Disclaimer: Dragon Age characters, settings, and all in-game dialogue property of Bioware. I only own my Hawke, Roxanne, and my wonderful Inquisitor, Mhyrra.^^

After letting Sera grab Zinger at her insistence, all three of them crossed through the courtyard under the stars to the dungeon's only entrance. It was currently empty, so there was only a quartet of guards on mandatory rotation, who jumped at attention as they passed.

Considering Corypheus had command of an Archdemon, who knows what other winged monstrosities he could potentially have use the hole in the wall as an entry point?

Currently however, the only occupant they found in the otherwise empty blasted chamber was merely named after a winged beast, and even then, seated perilously on the edge of the abruptly torn walkway, hunched over and gazing emptily out the hole into the distance, it was clear whatever wings she might have once had, had long since been clipped.

Time to start remedying to that.

All day Mhyrra had been dispensing a listening ear and calm advice. With the occasional dabble of some tough love. From what she'd understood, she and Hawke had once been of similar dispositions, and perhaps still were.

But Roxanne Hawke was not merely a woman who needed to be helped mend the image she now had of the world and, much more poignantly, herself. Nor was she a scared child who didn't know how to deal with new feelings or people.

She was someone who needed help getting her head out of her arse.

But like any good warrior, unless you were so ludicrously more 'powerful' than your opponent, which she did not believe she was for a second, you don't go straight for the overhead blow unless you want to either trip or get a blade in the gut. You needed to scratch the armour, dent and chip it until you see the red of the problem's heart.

In this case, her softening blow came in the shape of a charming, hirsute dwarf.

"Hawke. There you are." Varric spoke up softly as he trotted up to her, Mhyrra and Sera hanging back for now.

Roxanne didn't turn, though she did answer.

"Varric. Sorry for sulking off on everyone like some gritless brat. Some help I turned out to be." Her voice was quiet, flat.

"Urgh, Hawke it's only been a day!" Varric protested. "Come on Roxxy, lighten up!" He hoped dipping into the nickname he'd finally given her after so much prodding back in the day, would at least shake her up a little.

An accurate gamble, seeing as Roxanne finally cracked a twitch of her lips corners, straightening a tad.

Maybe a softening blow would be all they needed tonight, Mhyrra pondered.

"I remember when you finally started calling me that." Hawke mused. "After we got back from the fiasco at Chateau Haine, and I'd practically strapped you to a chair until you caved to calling me something other than 'Waffles'."

"I remember." Varric responded with a feigned groan. "Rivaini and Aveline were particularly eager to help you tie me up."

"Yep." The corner twitched further. "Admittedly, still not a very original effort on your part, but at least it was…something." She trailed off.

Varric grew forlorn. "Now why can't you look at what you did, what you're doing right now, in the same way, especially when it was a whole lot better than just 'something'!"

"Because what I did was and is why the world is so screwed right now, Varric!" Her suddenly yelling as she stood, rounding on him, startled him into backing up.

Seeing her best friend backing away from her sobered her right quick, raising her armoured hand to cover her face as she heaved a world-weary sigh. You'd think she was about to start crying.

"If I hadn't been so gullible…if I'd seen the prideful, stupid little girl instead of a cheery younger sister…if I'd seen the monster instead of the man…"

"Hey!" Varric barked. "None of that is on you, Roxanne!" Recognizing the situation as too serious for nicknames right now, he pushed further. "If Thedas needs someone to blame, they can pin it on me! If I hadn't lead us all on that Maker-sodding Expedition…If I hadn't lead you straight to Corypheus' prison, you and the world wouldn't be dealing with half of this crap right now!"

Hawke balked, as if he'd just told her he was part Qunari.

"You were only trying to help me!"

"Exactly! And you were just trying to help everybody!" He hollered, trying desperately to make her see. "You tried as hard as you can, and you know what? For all that me, Aveline, Fenris and Isabela always gave you grief about sticking your nose were it didn't need to be, we ALL think you did just great!

But you can't blame yourself or your help for the shit we all pulled anyway! Anders wound up with a Demon howling in his head, tricked you, betrayed you, blowing up the Chantry and kicking of a war, and you shanked him in the ribs for his crimes, even if I know it felt like tearing your arm off! Merrill practically had to kill her mother because of her damn crazy ideas, but you never forced her to push things that far, and you sure as shit didn't tell Marethari you couldn't handle any demon that came our way!

And all this isn't even getting into everything the rest of us, and not to mention the rest of the world pulled, even while all you tried to do was help! It's not your fault, Roxanne!"

