...stand still, stay silent.
there isn't anything left here.
what am i left with now?
its over.

by my very best friend, Jenna Brower

--

Naruto had never felt so down in his life.

For one thing, he couldn't stop thinking about the almost-kiss he almost shared with his ex lover, Sasuke. For another, Sasuke wouldn't stop staring at him, and for a third thing, Naruto couldn't keep his eyes off of Hinata's ass. And the worst part of it was: he had no control over any part of the situation. (And he had put no effort towards trying.)

Throughout the remaining hour of the day he considered two options: one, purposely getting sent to detention so he could sneak up to the roof with Shikamaru and watch as his friend smoked a box of cigs at a time, or option two, jump off the roof while his smoker friend watched him fall to the death. Option one seemed pretty boring, but jumping was kind of out-of-the-picture and Naruto was definitely not suicidal.

He and Kiba were sitting in the back of their Trig class during that last hour, bored out of their minds. Kiba said something totally random and completely un-Kiba-like. "You know, Hinata's ass is pretty big."

Kiba was never one to point out anything that had to do with a female human. His friends called him Inu-baka, and they told him that the only thing he'd get as a girlfriend is a bitch. Kiba didn't like that joke. He told his sister, Hana, that they were making fun of him and Hana got her triplet pups out and they attacked Naruto and Choji. It was not fun, nor was it ladylike of Hana.

Naruto and Choji both had to beg her for hours to get her to sew up their pants, and when she did, their pants looked like they just came out of the hospital from getting stitches.

"Yea, she's really pretty." Naruto said.

"Ha! I remember you never bothered to look at her back when we were kids." Kiba barked. Both of the teens had quit doing their work a half an hour ago. They were just as lazy as their math teacher, who just so happen to be buried in his porno book.

"What are you talking about, pup?" Naruto retorted, cocking a brow at his best friend.

"She baked you a cupcake for your seventh birthday in first grade, but she never got a chance to give it to you because you said 'I'll see you around, Hinata!' and ran off -- and you ran off for Sasuke. Didn't you like, hold his hand when you walked away?" Naruto opened his mouth to say something back, but Kiba didn't let him speak.

"Hinata used to bring that creepy doll that looked like you in for show and tell in third grade, and you wouldn't even notice. Then in fifth grade she offered you her lunch because you forgot your money and you didn't even hear her –"

"No one could hear her! She was so damn quiet," Naruto yelled quietly so that only Kiba could hear. Hinata was sitting in the front of the class, but he didn't want to take his chances.

"You fail to realize how much she gave you back then, Naruto."

Naruto shook his head, almost disgusted with himself. Did Kiba really have that good of a memory? Did he really turn the poor girl down so many times?

Now he was feeling even more down.

"What else?"

"Uh… well in middle school she would follow us to the playground a lot. I was the only one who would talk to her, of course. I'd make up excuses for you, like when she asked me why you didn't take her money. I told her you had an ear infection. Although, I don't think she bought it…" he snickered.

"Man, I was really a jerk to her."

"Yeah, but you were young. We all were." Kiba sighed, looking down at the cover of his notebook that had a picture of a young Kiba, Hinata and Shino Auburame all smiling up with a puppy in the middle. The puppy was Akamaru, and he was now a huge dog. "I miss them. We used to be so close, but when Hinata and Shino started hanging out with Neji and Sasuke, we just drifted."

"Everyone drifted. Sasuke and I used to be inseparable, believe it or not."

"I remember. You guys had a lot in common."

"Yeah. We were best friends, with a very, very... similar past."

Kiba looked at Naruto, noticing how troubled he looked. "You two never hung out with us."

"He never liked groups, and we had more fun with just the two of us."

"Now he's just a bastard, right?" Naruto couldn't help but laugh. He was indeed a bastard, and a damn cute one at that.

Memories filled up in Naruto's head as if they were actually happening. When he looked out the window of the classroom, he saw a young blonde sitting under a tree with a brunette boy who was a few inches taller than him. When he looked at the old playground, he saw the same blonde boy and his younger friends, Kiba, Shikamaru and Choji playing, and then, he saw the little girl, sitting all alone on the bench, fiddling with her fingers.

Although, now the blonde would have wanted to be the one to comfort her, but instead he saw a young Kiba going over to bench.

He couldn't change the past. He'd have to make it up to Hinata, in some shape or form, but he had no idea how.

