A/N:
Chekov/Sulu and our final Nyota/Spock, leading to entry into Kirk/Spock friendship. Still don't own Trek. Enjoy!
31. Mother
"Commander Spock? May I speak to you for a moment?" Chekov stood at the door to the science lab.
"You may, Ensign."
"Thank you very much, sir." The boy was clearly nervous.
"Please sit down..." Spock pointed at a stool on the other side of the lab table he was working at. "And speak, Ensign."
"Umm... well I think you know that my mother recently passed away." Spock's shoulders visibly tensed. "And I was just... curious... as to..."
"You believe that since I have incurred a similar tragedy I may be able to guide you through your own." Chekov's eyes looked sad as he nodded. The first officer reminded himself that the boy before him was only eighteen. Still a child. "As a Vulcan, my ways of confronting my mother's death are different than yours."
"Oh. Perhaps I should go, then..."
"However, I am aware that the least I could do is listen to your worries and provide you with logical answers." It was an offer, Chekov realized... Spock-speak for 'Talk to me.'
"I am afraid I will forget her. I am sad because she is dead. I am angry... I am a well of feeling I cannot control. Sulu tries to make it better but he doesn't know what to do."
"Logically, as long as you keep your mother in memory you will not forget her."
"But thinking of her makes me sad, angry."
"As it should." The answer that passed from Spock's lips surprised even himself. "In such a situation, when someone is taken from us before we are ready for them to leave... sadness and anger are expected." He paused. "We must work past them and find happiness yet again."
"It's hard."
Spock's tone was almost comforting. "It will be hard to be happy, but we must allow ourselves joy in things." The Vulcan wondered when he began to say 'we' instead of 'you'. For how long had he been talking about the both of them, and not just the Ensign? The whole conversation has been about the both of you, an inner voice prompted.
Chekov's eyes shone a bright blue and he wiped two tears from his cheeks, embarrassed. "I'm sorry."
"It is illogical to apologize for an emotion you cannot control." It was comfort to the Ensign and to the deep, swelling pain that had developed in Spock's chest. "And I certainly do not ask you too."
32. Drunk
He was a clingy drunk, which might explain why he had fallen into bed with so many women. He was a loud drunk, which would explain why he had started so many fights over the years. He was a funny drunk, which definitely explains why people enjoyed his company at bars. What no one knew was exactly what kind of drunk you had to be to solve complex logarithms blindfolded. It didn't matter... Kirk was one of those too.
33. Storage
It had been high school since she had done something like this, Christine realized. McCoy was busy kissing her in all the right places, and she conceded that she should have been focused on him and not her memories. But really? How often did two people over thirty hook up in a storage closet at work? The last condition didn't count, Christine reminded herself. They lived at work. Privacy was hard to come by so this wasn't really whorish. It was... opportunistic. And you know what they say... when opportunity knocks...
Oh wait... Christine separated herself reluctantly from the doctor in front of her. That was real knocking. Knocking on the door outside of the closet. The knob had to have rattled without them knowing. Damn. They were caught. The key was turning. McCoy sent her a daring glance and then spoke up... "Do you think you could give me just a second to get some things in order in here?" He was buttoning his shirt, she was straightening her hair.
"Doctor I see no reason for you to have locked yourself in my storage closet." Oh great... it was Spock. Christine could think of a thousand other people she would have wanted to have caught her having sex. Spock ranked just a very small smidge above her father.
"Look Spock, just give me a second." He assured that both he and Christine were in decent shape and then unlocked the door and opened it. He strode out a met Spock's eyes. There was a silence. It only took the Vulcan a moment to peg the situation.
"May I suggest an unoccupied closet in the fifth level medbay the next time you wish to engage in sexual congress? Some of my equipment is very sensitive and should not be subjected to such disruption."
McCoy turned an angry red. Christine turned on her heels and walked away; she intended to find a small, isolated corner of the world and die.
34. Stars
"The beauty of the stars is a bit strange, don't you think, Pavel?"
"Why?" They were laying on their backs on foreign terrain. Night on this planet, Spock had calculated, lasted twice as long as night on Earth. In the light of such information, the landing party had pitched tents; a fire was burning in the center of the compound. The weather was a bit cold, but the clear sky provided an excellent view of the star field. As a cold wind blew across the tents, Chekov moved a little closer to Sulu.
"Essentially we fall in love with giant balls of burning gas. We're captivated by them... when really it sounds disgusting said out loud."
