A/N: The third chapter is here! It's a little longer this time because I thought that it's about time the Weasley twins start to act more like themselves. Enjoy and please, review!

Disclaimer: All the Weasleys are not mine, but the plot for the chapter is.

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Trouble is brewing; What are the twins doing?

To cause mischief and mayhem this time?

For at a year old; The truth is foretold

At what the future will hold

-----

June 26th, 1979

"Mum! I can't find my toy dragon anywhere!" Charlie Weasley yelled down the staircase.

"Have you checked the wash? Anything that was in your pockets should be in the basket!" his mum yelled back.

"It isn't there! Can you help me find it?"

Amidst the clang of pots and pans from the kitchen Molly replied, "I'm busy. I'll help you later, okay, sweetie?"

Charlie grunted in response. "I bet those two have got it."

Molly's head popped out from around the kitchen doorway. "Don't you go and blame your brothers for your carelessness!"

"I ain't blaming them!" Charlie replied, "They're always taking my stuff! I bet they've got it and I want it back!"

Molly sighed, knowing full well that Charlie was probably right. Even as infants, the true colours of the Weasley twins were starting to show. Although their late-night crying happened less and less, there were still signs of what was yet to come. At four months Fred and George stuck anything near them in their mouths, including Percy's favourite picture book. At six months they discovered their hands. They had great fun feeling things, holding things, and smacking their older brothers whenever they came near.

But now, two months after their first birthday, they weren't speaking. Usually babies began to say simple words at nine to twelve months, but Fred and George still hadn't said a thing. This worried Molly greatly, but the boys saw this as a blessing.

"You go check their room when they're finished napping. I'm sure it's around the house somewhere." She gave him a comforting smile and went back to her cooking. Arthur would be home soon, early for the first time in weeks, and she wanted to make him a special dinner.

She was sampling the stew when a crash and loud cries rang from upstairs. The twins were awake.

She marched out of the kitchen and yelled, "Charlie Weasley! I told you to check after they're done napping!"

"Geez, mum, I'm right here." Charlie said from the couch.

Molly blinked at him, shocked. "But then who's up there…?"

Another crash echoed through the house and Bill's voice screaming, "BLOODY HELL, HE'S GOT MY FINGER!"

Rushing up the stairs with Charlie at her heels, Molly burst into her youngest sons' room. Bill was standing at the center of the room, a quivering Percy clinging to his leg. Fred and George were both still in their cribs wide awake. George was crying loudly and Fred had Bill's finger trapped in his mouth.

"What is the meaning of this?" Molly boomed, "Why are you in their room? I finally got them down for a nap and now you've woken them up! Explain yourselves!"

Bill cowered back. As he tried to free his finger from Fred he responded, "It's because of Percy. He came up to me and asked me to come with him here!" He pulled his hand towards him but Fred would not let go.

"I wanted my book back!" Percy spoke loudly over George's crying, "But I was too little to get it, so I asked Bill."

"I thought that if I was really quiet and careful, I could come in and walk out. But this one," Bill glared at the brother on his leg, "dropped the book on one of their toys which woke them up."

Molly placed her hands to her hips and frowned at the two. "And why does Freddie have your finger in his mouth?"

Bill tried to free his finger once more. "Well, you see, the noise woke them up and they started crying. So, to make them stop, I--"

"He put his finger on Fred's mouth to say 'shh' and he bit it!" Percy interrupted, giggling.

"Oh, keep quiet!" Bill snapped. "It actually hurts! I think his teeth are coming in. And stop laughing!" he directed that last statement to Charlie, who was doubled over in laughter.

"For goodness sake," Molly walked over to the crib and patted Fred's hair. "Let go of Bill's finger, now sweetie. It's all right, mummy is right here. Just open your mouth."

Fred finally released Bill's finger, which he had drool and saliva all over it. "Ugh! Nasty! It's got baby germs all over it!"

He fell silent when Molly gave him a stern look. She hurried to the still wailing George and picked him up. "Shh, mummy's here. It's alright, they were just your brothers." She cooed. George quieted down to sniffling and hiccups as he was placed next to Fred.

Once the twins were calm she turned on the two boys, the soft look gone from her eyes. "As punishment for waking up your brothers, you will both have to take care of them when I have Mrs. Simmons over for tea tomorrow. That means feeding them, changing their diapers, and putting them down for their nap."

The room erupted with noise once more as Bill and Percy complained loudly about their punishment and Charlie's laughter.

"But mummy! I can't reach the changing table and I don't wanna!" Percy whined.

"But he's two years old! It's like I'd be taking care of three babies!" Bill reasoned.

"Hey!" Percy cried, "I'm two and a half!"

But Molly was firm. "You two are taking care of them and that's that! It'll teach you responsibility. Besides, who fed them coffee ice cream before their nap time?" Percy blushed and looked at his feet. "It won't be that hard. You two just need to feed them and get them to sleep."

"Now come down stairs for a bit of a snack." She scooped up Fred and George and left an irritable Bill, sad-faced Percy and laughing Charlie.

