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Chapter Three

Meanwhile back at the apartment, Sheldon was busy on his computer printing up documents. Amy had been trying to get his attention for the previous half an hour to no success.

When he was finished printing up whatever it was that he was working on, she let out a relieved breath.

"Sheldon, we need to speak about our visit to my mother's next month," she said, sounding shriller than she intended due to her irritation that once again he didn't seem to be paying attention to her.

He looked at her with mild annoyance, as he said to her, "Amy, I have an I.Q. of 187. If there is one thing that can be said about yours truly, it is my ability to attend to and think of multiple things at any one given moment. You were speaking of the visit to your mother's residence?"

"Yes," she said, looking more relaxed.

"I apologize, but I will be unavailable to attend," he told her, as he found the pen he was looking for and proceeded to quickly sign all the papers in front of him that he needed to sign. He handed the papers over to Amy, saying, "I am dissolving the relationship agreement. I am sorry to say that it has come to this. I find that your mind is amazing, but I do not feel anything for you beyond friendship."

She looked at the papers and back to Sheldon and then back to the papers. "But…"

"Amy, you deserve more than I can ever offer to you," he breathed. "So much more." She looked up at him, her eyes filling with tears. "I…can't. Not now, not in five years from now, not ever."

She took up the pen and signed the paperwork as quickly as possible, leaping to her feet and rushing over to the door and yanking it open. She turned and looked over to Sheldon.

"I'll give you this time to come to your senses, but you'll come to regret…" He tore the papers in half, making her gasp in pained shock.

"It's over, Amy," he said. "It's for the best for us. I can be your friend, but that's it."

"You love me!" she yelled at him.

"Yes, I do. I love your mind. Your intelligence is above par. It's…" He smiled sweetly. "It's beautiful." He tossed the torn up contract away in the garbage. "But that's all I feel for you." Sheldon pulled out a piece of paper from his messenger bag and went over to her, handing it over to her. "Here. Take this."

She took it hesitantly, looking at what was on the paper. "Dr. Hector Quinta? Who is this?"

"He's a doctoral candidate in physics that arrived to Cal Tech this last week," he said. "He saw you and he finds you very attractive."

Looking more cheerful now, she asked, "He does?"

He nodded. "Call him. You won't be sorry that you did."

Clutching the paper tightly, she studied him a moment. "If I leave, I'm not coming back."

Smiling sadly, Sheldon murmured, "Goodbye, Amy Farrah Fowler. It has been an honor knowing you."

Her face crumbled and she rushed away. He shut the door and proceeded to begin his last cleanup of the apartment, as a way to wait for Penny's arrival.

Getting to the apartment was very awkward. As they had gone to the restaurant in one car, they had gone back the same way. And then there was getting up to the fourth floor via the stairs. Leonard never wished more fervently for longer legs or to be athletic or for the elevator to be working. But when she turned and went into the apartment as well? He'd had enough.

"Stop following me!" he demanded.

"I'm not." She looked over to Sheldon who was slipping his laptop into his messenger bag. "Hey, Moon Pie. Are you ready?"

"Just about, Penny," he said, picking up a large envelope and handing it over to Leonard. "My half of the rent is paid off until the end of the lease, which will be finished by the end of next month. This is the paperwork dissolving the roommate agreement. I wish you well. Goodbye, Leonard."

They had hoped that they'd be able to escape without Leonard going into a fit, but that wasn't to be.

"Where are you going?" he demanded. "That's my…" She shot him a look. "You can't date him!"

"We're not dating," she told him. "We're friends."

Crossing his arms over his chest, he said, "Well, you can't be friends either." Penny and Sheldon just looked to each other and back over to him, saying nothing as they glared at him. Feeling uncomfortable now, he began to wish he was taller yet again. "What?"

"Didn't you grow up beyond age twelve?" she asked him. "I know I'm immature and Sheldon here has his moments of childishness, but you just top the kiddie cake!" Leonard's face went beet red. "We broke up and I'm sorry it hurts you, but Sheldon and I are friends and that isn't going to change anytime soon just because you demand it."

Leonard scowled at them, looking more and more like that kid she accused him of behaving like. "Well, we'll see how long it lasts. I give you two a week before…Hey! Where are you going?"

They stopped walking down the stairs and looked over to him. The two looked to each other and back over to him. Together they said, "Home."

Frowning now in confusion, he said, "But you live here."

Penny looked over to Sheldon, saying, "You know up until now I thought those I.Q. points between you and Leonard weren't that big of a deal, but I guess they are, huh?"

"More than you can even imagine," he muttered. "Let's go home, Penny. My sister is leaving in two days and I want some more playtime with my nephew before they go."

"You just want to be able to read him his night time story," she teased him. "You know what your sister is going to say, don't you?"

Sheldon rolled his eyes. "I don't care what she says. Isaac Asimov is perfectly fine as children's night time reading material…"

Penny waved goodbye to a still shocked Leonard, as they walked away talking to each other. Wondering what the hell was going on, he rushed over to 4A, grabbed his keys and went over to Penny's apartment sure that this was some sort of joke the two were playing on him.

"What the frak!" Leonard exclaimed at the sight of the utterly bare space.

When Leonard arrived at the house address that Bernadette gave him, he didn't know what to expect. But a full blown pirate party where his own mother was dressed up as a pirate wench, wasn't it. Not even close.

He had gone over with the plan of talking Penny back into their relationship. He loved her and she loved him—and dammit! He'd seen her first! He'd called dibs! That should count for something, right? The quiet residential street had little by way of parking and thus making it that he had to park at least four blocks away from the house in question.

So forced to walk over, he wasn't in all that great of a mood by the time he came within spitting distance of the house. He looked at the address and was shocked to see that where he was going was having a party! He approached the house cautiously and went into the backyard where all the guests were coming and going. And everyone, every single person there, was dressed like a pirate.

Looking around in shock he took note of everyone that was there. Zack, Penny's one time boyfriend was at the grill in the corner of the yard, in charge of the cooking from the looks of him. Bernadette and Howard were dressed up as a pirate and her lusty tavern wench respectively (Howard had lost a bet with Sheldon). They were dancing to an off key tavern song of all things. This was made all the stranger by her continually slapping her husband's ass playfully and Howard just as jauntily hitting her rump with his fan.

Yeah, he didn't need to see that.

TBC...

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