Reindeer.
"It's metaphorical," Spike stated.
"So this Jesus carpenter wasn't really the king of kings?"
"Well, yes and no. You see, it's metaphorical, Sunstreaker."
"So he wasn't literally, the lord of lords?"
"It's metaphorical."
"And will he reign forever and ever? I mean, at most, human life-spans are only just over one hundred of this planet's cycles. And, just to throw a bit of fluid into the electrics, his religious text does say he dies!"
"It's metaphorical."
"The death or the reigning forever and ever part?"
"Well, kind of both, really." Now Sunstreaker was confused.
"And what about Santa Claus? Is he a metaphor too?" Spike harrumphed.
"No!" Sunstreaker's optical ridges shot up – he had been expecting this jolly red man who flew through the sky without wings and fitted down implausible gaps to be a metaphor too. So he really existe- "He's a lie we tell children to make Christmas more magical!" Never mind.
"I see. So this celebration isn't based in reality much, is it?"
"Well, the gifts are plenty real, aren't they?" Sunstreaker smiled at the thought of being given presents by all of the Ark crew. Of course, he would have to give things back, but he still liked the idea of the attention.
"So what about rain-deer; are they metaphors too?"
"Oh no, no. They exist. Good luck finding any locally though," Spike chuckled.
"You know," Carly interrupted, "there was once a Christmas display at the edge of Portland using reindeer. The thing is, the reins came loose and they all made a bid for freedom. Some were caught, but there are tales that you'll find a small herd living wild in Water-Bridge Woods, north-west of Portland. That was about two decades ago – not sure if there are really any there now though." Sunstreaker's interest had been caught: he liked a mystery, especially one so close that he and his brother could investigate. One look outside at the fine rain and the muddy conditions changed his mind though. Ah, they'll be there all year round. I'll see them later. As he moved to scratch his helm he caught sight of a mark in his arm. It was such a big blemish – how had he not spotted it before?
Windcharger watched Sunstreaker turn to go, muttering about some non-existent mark on his right arm. He had heard about the rain-deer and wanted to see some before the human year was out.
"Water-Bridge Woods, you say?" He asked Carly, receiving a voiced affirmative in return. He had passed the place before – he could probably find them, but if he wanted to share this sight with the rest of the Ark, he would need help. He checked the rotas and found that, purely by luck, the mech he wanted was free for the rest of the evening: Trailbreaker. Now it was only a question of finding him.
Windcharger knocked on Trailbreaker's door and had an answer almost immediately.
"Yep?"
"I need your help."
"Yep?"
"I need to find a 'rain-deer'."
"Yep?"
"I need you to come out with me to Water-Bridge Woods and snag one with your force-field for me."
"So… you want me to go out with you into the muddy wet cold to find and bring back an Earth creature?"
"Yep." Trailbreaker scratched his chin.
"Alright – I'll just go get Hound."
"He needs to come?"
"Well, yeah," Trailbreaker shrugged, looking at the minibot as if Hound's necessity was the most obvious thing in the world. "His tracking skills will reduce the time we spend searching for them." Trailbreaker left his room and knocked on the neighbouring door. "Hound! Hound! We've got a special little night trip planned for you!" There was no answer. "I know he's in there," Trailbreaker said to Windcharger. "Hound! Get up you lazy so-and-so!" Windcharger heard a slump and a thud, followed by some scratching noises at the door.
"Ah, wo'choowan'?" Hound asked, optics bleary, and not sounding too friendly but not being outright rude either.
"We're going hunting. Come with us."
"Only if you carry me." Trailbreaker knew that this meant 'no', but instead put on a grin and picked him up.
"Fine. We're going to Water-Bridge Woods. We're after rain-deer."
"Rain-deer?" The tracker muttered. "I want to see some of those." Trailbreaker gave Windcharger the thumbs-up and began walking along the corridor to make their way outside.
More than a half-hour had passed by the time they reached their desired location. Without any leaves on the trees, the woods looked like a very foreboding place. And to be honest, Windcharger could not understand why they needed Hound with them: everything looked so exposed. Hound knelt down and looked at the mud.
