A/N: Wow! This one his 11 pages on the word processor! Reviews make me a happy camper! :P Enjoy this one. It was written while I didn't pay attention in one of my literature classes. Hah...

Chapter Six: Closer

Saturday evening found James and Remus strolling across the grounds toward the Quidditch Pitch. James was shouldering his broomstick and Remus had his backpack. It was time for Quidditch trials, one of James' least favorite duties as a captain. Remus was the Gryffindor team's unofficial manager. It was his job to sit in the stands and observe seeing as James couldn't watch everyone at once.

"What are the numbers for?" James asked as Remus began pulling signs with block numbers on them out of his bag.

"It's easier to see who's who that way for me," Remus explained. He handed James the signs. "I've charmed them to stick to their robes. Give one to each player."

Twenty-one hopefuls put their names down for the two open positions on the team. James needed one beater and one chaser and was thoroughly prepared for the biggest headaches of his young life.

"Whose on the list?" James inquired. He hadn't seen it yet. Remus had only just retrieved it from the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Let's see..." Remus pulled the parchment from a folder in his bag. "We have Marcus Zellers, Nick White, Jason Fondys, Theresa McCleary, Donald Jones and Tyler Jenkins trying for beater. And then you have Alice Kineski, Laurie DuMont, Benjamin Keen, Douglas Merril, Joseph Bones, Gary Prince, Faye Anderson, Paul Holmes, Phillip Merril, Jennifer Stark, Mafelda Hopkirk, Steven Thomas, Kate Thomas, Calvin Johnson and..."

James glanced at Remus as he trailed off. "And..."

"Lily signed up," Remus said. He seemed to be in shock.

"James snatched up the list and scanned it until he located her name. "Someone must have written this as a joke," he said. "Lily said she didn't have time for Quidditch."

Apparently that meant nothing.

As James oversaw the snitchless scrimmage going on from high above, it became more and more clear that Lily was an amazing flyer. She was outperforming everyone except for Calvin Johnson at first. Calvin was scoring more goals, but as James watched more closely, it became clear that the only reason that Calvin Johnson was scoring so many goals was because Lily was setting him up with so many great passes and scoring chances.

James turned his broom and flew toward Remus' seats. "What do you think?" he shouted as he hovered above Remus' head. He slid off the broomstick to drop into the seat next to his friend.

"As far as your beater goes, I'd say the best choice is probably McCleary. She isn't the greatest...no Sirius, of course, but with some good training you could get a lot of of her."

"I'm glad you were paying attention to them. I was concentrating on the chasers."

"Johnson's dominating the quaffle," Remus noted. "Not many people can make it past your keeper."

"Very true," said James. "Watch though...he never gets the Quaffle. Lily keeps setting him up with those shots. Without her, he'd never get passed Sam. Watch."

James mounted his broom and flew toward the action. He called to Lily from above and motioned her to fly toward him. "Sit out for a moment, will you?" he said. "Remus and I need to conduct an experiment." He flew back to the stands and was next to Remus again in a flash. "Watch," he instructed.

Within five minutes, the other side had stopped every quaffle thrown at them and scored eighty points. James caught Lily's eye and motioned her to rejoin the scrimmage. The game changed course yet again and evened out.

"Merlin," Remus breathed. "She's-"

"Exactly what we need," said James.

For the second time, James mounted his broom to leave Remus. He blew his whistle and shouted, "On the ground!"

Remus met the team and James near the goal post. The twenty-one hopefuls stood a few yards away, all holding their breath and fidgeting. James looked at Remus, who nodded.

"Alright," he said, shouldering his own broom and beginning to pace in front of where his team stood. "This is my least favorite part of being the captain, but I can only take two of you. Having said that-welcome to the team McCleary and Evans. To the rest of you, better luck next year."

"That's bull!" Calvin Johnson shouted angrily. "I scored way more than she did! I'm the better player! You've just picked her because you like her, Potter."

Marcus Zellers hit Johnson in the back of the head. "Shut up, Cal," he said loudly. "She set you up with every single one of those goals. She is a way better player than you are."

"Thank you, Marcus," said James. "Have a good night, everyone."

As the nineteen who did not make the team left the field, Johnson arguing with Marcus Zellers, James turned to his team, smiling. "We're going to take it all the way this year," he said enthusiastically. "I'm very excited about this team. Now, as you should know, we're playing in the first match of the year. It's against Ravenclaw on November third. We're practicing Mondays and Wednesdays at seven thirty every week. Monday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday the week of the match. Is that alright for everyone? Good. See you on Monday evening."