"I don't think its so much the stars we fall in love with..." Chekov concluded after a while. "I think it's the thrill of it all. Wanting to know what else is out there. Exploration." They fell silent once again. "Not knowing what we're going to find. That's why it's beautiful. It's an unexpected discovery. We can say we found it, so it's beautiful."
"Pavel?"
"Yes, Hikaru?"
"You we're my unexpected discovery."
35. Letters
Dear Daddy,
I don't know if you'll believe me, but I really hope you will. I've been writing you letters every month since I was twelve years old. I would give them to Mom to send to you. Turns out she would throw them away and leave me thinking you were to busy to deal with me... that you didn't care. I'm so sorry, Daddy. I'm so sorry I believed her.
But that's in the past. I can't change it. I'm eighteen now, and I'm sending my own letters. There is so much I want to tell you, but I don't know where to start. I still remember you, or at least I do a little bit. I remember you smelled like new leather and some form of bleach. I remember you took me horseback riding when I was three. I remember that you sat on that saddle with me for four hours, and even though you couldn't walk the next day, it didn't matter because I was happy.
Mom tries to tell me you were a horrible person... but I don't believe her. Because the Daddy I remember didn't drink and stumble around... he bandaged my skinned knees when I fell off of my first hover-board, and then healed them with kisses and a popsicle. The Daddy in my head never yelled and screamed at me if I knocked something over... he said a quiet prayer over the grave of my goldfish, Zeus, who died when I was two.
I want to tell you that I love you. I've been trying to do that for six years. I told you all about my first boyfriend, my first car, my first prom. But you never answered. I guess I just thought you were busy, so you ignored me. I want to tell you that I don't hate you, Daddy. I never did. Even when I thought you ignored me, I never hated you.
I feel there is so much to say to you, but I'm not even sure you want to hear it. I hope you do, but I can't be sure. I'm attending Starfleet in the fall, and I thought that maybe the next time the Enterprise comes back for shore leave... well maybe we could see each other?
Until then, much love and all my prayers,
Your Daughter
36. Home
"Ow!" Nyota exclaimed as her younger sister plaited her hair. The pulling and wrenching of the comb was incredibly uncomfortable. Her sister apologized but Nyota just smiled. "Don't worry about it. I have a hard head, remember?"
The younger girl laughed. "Yea, I do. Surprisingly enough. I haven't seen you in years." The tone was just a little bit accusatory. "But I suppose that's just the exciting life of lieutenant aboard the Enterprise. All done, Ny." She handed Nyota a mirror and watched her examine the plait.
"It's beautiful. You've learned well."
"I'm just thankful you didn't get all the family talents." They both laughed. Their small talk continued until an older voice called from downstairs. Dinner was ready. "Coming Mama!" They replied in synch. Dinner was magnificent. It was her first non-replicated meal in five years. The smells were almost intoxicating. Cloves and cinnamon and thyme and cracked pepper. Halfway through the meal her sister leaned over and whispered in her ear, "Isn't it great to be home?" Nyota could only smile. Yea... it was.
37. Knees
He couldn't take his eyes off of Sulu's knees. Kirk had to admit it was a strange obsession. The Captain was usually alone in the workout room aboard the Enterprise, but for the past two Wednesday's it seemed that Sulu's schedule was oddly similar to his. They would work in silence across from each other on the stationary bicycles.
It was here that Kirk got his first glimpse at Sulu's knees. He couldn't help but notice the small pieces that moved under the other man's olive skin every time the joint bent. They moved independent of the muscles in his legs, and they were cloaked in a shiny scar tissue. He had no idea what they were.
Deciding that it was strange to simply sit back and stare, Kirk chose today to ask Sulu about the particles that had taken residence in his knees. "Those are some strange scars, Mr. Sulu." Kirk commented from his stationary bike. Sulu didn't miss a beat.
"They're not really scars, Captain."
"What are they then, if you don't mind?"
"When I was a kid," It seemed Sulu didn't mind at all. "My teacher made me kneel on grains of uncooked rice." The young helmsman could remember the feeling of the harsh white grains as they dug into his knees. He could remember going to stand up and feeling blood run down his legs. He could remember trying to wash the granules out of his skin, but they had become so deeply entombed in his flesh that they wouldn't leave. He recounted all of this to Kirk. The other man winced.
"Why did he make you do that?"
