CHAPTER 12: My boy...my son
A/N: Without further ado...
A young, raven-haired boy was hiding behind a bush, his back against the leaves, his chest heaving with short bursts of gasps, and a grin plastered across his lips. His appearance was disheveled with dirt smeared across his plain white shirt and on the side of his trousers. Sweat was trickling down his neck before disappearing beneath his shirt.
A light trail of snow was falling down from the grey coloured skies.
He shifted a little to the left before sticking his head out when he reached the edge, gazing at the narrow passage between two, long hedges on either side, his forehead scrunched in concentration. He looked behind him before he took off.
His expression turned giddy and a beaming smile lit his face up as he was halfway cross the passage, nearing the end that opened up to a large open field.
"Yes!" he shouted triumphantly. Just two more steps and he would cross the threshold. "Take that Cedric!" he laughed, as he spread his arms wide and closed his eyes, victory only a step further.
A great whooshing sound and he was plucked up like weed from soil, enveloped in strong arms as he let out a high-pitched shriek.
"NOOO!" he wailed, as he was deposited on the front of the broom, his arms folded across his chest and his face turning red in anger.
"Hands on the handle, champ" whispered the brown-haired boy as he leaned close to his ear. He chuckled when the younger boy continued to ignore him. He wrapped his left arm across his stomach and pulled him close till his back was touching his front. "So, champ, I hope you've gotten better at heating charms because-" he shivered exaggeratedly. "Otherwise, getting pummeled by snowballs in this weather, oh man, can't even imagine" he grinned, and the boy with the lightning bolt scar on his head glowered before unwinding his arms and grabbing the older boy's forearm that was draped across his torso and bringing his teeth down on it.
"Oye! Watch it!"
He jerked his arm away from his mouth and looked at the little, half-moon shaped teeth marks etched into his skin.
"You know what, I was going to let you get away with just a couple of hits but now I've changed my mind, thanks to you"
"No!" the little guy moaned and looked over his shoulder. "Cedric, please!" he pleaded, tears forming behind his eyes. "You know how much I hate getting wet. Please" he stuck his bottom lip out.
"Turn around, you little wanker." he turned his head back around with his hand. "I'm not falling for that again" he pushed on the handle and soon the broom was descending towards the ground.
They landed in a clearing with snow covered trees behind them and a small pond just to the side.
They got off and walked towards the biggest tree in the area. Cedric laid the broom down before facing the younger boy, smirking down at him and receiving a glare in return.
"So...you ready"
The little boy clenched his fists in anger as he kept shooting daggers at him. He stuck his chin out and said "Fine, I'm not afraid" he said pompously, even though his legs were trembling.
Cedric arched an eyebrow and shrugged his shoulder. "If you say so" he took out his wand from inside his jacket and pointed it at the ground. He started swirling it in round motions and the snow next to his feet began taking shape of a ball. He stopped when the ball was the size of a quaffle.
He levitated it towards him before grabbing it.
"Now would be the time to cast those heating charms"
The younger boy harrumphed arrogantly. "I don't need heating charms. I'm a strong boy"
Cedric shook his head ruefully. "You're going to be one heck of a trouble maker in the future, you know that"
He let out a small snort of laughter when the little guy stuck his tongue out.
"Okay then, as you wish" he pulled his hand back a little and got into a throwing position.
The younger boy flinched and shut his eyes tightly, waiting for the impact.
A few seconds passed but nothing happened, his eyes remained closed though there was movement behind his eyelids as if he was desperately fighting the urge to open them.
A loud splash made him snap open his eyes and his gaze instantly went towards Cedric's hand. There was no snowball. His face morphed into confusion and he lifted his gaze towards his eyes.
Cedric motioned him to look behind him, which he did and saw ripples surfacing in the middle of the pond.
He turned his head around and frowned at the older boy. Cedric flashed him a warm smile. "Game finished"
His frown quickly turned into a full-blown grin before he sprinted towards him and in five steps tackled him to the ground.
"HA! HA!"
Their laughter rang out in the stillness of the weather as he put his arms around the older boy's neck and kicked his legs jubilantly in the air.
"Okay, okay!" Cedric grabbed him by the shoulder before gently prying him back so he could sit up. "Oh boy!" he wiped the back of his hand across his forehead as they both took deep breaths to calm their breathing.
Cedric leaned back on his hands and stretched his legs forward as the bespectacled boy sat on his knees.
"Here" Cedric pointed his wand at him and murmured a spell. "Now you'll be nice and warm in no time"
"Wow!" the younger boy whispered a few seconds later, his eyes rolling in the back of his head in pleasure. "It's so good" he groaned.
Cedric let out a small chuckle and shook his head before his expression turned serious. "It's good to be competitive, Harry" he started, as the black-haired boy opened his eyes. "But there is a difference between being competitive and being stubborn." he inclined his head and leaned a little towards him. "You were being stubborn"
Harry dropped his gaze to his hands.
"The most important thing in any situation is to be smart. You could be most skilled person in anything, quidditch, flying, dueling, or anything else for that matter and that may be enough against some but not against everyone. The same principle follows in a fight or battle, you may be the stronger of the two but eight times out of ten the person who thinks smartly rather than relying on brute strength or power will win." He took a brief pause before continuing. "Now, what would've happened if I did throw that snowball at you and you didn't cast a heating charm even though you know how to, a particularly good one at that." He waited for Harry to respond which never came. "You would've gotten cold, and for what, just because you lost. That's not acting smart. That's being stubborn. You know what's the first thing they teach you at the academy?"
Harry looked at him and shook his head.
"To lock all your emotions up because emotions make you do some really stupid shit. Just like you did"
Harry morosely nodded his head.
Cedric leaned forward and ruffled his hair before giving him a smile.
"So, what did you learn today?" he asked in mock seriousness.
Harry gave him a toothy grin before answering. "To not be stubborn."
