WARNING: Dark Kaoru
A paper doll. Slowly unfolding, the same thing over and over. Perfectly symmetrical, they are just like one. The scissors used to cut the doll from the paper rests in my hand. I try to reason with myself, the creator. The only way to make them different is to mar the beauty of one.
I gripped my scissors harder and picked the paper doll up. They were perfect, like twins should be. But I am less than perfect. Because truth be told, I haven't been a mirror image of my brother since our second year of middle school. My wrists were covered in scars, marring the beauty of one.
I opened and closed the scissors over and over again, the dolls resting on my desk staring at me. The one on the left looked at me while the other stared but didnt see. He was already different, I had made sure of that. I had taken the same scissors I had used to cut them from the paper to make small slits on ones arms, so that he never had to know the pain of being in the shadow of the other, his twin. I had marred his beauty, but I had made him different. All my life all I wanted was for someone to see me, not the other twin. The doll who was just a mirror image the original. I wanted him to be different.
Haruhi Fujioka saw through me. She knew we were different; she knew I was different. She didn't tell us apart from our hair parts, or the small difference in or voices. She could tell I was broken, that I wasn't the same. I could tell that the day she grabbed my wrist, when she told me she knew we were different.
I looked down at the paper dolls resting on my desk. Picking one up, the marred on, me... I slipped the scissors around the neck and closed them hard, the bodies floating to the ground. I held the head between my fingers and threw it in the garbage beside my desk. I was different, different than my twin and different than the dolls. I was so weak, i was weak and cut my skin to be different, I was weak and didn't try to change myself. The doll... It had no choice, I forced this fate upon it.
The fact that this doll.. Made of paper... Is Stronger than me...
I broke the scissors in half. Rolling my sleeve up, I yanked one half across my wrist and cried, the tears stinging the newly opened scars. This was my life. I try to be strong... But really, I am the paper doll. I can't chose my fate, this is what I am forced to be.
Because while Haruhi could tell us apart, she was the only one. And that, did not change anything.
This was really just to get crap out of my head... Sorry! Not very good, just ideas thrown together... Haha...
R & R!