Nobody's Fault But Mine

Chapter 5 - Warm Safe Place

Peyton lifted her head as she heard the steps echoing along the quiet still hallway. She turned to see Lucas Scott. She rose to her feet, her legs stiff and aching from sitting for so long. She offered a weak uncertain smile as he approached her.

"Hi," she said. "Long night? I was beginning to think you weren't going to show."

"Yeah. How long have you been sitting here?" Lucas asked.

"Since about," she checked her watch, "since six and a half hours ago. I didn't want to go home and I thought maybe we could talk."

Lucas didn't respond, he was still watching her, probably surprised and confused as to why she was here at this time of night.

"I just really needed to feel safe tonight," she explained. "But you can tell me to go if you want."

He smiled gently, "as if I could send you away. Come on." He opened his door, "after you." He took her coat and offered her a seat on his couch. Peyton sat, tucking her legs under her body.

Lucas set down his trusty glock and police bag and then shrugged off his own coat. He then disappeared into the kitchen to make them both coffee.

Peyton took the in his apartment. Papers and files strewn on the coffee table, desk and every other available surface. His numerous bookcases full of books on Criminology, Law, and Criminal Psychology.

"Here," he said handing her a mug of steaming hot coffee. "What happened to your hand?" he asked noticing her bandaged wrist.

Peyton looked down "I fell," she offered as way of an explanation. She immediately pulled her sleeve down to cover the bandage as if removing it from his sight would also remove it from his mind. He must see cases of abuse all the time and he'd know all the signs. Lucas would know she was lying and she cursed herself inwardly for her reaction that just screamed that something was wrong. He however didn't push her any further. Peyton was grateful for that at least.

Lucas sat down beside her sipping his coffee. Peyton choked back a sob breaking the silence between them. He looked at her his eyes clouding with concern.

"Talk to me Peyton. Did something happen" he crouched down in front of her, taking her hands in his. "You can trust me."

"My mom and dad were killed in a car crash ten years ago tonight." She heard her own voice, small and desperate. She couldn't hold it in any longer. She choked out her words despite the emotions they caused. "We were driving home from a family dinner. My dad was driving. He took his eyes off the road for just a second. He ran our car straight into a truck."

"Peyton," Lucas started but Peyton waved him off. She had to say it. It hurt to retell the story and if she was going to she was going to tell it as quickly as she could.

"The truck driver pulled me from the wreckage. He wanted to go back for my mom and dad, but the car went up in flames before he could go back. I can still see them. I screamed and tried to run back to the wreck. The truck driver held me back.

"I was twelve years old. I'd had my birthday just five days before. My bracelet, my dad gave me that for my birthday. It was the last thing he gave me before he died. I wish that driver hadn't pulled me from the car. I wish I'd died along with my family. I miss them so much. It hurts so much."

Lucas wrapped his arms around Peyton's trembling form. Her crying becoming more and more uncontrollable. He stroked her back gently trying to comfort her. Her hot tears soaked through his shirt. She clung to him helplessly.

"Its ok," Lucas told her though nothing could be further from the truth. "Ssh, its ok."

After awhile Peyton calmed down, her body not shaking so violently. She shifted her position, sitting on the floor with him and rested her head against his chest. Lucas stroked her hair.

"I'm so sorry Peyton," Lucas said.

"Me too," she let out a sigh. She wiped away her tears. "God, I just want it to stop hurting. I want to remember them for who they were, but it still just hurts."

Lucas kissed the crown of her head gently, "I know." He held her tighter wanting so desperately to shield her from the pain.

"Talk to me. Tell me about your family," she said as she stood and crossed to the mantel above his fireplace. She looked at the photos he had. She picked up one of a little blonde haired boy. Lucas followed behind her.

"That's my nephew Jamie."

"He's gorgeous," she said smiling at Jamie's wide toothed grin. "Looks mischievous."

"Yeah, he is. He's five now. He's so smart and mature for his age. He's going to be a basketball star just like my brother Nathan. That's Nathan there with his wife Haley. They got married in high school. Which was kind of a big shock in my town. Everyone thought they were way too young and would never make the marriage work. But they did. Despite all the odds they made it."

Peyton smiled at the young teenaged couple as they held each other on their wedding day, smiles frozen in time. Hope and happiness preserved as they prepared to make a new life together.

"Kind of makes you want to believe in happy endings," she said turning to the photograph of the perky brunette and a slightly younger Lucas himself.

"And that would be my soon to be ex wife Brooke."

Peyton turned to look at him.

"I met Brooke in college. I was shy, not really interested in girls or dating. I just wanted to study and get on with my life. Brooke was fun and sexy and we started dating. I asked her to marry me right after I graduated. But I guess it wasn't really meant to be between us. I put a lot into my career and not enough into my marriage. Brooke didn't really get it."

"I'm sorry," Peyton offered.