"That's right" Cedric lifted his hand up and Harry high fived him. "See how easy that was." Harry nodded his head before the smile dropped from his face and a dejected look replaced it. "What's wrong?" Cedric frowned.
Harry shrugged his shoulder as he ducked his head down.
"Hey, no more of that." Cedric pulled him on to his lap before curling his arms around his small frame. He let out a long sigh. "Is this about me leaving, again?"
His answer came in the form of a small nod.
"Oh Harry, it's only for a month, maybe even less if we complete the mission early"
"But still, I wouldn't get to see you" sniffled Harry. "Before I leave for Hogwarts. It's only three weeks away and I would be all alone. You promised we would sit together on the train"
"I'm so sorry, mate" sighed Cedric. "I told you now with the war ramping up we could get called up at any time."
"It's so unfair" mumbled Harry, wiping his tears away.
"Hey, it's only a month, buddy, and then before you know it, we will be wreaking havoc all over Hogwarts." Cedric pinched his side, making him smile. "I'll show you all the secret spots, you'll make new friends, maybe even get a head start at wooing the birds" he nudged his shoulder, making Harry blush.
Harry shifted on the spot and turned around in his arms. "You promise"
"I promise"
"I'm going to miss you"
"I'll miss you too, buddy"
Harry fiddled with zip of Cedric's jumper. "What if no one likes me?" he said in a soft voice.
"Of course, they'll like you" Cedric made him look up by lifting his chin. "You're a Potter and no one can charm people's socks off like us Potter's"
Harry's lips curled into a smile. "Okay"
"Okay" Cedric tapped his nose playfully. "And always remember...you'll never be alone" They held each other's gazes as Cedric continued. "Even when you feel like it, you'll never be alone. We'll always be here" he placed his hand over his heart. "Everyone you love, everyone who loves you, always, they'll be here"
"Even when you go away to fight?"
Cedric smiled. "Buddy, I'm never leaving you. I know you're afraid and it's okay to admit to be afraid. It's okay to cry. I cry!"
"You do!" Harry exclaimed, shocked.
"Of course," Cedric chuckled.
"But I've never heard you"
"Well, I don't do it openly. But don't you dare use an extendable ear on my door at night!" he mock glared, making Harry giggle. "But sure, I cry."
"But you're so strong and big" Harry said innocently.
Cedric chortled. "So, you're saying just because I'm big and strong, thanks by the way. I'm now going to flex my muscles in front of the mirror when we get back, I'm not allowed to cry." He shook his head disappointedly but there was humor dancing behind his eyes.
"Wait, so I'm allowed to cry when I get big"
Cedric framed his head in his hands. "Yes, crying isn't something to be ashamed of, okay" Harry nodded his head.
"Good" He pulled him into a hug.
"I love you" Harry mumbled into his shoulder.
"I love you, too...so much."
They pulled back after a while and Cedric wiped the tears trailing down Harry's cheeks.
"C'mon, let's get back before it gets dark or Mum will throw a huge fit"
Harry giggled as they got up.
Cedric mounted the broom, followed by Harry who once again sat in front of him but this time placed both his hands on the handle.
"Ready" Cedric asked.
"Ready"
Interior, Emergency Room, St. Mungo's - Night
Harry sprang up in his bed, loud wheezing gasps leaving his parted lips and his face was slicked with sweat. He looked around the dark room, only lit up the moonlight coming in through the windows and blinked his eyes multiple times.
The wheezing stopped but his breathing was still coming in ragged breaths, like he'd run a mile. He looked at the table beside his bed and leaned over to grab the glass of water. He gulped it all in one big breath. The glass filled back again and he finished it off even faster this time.
His eyes darted towards the red dot on the wall in front of him, blinking rapidly.
A few seconds later the door was pushed open and in walked a nurse. She turned the lights on with a flick of her wand and Harry shut his eyes with a grimace.
She walked towards him and stopped at the side of his bed.
"Mr. Potter" the elderly woman smiled. "I must say I wasn't expecting you to be up so early but then again, I should've known better" she chuckled good naturedly.
"Where am I?" his voice came out extremely gruff.
"You're in the emergency room at St. Mungo's" she replied.
He looked up at her and frowned. "Emergency, what am I-" His eyes turned wide. "Draco" he whispered.
He threw the cover covering his body on the floor before getting off the bed in one singular motion.
"Mr. Potter!" the nurse looked terrified by his behavior as she watched him limp towards the door.
"Fuck!" he looked over his shoulder at her. "What the fuck's wrong with my fucking leg" he growled.
She stammered for a moment before finding her voice. "You had a fracture. You had three broken bones and it will take some time for them to heal back properly"
"Is that it"
"Umm no... there were multiple cuts on your hands and knees and you were hit by a stunning spell. You'll feel some pain in your abdomen for the next couple of days"
"Where is Draco?"
Her eyes went wide before they turned down.
"WHERE IS HE!"
She jumped a foot in the air.
"He-umm...Mr. Malfoy's funeral was held today."
The colour drained away from Harry's face.
"His body was laid down in Roseburg Cemetery..." she trailed off, tears rolling down her cheeks.
Harry's gaze dropped to the floor before he closed his eyes.
"Don't" he whispered. "Don't you dare"
The seconds tickled by as the room was filled with the nurse's soft sobs and Harry's heavy breathing.
She wiped at her cheeks before looking at him, hunched over on the spot.
"How long have I been here" he asked hoarsely.
"Three days"
He swiped a hand through his hair before standing straight back to his full height. "Where are my clothes" he asked, looking ahead at the wall.
"Umm...Mr. Potter, healer Jenson said you're not to leave the hospital until she's spoken with you"
"WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES!"
Exterior, Roseburg Cemetery – Night
Harry put his hand on the wrought iron gate, gripping it tightly. He pushed it slowly before wobbling through the gap.