"There are tracks here," he said.
"Oh-no, we'd better leave now then!" Trailbreaker said in mock panic. "One Tracks is enough to handle as it is!" The other two mechs smirked at him before Hound continued.
"These tracks are a few days old – we need to find fresher ones. But I think they belong to the creatures you're after." The three Autobots wandered into the woods, Hound in the lead, and after another half an hour, they came to a stop. "We should wait here," Hound whispered. "I think they come to feed here often." The three crouched and settled into comfortable positions and waited. And waited. And waited. "Windcharger… are rain-deer nocturnal or day-time creatures?"
Trailbreaker elbowed Windcharger – he had not realised that his concentration had strolled so much. He looked in front of him and his face-plate lit up with joy: there in front of him was the creature they had been searching for. He had to admit, it looked very majestic, with a lithe body and magnificent antlers. Windcharger nodded to Trailbreaker, who in turn did his part of the task. Held down within an energy-net, the reindeer began to buck and shout but it could not break free.
"Are you sure we should do this? The creature looks traumatised," Hound asked sceptically.
"It'll calm down in a little while – let's just take it to the Ark, show the others and release it," Trailbreaker replied. Windcharger remained silent. "Something wrong, little guy?"
"Well, to be honest, I was expecting it to be more… blue. You know – since it's called a rain-deer an' all and humans associate rain with water and water with the colour blue." Windcharger took out a card showing snowflakes down the side and the outline of a prancing reindeer in the centre. The animal was a light blue against a white background.
"Perhaps the 'rain' part is some kind of metaphor," Hound shrugged. "We'll ask the humans when we get back to the base."
When Sparkplug and Spike began to leave the Ark that evening and make their way back to Portland, they came upon a curious sight in the communications room: the Autobots had gathered around something that was obviously of great interest, and Raoul was sitting on one of the work stations, laughing into collapse.
"Raoul! Raoul – what is it?" Sparkplug asked.
"T-take take," the boy replied in between fits of giggles and short breaths. "Take a look for yaselves!" As they made their way through the forest of legs, they heard snippets of conversation:
"So that's what one looks like in real life! Some of the cards aren't really anatomically accurate, are they?"
"Do they make it rain? Are they only found during rainstorms? Is that how they get their name?"
"Ah thought the li'l critter would be blue!"
"Where'd you find it?"
"I'm not sure that creature should be in here – has it been threat-scanned? Is it healthy? Is it wounded? Is it diseased?" Spike saw it before his father.
"Oh, wow! A real live reindeer!" His father gasped in shock. The creature was obviously startled at the humans and Autobots and really did not know what to do. It tried squirming and bucking but still Trailbreaker's force-field kept it caged.
"Where'd you find that?" Sparkplug asked in astonishment.
"Water-Bridge Woods," Hound replied. "Where Carly told us they might be." He paused a moment. "Sparkplug, aren't rain-deer meant to be blue?" Raoul laughed even harder. "What connection do they have with rain?" Sparkplug paused a long moment to figure out the meaning of Hound's question.
"No! Not 'rain' – rein! R-E-I-N."
"So the name is not a metaphor or anything like that?"
"No! It's just a name!"
"Well, I assumed since most of Christmas is based in myths, legends and metaphors, these creatures would have something special about them too. Can they fly?"
"No! For the last time, it's only a name! Now return the poor thing back where you got it from!"
After making sure that everyone else had got a peek at the reindeer, Hound, Trailbreaker and Windcharger returned it to where it came from.
"Well, that was… an exciting little trip we had," Trailbreaker said as the reindeer bounded off back into the wilderness. "What are we going to do for next year?" Windcharger took a moment to contemplate how he could improve on bringing back a reindeer.
"How about next year, we try for a polar bear?"
End.
A/N: In most (in fact, probably all) fics I've read, Trailbreaker does not appear unless he is with Hound/Mirage. I want to change that. Thing is, they actually need Hound as well in this story. Ha!