Chatter broke out as the group headed toward the locker room. Lily hung back and James and Remus fell into stride with her.

"Since when, Miss Evans, do you have time for the great game of Quidditch?" James asked, offering up a lopsided grin.

"Well...I can always make some time."

"We're going to murder Slytherin this year!" James said excitedly. "This is the start of a beautiful season."

The next few weeks passed in a blur of schoolwork and Quidditch practice, prefect meetings and a full moon. Remus was refusing to allow James to accompany him to the Shrieking Shack anymore. Sirius and Peter hadn't even bothered to offer, knowing that it would put an unnecessary strain on their already fragile relationship with Remus.

On the night of the full moon, a Friday, James could be found lounging on the couch in front of the fire in his common room. He was doing some reading on memory charms as he dwelled on his team's last Quidditch practice. It had been quite successful-mostly flying drills this time. His team was impressing him so far.

Suddenly, the suit of armor that stood next to the entrance to the tower came to life, his booming voice making James jump up and pull out his wand. It had frightened him; his heart was going two thousand miles an hour before he realized what the noise was.

"James?"

James' eyes snapped open. He realized that he must have dozed as he read, for he did not hear Lily enter the common room. Her own eyes were sweeping the room. "What's up?" James asked. He smiled at her.

"I was just in a meeting with Professor McGonagall," said Lily. She dropped into one of the armchairs by the fire. "Dumbledore burst into the office and said there was an emergency...said he needed McGonagall to go with him and he asked me to find you and send you to his office."

Without a thought or noticing that he had moved, James was on his feet. "Is that all he said?" he demanded. Lily nodded. She was suddenly looking more panicky.

As James ran to his bedroom to change back into his daytime clothes, Lily said, "This isn't a school thing, is it?"

"I don't think so," James shouted back as he pulled on a pair of jeans.

"What...what could it...I'm coming with you!" Lily jumped to her feet as James came hopping out of his bedroom on one foot, pulling a shoe onto his other.

"No, Lily," James said sternly. "Stay in the tower. Don't go anywhere until I come back."

"James-"

"Don't fight me on this, Lily. Stay here."

Lily whipped out her wand and pointed it at James before he could so much as blink. "Expelliarimus!" James dove for his own wand as it flew toward Lily. "I'm going with you or you're going without a wand," she said matter-of-factly.

James groaned, "You're wasting valuable time." Lily raised her eyebrows. "Fine," he said angrilly. "Come. And give that back."

Lily tossed James' wand to him as she passed him on her way out of the common room. "I hope you can run fast," James said after a moment. He took off, using shortcuts and secret passages to get to Dumbledore's office. To his surprise, Lily was keeping up with ease.

When, two and a half minutes later, they skidded to a halt, they were both severely winded. "Sugar Quill," James gasped to the gargoyle. It leapt aside, revealing the staircase that lead to Dumbledore's office. James took the stairs two at a time, not even pausing to knock on the office door.

When he finally stopped in front of Dumbledore's desk, he was clutching a stitch in his side. "Pr...profess...or," he panted. "Lil...y...is be...hind...me."

Dumbledore pointed his wand at James who instantly felt better. He was no longer gasping for air. "Thanks, Professor. Lily is-"

"Right here."

James turned and Dumbledore looked over his head. "Ah, Miss Evans," said the headmaster. "I should have known you would not be able to sit aside." He turned back to James. "Mr. Black and Mr. Pettigrew have joined us," he said. "They are currently working to secure the passageways in and out of the castle."

"What's going on?" both James and Lily demanded.

"Joseph Lupin has been captured. I believe he is alive, but I know that he has been tortured. If and when Voldemort learns that the Order, that I am behind this anti-Voldemort movement... I fear that it may occur to him to attemt to take Hogwarts."

"I'm confused... What is 'the Order?'" asked Lily.

"I'll explain later," James said quickly. "I need to help them with-"

"No," said Dumbledore, holding up a hand. "You must fetch Mrs. Lupin. Bring her back to Hogwarts. They will be looking for her." James nodded quickly. "Take this Floo Powder. Floo to the Hogshead Inn and apparate from there."

Dumbledore handed James a full bag of green powder. "Does Remus know?" he asked.

"He was already gone," said Dumbledore.

James nodded. As he stepped toward the fireplace, Dumbledore began to instruct Lily on what charms he wanted put in place around the grounds.

