wow, it's been HOW long now? I don't even know.

honestly, I haven't done ANYTHING to do with Naruto in the last year or so, so it's small wonder that this never even crossed my mind. I think I finished this chapter half a year ago, but I never ralized it. I just turned on my laptop and was like, "Oh shit, I FINISHED that?! Since when?"

Anyways, I digress. Please don't kill me. And I'm sorry, but I don't know when I'll be able to update this. And if you've read any of my OTHER Naruto fanfictions, I'm telling you right now that you don't even know is just about DEAD. I actually started typing up the next chapter of new life, same fate, so we'll have to see...

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Chapter 3- I'm semi-positive that I'm sure that I know you...

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"PARTYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!" The Akatsuki screamed, running into the village like a band of demons high off the fury what Hell hath! Oh, I feel sorry for the poor, unsuspecting villagers.......

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"Ohhhhhh! Pretty fireworks, Un! Hey Danna! Look at the fireworks! BOOM!" Deidara squealed like a child.

"I'm a little more marveled by your extremely short attention span." Sasori snickered.

"Hey! I do not have a short attention spa----OHHHHH! PRETTY!!!!"

"And there is the proof that the human race evolved from monkeys. Some of us more than others." Sasori sighed, catching sight of some pretty women and deciding to play the part of a cute little kid so he could peek up their skirts. Naughty, naughty Sasori.

And of course, Deidara has failed to notice his being left behind, continuing to stare at the 'boom', as he put it.

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"La, ti da, tida-a-a~" Tobi sang as he skipped merrily along the crowded streets, tripping little old ladies and eating random kittens on his way, well....whatever.

"Shut up you stupid little monkey." Itachi groaned, sick of Tobi's appartent musical inclination.

"Nooooo----OWW!" The goggle wearing Uchiha gracefully landed on his ass.

"Oops. I didn't see you there..." Trailed off the person who he had ran into. This mysteriously unknown person who we mysteriously know because we don't know what his face looks like, and was peering over the top of his mysteriously unknown orange Icha Icha Paradise book. Guess who?

"Kakashi!?" Tobi crossed his eyes.

"Wait. Aren't you--holy Shit!" Kakashi swore. Earning a slap to the face from some randomly bypassing old lady.

"What am I, chopped liver?" Itachi asked pissed off-ly.

"What. the. fuck." Kakashi's jaw dropped under his mask. And this time the little old lady pulled out a bazooka. Run Kakashi, Run!

"I'LL TEACH YOU TO SWEAR IN FRONT OF INNOCENT CHILDREN!!!!" The lady howled, blugeoning the jounin with her purse.

"Mayyybbeee we should be going...." Obitobi said as they ran from the murder scene.

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"Heelllllooooo!?! Anybody?!?" Kisame called, trying to find a familiar face. Yep, you guessed it, he got lost. Poor sap.

The shark child had currently gone through many stores trying to find one of the Akatsuki. Simple places, like McDonalds, where he found himself stuck in the playplace. The Leaky Cauldron, after being chased by possesed clam chowder. A Pokemart, ("I told you, I'm not looking for any Escape Ropes!") The Muffin Man's bakery, Tortuga, (Lord knows how he got there...) took a ride in the Mystery Machine, (Zoinks! A talking fish!) The Strahl, (what's that?! Oh, a Viera?) along with other places that your parents would not approve of me telling you readers.*coughtredlightdistrictscough!*

Looking around, he wandered into a shop. Not just any shop, mind you, but a shop nonetheless. And once inside said shop, he was greeted by a lady with very messy burgundy-red hair, but due to the ghastly lighting of the place, it almost appeared black. She walked over from where she was previously making meat pies.

"Hello there, love. Come in for a pie have you?" the lady asked.

"N-no......" Kisame stuttered.

"Oh...Well, come in anyways, child. I'm ."

Kisame obliged, taking a seat in the dusty shop. He was looking around when suddenly, a crazy man ran into the shop and started singing with . Kisame didn't catch all of the words, but he was pretty sure that they said something about 'little priests' or, 'Serving anyone to anyone.' Suddenly he got the feeling that he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Yep, definitely, now that the crazy man turned to face him, evil look on his face. Who the hell has a white streak in their hair!?

"Who is that?" The man asked, gesturing to Kisame.

answered, "Just some young lad who come wanderin' in here. He ain't no harm, Mr.T."

"Send 'im up." He snapped. The pie lady looked at a loss for words.

"Uhhhhh, mayyybe I should jut be going...." Kisame stressed his words, edging toward the door.

The man pulled a silver razer out of his pocket, "Now now, boy. Why don't you just come with your good friend Sweeny Todd?"

"HOLY SHIT!" Kisame turned tail and ran like his life depended on it. Which it does.

Behind him, he could hear Sweeny chasing him and singing, "There's a hole in the world like a great black pit and it's filled with people who are filled with shit and the vermin of the world inhabit it~ But not for long!"

And this only succeeded in making the ex-kirinin run faster. A lot faster. He'd probably have been clocking 60mph if one were to flag , he ran and ran, ignoring the protests of unimportant strangers and some young man's protests that he must help him rescue Johanna.......yeah.

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"Goddamnit, you'd think these people had never seen a kid with a plant on his head before!" Zetsu's black side exclaimed, as the crowd around them parted to either side to let the oddly equipped boy pass.

"I'd doubt if they have." His white half replied. only serving to attract more questioning and disbelieving stares.

"Well, they don't have to be so freaking blatant about it!"

"They can't help it."

"They'd better start 'helping it' or I'll help them, myself!" He raised a fist at a group of children who were pointing and whispering about them.

"I'm not sure that's a--" White was cut off.

"OI! Do you want me to shove a kunai up your ass!?! No, I didn't think so! That's right, you walk away, old man, walk away!" Black screeched at some poor old guy.

"Maybe we should just find Leader-Sama....Before you eat someone." White advised, half dragging the protesting right half of their body.

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"Pein-sama, don't you want any dango?" Konan asked, offering a stick to the annoyed brunet, who denied with a shake of his head.

"Konan! Nagato!" Yahiko screeched happily, jumping up and down in front of a shop that was selling faux ANBU masks, and the blonde was obviously intent on buying one.

"Yes?" Pein sighed, once again cursing whatever made his ex-teammate return to life.

"let's each get masks! Please!? Pleeeaaaasssseeeee????" The blond whined, clasping his hands in a begging fashion.

"Now, I dont thi---" Pein was cut off by his sister,

"Of course, Yahiko-kun." The blue-haired girl smiled, giving the leader of the Akatsuki a double meaning in it, 'Cooperate. He's been dead for hell knows how long. Play along'.

the feared leader was only able to sigh in exasperation and slip the fake mask oner his head. Oh well, at least it'd serve to stop anyone from recognizing him. As unlikely as that was, though there was still a chance that Jiraiya was still hanging aroung the village...

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AND THEN SUDDENLY, AS IN COMPLETELY UNEXPECTEDLY, TOTALLY OUT OF THE BLUE...

...A scream rang through the village of Konohagakure, followed by a round of riduculously loud laughing and cussing.

My my, What has Hidan done now?

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Do you hate me now? You should. I'm really sorry for the slow update, and even more sorry to report that I'm not sure when I'll be able to update again. Sorry! Hate me, flame me, but read my stories anyway!

The update button is now that lavender block right in the center of the page, now! It beckons you!