A clear, cobblestone path divided the large area, filled with hundreds of graves of different shapes and sizes. He continued walking ahead, his hands tucked inside his robe, which was billowing dramatically because of the wind.
He turned left and continued limping forward before stopping at a large gravestone. The name written on it was, Abraxas Malfoy
He looked to its left and his jaw clenched tightly. A tad smaller but equally beautiful gravestone, adorned with fresh flowers. He lifted his gaze towards the name and looked away immediately.
Draco Malfoy
5 June 1980 – 10 April 2018
A loving husband, a caring father, a dutiful son and a loyal friend.
"It's not fair" whispered Harry, staring at the stars shining above. He turned his gaze down and forced his eyes back towards the grave. He walked a couple of steps towards it before dropping on one knee with a slight grimace. He placed his right hand on the stone. "I'm sorry, my brother...I'm sorry, I couldn't save you...you've saved me all my life and when it was my turn..." his breath hitched in his throat. "I couldn't repay the favor...Just know that I won't stop till he's dead...you just hang on, alright." He then looked up at his friend's name and smiled "I know you won't listen and will continue to keep watching over me but...be at peace, rest. I got it from here." He sniffled. "You know I never believed in the afterlife bullshit, heaven, hell... but if there is one and you've managed to squeeze your way through the pearly gates...save me a spot, will you, because we both know I'm not getting in there on my own for all the shit I've done. But then again maybe I don't deserve it" he said more to himself.
He turned his head to the left and bit the inside of his cheek. "Hey, if you see him...tell him..." he shook his head. "No, don't do this...don't you fucking dare"
He kissed the stone before hastily getting up.
"I'll see you when I've brought him to justice, not before"
He turned around and stopped, his eyes landing on Hermione standing a few gravestones across from him.
She was wearing black jeans and a black wooly jacket.
They stared at each other for what felt like an eternity but in reality, was only a couple of minutes. Harry finally moved. Hermione's eyes snapped to his injured leg which was dragging along the ground as he was barely putting any weight on it.
He didn't stop when he reached her but continued to limp forward, eyes staring straight ahead.
"You need rest"
Her voice cut through the chilly air but it seemed to have fallen on deaf ears as he continued moving forward.
He reached the main lane that led to the gate and kept moving at a slow pace. Hermione reached him in no time and stopped in front of him. He glared down at her, a very dangerous glint in his eyes that had zero effect on her as she continued to stare at him determinedly.
"Your tissue was badly damaged; your bones need fully recovery time before they can function properly once more and the hit your chest took is of no joke. It may be a stupefy but it was a bloody strong one and if you don't want to wake up at night because of tear inducing painful cramps then I suggest you do as you're told" she said firmly in a no-nonsense tone.
It was like DeJa'Vu, only reversed this time as her words had zero effect on him. He walked past her.
"Did you not hear a word I just said!"
He continued moving forward.
"STOP!" she marched up to him and pulled harshly on his elbow, turning him around to face her. Her face was red with fury. "Did you not hear a fucking word I just said" she shrilled. "Stop being so stubborn for once and listen to what I'm is trying to tell you." she pushed back a loose tendril of hair that had fallen over her face. "The injuries you suffered are no joke. In time, they can cause problems in the future if they're not carefully monitored. Problems that can slowly turn fatal"
"Why do you care" he hissed, stopping her from going into another rant. "Where is all this coming from, huh" he took a step forward, making her involuntary take a step back. "Where was all this care and worry when we were still together" he spat.
"Together" she scoffed. "If your definition of being together is sleeping under the same roof then we have very different definition of what together stands for. But-" she stopped him from opening his mouth. "Even then I never shied away from taking care of you when you used to come back bloodied and bruised" A disgusted look came over her face. "How dare you. All those nights I took care of you, patched you, healed you so you could go back to wherever the fuck you used to go because you certainly were never home, you ungrateful fuck!"
His nostrils flared as he took another step toward her but she continued to barge on.
"And I care about Rose, because she still loves her father...I saw the look on her face when she first saw you lying on that bed. It was like she'd seen a ghost. I'd be damned if I ever see her look so scared, so small, ever again and if that means I have to break into that thick skull of yours then by God I will do that"
Harry leaned forward till his face was only inches away from her face. "Go fuck yourself" he whispered. "Or better yet, go fuck him"
Thwack!
Her handprint was quickly marking his right cheek.
In a blink and you'll miss it moment his hand was gripping her throat and she was pushed against the side of a tall gravestone.
"I told you this shit was getting old" he growled.
"And I told you I never fucked him" she whispered; her voice constricted by his grip. "Or anyone else"
He inched even closer till only a hair's breadth separated their lips. "I don't believe you" he whispered.
"I don't care"
The whole atmosphere in the air, and between them seemed to have changed into a thick tension as they continued to stare into each other's eyes.
His gaze dropped to her lips, as hers did to his.
The next second they apparated with a loud crack.
Interior, Master Bedroom, Second Floor, Mars, Godric's Hollow – Night
The moment their feet landed on the floor he pushed her against the wall adjacent to the bathroom door. He swallowed her hiss of pain as her head collided with the wall by capturing her lips. She gripped his shoulder length hair while opening her mouth wide and meshing her tongue with his.
He hooked her leg around his hip as he pulled her bottom lip between his teeth. She let out a small whimper which turned into a growl. She pulled hard on his hair, jerking his head away. They glared at each other, breathing heavily in each other's face.
His gaze dropped to her bruised lip as a drop of blood escaped it and trailed down to her chin. He lifted his right hand and swiped the trail with his thumb before pressing her plump bottom lip as they continued to gaze into each other's eyes with burning passion. He brought the thumb to his mouth and sucked it clean.
Her throat bobbed as she swallowed and ran her tongue along her lip.
A second later they were back at it, this time their lips working even more ferociously against each other. They slanted their heads further into an angle to deepen the kiss, their lips glued to each other and they never broke apart for even a millisecond. He hitched her leg higher while running his hand back and forth across her jean clad thigh while the other was busily groping her breast through her jacket.
