"I don't get it!" Demyx cried, flopping himself down on the couch oversized to the point it was more like a bed.
Lexaeus, who was currently dominating an armchair so massive it made him look normal, did not look up from his book. In fact, he made no motion whatsoever.
"I mean seriously, why is Axel so popular? He's a pyromanic freak who can be described by one of several nasty words at any given time. He's the kind of guy who would sleep with you for kicks, then move on the next day and expect nothing to change!"
Lexaeus, used to these outbursts, calmly continued reading.
"What's the matter with Demyx, huh? I'm cute! And yes, while the haircut may have been an unfortunate accident, it just goes to show you what happens when you push Zexion too far, right? I'm a musician! People like musicians, right? I've got a fun, lovable personality, and people who meet me generally like me!"
Lexaeus punctuated his answer to these statements by turning a page.
"I wonder if erosion has anything to do with it."
Lexaeus, who may or may not have been mildly confused as to whether Demyx was talking about people or the environment, continued reading.
"You could say that the obsession certain people have with characters that don't exist is a mental disability of some sort. They create entire lives and stories for people that aren't real. It isn't on a personal basis either, it's mass hysteria over this stuff. I'm fairly sure this gibbering mania has something to do with the erosion of the mind."
Lexaeus blinked.
"But then you actually start thinking about erosion, and you realize that that can't possibly be the case! They are obsessed with Axel, and yet he's fire! Fire burns, it doesn't erode. Does this mean that they are, in fact, being burnt alive? I mean I've seen things about panties being set on fire, but I didn't think they meant it quite that literally."
Lexaeus turned another page.
"I mean his hair only got that way because Larxene actually caught him after he did something. And people make fun of it too! But with him it's all 'oh look how sexy Axel's hair is!' Well mine would be sexy too if Zexion's sense of humor hadn't had a lobotomy! Fire burns, water erodes; say what you will about fire, but I've yet to see anyone put out a river."
Lexaeus could possibly have wondered if they had again wandered into the territory of environmental degradation before deciding that because it was Demyx, anything was possible.
"Hey Lex," Demyx started.
Lexaeus calmly scratched his nose.
"Has Zexion had a lobotomy?"