DISCLAIMER: Still don't own any characters etc
A/N: I am struggling to know where to go from here. So please if anyone has any ideas, let me know! :)
"Jane Clementine Rizzoli, will you be my girlfriend?"
Jane looked at Maura in disbelief. Disbelief that this incredible woman in front of her loved her. Disbelief that she wanted to be with her. Jane considered herself to be a broken woman after Hoyt, the shooting at the precinct and the many other incidents she had survived. She failed to see what she could possibly offer Maura. The intelligent, worldly, beautiful woman that was Maura Isles.
Maura, being unaware of the internal fight Jane was combating, mistook Jane's silence for rejection. "Maybe I should go." Tears were streaming down her face.
Maura's voice broke Jane from her thoughts. When she saw the tears streaming down the M.E's face, she immediately ran over to her and embraced her.
"I'm sorry Maur, I was lost in my own thoughts. I just have to pinch myself Maur. I really don't know why you would want to be with me. But of course I will be your girlfriend sweetie. And let me tell you one thing." She pulled away from Maura, instantly missing the beautiful doctors warmth. She knew though she needed to look into Maura's eyes, to allow the doctor to see the truth behind her next statement. "I'm going to shout it from the BPD rooftop that the great Dr Maura Isles is my girlfriend"
Maura smiled before her brain got the better of her. "Jane, I hardly think it is safe to be on rooftop of the BPD. You could easily..." Maura was interrupted as the detective pressed her lips to the doctor's.
The kiss started out sweetly but quickly turned heated and passionate. A moan escaped yet neither knew from where it originated. They were simply lost in the moment, lost in each other.
"I've missed you." Jane whispered as their lips momentarily parted. Maura felt Jane's warm breath against her lips and couldn't suppress her moan. Jane's voice turned sultry "I have really missed you" she rasped as her hands moved to squeeze the doctor's ass.
"Mmm... Bed...Bedroom...Jane..."
"Oh I love being able to turn the incredible Dr Isles into a stuttering mess!" Jane teased as she grasped the doctor's hand and led her to the bedroom.
"Mmm, now I understand all they hype about make-up sex" Jane teased, one arm holding her lover in a tight embrace, the other hand gently tracing lines across the skin of the doctor's forearm.
Maura pulled her head off of Jane's chest so she could look the detective in the eye. "Jane, please don't ever do that to me again. I won't be able to survive if you run again. Please Jane." Maura inhaled deeply, trying desperately to hold in the tears that were threatening to spill out.
"Maur, I truly am so sorry. I love you and I will never run away from that again. You truly mean the world to me. I was so scared and selfish and I will forever be sorry for being the cause of your pain. I promise I will make it up to you everyday for the rest of our lives."
"I was afraid you were ashamed of me." Jane looked at the M.E. in disbelief. She hated herself for how she had made her best friend feel.
"I could never be ashamed of you. On the contrary Maur. I have done a lot of stupid things in my life, a lot of things I am ashamed of. But you... You make me proud of myself. Being with you is the greatest achievement of my life." Maura's now shed her tears unabashedly. All her life people had avoided her, her own parents made her feel like an outcast, so to hear Jane express those loving words made her break down.
Jane pulled the honey-blonde as close as physically possible and held her until her sobbing had slightly subsided. "Talk to me sweetie, why are you crying?"
"I... My... Constance..." Maura was unable to voice her pain as her sobbing once again took over. But she had said enough for Jane to understand. 'How could I be so careless' the detective thought to herself.
"Oh Maur. I am so sorry. I know your parents have never had the time for you. I know you feel that they are ashamed of you." Jane herself had now joined Maura in her sobbing. "I...How could I...do this to you..." She knew that she needed to make this right. And the first step was to stop her tears. She took a deep breath and pulled herself together before continuing. "I... I never intended to hurt you, but I did. And I will make it right. I was selfish, but it was never about me being ashamed of you. It was about my own insecurities. Insecurities I should have faced before I allowed them to take over. Insecurities I should have battled before I hurt you. It baffles me that you could ever think that anyone would ever be ashamed of you. And I know I have unwittingly added to the doubts you have about yourself, but I really need you to believe what I am saying sweetie. Maur, do you believe that what I am saying is what I truly feel?"