Her left hand was moving haphazardly through his hair and between his shoulder blades while the other was trailing down his chest.
His hand stopped its ministrations on her chest and dropped to the hem of her jean. He opened the button with practiced ease before pulling down on the zipper. His hand slipped beneath her black knickers and a moment later she wrenched her mouth apart and let out a loud moan.
"Fuck!"
Her hands gripped his shoulders tightly as she bit her lip, her eyes shut tightly and her face contorted in a mixture of pain and pleasure.
"Umm..." she whimpered, when he licked a stripe from her throat all the way to her mouth. He pulled away when she stuck her tongue out to capture his, teasing her a couple of times before she seemed to have lost her patience and with an angry growl pulled his face towards her, bumping their noses together and swallowing his tongue.
She sucked on his tongue languorously, moaning, as lewd sucking noises filled the air around them. She rocked her hips as his hand continued to move beneath her panties, riding it. Her right hand dropped to the bulge in his pants, squeezing it.
He let out a groan as she tilted his head to kiss along his cheek before moving on to his ear. She nibbled the lobe between her teeth before enveloping it entirely between her lips and sucking it. She pulled away and with a parting peck trailed her lips down the side of his neck.
He pulled away and, in a motion so quick it shouldn't have been possible, had her jacket land in some corner of the room. He repeated the action with her white, patterned t-shirt.
Her black bra contrasted with her pale skin, the straps riding low on her shoulders. He wrenched the straps down her arms, dragging her bra down her torso where it hung just above her navel.
He bent down and attached his lips to her dusky pink nipples, sucking them ravenously. She let out a yelp of pain when he bit his teeth into it.
"Watch it!" she yanked his head back and glared at him. He blew a breath of air over her protruding flesh while never loosing eye contact and her grip loosened a little. He licked around the areola before tapping the tip of the nipple with his tongue.
She sighed and her eyes closed involuntarily as her hand dropped to her side. Hip lips encloses around the tip once more and he lavished the flesh.
"Yes..." she breathed, her finger weaving through his thick mop of head and massaging it gently as he continued to pay attention to her sensitive skin while his left hand rolled the nipple of other breast between his fingers.
He kissed his way down her stomach before stopping at her navel. His poked his tongue inside it.
She trembled visibly as a shiver ran through her.
He didn't linger long and soon had her jeans along with her knicker pooled around her ankles.
Her breath hitched in her throat as she stared at him with anticipation dancing in her eyes. His eyes were locked on to her cunt, a mass of curly brown hair covered most of the area. He seemed hesitant, unsure, as if reality just dawned on him and if not that then something else was truly bothering him with the way he was glaring at the thatch of brown hair covering her most intimate area.
"Is that proof enough for you?" she asked, her voice hard and laced with edge.
He looked up into her eyes. His jaw tensed immediately and his nostrils flared in anger. "No" he bit out, before standing up and turning his back to her. He ran a hand through his hair as she stepped out of her jeans and knicker and taking off her bra. She removed her shoes and socks, standing completely nude in the dim light of the room.
"Fine" she started, walking past him to stand before him. "Go on then" she opened her arms. "All my defenses are down" She glared. "Let's get this all out of the way now and be done with it for once and all, shall we. You want to know if I fucked him or not, go on then" her voice was getting higher with every word. "WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!"
The next second her eyes had a glazed look to them.
Hermione was standing near the railing; she had her right elbow resting over her left arm as she took a small sip from her wine glass. Her plaque was resting on top of the concrete balustrade.
She looked over her shoulder when she heard the door open and smiled as Rowan walked through. He smiled back as he approached her.
"Hey goofy" he said
"Hey snoopy" she replied.
She was giggling uncontrollably as they tiptoed their way down the corridor, a bottle of whiskey gripped in her hand and her other arm slung over his shoulder. His arm was holding on to her waist and she let out another snort of laughter when he tickled her under the ribs.
"Shh" he put his finger over his lips, and she silenced immediately, or at least tried to as small fits of laughter still escaped her. "We have to be quiet" he whispered. "You don't want Filch to catch us, do you"
A look of mock horror appeared on her face as she vigorously nodded her head. "Okay" she whispered.
They entered the room and Rowan pulled the door to close it but Hermione yanked on his arm and his hand slipped from the handle, leaving the door slightly ajar.
Chairs were placed around a large oval table in the middle. The only light coming in was through the windows.
They walked over to the other side of the room and Hermione sat the half-finished whiskey bottle on top of the counter.
"C'mon, let's have one more" he said, conjuring two glasses from thin air.
"No!" she groaned, walking away. She reached the back wall near the corner and turned around, leaning back against it and smiling lazily at him. "If I have one more, you'd have to carry me home"
He smirked, filling both glasses before strolling towards her. "I'd be more than happy to"
She shook her head as he lifted the glass towards her.
"C'mon" he rolled his eyes. "You've had seven. What's one more" he put the glass on the shelf next to her.
"Nope" she drawled, before dissolving into a fit of giggles.
"Merlin, when did you turn into such a pansy. The Hermione I knew once partied all night along and finished three bottles of firewhiskey when she found out she was made head girl"
She chortled. "We all do stupid stuff when we're young" she shrugged her shoulder.
"I don't see any stupidity in it." He turned serious "You had the most fun I ever saw you had at any point in your life. You were the most carefree, the happiest, unfiltered." He paused, as the smile dropped from her face. "I don't know where it says that as you get older you shouldn't be allowed to behave the same...fun is fun, age shouldn't compromise it"
"Age brings in responsibility. When you're young you think about no one except yourself, because you know you can't live like this forever and that this period wouldn't last, at least I did, which is why I had my fun when I was young and I'm satisfied with it"
"The Hermione I'm talking about would disagree."
