AN: Let me straighten some stuff out. The timeline for SM is after Stars. FMA's timeline is going to be screwed up. Ed's going to be a couple of years older, but he's still relatively short. There's probably going to be spoilers so be warned! So don't have a nervous breakdown if something's out of whack. Just breath. If the ambulance still takes you then good luck. Otherwise, thank you for reading and reviewing!

AAN: I am so sorry it has taken me so long to update. Honestly, I've had this chapter written years ago, but I've never updated because I hate editing. This has been vaguely edited now, but it's not great work of literary merit so beware! Please, excuse the tenses.

Chapter 5: Hmph with a Hint of the Divine Lord's Punishment

"For the last time lady, stop following me," screamed a short, almost non-existent, boy.

In response, a girl not much taller than the boy, attached herself to him and nauseatingly whined, "Edina-chaannn! You know I can't leave! I've got nowhere to go!"

"Edina-chan" continued walking even as Usagi hung onto his neck and dragged her feet. "Besides you have to buy me shoes," Usagi chirped.

Finally, Ed snapped. He stopped walking as he fisted his hands. "Shoes! Shoes! I'm not some charity! And while I'm at it, my name's Ed! What, did you think I was so microscopically short that I was a GIRL-"

Usagi dismantled herself from Edward's neck, tuned out his voice and observed him.

His braid swished furiously as his arms moved to and fro, veins pulsating on his forehead while his cheeks turned into a furious red color. His hysterics was more spectacular than Rei's. I can't wait till I tell Rei about this, Usagi thought. I wondered which of the two would win in a yelling match? Hey, is that a shoe store?

In a sudden burst, Usagi grabbed Edward and drug him towards the shop she had spotted. "My luck has finally changed," she exclaimed, but Ed took no notice. He continued yelling about idiots who couldn't tell the difference between a female and a male. In fact, he commented that he was not as short as a pubescent schoolgirl whose growth was stunted by crack usage, but a growing boy who would soon be at least a foot taller than Usagi. In-between his "facts of wisdom," Edward made sure to add in some milk insults. He could never understand why people drank such a disgusting substance.

His outburst worked to Usagi's benefit. Without incident, Usagi escorted Edward into the shoe store, found a pair of tennis shoes (she really wanted a cute pair of heels, but she knew it would just kill her to walk in them) while Ed referred to the finer points of midget-ism.

As Usagi limped over to the register, she snatched a pair of socks and calmly handed her items to the woman at the register who, every once in awhile, glanced at Usagi's bare feet and grimaced.

Scanning the two items, Grimacy (as Usagi liked to call the woman) pronounced the price. "That'll be fifty dollars."

Excited by the prospective of actually walking in shoes, Usagi spun around to face Edward and, as Edward saw it, impolitely interrupted him. How dare she interrupt his teachings of why milk must be banned from all stores!

"May I see your wallet, please, Edward?"

Ed withdrew his wallet from the inside of his coat without pausing his lecture. It was quite amazing, really.

Usagi deftly grabbed his wallet and shimmed out two twenties and a ten dollar bill. She handed it over to Grimacy and smiled. "Here you go, thank you." She wore her new socks and shoes and waltzed out of the building.

Out on the streets, Usagi realized she had forgotten someone. She quickly stuck her head back into the store and lightly stomped her foot. "Edina-chan! Let's go! I know you feel particularly attached to that pair of stilettos, but pink definitely doesn't match your coat."

Childishly, Edward stomped through the doorway while he grumbled under his breath.

"Don't be such a drama queen Edina-chan," Usagi whined. "Besides, here's your wallet." She flippantly tossed the black leather into his hands.

Edward was flabbergasted. Hastily, he checked the inside of his wallet. "Where's my money!"

Usagi twirled in a circle and stuck out her foot. "Right here," she crowed happily. "Aren't they wonderful? Thanks by the way."

"Who said you could use my money," he vehemently asked.

Usagi blinked as innocently as possible. "You gave me your wallet. I'm sorry. I just assumed since I protected you from that angry mob I could buy some shoes. Guess not." She mournfully stared at her shoes.

Edward cringed as Usagi's face became desolate and when she mentioned the mob he knew he wouldn't win. If it wasn't for the fact that she didn't own a pair of shoes there was no way he would allow her to keep the new shoes…but those feet…they were awful! They looked like that went through a grinder! Why didn't she have any shoes?

Keeping his eyes skyward, Ed scratched his head. "Don't worry about it."

Usagi hugged Edward. "Thanks, Edina-chan!"

"Yeah, yeah. Now stop with the hugging. People are starting to stare. It's embarrassing," Ed mumbled. A pink tint dusted his cheeks.

Usagi disentangled herself from Edward and happily faced the market way. "Where to next?"

"I'm going to headquarters," Ed remarked and left in the opposite direction.