The only way to get to her is through Neji, who was Sasuke's 'henchman', who was 'in love' with Naruto. To operate his plan of action, he'd have to make a choice and decide before it was too late. He'd have to lie to Sasuke to make him think that he was into him, slip by Neji with that and then help Hinata. But was 'saving' Hinata really worth breaking Sasuke's heart at the same time? Did Hinata really need to get out? Did she even want it? It was she who joined the Clan after all.

And that's the other thing. What if Hinata didn't want to be on her own? What if she turned down the offer? What would he do about Sasuke? What would be the consequences of even attempting to do it all? Was it worth it?

Was it really worth it?

Naruto knew he wouldn't be able to stand another heart break, even if it wasn't his. Just when he was getting over it, Sasuke brought himself back into the story and now Naruto didn't know what to do. He cared about his heart, and he cared about Hinata -- but why did he care about Sasuke, too? Sasuke was long gone. Why should Naruto care if Sasuke was left broken, too?

Answer: Naruto was a good person. Sasuke was not good with coping with heart break. Up to the present, Sasuke's mind, heart and soul still dwelled and longed for his beloved family. His dead family, his missing brother... back then, Sasuke needed Naruto, and he was always there for him. He never let Sasuke down up until Sasuke ditched him for.

For another thing, he knew little about Hinata. He knew so little that he failed to realize that she had a crush on him for years!

How blind! The birthday, the park, everything! He didn't even notice the girl who was there for most of his life, the one who probably knew everything about him that Sasuke knew, the girl who he knew no more about than her name, sister and her cousin. He knew Sasuke inside and out, but not Hinata. How could he not have paid attention? How could no one have told him? Sasuke knew, he said so on the bridge the previous night. Kiba knew, Shikamaru knew. Naruto seemed to be the only one knew nothing.

Guilt filled his ever-loving heart, and it sunk down deep into his stomach, making him sick. Sick of himself, sick of Sasuke, sick of his friends, sick of listening to his teacher yell, "Naruto, Naruto! Snap out of it and pay attention!"

Wait --

Naruto's head snapped up, his forehead tinted red from resting it on the wooden desk.

"K-Kaka-sensei,"

"Stop dozing off, Naruto." The students, and Kiba, snickered in the background.

"I'm sorry, Kaka-sensei. I just feel sick.

"Then go to the nurse." Kakashi sighed, massaging his forehead. Naruto obeyed, waving to Kiba as he walked out the door.

Naruto walked around the entire corridor before he headed to the nurse. He needed to get this off his chest.

He still had a painful decision in a matter of short time. Sasuke... Hinata... Hinata... Sasuke... What a painful thing. Why did it have to be now, of all times? Couldn't it wait until next century when they were all dead and dried bone? And of all topics. Why 'love'? Why couldn't it be butterflies or firetrucks? Why was it boy or girl? Why not peaches or apples? Why did he have to be so stupid!? Sasuke must have been right all along. He really was a moron.

But he didn't love Sasuke, right? He was over him. It was time to move on, possibly to Hinata.

Naruto made his way to the roof where he found Shikamaru, doing what he did best: smoking.

"Hey, Naruto. What are you doing up here?"

"I'm in trouble."

"Kakashi send you to the office?

"No, I meant in my love life. Sasuke and I were talking --"

"Wow. You actually had a conversation?"

"Yeah, but it was a complicated one. Wanna hear the story?"

Shikamaru nodded and leaned puffed on his cigarette.

"Back when we were young... we kind of... dated, for a year. But we broke up. Then last night he showed up on the bridge, but we didn't really fight. He told me that he wanted me back or something stupid like that, but I think I kind of have this crush on Hinata Hyuuga, but I don't know if she still likes me. But I don't care. I just want to make up for ignoring her for so long, but the only way to do that is by breaking Sasuke's heart.

"I mean, I don't want to, but I really feel like I have to help her and get her away from Neji and Sasuke. But I'm afraid that I'll make Sasuke hurt more because he never really got over his family situation."

Shikamaru took a last puff of his cigarette and threw it over the roof. "Look, I think that you should sort things out with Sasuke first. I don't think it's his family situation he's not over. From the sound of it, he's not over you."

"Wha-- you don't care that I... that we're... half gay?"