"Hogshead Inn!" James shouted after the flames turned green. He stepped into the fire. The dizzying journey was short. James was expelled from the fireplace in the upstairs office of the inn and fell hard.

"Oy! Who're you?"

James looked around as he brushed ash off of his jeans. His eyes found the barman and owner of the inn.

"Oh, it's you, Potter," said Aberforth Dumbledore. "What can I get for you? Butterbeers? Firewhiskey?"

"No," said James hurriedly. "I need to get to the Lupins' house. I'll be back in no more than fifteen minutes. Can you keep the fire going?"

"Sure thing, Potter. Don't get caught or you'll end up expelled."

James spared a nod before turning on the spot to disapparate.

He materialized under the tree that was just outside of the security enchantments that Remus' father had placed on the family's home. James hoped that it had been enough to keep Mrs. Lupin safe thus far. Without a thought, James transformed into Prongs. He set off at a gallop in the direction of the house.

He transformed back into James as he approached the house, never breaking his stride. A light was flickering in the kitchen. James stopped at the window to peer in, an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach.

Mrs. Lupin was bound to a chair facing the window that James was looking into. A hooded and cloaked Death Eater was shouting at her. James spotted Veritiserum on the counter and his breath caught in his chest. He wasn't sure how much Mrs. Lupin knew, but he knew that either way, she had little time left. Her eyes widened and James realized that they had found him. He pressed a finger to his lips.

As her captor was turned, Mrs. Lupin shook her head frantically. James put the finger to his lips again and backed out of sight. He crept around the perimeter of the house keeping to the shadows. He knew the Death Eater would have some form of backup. There was only one other Death Eater. He was standing guard at the front door.

James bit his lip. If he made too much noise, there was a chance that the other one would just kill Mrs. Lupin. How do I do this...how do I do this...

James took a deep breath to steady himself. There was no time for indecision. He just needed to be quicker than the Death Eater, and he had the advantage of surprise on his side.

James pointed his wand, aiming very carefully. "Petrificus totalis," he said quietly. The Death Eater went rigid and began to fall. "Levicorpus!" James made the petrified man float nearer to him. "Libericorpus." He hurried over to the Death Eater and pulled off his mask. He recognized a man called Walden MacNair. He had graduated Hogwarts when James was in his second year.

Leaving MacNair petrified on the ground, James crept quietly up to the house.

The door was already open, so all James needed to worry about was the squeaky porch step. As he moved into the house, his wand at the ready, he heard the Death Eater in the kitchen shout, "CRUCIO!"

Mrs. Lupin's screams ripped through him. All thoughts of a quiet attack were gone from him. James burst through the kitchen door, wand raised, and disarmed the Death Eater. James caught the wand of his opponent with ease as he shouted, "Petrificus totalis!"

As the Death Eater fell, James rushed over and untied Mrs. Lupin. "What are you doing here, James?" she demanded as James pulled her to her feet. "You could have been killed!"

"Later," James said with urgency. He pushed her toward the door. "Go and pack whatever you can in the next three minutes. We have to get out of here."

"But-"

"Go! There isn't much time!"

Mrs. Lupin looked confused and frightened. She scrambled toward the stairs. James, meanwhile, frisked the Death Eater. He found Mrs. Lupin's wand. He pocketed it, along with the Death Eater's wand.

"Lets see who you really are," James muttered as he unmasked the second Death Eater. "Bellatrix Black," he said disgustedly.

Before James had time to do anything else, Mrs. Lupin reappeared at the bottom of the stairs. James left his best friend's cousin on the kitchen floor and joined Mrs. Lupin in the sitting room.

"I have your wand," he said, handing it to her.

"Where are we going? And why are these people here?"

"Not here," said James, leading the way, wand raised, out to the yard. "The Death Eaters are petrified, they can still hear us... We have to get to the big tree to apparate."

When James landed once more in Aberforth's office, the fire, as requested, was still blazing. Aberforth, however, was nowhere to be seen. James dug in his pockets and pulled out the Floo Powder that Dumbledore had given him. He threw a handful of it into the fire and told Mrs. Lupin where to go.

When he himself stumbled into the headmaster's study, Lily and Sirius sat waiting for them. "Where's Peter?" James asked.

"Finishing up in the fourth floor bathroom," Sirius said, handing James the Marauder's Map. "Dumbledore is on his way up," he said to Mrs. Lupin.

"What's that thing?" Lily asked, looking at the old parchment that James was folding to fit into his pocket.

"Nothing," said James. "Your cousin is a Death Eater now, Padfoot. Bellatrix..."

