Still borrowing Goren and Eames

"Why only mostly?"

Alex stood up straight and went over and sat down in the other chair. A small round table with the coffeemaker was between them. She poured herself a cup of coffee as she thought about how best to explain it to him.

"OK look, I forgave you for taking the undercover assignment without telling me. I still don't like it but I guess I understand it and forgave you. The ones I haven't forgiven for it are Ross and the Chief."

"So I don't understand the problem."

"I'm not done yet."

"OK sorry, please continue."

"What I haven't forgiven you for yet is for being at the other end of my gun when the bust went down. You know I was on the case and you knew we were coming in. You should have given me a heads up."

"Eames, you know I was under orders not to."

"Yeah! Orders from who Bobby? HUH? The Chief of D's? We both know that he was probably hoping I would shoot you. Did you think of that? For that matter, that were a lot of uniforms there and not all of them knew you. What if one of those that didn't saw your gun pointing at me and shot you?"

"We both know that I can't go back and change it. So if we don't let it go, how are we going to get out partnership back to where it used to be?"

"I didn't say I wouldn't let it go, but, I likely won't forgive that part until I stop having nightmares about it."

Bobby reached over and took hold of her hand. "I didn't know you were having nightmares. How often? Are you seeing Dr Olivet about it? Did it bring back memories of Joe and how he died on the job? Not that I 'm your husband or anything but we're partners and that can be just as close, just without the sex."

Alex threw up her hands to stop him. He had to bring up sex. Here she was trying not to think the words sex and Bobby in the same sentence. The temptation was just too strong. Besides he brought Joe into the argument and that is so way out in left field she had to reel him in. She jumped up and paced over to the other side of the room before turning and replying to his rant of questions.

"Let's leave Joe out of it. There is not an ounce of similarity to Joe's death and your near death at my hand."

"No, of course your right." Bobby knew there was no similarity between him and Joe. Joe had been her husband whom she loved. HIM, he was just her partner who had treated her badly for the last couple of years. Just because he wished it could be more didn't mean she did.

"Bobby"

"No, your right, I'm sorry but what about the rest. If you haven't gotten help, you should."

"Great advice from the king of 'BACK OFF', but to answer your questions. As to how often; every night and yes I have been to see Olivet for all the good it did."

"What did she say?"

"That I need to forgive you and they should stop."

"She's pretty smart and good at her job so she is probably right."

"Yeah well, some people think I'm pretty smart too and I think that I'll forgive you when they stop."

"Now you're just being difficult."

"Guess more of you is rubbing off on me then."

"OK, you win, I give up." Bobby stood and reached for his bag. "I'm going to take my shower."

"Bobby, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that."

"No, you were just being honest but a thought occurs, you didn't have one last night." With that Bobby shut the door.

"Damn," Alex muttered. She had hoped he hadn't notice the lack of nightmare last night. She had thought about it in the shower and came to the conclusion that having him so close reassured her subconscious. Bobby was alive and she hadn't killed him, like she does every other night in her dreams. Alex had meant it when she said there was no similarity between Bobby and Joe. It had hurt badly when Joe died and then again when it came out that he wasn't the man she thought he was. But Bobby dying? It just about killed her to think about that possibility. She had indeed loved Joe or she wouldn't have married him, but even at its best, it paled next to her love for Bobby. That's why she had nightmares. Every night her gun kicked in her hand as she shot and killed her soul mate.

While Bobby was in the shower, he tried to calm down. Hell, he had nightmares too. Not every night like she did, but often enough to never let him forget how he almost lost Alex when Jo Gage had kidnapped her. She didn't realize it, but, that was one of the main reasons he had adhered strictly to orders about telling her what he was doing undercover. If those slime balls had seen how important she is to him, they could have used her to control him and they could have hurt her or worse. He wasn't going to think about the worse, because it made him crazy when he did.

Next chapter they take a break for fun