Maura looked up into Jane's deep brown eyes, eyes laced with unshed tears and emotions. "Yes" was the only word she could manage to sound.
"Good, well listen carefully because I want to enlighten you about the Maura Isles I know and love. The Maura Isles that I know you don't see. She is just incredible. Honestly, it's hard to express in words just how amazing she is. There should be a dictionary full of words used only to describe her. Because she is unlike any person I have ever met. She's incredibly intelligent, she knows everything there is to know about anything important." Jane couldn't help but giggle to herself as she thought of all the times Maura had gone google-mouth on her. She held Maura's hands in her own and continued. "Yet she is humble. She has never really been shown true love and yet somehow, through some miracle, she has shown me love far greater than I ever thought possible. Far greater than I deserve." Jane's thumbs gently rubbed the M.E's hands as Maura sat silently, taking in this rare exhibition of Jane's feelings. "She is the only person in the world who I truly listen to. That's a real achievement." Jane beamed as Maura giggled at her last statement. "She can make me eat kale and join her at yoga. She can talk me down when I am having a heated argument. She just has a hold over me but I wouldn't have it any other way. Because having her in my life makes me so proud. She makes me proud. Proud to be her best friend. Proud to be her girlfriend. I feel grateful that she wants to even spend time with me. It is an achievement to even have this woman in your life. And I count her as my greatest blessing. It is my greatest honor to love her." Jane paused and made sure she had Maura's full attention before finishing. "Don't you think that sounds like someone you should get to know and embrace Maur?"
Maura was all cried out. She had no tears left. Of this, though, she was glad. Otherwise she would have been a blubbering mess at this point. Instead pulled Jane closer and gently kissed her. "There was at least one statement in there that is completely incorrect though Jane."
Jane looked at Maura in disbelief and confusion. "What do you mean?"
"You've shown me what true love is Jane. You have shown me what it means to have family. I will forever be grateful for that. I love you."
"I meant every word I said. I will always love you and I will forever think you are way to good for me. Because you are. I don't think anyone could ever truly be worthy of you. But for some reason you love me. And I will make sure I do my very best every day to try and be worthy of you."
Jane leaned in and once again captured Maura's lips with her own before they were interrupted by Jane's phone ringing. Jane loudly groaned before reaching over and answering the phone. "Rizzoli"
Jane turned to Maura and rolled her eyes before mouthing 'my mother'. Maura couldn't help the soft giggle that escaped her mouth.
"Yes Ma, Maura is safe, she is here with me." "No Ma, we don't need you to come over with breakfast" Another roll of the eyes from Jane. "Yes Ma, we are ok." Maura noticed the change in Jane's voice, she had become very sincere all of a sudden. "Thanks for you help. And thank you for looking after her." Jane gently kissed Maura's cheek. "Ok, see you later."
"Your mother is very sweet Jane." Maura knew the reaction her statement would elicit and she wasn't disappointed as Jane threw her head back on the bed and covered her face with a pillow.
"What are your plans for today Jane?"
The brunette pulled the pillow from her face and sat up in the bed. "Well Maur, I actually have some errands to run today but can I come over for dinner tonight? And maybe stay the night?"
"Of course, I would love that." Maura had wanted to ask what errands Jane had to attend to but something told her not to ask. A few hours away from each other couldn't hurt them anyway. And she was happy that she would have Jane with her in bed tonight.
"But I would love to cook you breakfast first." The detective leaned down to place a kiss on Maura's temple before rising off the bed. Turning around she offered a hand to the honey-blonde and pulled her up off the bed before leading her to the kitchen.
Jane found herself at the jewelers not really knowing what she was looking for. She knew she wanted to buy Maura something special, to make her feel loved but she had no idea what to actually buy.
"Can I assist you?" Jane jumped slightly as the store assistant broke her thoughts.
"Ah yes. I want to buy my girlfriend a present. I think maybe a ring?" Usually the store assistants did nothing but bother Jane. She always knew what she wanted and where to get it so she always deemed their interruptions unnecessary. This time however, was much different. She didn't even buy jewelry for herself, let alone as a present. So this time the lady's interruption was most welcomed.
"Oh how lovely. How about a promise ring?"
