The next month was hard for Rachel. She couldn't shift the morning sickness and neither could she fathom why Eddie had become so hostile. She supposed she had been wrong about him – for a moment she'd felt as if he cared for her and she'd been ready to admit that maybe, just maybe she felt the same for him. Clearly her sister had beaten her yet again in the relationship department. Rachel shook herself. She shouldn't have been thinking that way; Eddie wasn't a prize however much Melissa paraded him around like one. No, Eddie was (had been) that special person that she had gradually started to let in to her private little world, the one she'd cared for more than she could've ever imagined. She noticed when he wasn't there, but when he was? It was like her puzzle of a life had finally been completed. She sighed, regretting her brain's freedom of thought. Eddie wasn't that person anymore and she supposed she half-deserved the emptiness he left for being so emotional and vulnerable to his affections. Reality was never as poetic as she had once imagined it to be.

The weeks drifted as Rachel went through her routine blindly day after day. She got up in the morning, tired and aching, grabbed a coffee and set off to school for another lonely few hours defusing everyone else's tensions – but just finding that her own intensified as she watched relationships mend themselves all around her. Not only that but she'd been getting more and more tired due to lack of sleep, something she couldn't really understand. She got home each night desperately in need of rest but when she tried to, sleep would just not come. It may've been an extreme case of insomnia but she'd never suffered from it before and it had come on so quickly. This was just about the worst timing as well, she thought bitterly as she pulled into the car park to be emotionally slapped in the face with the picture of Eddie and Melissa kissing in front of their car. Yes, "their" car, she sighed. Everything was shared between the two now and it just made lunchtimes all the more sickening for the staff who had to watch the public show of communal eating every day. Rachel shuddered, but tucked her hair behind her ear and steeled herself mentally for the day ahead, ensuring that her face didn't show anything of the emotional turmoil she felt inside.

Professionalism is key, I don't feel anything towards Eddie Lawson but respect as a colleague, she told her disbelieving brain…

She was sat in her office when the inevitable knock came, but the person who poked their head around the door wasn't someone she'd been expecting.

"Steph, erm… hi!"

"Hello," she answered, walking in to stand opposite the desk and tottering slightly on her impressive heels.

"So, to what do I owe the pleasure?" Rachel asked a little warily. It was no secret that the French teacher only talked to her when she absolutely had to, and even then it was nearly always for personal gain.

"Oh, y'know," Steph shrugged. "I came to see if you were alright." Rachel couldn't stop her eyebrow instinctively rising.

"Oh yes?"

"Mmhmm… just thought that you and Mr Lawson might like some help in the matchmaking department, that's all."

"Right." She could see where this was going.

"I was just wondering, speed dating seemed to work so well for Grantly and Fleur-"

"Steph, Eddie's engaged."

"Eddie was engaged to Melissa before, all it took was for someone to point out that you possibly had feelings for each other and it was all over," she reasoned.

"I really can't. She's still my little sister."

"She's still the person who stole Eddie from you." Steph was nothing if not blunt. Rachel sighed. She knew that Steph was simply trying to help in a very uncharacteristic manner but whoever she was she wasn't a homewrecker. No, this relationship had to run its course and she wasn't going to interfere in someone else's feelings for her own selfish needs.

"I'm sorry Steph, it's not going to happen. I'm not going to be the one who steals the man, I know how it feels to be on the receiving end of that and it's something I wouldn't wish on anyone."

"Right. Okay. I tried at least." Rachel smiled at her and went back to her work, reckoning that the conversation was over. Steph hovered.

"Is there anything else you want?"

"Well, I was thinking… another speed dating night would bring the whole community closer together-"

"Let me stop you there," Rachel said, grinning. "If I say you can have your heinous idea of fun will you stop badgering me about Mr Lawson and I?" Steph nodded eagerly,

"You can count on me, Miss Mason," she said before hurrying out of the office before the decision could be unmade.

Rachel put her pen down and sighed, resting her head on her arms. She was so tired. Her predicament didn't go unnoticed however, in particular to one man perched on the roof opposite the head's window. He had seen the purple circles under her eyes before they'd been expertly covered in make-up and he'd seen the way she'd done everything incredibly carefully so as not to use up the little energy she had left. He grinned a grin that would send shivers down most people's spines. Chronic tiredness meant that stage two was complete and he was pretty sure that no-one else actually cared enough to ask what was going on. So now it was just him and her and he was picking her off more easily than he could've ever dreamed. His brother had said that she was tough, a nasty piece of work and he had believed him. He just wished that he could've been here to see the shell that the supposedly mighty Rachel Mason had become - he would've been so proud of him.