"Doesn't surprise me," Sirius shrugged. "She's deranged."

"What is going on here?!" Mrs. Lupin seemed to have finally lost it. "Why did you come for me tonight, James? How did you know I was in trouble?"

"Mr. Potter did so on my orders, Alice." Dumbledore had arrived, McGonagall on his heels. He walked to his seat behind the desk and motioned everyone to claim a seat.

"What is going on? Tell me, Albus, please."

"Alice," Dumbledore began heavily. James' stomach sank at the old man's tone. The tone said it all, he did not need to go on...but he did. "Joseph has been murdered by followers of Voldemort. We found him...we... We were just too late."

James felt the tears slip down his cheeks before he realized that he was crying.

"Can you three give us a moment?" Mrs. Lupin said. James could tell that she did not want them to see her as she was about to be. He, Sirius and Lily stood.

"The wands of Walden MacNair and Bellatrix Black," James said, placing them on Dumbledore's desk. "They were the ones that were there tonight."

With that, James followed Sirius and Lily. Halfway down the steps, they met Peter. "What happened?" he asked upon seeing their faces.

"They killed Remus' dad, Worm," Sirius said, putting an arm around Peter so that he would fall into step with them. Peter said nothing.

"Do you guys want to come to our common room tonight?" Lily offered. "I don't think any of us will get much sleep tonight...especially if an attack may come."

"It makes sense to stick together," Sirius agreed. "We would need to organize...yeah."

"We'll go get snacks from the kitchens," Peter offered, motioning to himself and Sirius. "A few butterbeers, maybe?"

"I've got some firewhiskey," James supplied. "Calm our nerves..." Peter nodded. "We'll see you guys in a few, then."

Peter and Sirius headed for their well-known shortcut to the kitchens. Lily snaked an arm around James' waist in order to make it easier to rest her head on his shoulder as they walked. James' stomach flip-flopped. "Are you alright?" he asked after a moment, once he was positive that his voice wouldn't shake.

"I was worried about you," Lily admitted. "But you're good...two Death Eaters...wow." James shrugged with the shoulder that Lily's head was not resting on. They continued through the corridors slowly and quietly, making their way to their tower.

"Hey, James?" Lily said finally.

"Hmm?"

"What are your thoughts on...on love?"

James bit his lip, unsure of where this conversation was going. "Well," he began. "I don't think..." He sighed heavily and started over. "One can't fall in love in a world so dark," he said quietly. "A world where a lunatic wants to wipe out muggles and muggleborns-and is-and makes kids murder their own families...kills children and kills parents so children are left to grieve prematurely. He tortures women who he knows won't have any useful information to him just because their husbands are fighting... A world like this is no place for love, no place to get married and start a family."

James trailed off slowly. He sighed and pulled his arm up to wrap it around Lily's shoulders. She squeezed him. "Friendship is a type of love," she pointed out.

"Yeah," James agreed. "It just means we're all going to hurt a lot more before this is over."

"I don't know about that," Lily said. "I feel safe right now."

"Well, I reckon Hogwarts is the safest lace to be right now."

"I think you're the one who makes me feel safe, actually," Lily said quietly. She was watching their feet when James cast her a sideways glance.

"That's probably because I'd die to protect you," he admitted quietly. They both turned red. Neither dared to look at the other.

"Do you think anyone could ever change your mind about love?"

"Probably...but I won't act on it when it happens," James said, sounding sure of himself. "I can't. Chances are I'm not going to survive this war."

"Don't say that."

"It's true, though," said James. "I'm going to fight...I am fighting. I'm never going to stop fighting, Lily. The chance that I'll make it through are slim."

"Well then shouldn't you let love in while you have the chance?" Lily demanded. "A life lived without love is not a life lived fully!"

James was silent. The cogs were turning in his imagination. A scene quickly formed...he and Lily laying on a blanket near the lake. She lay, head resting on his chest, snuggled next to him. He kisses her hair and she squeezes him.

The scene vanished as they reached the common room. Lily hesitated for a moment before stepping away from James. She gave the password and went in. James followed, shoving his hands into his pockets as he did so. "I won the argument," Lily announced, dropping onto the couch. James shrugged. She patted the spot next to her.

James sat on the opposite end of the couch. His heart was pounding, he wanted to get it under control. Lily sighed quietly and scooted over until she was touching him again. She replaced her head onto his shoulder and took his right hand in both of hers. She began to lightly trace the lines of his palm with her fingers. "You said you would tell me what the Order is."