She raised an eyebrow."Really" he nodded. "And how can you be so sure"
He sent her an arrogant smirk before replying. "Easy, I was her number one priority once and she was mine so I know all her secrets. I Know her better than anyone else" He then leaned closer. "More than even you"
It was her time to roll her eyes, which she did, quite exaggeratedly. "Please" she huffed.
"What, you don't believe me"
"No, because it's not true and doesn't make any sense because you're essentially talking about the same person which happens to be me"
He shook his head before clapping his hands, startling her. "It's not the same person."
"Now you're not even making any sense"
"Alright, what if I prove you wrong"
"And how would you do that"
"Leave that to me"
"Fine, but make it quick cause I don't have all day"
"It's night"
"I'm drunk"
"I know"
"Just get on with it"
"Ahh!" He waived a finger. "A bet" he said, before a loud burp escaped his lips.
"Ewww!" she wrinkled her nose in disgust as she punched him in the stomach.
"Sorry"
"And there will be no bet. I don't want to know what filthy thing you've cooking inside that head of yours"
"Fine" he shrugged his shoulder. "No bet, no proving" he said nonchalantly, admiring his nails.
She shot daggers at him before thumping her foot. "Fine" she grumbled.
"Ahh, you're too curious for your own good. You need to temper it down before someone takes advantage of you"
"Like you're doing right now" she snapped.
He winked "Touche"
"Whatever" she tapped her foot impatiently, crossing her arms over her chest.
"It's simple. The loser has to do one thing the winner says. It could be anything, within reason, of course"
She stared at him for a moment before nodding. "Alright"
"And you have to be honest" he inclined his head forward. "You can't lie and not admit when you believe I'm right"
"The same goes for you"
"It does"
"Good"
"Good"
A few seconds of silence passed by during which they kept staring into each other's eyes.
"You were always the responsible one, even in school, I mean sure you broke some rules but you were always the level headed, sensible one from the lot of us.
But you always had a youthful spirit and having a youthful spirit isn't about partying all night long or breaking rules. It's about living life freely, not caring what anyone else thinks or says about you, basically having a I-don't-give-a-fuck-what-you-think, this-is-the-way-I-am, deal-with-it attitude.
But now you've put on all these other facades to make people believe that that person doesn't exist. It has made you into a shell of a person. That's all you've managed to achieve, nothing else, and for what, for those who don't even know you, so they don't judge you, don't speak bad behind your back. I mean-why would you even want their gratification."
She swallowed. "I grew up. The changes came with that. No one is the same from when they were in school. Not even you"
He nodded. "I agree...but I never tried to change myself for others." He placed his palm over his heart. "It's the same me in here and it's never changing for anyone" He then pointed a finger at her. "Whereas you, you started molding yourself into someone I didn't recognize the moment your eyes landed on him" he finished in a whisper.
Her face hardened immediately and her eyes narrowed.
"No one was fooled, not even Cormac. You were just trying to fool yourself that you didn't crave his attention, that your eyes didn't light up the moment he walked into a room, that no one could get a smile out of you when he stopped harassing you and started avoiding you, that you didn't want him to avoid you. So, what did you do, you began pulling yourself away from us, your friends, for a stranger. You stopped spending time with us, attending our nightly get together and for some weird reason began spending a lot of your time at the quidditch stands."
He scoffed.
"No one was fooled, Hermione, not me certainly. You never came to any of my games, or Cormac's for that matter. But his...forget game, you even never missed his training and that was before you even got together, heck, you weren't even speaking with him at that point. That's when I started to notice this change and I hated you so, so much during that time, or tried to. But I couldn't because- anyway, the period after that is the worst time in my life. When you got together with him and every time I would see you, which soon turned to from fifteen minutes in a day to once a week, it would be a new Hermione.
I didn't recognize this person, so I gave up. And it wasn't the war that turned you into this, or puberty, it was him. You became selfish, cold, towards us, towards everyone, except him, everything took a back burner, your head girl duties, your nightly rounds, your studies!...everything, for him and look where that led you, hurtful memories, one after another"
"Stop it"
"I'm right"
"No! You're not!"
"Really! Then look in the mirror! Your eyes are dead, Hermione. They have been for so long I'm having hard time believing there was ever life in them"
"You know nothing about me! Or him!"
"I know he's not here!" he paused, as they both took heavy breaths. "Where he should be, beside you, holding your hand. I forgot the last time I saw him, not that I have any intention but the amount of time we've been spending together, not once has he been around. Heck, I don't think even you know where he is." He shook his head. "You know what this says about someone...that they've given up, that they no longer give two shits about their marriage. That's what this says and you changed yourself for this man."
He stepped back, putting his hands on hips and turning his gaze down. Hermione was forlornly staring down at the floor with a lost expression on her face.
A couple of minutes of silence later he whipped his head up to see her gulping the drink in one gulp.
His mouth quirked at the corner as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.
She put the glass back on the shelf and her turned her eyes towards him.
"I thought one more wouldn't hurt"
He stepped back towards her. "And you had me go through your history for just to come to that realization"
"Not just that" she whispered.
"What else" he whispered back.
She let out an audible gulp before opening her mouth. "I'm going to leave him"
An unrecognizable emotion took over his face before he furrowed his brow in question. "Are you sure?"
She nodded.
"Okay..." he seemed nervous to continue.
"What" she asked.
"Umm...I-I...the bet..."
"Go on" she smiled. "I'm not one to back down and that's the old Hermione speaking"
He smiled, before raising an eyebrow. 'Really"
"Really"
"Okay then..." he squared his shoulder before clearing his throat. "Kiss me"
Her eyes turned wide in surprise. "What" she gasped.
"Kiss me" he repeated, this time more firmly. "I-I love you, Hermione, always have" he gulped.
She continued to look at him in shock.
"You said it yourself that you're going to leave him which means that mentally you've left him long ago."
She turned her gaze down.
