Disclaimer: Naruto may be my baby, but I don't not own him.

Warning: Language, violence and slight gore.

- ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔ -

"What are you wearing?"

Welp. I'm fucked.

So, let me run down what is happening right now.

Here I was, working on the finishing touches of the helmet that I spent so long on when I heard a knock on the door. I thought, 'Well hey. Why not see who it is?' And didn't remember that since it was laundry day I was wearing one of the tee-shirts from my Naruto stash that had Kakashi on it and dumbly opened the door, forgetting about its existence... only to see Kakashi...

Now that you are all caught up, pity me for the situations that I get myself into.

"Um..." Shit. An excuse! What's a good excuse? Ah fuck, blurt something out. "I stalk you." WRONG THING! ABORT MISSION! ABORT!

"...What?"

I'M SUCH A DUMB-ASS! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?! SHIT CAN'T GO BACK NOW! ONLY ADD MORE SHIT TO THE FIRE BECAUSE WHY NOT?!

"I have another shirt of you, a plushie and full body pillow of you! Your ass is hot and I want your babies, you sexy beast!" I confessed before slamming the door in his face. After a second, I opened it again, locked eyes with him and glared, "Forget this conversation ever happened or I will rip out your spine and beat you with it."

His face held pure shock before sighing, "...What conversation?"

"Good boy." Slam.

I never got to know what he wanted that day.

- ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔ -

"Are you all in position?"

"I am."

"So am I"

"As well as I am."

"..."

"Charlotte... is everything okay?"

Deep breathing. "Kakashi..." More breathing. "...I am your father."

"...Stop messing around."

"Hehe... sorry." I giggled. Today, I had finally managed to add a voice changer to the helmet that I'm now wearing. Dude, I love it so much and I'm using it every chance I get. I especially enjoy the higher pitch ones since they're the most fun. I also love that when I wear all baggy black clothes (like now), you can't tell my gender so I end up fucking with so many people.

I still have to make holograms to show up on the glass so I can see in front of me but also the screen. Plus, I added voice recognition (Bitch to code though) and can now toggle on and off the cool voice! I'm working right now on how to fix my blind spots like the back of my head, I might add a camera back there so I could see if anything went wrong. I also have gloves on my hands that have the iron man laser things on them except they don't exactly work as they burn my hands if I use them... have to work on that too. I have to fix that.

Kakashi's voice suddenly pipped up, "The targets on the move!" He shouted. Oh yeah... on a mission. Forgot about that. So, we all sprung from out hidden spots to pounce the target.

- ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔ -

That poor kitty.

We returned Tora to their owner who hugged the kitty so hard that it was trying to claw its way out of the tight grip. Meh, now to wait until Tazuna comes. Now... what do I want to make next? A list formed in my head as too what I should create... and only half of them I could actually work so fuck.

Oh... it seems Naruto had already said that he didn't want to do another D-rank mission and the Hokage was lecturing us about the ranks and blah blah blah, no one is listening. Naruto did his whole 'Kid no more' speech and the Hokage was, 'I feel ya man.' and gave us a C-rank mission.

Enter Tazuna.

Tazuna stumbled in and took a swig of his sake, slurring, "W...what? You're havin' kids protect me?" He looked at all of us with a raised eyebrow. His eyes stopped at me and looked really puzzled at me. Oh yeah, I'm wearing all black and with a helmet that you can't see the mysterious face.

I smirked. "Toggle voice and make pitch changer to deep."

A little beep told me it did as I said and I smiled deviously as I hissed out, "I am death. I will end you." My teammates all face palmed.

Tazuna scoffed but otherwise looked unaffected and just started to introduce himself. "I am Tazuna. I'm a professional bridge builder and I need to make it home safely, so protect me, even if it costs you your lives."

Yeah yeah yeah. We get it.

- ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔ -

"Woohoo! Let's do this! Road Trip!" Naruto yelled.

"Can I really trust this kid with my life?" Tazuna asked Kakashi.

"I'm a jonin. You're safe."

