Disclaimer: I don't own Soul Eater.
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There's long spells- 3 days, and even years- when I can't see a thing, and I only know where I am when the harsh tones of Medusa-sama gives me my next assignment. But when I can see, the others are moving around as unconcerned as though they didn't notice the so many lies that cloud the air.
How can they not see them?
Even Ragnarok doesn't seem to know he's been fooled. If he does, he makes sure to not let on that he scared of it. He makes sure that I never see him bothered by anything; for he knows that there's no better way to protect yourself than by acting like your not bothered. I wish I could.
I used to be afraid. Terrified even. I still am. I would often wake up able to see: being able to hear the sounds of muffled whispers and even screams. Were they of pain? Happiness? Or were they just screams? I could never really tell. The smell of death heavy in the air… Right and left there are other things just as bad, horrible things too outlandish to cry out about, and all too real to laugh about - the madness is getting thick enough so that I begin to not see anything else other than those dark hands that reach and reach yet never touch. But something's tugging at my arm. I know already what will happen: somebody will drag me out of the madness, and we'll be back in that room again and there won't be a sign of what went on tonight and if I was a fool enough to try to tell Ragnarok about it he'd say:
" Idiot! You just had a nightmare; things as crazy as hands groping in darkness and people screaming and dying don't exist!"
But if they don't exist, why do I still see them? It is still there, just abiding its' time to attack once again when I'm vulnerable. Which is… nearly all the time. My throat itches to ask what he thinks we are, but words cannot form past my shaking lips. I know Ragnarok can't help it any more than I could. Nobody can help. And the more I think about how nothing can be helped, the faster the madness rolls in. What can I do? I'm weak, and I have no chance against it.
Is it really wrong that I'm glad when it is thick enough that I get lost in it? I… I can just let go of everything, and be safe again. There, at least, having Black blood is fine.
Unable to deal with these thoughts and feelings, I just cover my ears and try to block out all the screeching and ringing by going back to sleep.
It can wait for tomorrow.
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Authors Note: I hope you all enjoyed my take on Chrona's madness. =D I tried to make it sound like his own thoughts, and how he views his own madness. I think my next chapter will be a take off on this, I liked writing it.