"Lead the way, Mistress Edina-chan," Usagi bellowed. She marched after Ed.

Edward said a few colorful words to himself, but otherwise proceeded peacefully as he stuffed his hands into his pockets. After a few tense minutes, Edward broke the silence and softly asked, "Usagi, why are you in Central?"

"Eh?" Usagi's thought process paused for an instant as she thought of an answer. Bashfully she giggled, but within seconds the giggles died and Usagi smiled wistfully. "Truthfully, I was separated from my friends. I thought my best chances would be to find a city so I came here. I'm hoping I can find a way to reach them, but I'm not so sure."

Aww, so she was stretching the truth a bit, but it wasn't a complete lie.

Ed twisted his head so he could address Usagi. "The military might be able to help."

"Really?"

"Yeah." He faced forward. "They have all kinds of resources. You might be able to find your friends." Hesitantly, he added, "Just don't give up."

"I won't. Thank you, Edward." A genuine smile lit Usagi's face.

Maybe I can, Usagi thought. Maybe I can find a way home. If nothing else, there's the crystal, but I can only use that as a last possibility. It's too dangerous. Too unreliable.

"Welcome." Edward speed up and turned into an alleyway, his coat swishing.

Usagi, in no hurry, followed Edward at a much slower pace. As she neared the alley, she heard the noise of a scuffle. Swiftly, Usagi darted into the passageway and found Edward fighting another man.

Surprisingly, Edward could actually fight. He sprang off of the wall, a blade sticking out of his sleeve and his eyes eerily resembled a cat's. The man opposite of Ed dodged, but stuck his right hand out as his hand emitted a foreboding red glow.

In that split second, the man's face was lit by the red light. "Scar," Usagi sputtered. "What are you doing?!"

Edward and Scar immediately jumped away from each other. Scar mildly glanced at Usagi and hid his surprise. However, the same couldn't be said about Edward.

"You know him!" Ed yelled.

A bit sheepish, Usagi grinned awkwardly. Man, was she bad at picking friends. She definitely needed to work on her homicidal radar. "Ah, yeah. Kind of. You see, I was wandering around this deserty, rocky place when I saw-"

She never got a chance to finish her sentence. Scar ran towards Edward and lashed out with his tattooed hand as he aimed for Ed's head. Edward flinched, horrified that he was caught off guard. He tried to step away, but it was too late. Scar slammed Ed against the wall and gripped his head. Edward's eyes grew wide in fascinated terror as Scar's hand lit up. Ed waited for his head to explode, but his head remained firmly attached to his body. Usagi held a sword against Scar's throat.

"You are not a state alchemist. I do not wish to kill you, but if you get in my way, I will," Scar barked at Usagi.

Usagi was stunned. He totally broke his one word rule! That was so messed up, but Usagi forced herself to be serious. She couldn't allow herself to be distracted. Her childlike pigtails fluttered in the wind as she grimly held her stance.

"I may not be one of these alchemists, but Edward helped me. He's my friend and even though you also helped me I can't allow you to harm him. If you hurt him, I will kill you." She raised her head just as a wind swept her bangs aside. A crescent moon brightly shone on her forehead, and Edward and Scar could have sworn they saw the outline of wings on her back.

"What-" Edward breathed, "What are you?"

Usagi ignored him. Her attention could not be torn away from Scar. He had proved he would take advantage of any unguarded moment. "Scar. Run. Please, just run," Usagi begged. "Don't force me to fight you."

The two watched each other, trying to predict the other's move when Scar finally gave in. "Fullmetal," he rumbled. "You have escaped the Lord's divine punishment, but only by His angel's will. Don't forget that." Scar released his hold on Ed's head and Ed slid down the wall. He fell heavily onto the ground, eyes unfocused.

Scar waited for Usagi's next move. Slowly, she removed the sword from his neck and stood in front of Edward. Scar nodded in acknowledgement, "Angel."

Scar pressed his hand against the wall. The brick exploded into a fine dust and Scar disappeared into the dust storm. In Usagi's opinion, Scar's dramatic get-a-way almost made up for his lack of wardrobe taste.

Ed issued a groan from behind her. "I have to report this to headquarters!" .

"Yes, but you are alive," Usagi replied optimistically. "Besides you were already going there! Think of this as one of life's detours," she wisely preached. "Like when you go to buy a new issue of Sailor V, but find out that they're gone. Man, that's the worse. I know from experience."

"Yeah, right," Ed grumbled, standing up and dusting off his pants. "So what are you?"

"Well, about that," Usagi trailed off, scratching her head. "Could you not tell anyone about me? You know, the whole crazy moon stuff?"

Edward vaguely "Hmphed" in response and began his trek to Headquarters. Usagi took his response as a positive.

Oh, this is going to be so much fun, Usagi silently rejoiced. This is the best non-chosen vacation ever!