"Look, just one kiss. If you don't feel anything, then we won't talk about it, ever, I promise. But I feel that's not the case otherwise you would've slapped me to the other side of the room" he put his hands on her shoulder. "If this really is the old Hermione then she would take this chance, see where it leads her, not be afraid"
She finally lifted her head and met his gaze. Her expression turned rueful before she shook her head. "God, you've no idea the memories this brings. If you'd said this to sixteen-year-old me I would've been jumping up and down."
His eyebrows rose up to his hairline as he leaned back in surprise. "Are you fucking serious"
"Hmm" she smiled, nodding her head.
"Fuck" he blew a breath of air. "Guess, the timing truly fucked both of us didn't it"
Her expression turned serious. "But, I don't think this would be a good idea. I'm not in a right space of mind and it would mean nothing."
"You don't know that" he insisted.
She looked away, swaying slightly as the effects of the alcohol started weighing on her. "I'm drunk"
"Me too"
"I'm tired"
"Me too"
"I'm not talking about just right now"
"Neither am I"
She shifted her gaze back to him and released a long sigh. "I've always wondered what it would be like to kiss you"
He leaned closer to her. "Now's your chance"
She pushed herself off the wall and brought herself to her full height. He dipped his head down till their noses were almost touching.
She put her arms around his neck and closed the gap between them. It was the softest of touches. Their lips barely grazing each other and before long she pulled back and opened her eyes.
"Take your chance, Hermione. Be brave" he whispered.
Her eyes filled up but before a drop could fall, she smashed her lips to his. The difference between this kiss and the one before it was night and day. Tongues woven, teeth gnawing, lips nibbling, hands roaming.
He pushed her back against the wall and dropped one hand to the hem of her shirt before hitching the fabric up and slipping his hand beneath it, skimming his fingers against the taut skin of her stomach. His other hand was woven in her hair. She had her arms around his neck.
He shifted them around and hiked her up on the counter adjacent to the wall. Her hand hit the bottle of whiskey next to her before it crashed to the floor.
The sprang apart as if struck by a bolt of lightning.
They stared into each other's faces in a mixture of shock and unbridled passion lurking behind their eyes.
A look of horror came over her face and her face lost all its colour. She gulped before pushing him away. Hurt flashed across his eyes as she got down from the counter.
"I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me. This should've never happened"
"But-"
"No, Rowan!" she glared at him. "This is wrong, on so many levels" she pushed away a lock of hair. "I can't do this. God, what have I done" a distraught look came over her face.
"Hermione" he walked over to her. "Please, listen to me. We both felt something and you know it. So, what's so bloody wrong with it."
"EVERYTHING!"
"But why!"
"Because-because..."
"That's right, you can't name it because nothing's wrong"
"Then why do I feel like throwing up. Why do I feel this pain in my chest, this-this pain in my heart" tears were rolling down her cheeks.
"Because you think that's the way you're supposed to feel. But you don't"
She shook her head. "I need to leave, right now"
She started moving towards the door but he easily caught up with her and pulled on her arm. "Hermione, listen to me."
"No!"
"Please, I promise we won't talk about it."
She stopped walking and faced him.
"Not tonight"
"Not any night"
"We have to! Otherwise, we will never be normal with each other ever again and I don't want that. So, promise to me that we will talk about this" She wiped at her face and sniffled. "Hermione, please"
She looked up and gave him a small nod.
"Good" he brought her in for a hug. They stayed like that for a few minutes before he pulled back and kissed her forehead. "C'mon"
He pulled on her hand.
"Where are we going"
"I'm not letting you go home in this mood so like the best friend I am I'm not leaving you until you're smiling and happy"
She smiled wryly while rolling her eyes. "Rowan, you don't have-"
"Nope, not listening" he glanced at her over his shoulder and winked. "I made you cry, so now I'm going to make you laugh"
Her smile turned sad before she nodded her head.
They were walking on the footpath. Up ahead was a huge line of boisterous crowd that started at the entrance of the club named, The Hippogriff.
"Really Rowan. Your idea of making me happy is to take me to your nightclub. You know I hate these places"
"You used to love them once"
"That was a long time ago"
"Exactly, so turn back the clock and let's act like when it was just you and me"
She looked up at him and with a sigh, smiled. "Alright"
He smirked. "Excellent"
She was jumping up and down, mimicking the movement of everyone around her. Rowan was laughing hysterically when she tried to twerk her arse like the girl next to her.
"It wasn't funny!" she exclaimed indignantly, as they were walking in a dark lane that was devoid of human or any other presence for that matter.
"It was!" he burst into another fit of laughter as she punched his arm.
"Shut up and take me home!"
"Yes madam" he said with a salute.
They apparated onto the edge of the driveway.
Harry blinked his eyes before focusing them back on Hermione. The glazed look washed away from her honey-colored irises as she stared back at him. Her throat bobbed as she swallowed, a lone tear running down her face.
He closed his eyes and rolled his neck from one side to other, scratching his beard.
Hermione kept staring at him in return as she wiped at her eyes.
"I-" He sighed, opening his eyes. "Forget it, you're not worth it" he said casually before turning around and walking towards the door.
Hermione's expression turned into bewilderment as her mouth opened in surprise. "Hold on!"
He didn't listen and opened the door which was slammed shut the next second. He rubbed at his temple before turning around towards her.
Her cheeks were flushed with anger. "I'm not worth it!" she spat. "Fine, but you don't get to leave while I've had my answers. This works both ways"
He chewed the inside of his cheek. "No"
"No!" she exclaimed.
"No"
"And who're you to decide that" she hissed, stomping towards him barefoot.
"I'm the guy telling you, no"
She pushed him against the wall before jabbing her finger against his chest. "Why" she smiled darkly. "What's there to hide. I promise not to throw a fit like a good little wife. So, come on darling, give us a little peek at what you were up to when you decided to leave your wife and wandered off without saying a word." she hissed the last part.
