me firecrotch again. I didn't actually mean to hit him in the first place, but it would probably be more beneficial to me if he didn't know that. "...Normally I'd get you to pick one of four classes. But you already have a class". He smirked smugly when he said this.

"I do?".

"Yeah".

"W- What then?". Cartman walked towards a tree stump and sat on it so that he wouldn't have to stand.

"Well the Ginger class. Hah!". I looked at him curiously, while he continued to look smug at his lame excuse of an insult. Not really caring that I lost my chance to pick a class as I had already been deemed as a member of the 'Ginger' class, I smiled. Instantly noticing that I wasn't offended in the slightest Eric's face fell a little as he stood up from his stump. "You know what... I don't think this is going to work".

"Huh?", I asked confusedly.

"Yeah. I don't think this game is really for you".

"C-Cartman what -ACK- are you s-saying?", Tweek asked with a shocked expression.

"Shut up spazfuck", Cartman practically shouted. Almost instantly the look of hurt was in Tweek's eyes. Jimmy, Clyde and Token went silent while looking at Cartman cautiously. However, once he had given them all a quick glare, each person stopped staring at him. Once he was satisfied he had unnerved his friend he turned his eyes back to me.

"Just get out of my garden buttfucker", he spat as he pointed towards his house. He was baring his teeth as if to try to make him look as threatening as possible, but instead it just made him look like a dumbass. I raised my newly bought weapon in the air, fully planning on hitting him with it... But I decided not to when he clenched his eyes shut, fully expecting me to continue on with my previous plan. Lowering my arm, so as not to hit any one, I mouthed goodbye to everyone else who was in the garden. I received a few awkward waves goodbye, while the others ignored me completely, deciding to busy themselves by staring intently to the ground or to their shoes. Making my way across the garden to the house, I noticed Tweek's face which now looked a lot more disappointed than hurt. He rushed to catch up with me, and I gave him a reassuring smile to show him that I didn't mind not being allowed to play. His frown remained on his face however.

"What's up Tweek?".

"I-I w-wanted you to -ACK- play with us", he sighed sadly. My smile expanded further across my face when I realised he actually wanted me to play the game. Maybe I had finally found my best friend here. Well, I already saw Tweek as my best friend. I just didn't know whether he saw me as his best friend...

To say this was a fucked up town... with fetus-faced school nurses, random meterosexual fads and alien-beasts killing people in the forest... This town had done me some good. I finally had a best friend, and I had whatever I had with Red. I wasn't sure what to call whatever it was I had with Red, but I liked whatever it was never-the-less. Yeah... South Park may have been a fucked up little town... But it was my fucked up little town.

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Chapter Fifteen; This is quite a small chapter, but revision and the lack of time to write anything has taken it's toll on me. Also, I'm beginning to find this story a little stale to write. I really want to finish it, but the process of writing it is becoming a little tedious and lack-lustered for me. Maybe it's just revision draining my energy. On the plus side, this monday is May Day. I don't know if England is the only country that has May Day, but it basically means I don't have to go to college on that day. Hopefully that means I can spread two days of revision over three days... That will enable me to atleast write another chapter or atleast half a chapter this weekend.

Thanks to Cortez30 for the review. The whole 'Sunshine, Sparkles' thing I'm planning to use, when I finally write up the girls POV one-shot lol. I couldn't possibly forget to use that. I hope that sunshine and sparkles with you ahaha.

Also thanks to IHateMarySue'sSoooooMuch. I'm glad you like the dad and the whole firecrotch nickname ahah! & I agree. Stick Of Truth was literally one of the best games I've ever played. I'm seriously hoping they make some mission DLC for it!

Disclaimer; South Park... NO MINE. VERY NO MINE.