"Aha ha! You two will have to – ha ha – take care of the babies – he he – oh boy, you are in for it!" Charlie gasped between fits of laughter.

Bill, his pride bruised by his younger brother getting out of this punishment, leaned in close and said, "I heard you were looking for that toy dragon of yours?"

Charlie abruptly stopped laughing. "Oh no…"

Bill slowly made his way to the door. He paused at the door frame and said, "You may want to look under George's crib. I reckon that he was playing with it before putting it away in his 'pocket'." Smiling mischievously, he exited the room.

Charlie stood there open-mouthed for a minute before diving under the crib. Percy stood behind him and crinkled his nose when Charlie extracted a small, poo-encrusted toy dragon. "George…"

-----

"Oh, and don't forget that Fred prefers the apple flavour and George likes pumpkin. Make sure they finish all of their food before you hand them the bottle. And for goodness sake, if they spit up clean it up! They're your own flesh and blood!"

Molly placed her tea set down on the living room table and ignored Bill rolling his eyes. She had just finished giving Bill and Percy their instructions on how to take care of the twins while she was having tea with her friend. Needless to say, they were less than thrilled.

"Yeah, yeah. We've got it, mum." Bill said. "I'll take care of it."

Percy puffed out his thin chest and grinned up at his mum. "I'll take care of it, too mummy! I'll make sure that they eat and sleep and don't make any trouble!"

Molly smiled at him and patted his hair affectionately. "Thank you, dear. I'm sure you'll do a good job, t--" someone knocked on the door and Molly jumped, "oh, she's here already! Well, off you two go!"

Muttering to himself, Bill headed to the bedroom with Percy in a tow. "I can't believe we've got to take care of them. It'll be like taking care of two baby monkeys! This isn't punishment, this is child labor."

They entered the room and found the twins in one crib playing with their building blocks. Bill strode over to them, picked one up and handed him to Percy. "Here, you can take this one." He said, picking up the other.

"Who's this?" Percy asked, holding the baby up by its armpits.

"I'm pretty sure that one's George." Bill answered. "And don't hold him like that!"

He led the way down the stairs, past the giggling women and into the kitchen. Sitting at the table was Charlie, a smirk on his face.

"Lunch time?" he asked.

Bill replied, "I'm supposed to look after the twins, not you, too."

"Hey!" Percy said indignantly, "We're 'apposed to take care of 'em."

"How could I forget?" Bill gently placed Fred on his high chair and took George from Percy.

"Ah, mum left us some sandwiches anyway," Charlie said. "She also left this for you two." He nodded to a thick book on the counter. Percy practically ran to it in excitement.

"What's it say?" he asked, squinting at the cover. Bill looked over his shoulder at the book. The original title (Babysitting Instructions) was crossed out and below it was written in scratchy writing: How to Properly Care for your Twin Brothers and Live to Tell the Tale.

Bill glared at his brother. "Nice, very funny." He nudged the book to the side and searched the cupboards for food.

"I wanna know what it says!" Percy cried out, upset that he had been ignored.

"I'll tell you," Bill handed Percy two plastic bowls, "after we feed them. You want to show mummy how good a helper you are, right?"

Percy lit up and nodded excitedly. "Yeah! I'm gonna make mummy proud and do a really, really good job!"

"It'll be harder than it looks." Warned Bill.

"But I'll do a good job! I'm ready!" Percy replied while setting the bowls in front of the twins.

Alas, no one could ever truly be ready for Fred and George. The minute the food was set in front of them mashed turnips and carrots were flying all over the place. Bill bravely snatched the spoon from George and tried to feed him. This worked for a bit until Fred hit him in the eye with his own spoon.

After finally getting enough food in their mouths and cleaning up the kitchen all they had left to do was put them to bed. But just as Bill was placing Fred into his crib ("They'll fall asleep, and it'll all be over.") a foul smell crept into the air.

"Ugh!" Bill exclaimed. "What is that smell?"

"Wasn't me!" Percy said at once.

Bill frowned. He had a feeling he knew where it was coming from, but he was hoping… He held Fred up to him and cautiously took a whiff. "Ack! It is him!"

"Ewwwww! George smells bad, too!" Percy held the baby away from himself.

Charlie chose that moment to stride past the room. "Hey, how's it going so fa—oh, gross! What's that smell?"

He took one look at the cringing Bill and Percy holding George away and broke out laughing. "Ahaha! They pooped! And not just one, but both! This must be a gift from Merlin!"

"Oh, shut up, Charlie!" Bill snapped. "C'mon, Perce, we've gotta change them."

Percy looked at his oldest brother with wide, shocked eyes. "No, I don't want to! I'm too…uh…little!"

"You weren't too little to 'read' Hogwarts, a History." Bill scoffed. "So you aren't too little to help me with this."

Whimpering, Percy ambled over to the changing table where Bill had already lay Fred on. They sucked in a deep breath and removed the diaper. The stench was terrible, smelling of mouldy cheese and simply plain crap that made their eyes water. Even Charlie, all the way out in the hall, was feeling a little nauseated.