Silence as the wind howled in through the chasm in the wall.

"Yes…it is." Hawke ground out harshly, full of self-loathing, as she tightened the fist at her side.

"I was your leader. You were my family. I was supposed to take care of you.

The truth? The nasty, horrible truth that the world would shudder in horror and disgust if it ever found out and believed it? I didn't even care what happened to the city, or the world, as long as you all were safe and happy!

But what do I even have to show for it in the end? Hmm?!" She demanded as she stomped a foot forward. "A city in flames, a world in ruins, my mother dead…and my family shattered."

Like a snuffed candle, the fire disappeared and Roxanne crumpled onto all fours, head hanging as tears streamed silently from her eyes.

"I'm no hero…I'm more selfish than Isabela ever was...I'm a bigger fool than Merrill ever was…and I'm a greater monster than Anders could have ever dreamed to be…"

Dead quiet. Varric was completely floored, utterly lost as to what to do or even say, excruciatingly pained to see his greatest friend hurting so terribly. Sera looked on, genuinely downcast and teary-eyed, Zinger still slung to her back and drawing it the furthest thing from her mind.

They both snapped out of it when they heard the wood creaking.

Mhyrra stood before Hawke, arms crossed and gazing down at her, stare not unkind but unreadable.

"So tell me then. By your own reasoning, what exactly would be stopping me from shoving you off this mountain right this instant, dealing you the same punishment as them?"

Varric and Sera both started. Varric clamped onto her leg and Sera ran up to jump on her back, knotting herself around her torso.

"Myrri! Did you go completely batty?!" Sera shrieked in her ear.

Neither Roxanne nor Mhyrra budged.

"You wouldn't." the former responded without emotion.

"…You're right, I could never do such a thing in a million years." Mhyrra admitted, uncrossing her arms and letting them hang loose.

The other two deflated with relief, releasing her.

"But there are others in the world, some of them within this very Inquisition, who would. Some of them even with a sick glee. And I'm curious to know what your answer to them would be."

"…I don't have one."

"I think you do." Mhyrra countered. "The same reason why you would fight back if anyone tried. The same reason why I would never do it. Because you still have people in this world you still care for, and who care for you. And you know it."

Hawke lifted her head, eyes bleary.

"What…?"

"Hawke, you tried so hard to keep your family safe, tried to shoulder all their burdens and their mistakes. And while they might have turned out 'better' for it, barring obvious exception, all you end up from it is broken. Now how is that fair, let alone family? Family helps each other."

She crouched down.

"And I firmly believe that if you would just let them, if you tell them where you are, they'll come running, screaming and shouting about where their big sister is. Or in the case of this Fenris fellow from what I gather, spouse. I can promise you they'll be a place waiting for them here." Mhyrra assured. "Just as there is still one for you, if you still chose it.

So let them, Hawke. Let your family help you shoulder the burden of you for a change."

Roxanne sat there, blinking away the tears, shaking.

"I…I can't." She pleaded.

"Yes. You can." Mhyrra retorted simply. "Far be it from me to tell you that you should, but sending a few ravens is hardly impossible compared to slaying the Arishok or saving the Gallows."

Roxanne let out a choked laugh.

"Well it's hardly as if I could stop you."

"It's your choice, Hawke." Mhyrra riposted quietly, standing back.

Moments ticked by, then Roxanne swivelled back shakily onto her knees, turning towards a hopeful looking Varric.

"…Just…Just send the bloody ravens before I come to my senses…" She uttered weakly, shoving her head in her hands.

Varric allowed himself a fraction of a second to look more relieved than Mhyrra had ever seen him, before he turned to her, looking serious.

"I need a slick quill, quick-drying ink and Leliana's fastest birds."

"Varric, I've seen that dwarven-forged pen you use, and I've never seen you use anything but quick-drying ink." Mhyrra quipped with a wry grin. "For the rest though, tell Leliana to give you anything you need."

Varric allowed himself a chuckle. "I know. I just always wanted to say that."

Hawke burst into a laughing fit in her hands that sounded unmistakeably mixed with crying.

Softening, Varric stepped forward and took her by the hand, tugging at her gently to stand.

"Come one Roxxy. You'll have to sign or else they'll never believe me."

The fit sparked up again, but she nonetheless stood, shaky but she stood, starting to follow Varric to the door.

Varric paused as he passed Mhyrra, looking up at her dead in the eyes to convey total sincerity.