All the talking and all the walking, bleh. I took out my phone out of my bag (the one with my laptop in it as since we are going to be doing this for about a week and we'll have free time, why not code some more?) and mindlessly played around with it before I started to write down all the things and ideas I could create. I ran out of ideas and put my phone away. We ended up just doing everything the manga said would happen. There was the puddle, the fight, Naruto stabbing himself, boat scene where Tazuna explained shit and we were on the road again. Everything is the exact same as it was... it was quite boring expecting everything that was coming. It meant that I had no spontantious adventures or anything... just everything that works out. Damn, I hope I'm not a Mary Sue that everything works out for. I'd totally be pissed.

Now, Naruto was throwing kunai everywhere and be the little dummy he is and almost hit the bunny. People were like, 'Yo. Wassup with all this shit? White bunny? Nahhh, not right.' and queue Zabuza.

"Everyone duck!" Kakashi screamed.

We all crashed to the floor and then Zabuza was like, 'Yo. Imma kill dat dude. That coolio?' and we were like, 'Nah son, that shit ain't fly.' Blah blah. Everything was seeming to go according to the way it originally was, but... once Kakashi got trapped in the water justu thing... everything kind of... fell apart.

What was supposed to happen was that Naruto got kicked, he got scared and faced his fear of battle, then was all like, 'Ay Sasuke, I got me a plan.' and then Sasuke gets kicked and Naruto does the whole clone shit to lead to the whole double shuriken thing... yet, that didn't happen?

What happened this time was that instead of Naruto getting kicked the first time, it was me? I basically flung into a tree behind me and I felt a crack on my left arm as I landed on it. "You fucking whore baby!" I cussed out on instinct because dude, I just broke my arm. Do not ask me why I said that phrase when a simple 'ow' would have sufficed.

Sasuke then got kicked also and lost consciousness and his head started to bleed. Which was defiantly not good as we kinda need him to follow through with the original plan. Naruto was still scared shitless and Sakura was still the only one to really 'protect' (I use the term lightly) Tazuna. My head was reeling as I thought about all of this. What the fuck is going on? This isn't what happened! Well, I know I'm here but that shouldn't really alter anything! I mean they're the main characters, they should end up...

Wait... what am I doing? Here I was, assuming it's all a TV show or comic, but this is actually happening right here, right now and there is a chance that... I could die. Like holy shit, I could die. Everyone here can die. Oh fuck. Why didn't I realize this earlier?! Am I that stupid?! Did I really think I could waltz into a world of death and war and turn out okay? Perfectly unscratched? There is no 'main character' in real life. It's a free for all. I'm not a Mary Sue that has everything working out for them... I'm just me. Not a badass person... just a tech geek who knows how to make cool shit and maybe make some sarcastic input once and a while.

What was I thinking when I was twelve? That I could actually survive in this world? That everything would be peachy and everyone would love me? No... no that isn't how this is working. It's not going to work like that no matter how I look at it. God! What was I assuming...? I'm such an idiot. Both then and now.

I'm going to have to wing this battle... shit. I'm not prepared for this. Not prepared at all. I calmed my nerves down and focus on what was learned by this battle. I know that every fight in this damn show has a theme or meaning that someone learns from... this one I believe is where Naruto gets the nerves to not be a little bitch and to fight or like hey you are going to die. Fuck, that's the main priority since I can't do shit by myself.

"Naruto! Don't just stand there and gape like a little shit! Get your head band back and kick his ass! Why did you stab your hand to promise yourself to never run away from a fight when you're doing that right now?!" I screamed as I stood up from my spot. I slid the helmet off my head and dug through my bag for my glasses as the helmet would just slow me down. Naruto seemed to knock out of it and recollect himself. He charged at Zabuza and got his head band back, starting to do his speech thing. Dear lord, I forgot how melodramatic it was. Once he was done, he turned towards me.

"Do you have a plan?"

Now back to the present to after Naruto and I were whispering to each other and whipped up a plan. (After I found out that Naruto doesn't even have the huge shuriken thing and me basically yelling, "ARE YOU FUCKING WITH ME RIGHT NOW?!") Naruto created a bunch of shadow clones to fight in taijustu the Zabuza clones, or at least distract them. Since I fucking suck at taijustu, I'm not going to aid him. What I am good at is dodging. Like dude, dodging is my absolute shit. So, Naruto distracts while I try and get to the real Zabuza and Tsunade punch him to the ground, all while dodging the other clones he might make after he sees our plan.