"Gyak! Merlin's tightest robes, that smell is unbelievable!" Bill gagged.

"Change 'im, change 'im fast!" said Percy while pinching his nose.

Bill hurriedly chucked the diaper in the garbage and Percy fumbled with the powder and wipes before handing them to him. After that he was handed a clean diaper and put it on tight. They were finally able to breathe in. The boys took a great gulp of air before gagging again.

"I can still smell it!" cried Percy.

Bill carried Fred back to the crib and picked up a crying George. "Yeah, because this one's still got some turd in his diaper. C'mon."

They took another deep breath and removed the diaper. The same foul stench filled the air. This time Percy was ready with the equipment. Before long George was powdered and wiped clean. "Just the diaper, then!" Bill said excitedly. Percy handed him a clean diaper but just before he got it on George…

"AAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!"

Downstairs, Molly and Mrs. Simmons jumped out of their seats. "What in heaven's name…"

Molly sighed. "That's my oldest, Bill, yelling. Excuse me, but I've got to go and see what's going on."

Inside the nursery Bill was screaming and running back and forth frantically. Charlie, who had stayed just by the door, was on the ground rolling around laughing. And little Percy was standing well away from his brothers and the changing table.

"That little brat!" Bill was screaming. "I can't believe it! After I took the diaper off and finished cleaning him! He had the nerve to pee on me!"

"Some of it hit me, too!" Percy wailed.

"Are you kidding me? Who was the one standing right in his line of fire? And you!" he glared at his laughing brother "This isn't funny!"

"There's still…hahahaha…some on your…ahahahaha….sh-shirt!" Charlie laughed.

"Shut up!" Bill turned to look at George, still naked and giggling on the changing table. "I can't believe you did this! After all I did for you, you ungrateful little--"

"William Arthur Weasley!" came Molly from the doorway. "Complete that sentence and you can spend the rest of your summer de-gnoming the garden!"

"Sorry mum, but look!" he pointed to his wet shirt. "He peed on me!"

Walking over to the changing table, Molly replied, "He's just a baby! It's not like he did on purpose, anyway!"

"Are you kidding me? Of course he did! That kid has good aim!" Bill said.

Molly looked at him angrily. "William! You will not blame your baby brothers for anything! You are the eldest and should be a better role-model!"

"Mum, you can't honestly expect me to keep my cool when I get freakin' peed on!"

Giving him her most terrifying look, she yelled "Young man, I expect you to use decent language not only around all your younger brothers but towards everyone you meet! I wouldn't be surprised if the young ones picked up on your habit!"

"I don't use bad words…" Percy muttered from the corner.

"Of course you don't, sweetie." Molly smiled warmly at him. "But the twins are still very young! They haven't even spoken yet!"

Bill groaned. "I don't think their first words will be 'bloody hell'."

"It just very well may be!"

While they were bickering, Fred and George (who was back in the crib with his brother) sat quietly, listening. It was true, that neither had spoken yet. It was true that they were usually around for Bill's potty mouth or the occasional swear heard on the radio. In fact, it was not uncommon for them to hear at least one piece of foul language a week.

But of course, that's not all they hear.

So while their mother and brother were arguing, Fred and George listened carefully and watched their lips move, forming every word.

"Only nine years old and the language you use!"

"I don't swear that much! Besides, it's only when I'm really angry!"

"Around the twins!"

"It isn't that bad! I could say worse things."

"You had better not, Bill, or you will be severely punished."

"I won't! I don't even use 'bad language' around the twins that often anyway."

"I'd prefer you stop using it all together, not only away from those two!"

"Twins!"

"Yes, the twins!"

"What? I didn't say anything."

"But of course you--" Molly paused mid-sentence. Her eyes widened, the gears grinding in her head. Everyone else in the room, even Charlie and Mrs. Simmons in the hallway, stopped moving. Then slowly, all at once, they turned their heads to the crib.

Fred and George stared back at them all, grinning like two little boys who have just discovered something great. Fred opened his mouth again.

"Twins!"

Molly gasped. She wobbled over to the crib and reached in to pull him out. She looked her son directly in the eye and said "Did you just speak, honey?" Fred grinned toothlessly back at her.

Bill walked over and looked at George. He poked him in the nose and asked him "Do you have anything to say, little man?"

George gave him a smile identical to his brother's. He reached his arms up to him and, just like his brother, opened his mouth wide.

"Two!"

Mrs. Simmons entered the room to pat her friend's back. Molly's eyes filled with tears. "Twins and two!" she murmured. "What a thing for them to say!"

"Two! Two! Two!" George gurgled in Bill's arms.

"They're twin words." Percy looked at his younger brothers with awe.

Molly smiled. "That's right, twin words. Special words for special boys."

As everything had a warm and cozy feel, Charlie fell to his knees and groaned. "No! Now that they can talk, they'll never shut up!"

How right he was.