III.

So she needed a paternity test.

She'd done a bit of research already. It was relatively easy to purchase one online, but she hadn't figured out yet how to retrieve the package without her dad knowing. She couldn't let it be delivered at their address, because either him or Lianne would find out. Maybe she could have it send to the post office, but that wouldn't be totally safe either because they'd probably notify Keith Mars.

She was lying in bed but apparently sleeping wasn't on the program tonight. Sometimes she wished her mind worked a bit slower, or was at least less active during night hours. She needed a distraction, but of course Duncan's face floated up again and she had trouble pushing that image of him away.

She hated being hung up on him, after everything. She knew he was still thinking about her too. Even though it was just so wrong. She muffled a scream in her pillow. We sure are some messed up kids. Duncan with his sullen silences and deadpan looks, Lilly doing everything to piss off her mom, Logan with his constant drinking and partying… and that left her. Virginal Veronica Mars, who was now sporting a short haircut and combat boots.

Lilly had simply crooked an eyebrow at her new looks. 'Veronica Mars! Have you been watching Freaks and geeks again?'

She'd just shrugged it off. She couldn't quite put her finger on Lilly's reaction, but after a couple of minutes she realized Lilly was simply amused. 'Well, I've got to say, you've got guts. I'm actually impressed.'

That was the first genuine smile they'd shared in weeks. 'It wasn't exactly the look I'd go for…'

'Thanks for your input, Lil, but this is my thing.'

'Well, who knows. Maybe grunge will become the trend again. In that case, you're all settled.'

Lilly had slung her arm around her shoulder and they'd walked up to school together. When they heard Madison actually gasp in disgust, Lilly had just thrown her head back and laughed. She never said it out loud, but Veronica knew what that meant. You're still my best friend, Veronica. No matter what everyone else thinks. She actually felt better than she'd felt in a long time.

Duncan had been dumbfounded when he saw her... but she wasn't going to think about him.

Logan had just smirked, but she could see a glimmer of admiration in his eyes. They hadn't really talked much after he and Lilly had broken up for good. Two weeks after her miserable breakup with Duncan, she'd made the mistake of trying to talk to Logan. Just from the look at his face she'd known he wasn't in a good mood, but she'd went through with it anyway.

'Well, well, if it isn't Veronica Mars.' He leaned back a bit, as if he was going to enjoy the show. She'd seen this Logan before, she sensed the anger behind his relaxed façade, but she'd never thought he would turn his anger on her like that.

'I just want to talk.'

'What did you do to him? You must have broken his poor fragile heart pretty good, given the state he's in. Can we really still call you Saint Veronica, or should I think of a new nickname?'

She'd closed her eyes and drew a sharp breath. 'Okay, I don't get it either. I didn't do anything. He just… decided to ignore me. I swear I have no idea why. Please Logan, has he said anything to you about it?'

'Hmm, let me think… Nope. Haven't you talked to your lovely girlfriend yet? She loves to dish the dirt, after all.' His behavior made sense now.

'Are you two broken up again?'

'Is it any of your business, Veronica Mars? Oh wait, it probably is. She broke up with me over some girl named Yolanda. Does that ring any bells?'

'Logan, I'm sorry, but you couldn't really expect me…'

'Oh, of course you had to tell her. You're such an angel. Lilly should be happy to have you as her little lapdog. Funny it doesn't work both ways, doesn't it Mars?'

She felt empty all of the sudden. 'Logan, what –'

'Because while I was still pining after Lilly, she was screwing the local biker club! Oh, don't pretend you didn't know, Ronnie. She was probably sharing all her dirty little secrets with you, while you were just giggling along. Or is there something Duncan should know too?'

She opened her mouth but found herself at a loss for words. Well, who thought she could really outwit Logan Echolls? If she could at least come up with something…

'I actually thought you were my friend too. My mistake, I guess.'

'You're…'

'Are you actually going to finish that? Because I would love to hear what you're thinking of me right now.'

She just wanted to slap the smug smile of his face. He's just trying to hurt you like Lilly's hurt him. He isn't even worth it. Then why did she feel a pang of guilt?

'You're a jerk, Logan.'

She'd turned around and ran away so he couldn't see her cry.

Even after he and Lilly made up (although they'd only managed to stay together for a week or two), they'd avoided each other. He never apologized and she'd never asked for a favor again, and things had definitely cooled between the two of them. She felt a bit sorry because she did care about him, but he knew Lilly would always come in first place like Duncan came in first place for him. The Kane siblings were the glue after all that had kept them together.

And what if she was one of them?