"That sounds perfect!" Jane was already glad she had asked for help. But as the store assistant pointed her towards to promise rings, her face lit up. For right there in front of her was the perfect ring for Maura. And seeing the ring gave her a marvelous idea. "Do you know where I can get the ring engraved?"
Jane had wanted to give Maura the ring at dinner the night before but it just didn't seem to be the right time. She needed it to be perfect. So she awoke early the next morning, carefully slipping out from underneath Maura's embrace and quickly getting to work.
Maura woke up to an empty bed and was overcome with a profound sadness. She had thought that her and Jane had worked out their problems and Maura had anticipated to wake up in Jane's arms. Instead, there was cold and empty sheets where her detective should be. She felt a tear involuntarily roll down her cheek. She was about to get herself out of bed when she heard footsteps and looked at the doorway to see the Jane walking towards the bed with a tray in hand.
Jane saw Maura's tears and quickly placed the tray on the bed before sliding next to the doctor and pulling her into a warm embrace. "What's wrong sweetie?" She asked, her brow furrowed in concern.
"I thought you had left. I'm sorry I was just being silly."
"Maur, I was just cooking breakfast." Jane stated, giving Maura a sympathetic smile. "I promised you I wouldn't run and I meant it. I am never leaving your side again, even if you tell me to. I'm not going anywhere." She sealed her words with a loving kiss. "Now let's eat breakfast."
Jane placed the tray on the M.E's lap as she examined it's contents. There was scrambled eggs and bacon, obviously for Jane to consume. There was also oats and fruit for Maura. There was coffee for them both, of which Maura took a quick sip to ascertain whether or not Jane had made her instant. She was both shocked and pleased to find Jane had used her fancy coffee machine. Finally there was a small vase of flowers and what looked like a ring. Maura's heart instantly raced. She knew she loved Jane but she wasn't ready for a proposal.
Jane could see the worry in her eyes as she stared at the ring. "This isn't a proposal Maur. It's a promise. Have a closer look." She offered sweetly, as her hand rubbed up and down her girlfriend's back.
A very relieved Maura smiled back at Jane as she picked up the ring to inspect it. It was a stunning gold ring with a two hearts, their names engraved on each side of the hearts and the words 'My heart is yours' etched on the inside. Maura once again felt tears swelling in her eyes, but this time due to overwhelming happiness and love. "Oh Jane, this is beautiful. Did you know that among the Ancient Greeks the origin of rings was connected with the idea of a pledge and keeping something constantly on one's mind?"
Jane smirked at her girlfriend's ever present google mouth. "No I didn't but that is precisely what this ring is about Maur. You are my girlfriend but you are so much more. You are my soul mate, you better me every day. I don't want one more day to go by without you by my side. So this ring is my reminder to you that I adore you and that my heart is yours always. So that if we fight you can look down at your hand and remember that I love you. So that if you have a bad day, you can look at the ring and know that at the end of the day I will be home waiting to make you feel better. I will always protect you, I will always adore you and I will always, always love you. That's my pledge. That's my promise." She leant forward and placed a loving kiss on Maura's cheek before wiping away the tears that now tracked their way down Maura's face.
"Thank you Jane. This is beautiful. And it fits perfectly!" The smile on Maura's face was quite possibly the largest Jane had ever seen. This alone made the detective extremely happy. For once she had made the right decision. For once she had brought the love of her life happiness instead of sadness. Her mind regressed back to all the pain she had caused her beautiful M.E. as of late.
Maura quickly notice as Jane's brows furrowed. She knew the reason behind it. She also knew she had to fix it, quickly. "Jane, look at me please." She waited until the detective was looking at her. "Please don't think anymore about the pain we have caused each other. Please. I don't want to dwell on it anymore. And I don't want you to constantly beat yourself up about it. Because if you do we will never move past this. Today is a new day and what a fantastic morning you have made it! The past is behind us. Today is already different, let's move forward. Because Jane, this morning you have made me the happiest I have ever been. Let's focus on that." The honey-blonde gently rubbed Jane's cheek before placing a kiss on her head.
"Ok Maur. But I mean it when I say I am going to spend every day trying to make you as happy as possible."
"That I can live with."
To be continued...