Imagine

Without General Cross, Allen would not be who he is today. Not that he was convinced that was a good thing. But in the face of this new development, it was his only lifeline, so he repeated it to himself, hoping to drown out Komui.

Without Cross, I would not be the man I am today. Without Cross...

Lavi was next to him, twirling his hammer like a schoolgirl twirls a pencil. Sure, his hammer was the size of a pencil, but Allen would never treat his god-given Innocence like that - mostly because it was in his arm, and his arm had to be detached in order to be rotated around his fingertip. And maybe not even then.

It could be worse. He could be going on this futile Cross retrieval / Cross protective detail mission with Ponytail, but thankfully, the wannabe samurai had his own father figure to find. Besides, Allen did owe Cross for all the various life lessons, without which he would - oh. Right. Without which he would not be the man he is today.

"This mission could decide the fate of our world. If you should encounter the Heart of Innocence..."

Scrape.

Finally, Komui was standing, and after needlessly straightening out what Allen was pretty certain was a sheaf of random papers from the piles on his desk, the Head of the European Branch handed it to Allen and Lavi, and wished them a good trip.

Allen hadn't heard most of the briefing, but he was pretty sure he could fill in the rest. The gist of it was: find Cross. Find the Innocence. Don't die. Plus something about the universe and a war for the world, but honestly, he could just rewind Timcanpy and listen to it if he really needed to know. Not to mention, Lavi seemed to have tried some of Lenalee's coffee or something, because he jumped up as soon as Komui was done, dragging Allen out and cheerfully waving before shutting the door.

Wasn't history a dark subject? How did Lavi stay so upbeat every day? Did he just wake up everyday on the right side of the bed? Wouldn't the right side of the bed be the left side, so that Lavi could actually see? Even now, half singing to himself, there was an added bounce in his step. It meant that keeping up with Lavi required a slight trot from him, which was not at all because he had shorter legs. It was okay though, because he'd been a bit lax in pretending to be interested in what Komui was saying, ever since it became lunchtime. He could feel his stomach gnawing at itself. It was going to eat itself and then him if he didn't get to the cafeteria soon.

Still, his politeness meter was dropping. Maybe it was time to leave the Order for a while anyway, and recharge so that he could come back to acting like the perfect apprentice turned exorcist. And unofficially adopted son of an alcoholic, tax-and-debt evading womanizer.

Du du du dudu-du du.

Allen ignored Lavi's pseudo-dancing in favor of finding the quickest way to feed his parasite - er, parasitic Innocence.

"Lenalee!" He waved at a pair of green pigtails that were close to the front of line to Jerry's window. Not that there were many pairs of long, flowing, green pigtails in the Black Order. His gamble paid off when she turned, and he ignored grumbles as he blithely sauntered to her side, bypassing the majority of the existing line. Kanda was also there, looking disgruntled at being reduced to doing something as courteous as waiting his turn behind some Finders.

"I was hoping I'd see you here," he said, with Lavi in tow. It really was a blessing. Disaster relief in the form of sustenance. "We have a new mission, and I guess Lavi's pretty psyched."

Lenalee looked like the picture of feminine concern. Sometimes Allen wasn't entirely certain she didn't take on all the female roles after all the other female exorcists had died off. Except Miranda, but everyone was a bit worried that she would sleep deprive herself into a coffin. And Klaud Nine, but she had a giant monkey, damn it. A Simian. Were the Guardians girls? Or ghosts? God, he was going to wind up gay with such strange female options. He really needed to get out more.

"You'll be careful, won't you, Lavi?" She turned her large, caring eyes towards the redhead, who was stand-dancing in line to the beat of his own drum. "I've heard the number of Akuma out there has increased lately."

"Yeah, don't worry, Lenalee." He was brandishing his weapon for emphasis. With the air of someone imparting a secret, he elaborated, "Do you know why? Because they'll have to stop - for hammer time."

They all heard it, sneaking into their brains like a worm through the ear: Du du du dudu-du du.

"Che."

"They," he continued. "Can't touch this." No shame from the one-eyed exorcist. The hammer found itself resting against the ground and danced with like a cane.

"Wanna bet?" Kanda growled.

Allen took advantage of their distraction and Lenalee's large, developing, sweat drop to sidle past them to place his order.

"Yuuuu~" Lavi drawled, "Can't touch this."

Allen turned just in time to catch the surly exorcist taking the hammer-wielding idiot down, and proving that song all sorts of wrong. Really, it was like baiting badgers. Briefly, as they smashed into his newly completed order and some cards mysteriously rained down on the brawl, the white haired exorcist wondered if he would ever meet that smooth-talking Portuguese man again. This was followed by a long period of time spent giving Jerry a revised order, with additional items to compensate for the added hunger from having to wait yet again.

When the broken plates and wasted food were cleaned up and Allen's stomach had finally been satisfied, Lavi found himself in the Black Order's sick bay coughing up mild amounts of blood, completely incapacitated in terms of embarking on the mission they had just received.

Which is how Allen ended up leaving with Lenalee.