I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT OR ANY OTHER BOOK IN THE SAGA IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM

EPOV

If I thought that Bella filled up with that "Blue Sludge" was frightening, it was nothing compared to how I felt now.

I don't know what I thought Bella would be like in an intoxicated state, but I know I didn't expect this. She wasn't one those "crying into your beer because everything is wrong with you and your life" types. I don't think I would be able to handle that. No, Bella being Bella had to be one of those outgoing let's jump on a table and dance while singing an off-tune Britney Spears song" types.

Which is exactly what she is now doing.

Did I mention that this is happening on her own kitchen table? Or more importantly that it's not just me leaning on the kitchen counter watching this happen but that Emmett and Charlie were here too?

The surprising thing is that Charlie didn't even care. But that might be because he didn't know that Bella was drunk. He just thought that she was on another one of her "extreme sugar rushes", which is apparently what used to happen on a regular bases with her old friends in Phoenix.

I was learning a lot more about my Bella these days.

Bella's singing had been going on for hours now. It's already pretty early in the morning now. I can tell (and everyone in the neighborhood for that matter) that Bella used to be a huge Britney Spears fan since I've lost count of how many songs she's sung but she hasn't gotten a lyric wrong yet. Of course I wouldn't really know anything about that.

After I had gotten Bella away from Emmett and Jasper in the yard outside of our house, I brought her up to my room hoping that she hadn't had enough alcohol to actually get drunk. She looked tired so I laid her in my bed while I went downstairs to go give the two things I call brothers a talking to.... coughbeatingcough.

It was a huge mistake to leave Bella alone.

While I was downstairs "talking" to Emmett, Jasper had snuck up and given Bella more alcohol. I wasn't really surprised with Jasper's actions. What surprised me is that he didn't even have to get her to force drink it. Bella actually wanted more alcohol and drank it herself. According to Jasper she even thanked him.

After I was done with Emmett and was looking for Jasper, Bella came running down the stairs. Apparently alcohol made her more coordinated and less clumsy because she didn't even trip once.

That was when Carlisle arrived.

Bella just stared at him like he was some shiny new toy. I saw that Carlisle was getting a little uncomfortable under Bella's intense stare so I picked her up so that I could drive her back to her house since Charlie wasn't supposed to be home from work until early morning.

But as I started to carry her out the door Bella screamed, and I quote "NO! DON'T TAKE ME AWAY FROM THAT SMEXY HOT PIECE OF ASS EDWARD!"

I just continued carrying her out the door and past a stunned Carlisle.

Bella continued yelling things like "I WOULD TRADE EDWARD FOR YOU ANYDAY DR. MCDREAMY!" and "OH COME ON EDWARD! YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS THAT YOU DON'T HAVE A BOD AS HOT AS THAT! YOU COULD ROAST MARSHMELLOWS OFF OF HIS ABS THEY'RE SO HOT!"

Way to hurt a guy's ego.

I got Emmett to come with me and hold down my screaming love as I drove to her house. I had to keep glaring at him because he wouldn't stop laughing.

When we got to Bella's house, Charlie was in the living room because he had got off work early. Bella ran into the kitchen and here we are now.

Suddenly Bella jumped off of the table and ran straight to the bathroom. We all just stayed where we were not sure if we wanted to know what she was going to do in there.

When I heard Bella throwing up, I pushed myself off the counter and ran at human speed straight to the bathroom and held her hair while rubbing her back. What she was doing didn't look pleasant to say the least.

Hopefully this would keep her from repeating the mistake of getting drunk even though it was really her fault. I defiantly going to have to get Emmett and Jasper back for this, but all I can think of right now until she is back to full health.

After she was done, Emmett and I left while she was having a shower letting Charlie think that I had gone back to my house.

When she finally came into her room almost completely sober, she fell asleep in my arms.

This is defiantly not an experience I want to repeat.

I think that this is the end for this story. I might write a one shot of what Charlie did to Mike or of how Edward will get back at Jasper and Emmett but for now... see ya & thanks for reading!