"Thanks Mhyrra."

She smirked in response.

"Why, Master Tethras, I believe that is the absolute first time I've ever heard you use my name. Nevertheless, I did little. This never would have been possible without your masterful touch and flair." That last bit was nothing short of honesty. Who knew the dwarven version of a softening blow was the equivalent of a sledgehammer?

Varric chuckled. "Yep, what would you ever do without me, Sparky?"

"…Really Varric?" Mhyrra deadpanned, though the grin was still in place. "You couldn't have picked something that doesn't refer to the obvious fact that I have a penchant for lightning magic? Or that at least doesn't sound so similar to Dorian's?"

"Nope, sorry, better nicknames are reserved for those who tie me to a chair while inappropriately handling Bianca." Varric still shivered at the memory even through his own grin, Roxanne faintly smiling behind him.

"Don't tempt me."

"What? "Myrri" is taken." A nod to the smiling Sera. "And besides, you 'light the spark of hope and goodness wherever you go', remember?" He explained with his grin growing cheekier.

"…Good night, Smartass Dwarf."

"And a good evening to you, maladies!" He tossed back, waving, as he and Roxanne disappeared through the door.

"Is she…gonna be alright?" Sera asked with a worried glance to Mhyrra.

She shrugged her shoulders. "In all brutal honesty? I don't know. I'd like to believe she'll be better, though I can't say when exactly, and evidently, I'm not the best person to help her. I never claim to have all the perfect answers, Sera. I just tried as best as I could, and now it's out of my hands. The rest, whatever it may be, lies with her and those who still care for her." She explained quietly, looking towards the door.

"You don't?"

"Not really." Sera looked as if she'd just swallowed an egg whole. "But I would appreciate the chance to come to do so. Which would be rather hard if she winds up making a martyr of herself. Hence…" She trailed off, peering at Sera with a lopsided smile and quirked brows.

Sera cackled. "Oh, you great big softie, you."

"Shh. Don't tell anyone." Mhyrra mock-mimed.

Sera laughed again before quieting. She looked down before speaking in a small tone uncommon for her.

"Look, m'sorry."

Now Mhyrra's quirked brows where from confusion.

"For what?"

"About before. Thinking you might actually toss her over. Piss, I know you better than that, shite-damnit!" Sera fretted.

Mhyrra laid a hand on her shoulder to still her.

"Sera, you also know me well enough to know I could hardly get upset at you for that, considering the obvious circumstances. Far better that than knowing you would just placidly stand by while I murdered someone."

Sera blinked, seeing the point.

"But I also saw you earlier, after what Varric said. What's really eating you, love?"

Sera looked to the side.

"Just…what Varric said. About still wanting to think none of this shite is real, and findin' out the hard way you need to do better?" She sighed, lowering her eyes. "I guess we all really should start carryin' round' mirrors everywhere we go…"

Mhyrra clasped her other shoulder.

"Sera, what have I been telling everyone all day? While you were standing right there next to me the whole time?

Really living is about making mistakes, learning, growing from it and to never stop trying with all you heart." She cupped Sera's chin and lifted her eyes to hers, smiling. "The fact that you're standing here, telling me all this, means I've hopefully managed to teach that to not one, not two, not three, but five people today. I'd call that a success any day of my life."

Despite being warmed at the words, Sera rolled her eyes exaggeratedly with a theatrical huff. "Can you even turn it off?"

"For you, malady? Never."

"Ugh." Sera feigned. Then she began pulling Mhyrra along towards the door.

"Where are…?"

"What? I told you it would be grass-smushing time after we finished with everyone's frowny faces!" She cackled. "I'll show you 'seeing stars'!"

Mhyrra sighed, closing her eyes briefly, and dug in in her heels, grinding them to a halt. When Sera turned to look at her, puzzled, she yanked her up by the hand into her arms, Sera yipping in response.

"Sera. After everything that's happened today, and everything we'll subsequently have to get done tomorrow, we're going to need our sleep." She stated firmly. "If you're really going to insist we dance tonight, it's going to be in my room, "blitz" level, and with extra sizzle." She peered into Sera's now-wide gaze. "Still feeling up to it?"

Sera shivered.

Author's Note: Welp. Not gonna claim I'm the master of emotional drama. But hey, as Mhyrra said, you try and you learn!^^
And to do that, I would very much appreciate any feedback you guys can give me!
Cheers, Warm Tidings and Happy Holidays to You and All Your Kin Everyone! Y'All are Awesome and Wonderful!