Lucas offered a sad smile, and then turned his attention to another photograph. "And this is my mom Karen," he handed her a frame of a dark haired woman with kind eyes with a little baby cradled in her arms. " And my baby sister Lily. That was taken the day that Lily was born. She's seven now. They live back home in Tree Hill."

"What about your dad?" Peyton asked. "Can I see a picture of him?"

Lucas frowned, "my dad's not really in the picture."

Peyton nodded her head. She didn't ask any further. She knew what it was like to need to keep secrets in order to protect yourself and the look of hurt that Lucas wore now told her that particular subject was painful.

A moment of quiet reflection filled the silence between them. Lucas glanced once again at her broken wrist, confirming to her that he knew she was being hurt and protecting the person responsible.

"Well its getting pretty late," he said after a beat. "And I've got to be up early in the morning. We should probably get some sleep. You can take the bed.'

"No," Peyton said. " I couldn't. You take it. I'll be fine on the couch. Really."

"No I must insist. My mom raised a gentleman."

"Well in that case, ok."

Lucas gathered some pillows and blankets from the cupboard to make a bed for himself on the couch. He also handed her one of his sweatshirts so she wouldn't have to sleep in her own clothes.

He watched as Peyton made her way into his room.

"Good night Lucas."

"Good night Peyton."

-- --

Lucas awoke the next morning feeling groggy and exhausted. Lucas's sleep had been fitful. His head had whirled from the new murder case and Peyton's revelation. He had tossed and turned for most of the night, unable to shut down his mind.

He sat up, his neck and back stiff from sleeping on the couch. He heard Peyton moving around in his kitchen and smelling the teasingly mouth watering smell of bacon and sausage he went to investigate.

"Morning," he yawned rubbing the tight muscles in his shoulder.

"Morning."

"What is all this," he said taking in the elaborate breakfast spread she had laid out on the table.

"I wanted to say thank you for being so good to me last night. But I didn't know what you liked, so I got pretty much everything. There's pancakes, muffins, croissants, bacon, cereal, fresh fruits."

He grinned at her sweet gesture. "You really didn't have to do this."

"Yeah I did. You took care of me last night. So this is my way of saying thank you. And anyways you didn't have any food in your apartment. I'm thinking you're really in need of a good woman. And I couldn't sleep so......." she trailed off her rambling, blushing slightly. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Because you are adorable," he said.

"Oh," she only blushed harder. She turned back to the bacon sizzling in the frying pan hiding her shyness behind her mass of curls. "Why don't you take a shower whilst I finish up."

"Ok."

Lucas took a quick shower, towelled himself dry and dressed work. A knock at the front door sounded and Lucas went to answer it. Peyton however beat him to the punch to reveal Brooke at the entrance.

Brooke eyes narrowed as she saw Peyton. Lucas had to admit the scene did look pretty bad with Peyton dressed in one of his sweatshirts and shorts. Brooke folded her arms across her chest. "Can I talk to my husband please," she hissed.

"Sure," Peyton said making a hasty exit.

Brooke shot daggers at Lucas "Ok and Haley told me all you ever did now a days is bury yourself in work. Obviously she has no idea. Who is the gazelle anyway?" she demanded.

"She's a friend Brooke. She needed someone. Anyway why do you care?" he asked matching her anger. "You were the one cheating on me whilst we were still together."

"Yeah because you were always working," Brooke then threw up her hands. "You know what I only came round to make sure you were ok before I went back to L.A. I didn't expect to find you with some leggy blonde. Nathan and Haley were both really worried about you after you left so quickly last night. And so was I, but clearly you're doing just fine."

"I don't have to explain myself to you Brooke," he said bitterly. "You were the one who left me remember."

She scowled at him. "You're right. Screw whomever you want. See if I care. I'm leaving. Expect the divorce papers in the mail." Brooke turned on her heel and exited quickly.

Lucas exhaled loudly. That wasn't really the way that he had wanted to start his day.

"I'm so sorry," Peyton said looking up from where she sat at the breakfast table a cup of coffee cradled in her hands.

Lucas shook off her apology, "that really wasn't your fault."

"You want some breakfast?"

"Yeah," Lucas said helping himself to eggs, bacon and toast. His stomach was raging after not having a proper meal in over 24 hours. He ate quickly, ravenous, barely swallowing his food between bites.

"You ok?" he asked as she stared quietly down at her coffee mug.

She nodded meekly, "yeah just tired. I didn't really sleep."

"You're more than welcome to say here and sleep," Lucas still hadn't figured what was truly going on with her and knew at least if she was in his apartment she was safe from whatever scared her.

"Thank you," she replied.

Lucas glanced at his watch noticing he was slightly late, "well I've got to get going. Thanks again for breakfast."

He hurried out the door hoping that she'd take him up on his offer and wouldn't have left by the time he returned.

Author's Notes - Thanks again for your reviews. I hope you enjoyed the latest chapter. Bye for now.