"It'll break you"
"I'm not made of glass"
His jaw clenched. "You'll forget everything else, he won't matter, no one would matter, and I can't do that to Rose. As much as it pains me to say it, she is going to need her mother."
"Stop playing with me" she growled. "And stop making everything into this-this... life and death situation. The reality is you fucked up and now you don't even have the balls to own up to it."
He scoffed. "Didn't sound right coming from you. Wonder why"
"Keep wondering. At least I owned up to what I did. Ever since that moment I've thought of it as nothing but a mistake, and I've never felt guilt like that in my life but now, after this, whatever this is, I realized I don't feel the guilt anymore or maybe it wasn't a mistake because you know why-"
"No, enlighten me"
"Because any time we would've talked it would've ended the same way like it did the night you handed me the divorce papers. The kiss just sped the whole process up. Our end was inevitable. We didn't speak to each other for two fucking years! Two fucking years!" she panted. "Living in the same fucking house, in the same fucking room. That's not a normal relationship!"
"And that's my fault!" he roared back.
"YES!" She glared at him. "And mine, too." she added.
"Good" he bit out. "At least you're owning up to something"
"I'm the only one owning up here, asshole!"
"There is a difference between admitting to the shit you did after getting caught and coming forth and actually owning up to your fuck up. Spilling your dirty little secrets and serving them on a platter after getting caught isn't that. Besides, you're good at keeping secrets" he growled.
"You bet I am" she snapped back. "After all, I've had lifelong experience hiding yours from everyone else"
He inclined his head and breathed through his nose. "Listen, I've had it up to here with you" he raised his hand over his head. "Now, get the fuck out of my way before-"
"Before what!" she yelled. "Huh! Before what. What are you going to do! What can you do! Nothing! Beside blame others and moan, why, because for once you were left to handle shit on your own. Did you ever think that others were hurt too. That I was hurt! That not a moment went by I wasn't crying or feeling suffocated. I was having fucking anxiety attacks every fucking day! Did you ever notice! NO! I needed you as much as you needed me! But I didn't go around and started treating everyone like shit or pulled away from others. That was your fucking choice! That was your way of handling it! And you know what, even then I supported you. I made excuses for you...every day I had to make new shit up to cover for my husband. As if I didn't have my own shit to deal with!" her face was red with rage as she glared at him.
He swallowed before biting the inside of his cheek, eyes never leaving hers. His expression was neutral. "You never had to deal with the whispers, or the looks, or read it in the paper every morning. They all said one thing...blame." He pointed a finger at his chest. "They blamed me" his voice broke. "They said it was my fault...everyone, people who I thought were my friends, people I considered my family, people who were my family, my own fucking mother...even you"
A stricken expression came over her face and he nodded.
"Even you, mars. Even you" he whispered. "How could you..." he looked away and swallowed a lump. "Don't do it, don't you fuckin cry...don't" he sniffled, before facing her. "The bottom line is and I don't know if this is what you really want to hear and if it is then I have no problem saying it because I'm not ashamed to admit it...I've known it the moment I saw you...your eyes" he pointed his forefinger and middle finger at her brown orbs. "They said it all...and that is I'm not as strong as you. You were always the tough one between us. I've lived most of my life in fear, and to hide that fear I put on this façade. The moment I heard Sirius and Remus tell mum and dad that Cedric was dead my life changed on its head. From then on, it was the fear of not living up to him, fear that at any given moment my parents could be next, or others I loved.
The fear of losing others was so strong that I never once cared or thought about dying myself. Then you came and it ten folded. I had to keep you close, protect you, always in my sight. We build a life, a beautiful family, one I never imagined of having because I never thought I would live long enough for it to happen. But I did and we did. You made my life whole and made me the happiest man alive and I can never thank you enough for that. But that fear, it was always there. It never left. But by then I had long mastered at hiding my emotions, you know that better than anyone. The fear became real that day..."
His face contorted to a look of pure pain as a dry sob escaped his lips. "My boy...my son, taking his last breath as I held him in my arms...pleading with me to save him...that he didn't want to die..." He shook his head, wiping at his eyes. "I wasn't strong enough to handle that...no father should've to go through that."
Hermione was openly crying now, silent sobs escaping her mouth as she put her hands over her face.
A humorless chuckle left his lips as he shook his head. "And they blamed me...everyone...you..." He shrugged his shoulder. "That can turn any person, no matter how pure of a heart they have, into something that even they don't recognize and I'm just...well me"
He sniffled, wiping the tears away that had escaped his eyes. "You want to know why I went, where I went, what I did...fine. As you said, let's get this over with so we can put it behind us." she removed her hands and looked up at him, the tears continuing to trail down her flushed cheeks. "After this, I never want to see you, unless it's something to do with Rose, and I most definitely never want to talk to you. You go your way; I go my way."
She wiped under her nose as she ducked her head, trying to hide her shock at his words. She looked up and nodded.
"Go on, then"
He spread his arms wide.
"Avada Kedavra" the green light left Harry's wand and headed for the man dressed in all black. He had long flowing hair that was parted in the middle. The spell pierced through him, blowing a hole in his chest.
The man dropped to his knees before falling face forward. Harry's eyes turned wide when they landed on the little boy sprawled on the floor behind him. He turned his head as aurors bustled into the room, led by Draco. He looked at the man before turning to Harry with a huge smile. "You did it!" he enveloped him in a big hug.
"The boy" he whispered.
Draco pulled back and frowned. "What"
Harry pointed in the direction of the boy.
Harry was standing in his office with Martin and Draco. His head was ducked down.
"Harry, it's not your fault" Martin sighed. "Your spell was so strong that it cut right through Rubnok and the kid was in the wrong place in the wrong time. Simple. So, don't beat yourself over it"
"I'm resigning"
"Don't be stu-"
"I'm resigning!"