And if that doesn't work... Plan B. Which is code name for 'I'm going to do something very very stupid and it could really fuck up my body'. A sigh escaped me as I whispered, "Computer, warm up lasers."

I started to feel a heat on my palms and I nodded to Naruto. He formed the hand signs and yelled, "Shadow Clone Justu!" About ten Narutos popped up beside Clone Zabuza (C.Z. for short) and all bum rushed the C.Z. and piled ontop of him. The C.Z. took out all the Narutos and created about two more of his clones once he saw we were ganging up on him. Naruto made more clones as I ran forwards one of the C.Z.s and he tried to hit me, but I just dodged and weaved out of the way, heading to my original target, the real Zabuza. They all saw this and Naruto was distracting two of the clones so the last one stood in between Zabuza and me.

I ended up dodging his punches and jumped up. My foot connected with his head as I pushed off it and jumped towards Zabuza with a glint in my eye. I reeled my fist back and hoped and prayed that this worked. Zabuza held up his free hand, with the intent to catch my fist, which wouldn't matter if I ended up hitting him since he'll go flying back. Chakra was formed to my fist and I brought it forward to... No. NO. I didn't just do that. NO.

I timed the punch wrong and ended up wasting my chakra as when the fist met his hand, there was little to no force what so ever. Horror flickered onto my face as he caught my fist and kept me stationary. "Heh... nice try. Maybe next time." He mocked. He twisted my right arm in an odd angle and was trying to make it snap to match my other arm as I was grunting in pain. Kakashi was looking horrified when we locked eyes. Well, fuck. Plan B.

I gave Kakashi a smirk and wink as I placed my left palm right in the center of Zabuza's chest. Being pre-occupied with my right arm, he dismissed my left one as a measly attempt to pry myself away from him. I smiled at him wickedly and hissed out, "Next times too far away. Why not now?" Confusion set on his face, bewildered on what I was talking about, before I screamed, "Computer! Left hand! Full force!"

Right as I finished my sentence, my left hand had grown in heat and the computer blasted it with as much juice as it could and I was flown back from where I was with Zabuza.

Pain.

Holy shit. The pure fucking pain.

I screamed as loud as my vocal cords could handle as I tried to clutch my left arm to my chest. I pulled in away for a second to see how bad the damage was for my left hand, but... it wasn't there. All there was, was a bloody stub to my elbow. My vision was blinking in and out and I tried to locate Zabuza to see what I did to him. He got blown back to the middle of the lake and Kakashi was out of the water prison. Zabuza had his chest servilely scorched and it seemed it would defiantly be third degree burns. Kakashi looked back at me for a second, worry in his face, before nodding his head, like he was telling me that my job was done and I could rest now. He then looked back at the battle that was going to happen.

Naruto and Sakura ran over to me and started to freak out once they saw my arm. The amount of blood pooling around me looked like I could bleed out any moment so Naruto took off his jacket and used it as a means to stop the blood from flowing. Sakura was on the verge of tears and she was 'trying' to calm me down (It seemed like she more was trying to reassure herself). My vision was blacking out and I was loosing my hearing too as I could only hear a constant ringing noise. I know I shouldn't pass out when on the verge of dying since I might not wake up, but my eyelids kind of shut on their own. The only thing I could hear now, were my own thoughts. The last thought that passed through my head was...

Welp... that could've gone smoother.

- ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔ -

2, 500 words... dude. Never again. I'm not writing this long ever again. I just need a break. Also, could you see how much I was paraphrasing as if I didn't do that this chapter would be about 5,000 words and I would cry.

And if you couldn't understand what happened, it's that Charlotte knew that if she used the lasers in her gloves, she might get hurt, but she took the chance. She expected it to just burn her, yet it completely back fired, making an explosion that blew off her arm. She knew the risks and she took them, just turns out the risks came true.

Plus, now that you see anything is fair game in this story now, the battles are going to hold a bit of surprises since anything can happen ;) Not all but, some will end up being completely different... possibly... maybe... probably not by much as the outcome with probably be the same, but just the shit that goes down won't be.

The next two chapters are still the Zabuza Arc and then its the start of the chunnin exams which is from chapters 10-16 in all. But, yeah. Shit went down in this one. You all hate me, huh?

Hehe... you're gonna have to wait until Friday before the next update. ;D

See you next chapter!

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