And so he did, the entire time noticing how loud his heart was sounding. He didn't take his eyes off of their hands as he spoke. When he was done, she stopped tracing his palm. "I'm joining," she said solemnly.

"Lily-"

"I can't not join, James."

"Agreed," said James, just as solemnly. "I was going to ask you a question."

"Oh, what is it?" She continued her tracing of his palm lines.

"At this time last year, you wouldn't speak a single word to me-save yelling at me-and now...I'm not sure what's happening right now..."

Lily sighed. "You were such an immature little...little shit, James," she said seriously. "No matter how I felt, I was ultimately annoyed by your behavior. I feel like you're the same person now, but just...mature. You aren't running around pulling practical jokes constantly, picking on other people for no good reason. You can have a conversation with me without begging me to date you. That was the worst part..."

James gave a dry chuckle. "I guess I can understand that," he said. "But...what is this? What are we right now?"

"I don't know," Lily said, shrugging. "Does it matter? After all, I've heard there's no place for love in a world so dark." James laughed as she threw his own words back at him. "We're friends right now, I'd say," she went on. "Really close friends, even."

"I can live with that," James said quietly. He laced his fingers through hers and squeezed her hand. She smiled.

They all stayed awake through the night waiting for an attack that didn't come. Lily had fallen asleep around five o'clock in the morning. James had scooped her up and carried her to her bed at that point. As the sun began to rise, Peter stretched and yawned. Sirius stood and walked over to the window.

"There goes Madame Pomfrey," he noted. The mediwitch was in the midst of freezing the Whomping Willow to fetch Remus. "What do we say to him?" Sirius suddenly asked.

James bit his lip. "I have no idea," he said finally. "We just have to be there for him. There's nothing to say, really."

Sirius sighed. "C'mon, Pete," he muttered. "Let's go get changed. Meet you up at the Hospital Wing in twenty minutes?"

"His mom will be there," James said quietly. "We should wait...let them..." He trailed off, sighing. "We should go after lunch."

"In that case," Sirius said as he stretched, "I'm going to try for a few hours of sleep. See you at lunch."

"Me too," said Peter. "Bye, Prongs."

As the other two left the tower, James yawned and stretched out on the couch. Before he knew it, he was asleep.

His dreams were troubled. Memories of finding Mrs. Lupin being tortured, his own mother taking her place, his inability to save his own parents, his inability to save himself...to save Lily...

He was trapped in a dungeon of some sort. He was shivering, cold and scared. His wand lay in the corner in three pieces. There were no doors, no windows... The only light came from a single candle that was about to burn out. So cold...

"James!" he head. His head snapped up. How could she get into this room? No doors...no windows... "James!"

He was losing his mind. He was alone. He would always be alone.

"James!"

James awoke and sat bolt upright. He was in a cold sweat and he was sobbing. Lily was on her knees next to the couch. She had been trying to wake him up. Worry lined her pretty face. "It's okay, James," she said carefully. "It was only a dream. Shh..." She began to rub his back slowly.

"What...happened?"

"I woke up and you were yelling," said Lily. "Then you suddenly went quiet and started shaking like mad...and you started crying..."

"I'm sorry," James muttered, wiping tears and sweat from his face with the back of his hand.

"You don't have to apologize," Lily said. "This is...this is all a lot to deal with."

James nodded. He checked his watch. "It's almost lunch time," he noted. "I told the guys we'd meet and then go see Remus."

"I have to go and see Dumbledore, myself."

James stood and turned to walk to his bedroom. When he reached the door, his hand on the knob, he rested his forehead upon the cool wood. "I don't know what I'm going to say to him."

"Well...what, er...what did you want to hear when your p-...when you were in his shoes?" Lily asked tentatively.

"Nothing," James said quietly. "I locked myself away for weeks. There's nothing anyone can say..."

"Just be there for him. If that's all you can do, do it well."

By the time James had dressed and composed himself, Lily was gone to her meeting with the headmaster. Checking that he had his wand and the Marauder's Map, just in case, James left the tower and headed for the Great Hall.

Despite not having eaten since the snacks the evening before, neither James or Sirius was hungry. Peter made himself two roast beef sandwiches to take with them in the way up to the Infirmary.

Upon their arrival, they spotted Lily coming out of the Hospital Wing. She was wearing a look of great distress. When she saw them, she rushed toward them, her hair flying behind her.

"What are you doing up here?" Sirius asked. "James said you were in a meeting with-"

"Remus is gone."