"Naruto, you are my friend no matter what or who you are. I'm not the love guru, but I know what you are going through. Ino had a huge thing for me, and so did Temari. After a while I ended up falling for Temari, though that only lasted for a while. You don't choose who you love, Naruto. But if your feelings are stronger for one, sort it out. Don't go after one out of pity."

"But... how?" Naruto said, looking out at the cloudy sky. Shikamaru sighed and looked up with Naruto, thinking about how dimwitted his friend could be.

"Sometimes it takes a while. You and I are different. If you want to help Hinata, do it. But if you love Sasuke, I wouldn't try to get with her. Hinata may not return your feelings because of the past, but if you lead her on, she might get the wrong idea if you go out with Sasuke. Just give it some time before you decide. And don't think too hard. You'll hurt yourself."

"So, you're saying I should help Hinata get away from the Clan, but fall in love with the leader of the Clan I want her away from?" That sounded a bit hypocritical.

"Sasuke and I were never friends from that start. Personally, I never liked him. But, yes, that's what I'm saying. Who knows, you might end up saving Sasuke, too,"

Naruto stood there in silence, thinking about his plan and what Shikamaru had told him. But with the advice, how could he choose? He'd never been with Hinata, ever, and Sasuke could have changed since they were young. Sasuke was growing up and falling in love again, while Hinata was growing up and possibly moving on.

It was like the love triangle. Sasuke loved Naruto, but Naruto had a thing for Hinata, but Hinata... that was unsure. Naruto wanted to love both of them at the moment, but there was only one of him.

"Being bisexual is tough." Shikamaru laughed at Naruto. Naruto grinned and rolled his eyes, looking up at the sky. Sasuke... Hinata... Both of them were beginning to steal his heart, and he had a tough decision to make.

"You are, too, huh?" Naruto stated it more than asked. Shikamaru didn't answer. He pulled out another cigarette and lighted it up. Naruto smiled. He felt more comfortable now.

There was a difference between him and Kiba. Kiba made him realize things he would have never seen and Shikamaru helped him with his options. Without one of them, Naruto would probably be brain dead.

"Sasuke?"

Shikamaru said, surprised. Naruto turned his head instantly. Sasuke was also surprised to see them on the roof as well, but he walked over to them, nonetheless.

"What are you doing up here?" He asked blankly, standing beside Naruto.

"T-talking… What about you?" Naruto asked weakly.

"I got bored with Iruka's class so I decided skipping the last half hour wouldn't hurt."

"Oh." There was an awkward silence before Shikamaru finished his cigarette and said goodbye. He winked at Naruto and walked to the door that led back inside. Once he was gone, Sasuke got right down to business.

"I'm sorry, Naruto." Said blonde looked at Sasuke, wide eyed. To think the brunette had too much Uchiha pride to apologize to the likes of him. Of course, said Uchiha was 'in love' with Naruto. "I moved on you too quickly. I should have kept my distance."

"I forgot." Now Sasuke was looking at Naruto, a big hint of confusion in his charcoal eyes.

"Forgot?"

"Yes, I forgot. I forgot what it felt like to be so close to someone, to feel so comfortable next to another person. When we stopped talking and you started to hang out with different people, I felt empty. But don't be sorry for making me remember the good feelings, though, Sasuke." Naruto said to the clouds. He refused to make eye contact with the other, not when he was about to make his choice.

"Naruto... I --"

"Let her go."

"What?"

"I'm talking about Hinata. You and Neji make everyone feel inferior."

"How the hell did she get into this?"

"It's not about you and me anymore. I'm over you, and you need to be over me. I like Hinata now, but she's stuck in your little group. Let her go."

Sasuke was furious. Not about him, his ass.

"Look, it was her choice to hang out with us. I didn't put her on chains and we certainly don't brag her around –"

"Like hell!" Naruto stood face to face with the brunette. Forget reason. He might have to force Sasuke to understand. "You think someone as fragile as Hinata could ever do something alone? She needs someone to lean on, and that someone should not be Neji, and definitely not you."

"Now you just sound stupid."

"You're in love with this stupid person, remember?"

"I never said I wasn't."

Naruto was about to yell his retort, but pale hands grabbed his shoulders and pulled him close. Soft lips connected with his for the second time since last night. There was no parting of the lips on both ends. There was no tongue involved. It was just a long kiss goodbye.

"You kissed me back. Remember that, loser."