Sulu smiled almost ruefully. "The punishment was intended to humble me... because I always had the highest marks in class."
Kirk laughed unexpectedly. "Looks like you showed him. I mean you're working on board the Enterprise. Plus you're about the most humble guy I know."
There was a pause for a moment and then Sulu shared the laugh... "Yea, I guess I did."
38. Fall
It wasn't like he was afraid, Scotty reasoned with himself. What was there to be afraid of? Okay... she was pretty. She was smart. She was green. She was pretty. She had a great voice. She could handle a wrench better than anyone else in engineering. She was pretty. She was also young. She was no match for any ship system. She could hack anything. She could stop anyone dead in their tracks. Oh, and did he mention she was pretty? It was hard to focus to much on what was coming out of her mouth when she was standing directly in front of you. Or at least it was for Scotty. He found it hard to focus on anything except what she'd look like without her close. He imagined she'd look like Christmas.
It wasn't like he was in danger. It wasn't like a rejection would so far defeat his pride that he would never be able to get up again. Scotty always got back up. He always got back in the saddle, to use one of Dr. McCoy's expressions. There were always other girls. Usually there were other fist in the sea. Scotty wasn't usually afraid of rejection. But the thing was... Scotty didn't usually fall this hard.
39. Goodbye
"Spock..." Her voice shook only slightly. She ran her thumb along his jaw line. He closed his eyes and took a steady breath. It was almost as if he knew what was coming. With his pale hand he touched her cheek. There was no spark in the gesture. "I can't do this anymore." He opened his mouth to speak, to agree, but she only silenced him with the touch of her soft finger on his lips. "It's not you." She said amazed at how cliche that sounded. "It's never been you." His hand was still on her cheek. "It's been a... pleasing year." The tears were forming now. With a soft brush of his thumb he wiped them away.
It pained her to see him like this, and she could not prolong that pain to herself. If it continued to hurt like this she would never walk away. She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him for a final time. It was chaste, and he was almost non-responsive. He removed his hand from her cheek. She turned to leave his quarters. At the door she looked over her shoulder and gave him a very sad smile, "Goodbye, Commander Spock."
40. Friend
Kirk left it to the two most logical people on board this ship to have the most illogical break-up. Or maybe that was just Kirk's skewed view of 'logical' break-ups (most included screaming, crying, and drinking). He had the choice of confronting either Spock or Nyota on the matter. He was two steps from the door to her quarters when he remembered that she really didn't like him that much. He promptly turned and searched out his first officer. The Vulcan was in the recreation room, studying the pieces of the tri-level chess board. There were many things Kirk could have said to start the conversation if it had been Bones, or Scotty, or even Sulu... but Spock? He was unsure...
"Are you okay?" The words left his mouth before he could stop them. Spock turned his head quickly and eyed Jim. A long and very awkward silence ensued.
"I am... satisfactory." He said finally. He placed the chess piece he was currently holding on the board. "I assure you that my and Lieutenant Uhura's recent decision to disband our relationship will in no way affect our work on the bridge."
"Good," Kirk walked over and sat in the chair across from Spock. "Because I was going to suggest that if it was a problem we have her transferred to the Jaxton." He smiled. Spock did not even blink.
"I believe that would be considered favoritism, Jim... in addition, her talents are exceptional in comparison to mine." Kirk thought about this for a moment.
"But I need you around Spock. You're my friend." Wait... that was wrong. He had meant to say 'first officer'... right? He hoped maybe Spock hadn't heard, but that was a stupid thought. Spock heard everything. He considered his statement a moment, and surprisingly he found his label was appropriate. The past year had cultivated between them a very enjoyable form of friendship.
However, Kirk felt he needed to apologize for being so upfront, and he was about to open his mouth when his eyes caught Spock's mouth turn up slightly at the corners. "Perhaps a game of chess?" Spock said. Kirk shook his head clear of the amazement he felt at what he now realized was Spock's smile. Why had he never noticed that before?
"Yea... yea that sounds great."
A/N:
I really liked how this chapter came together. All around I liked 40 and 31. 36, I feel, lacks a lot of the sentiment I wanted it to have. If you have seen anything in the past chapters or if you seen anything in those forthcoming that you would like to see extended, let me know! I'm looking for a bit of a longer project. Thanks everyone! Review and stay tuned for more! (And yes, that was shamelessly copied from the previous chapter...)