"Okay" Martin held his palm up. "Here's what we'll do. You take a break. A long break and then when you come back, we'll talk. I'll handle the media. No one will know about the kid"
Now, it was just Harry and Draco standing in the room.
"Think about it"
"There's nothing to think. I'm done"
"Harry-"
"THERE'S NOTHING TO THINK. IF I DO, I'LL KILL MYSLEF. I SPENT FOUR FUCKING YEARS TO KILL THAT BASTARD...TO AVENGE MY SON...AND WHEN IT FINALLY HAPPENED...I-I...SEEING THAT BOY LYING ON THE FLOOR... IT BROUGHT ALL THE MEMORIES...HE HAD THE SAME EXPRESSION KAI HAD."
"Fine...What are you going to do"
"I don't know. I need to get away or I fear I'll do something. No one's safe around me, anymore"
"What about, Hermione?"
"She'll be fine. I don't think she even knows I exist anymore"
"What can I do"
"Stay away from me and don't try and contact me"
"Fine, but you also promise me something. That when you get back, we'll have a talk. A real talk, about everything"
Harry opened the room and looked around the shabby room. The walls had cracks on them, colour was coming off. There was a wooden chair next to a single bed and a small kitchen to the side. A door that led to the bathroom.
He closed the door behind him.
He was sitting at the bar, the glass empty before him. He motioned the bartender to fill it, which he did. He drowned it one gulp.
He was sitting in a private room with neon lights, the music of the club muffled through the walls. There were two other men sitting opposite him. The table between them had lines of white powder spread all over it. The man with blonde hair handed Harry a rolled-up note which he then used to snort the powder into his nose.
He was lying on the floor, empty cans of beer strewn all across the carpet. Drool was coming out of his mouth.
He was once again in the neon room but this time was injecting a needle into his forearm.
He was in his room, smoking a joint and holding a bottle of beer in his other hand.
He was in different club; this one had a much darker interior.
"Here take this" the blonde-haired man handed him a red pill.
Harry took it from his hand and swallowed it.
He was leaning against the pole, arms folded across his chest as he stared at Hermione through the window. She was skimming through the pages of a book.
He was smoking a joint while simultaneously snorting the white powder from the floor. He was in a kneeling position.
He was lying on the floor on his stomach, completely nude. Empty beer bottles lay a little further from him and a pack of cigarettes next to his forearm.
He was in the private room; scantily clad girls were moving sensually on a pole and the men around him were all cheering and hooting but he was staring off into space. His mouth was parted and his irises were blown wide.
He was snorting a line of white powder in his room.
He swallowed a blue pill as everyone around him were dancing off to the beat.
He was watching Hermione through the window as he sat on the bench across the street.
He vomitted into the toilet bowl. He looked into the bowl and saw some red mix in with the yellow puke.
He was draped over the chair, one leg hanging off to the side and his head lolling on the other side. A needle was sitting on his lap and a trail of blood was running down his forearm.
He was staring into the mirror, holding a knife to his wrist.
"AAAH!" He screamed before pulling the knife up and cutting himself on the bicep. "ARGH!"
He was snorting the white powder from the kitchen shelf.
He woke up with a start and looked around. He was in a hospital bed, in a wizarding hospital. The door opened and a woman stepped inside.
"Mr. Potter, you're up."
"Where the fuck am I!" He yelled.
"You are at the St. Vincent's Hospital in Brighton. Your friend brought you in last night"
"My friend?"
"Yes, blonde haired fellow, Mr. Atherton. You wouldn't remember. He found you unconscious in your room."
"Where are my clothes"
He tried to get up but she pushed him back. "Mr. Potter, you can't leave. Firstly, you're in no condition and second, I need to discuss something extremely important with you"
"I don't, so why don't you back the fuck off"
"Mr. Potter! You will do as you're told if you care even the slightest bit about your health"
"I don't so you can shove-"
"You have Ramin"
He whipped his head in her direction, the colour draining from his face. "What" he whispered.
"Ramin, Mr. Potter. The most dangerous and the only illness which as of yet, has no cure. One can only be diagnosed with it if their magical core has been damaged deeply. You have abused your body in ways that I can't even fathom. The drugs, muggle and magical both, the alcohol, had such an effect on your magical core that it damaged the seplinta, one of the most important parts that make up the magical core. It's also known as a healing string because without it, the healing process can take ten times as long. Even a small injury can take days to heal. Not to mention the pain. Normally, magical folk don't feel half the pain the muggles do, or the level of pain is far less. Take a stunning charm for example, it's force and power is nothing less than a bullet. A muggle can die on spot but a wizard or witch, they can recover in hours. You don't have that advantage now. But you're lucky in the sense that you have one of the if not the most powerful magical cores ever known. It's been documented and now is even part of History books taught at Hogwarts. But still, even your core can't prolong your life because apart from the seplinta, your main source of power, the verun line, the most important part of your core, has also been damaged, and it's slowly dying"
He was now dressed in his clothes and leaning against the wall, staring at the floor.
The healer was seated across from him in a chair.
"Your extremely lucky your friend found you, if it had been some muggle...merlin I can't even imagine. Muggle medicine can't help you in this and I'm afraid neither can we"
"How long do I have"
"With your core I'd say 18 months, and that's if you drop the drugs, the alcohol, right this moment. On top of that no exertion on your body"
"And if I don't"
She glared at him before opening her mouth. "10...maybe 12 months" she gritted.
"No one can know about this, you hear me"
Hermione stepped back; terror written on her face as she stared at him with wide eyes.
Harry gave her a sad smile before shrugging his shoulder. "Now you know"
He apparated the next second, leaving her to stare at the vacant spot.
A whimper escaped her lips as she backtracked till her legs hit the edge of the bed. She dropped on the bed and covered her face in her hands as loud sobs shook her frame.
A/N: As always, post your comments and let me know your thoughts and I'll catch you on the flip side.