//

The door to the head teacher's office was open, the pair inside knowing that there was no need for it to be shut, not now. They had used to disappear for hours on end after school, sliding the glass window across and firmly closing the door with a kindly message for Bridget to guard the way lest they be interrupted. The assistant herself would always smile, knowing that they'd be there for a long time after she'd gone home to put her feet up. Now however she had no place to smile at the prospect of Rachel Mason and Eddie Lawson holing up in the office or to fantasise about what may be going on behind closed doors. She knew they'd shared everything, even though both were incredibly private about their personal lives – but she had no need to wonder what they were talking about now as she could always hear their conversations, clear as day through the wide open, welcoming window that divided her desk from her boss's office. Now the exchanges were brisk, clipped and to the point and couldn't be described as any other thing but business.

They didn't share anything anymore.

The pair in question sat inside, Rachel at her desk with Eddie opposite her, both ignoring the suffocating silence that had surrounded them the past few weeks. Since the engagement had been re-announced and the resulting fall-out had died away, all that had been left were two broken people. One had been just about able to cope with it having become hardened over the years thanks to the amount of emotional heartbreak she'd endured but the other was kidding himself, with a relationship he didn't really want and a woman he'd only got with to lessen the pain of what he'd gone through.

Rachel signed her signature with a flourish and practically threw the pen down, successfully jerking Eddie out of his lethargic state in the process.

"All done, that was the last one," she said, referring to the batch of reports they'd been approving all afternoon, her expression of relief soon morphing into a yawn.

"Oh, I'm sorry – am I keeping you up?" he asked shrewdly. His tone aside, the poor attempt at a joke wasn't lost on Rachel and she smiled lightly, pleased that he had tried to alleviate the tension that had accompanied every single one of their meetings lately.

"Sorry," she apologised, standing and starting to pack her belongings into her briefcase, "I've just been really tired lately, I haven't been getting much sleep." She temporarily froze. Why had she just said that? It wasn't like it was anything to do with him.

"No, I don't doubt you haven't," Eddie muttered in a voice he knew was too loud to be unheard.

"I beg your pardon?" Rachel frowned incredulously, "what do you mean by that?!"

"Oh, nothing."

"Yes, you did." She moved to sit again, her eyes blazing. What was he insinuating? Eddie shook his head.

"You mean to say you're not going to offer an explanation? What does it take for you to just be honest with me Rachel?" Silence followed until Eddie sighed heavily. "Fine. Seems as though I'm going to have to do all the groundwork, as always. I know your little secret Rachel, Mel told me. I can't believe you felt like I didn't deserve to know." Rachel was a little taken aback. How had her sister found out? She'd been careful, only told the people that she'd had to. It wasn't like anyone else would be the slightest bit interested anyway.

"Look, I'm sorry Eddie, but I really don't see how this is any of your business. Now if you'll excuse me I'd quite like to get home."

"You don't see how this is any of my business? You knew that I cared for you Rachel, why couldn't you just say something instead of me having to find out second hand from Melissa?"

"Frankly I don't know how she found out, I didn't tell anyone but the board about my resignation."

"Your resignation?!"

"Yeah." Rachel shrugged. "What did you think I was talking about?"

"The fact you've been sick every morning, that's what."

"Oh, that."

"Yes, that!"

"Didn't know you cared Eddie."

"Course I do. But this begs the question again: why didn't you tell me?" Rachel shrugged.

"When you didn't ask about it then I figured I had no reason to stay – it's why I handed my resignation in. I've given my all to this place Eddie and I've suddenly found I haven't got anything more. That's why I'm moving back home."

"Home? You mean the country? Hell yeah Rach, that'll do it, just run away and leave us to clear up the mess you leave behind." Something inside of Rachel suddenly snapped.

"I've heard enough. Goodnight Eddie, I'm going home" Her tone was stiff and cold.

"Home?" He couldn't resist sniping at her as she gathered her things and headed towards the door. "Don't you mean 'just that house that I live in in Rochdale that means flip all to me'?!" She paused in the doorway, sighing.

"I've recommended you for the headship. I'll schedule a meeting for next week to go over the finer points of the job so you can maximise your chances of winning it. The post's as good as yours Eddie if you want it. Just thought you'd like to know." She turned on her heel and left a very conflicted deputy in her wake.