A/N Hello there! Betcha didn't expect this so late? Well, at least it's here now as exams are finally over. SMILES! I'm having quite a lot of fun writing little interludes of new characters – you'll see two in this chapter as Nick learns more about Sara's past. It's a nice long chapter too!
Thank you for taking the time to review. Every word that comes my way plays a part in the posting of the next chapter. I heart you all, dear reviewers.
The song used in this chapter is called Something for the Pain by Bon Jovi. If there's any possibility of you getting hold of it, I advise you to. It's really a great song – and also so applicable to Sara's life. Seriously, give it a listen.
C: 8
BANG!
Nick jerked awake at the sound, hastily casting his sleep-filled eyes around the room. For a moment, he panicked, wondering where he was but the sound of a soft sigh from beside him brought back his memory. Sara was still asleep beside him, her lips parted and her breathing peaceful.
BANG!
Nick's eyes darted around the room, seeking the source of the thumping.
"Miss Sidle! Oh Miss Sidle!" a shrill voice screeched. The words were followed with more banging. "Sara Sidle! I know you're in there!"
Sara groaned and rolled over, keeping her eyes closed but frowning. "Please. Not her," she whined.
Nick opened his mouth to ask who 'her' was but the shrill voice persisted, along with the loud thumping on what Nick gathered was the front door.
"Sara!" the voice shrieked, "I saw you sneaking in with all those men last night! Open this door!"
BANG!
"God! Who in the Hell is that?" Nick asked, incredulity in his voice.
"Mrs. Maitland," Sara groaned, rolling over to open her eyes. "My nosey neighbour." She tossed back the covers irately and made to get up when suddenly a sharp pain shot through her head.
"Argh," Sara's hand went to her forehead and she dropped back onto the bed. "My head," she winced. Nick put his hand on her shoulder and coaxed her to lie down again. He pulled the covers back up over them. "Leave it, honey," he said gently. "She'll have to go eventually."
Another bang sounded followed by a harsh, "Sara Louise Sidle!"
BANG!
Sara squinted in pain and rubbed her forehead furiously, trying to ease the pain. Noise like that did nothing for a headache. Nick noticed the movement and felt anger rise in his chest.
"That's it!" he said angrily. Sara watched with wide eyes as he marched from the room.
"Sara-"
"Can I help you?" Nick demanded, ripping the door open. The Mrs. Maitland that stood before him was a stocky, wrinkled woman – rather matronly looking. She had bulging snooker-ball eyes, a thin, hooked nose and small whiskers sprouted from a mole on her chin. Some of her hair was pulled in to a bun but most of it stuck out in wild tufts. At the unexpected sight of Nick she drew back a little.
"I'm looking for Sara Sidle," she said primly, pursing her lips. "And… you are?"
Nick put on an overly cheerful smile and held out his hand, "Nick Stokes, ma'am."
She frowned with disdain at his hand then leaned up on her toes, straining to see past him into the apartment. "One of many, I'm sure," she muttered.
Nick frowned, "Is there something that I can help you with?"
"I want to talk to Sara – the girl you were…uh… with last night."
Nick's hand clenched into a fist at the woman's presumptuousness but he kept his cool. "I'm sorry but Sara's not well. She's sleeping."
"Hangover, no doubt."
That, Nick couldn't let slide.
"Hey!" he snapped, "Sara's sick. From working too hard and not getting any sleep because of your hellish electrical repairs."
The woman looked wholly insulted and stood with her mouth open at his outburst. She frowned and pursed her lips. After a moment's consideration, a sugary – and completely false – smile contorted her face.
"Well, forgive me," she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm, "But she leaves here in the middle of the night and most of the time, doesn't come back until at least midday. What is an upstanding citizen supposed to think about a pretty girl like her, spending her nights on the town? And then last night, coming home with three of you?"
"Perhaps a so-called upstanding citizen would realise that it really is none of her business? Sara doesn't have to report everything she does to you."
"I'm the president of this building's security association. It's my duty to know what the people who live here are up to," She said firmly.
"Then listen up Mrs Maitland." Nick said firmly," because you've got it all wrong. The three of us you saw last night? We're Sara's colleagues. We all work with the Las Vegas Crime Lab. Sara's a CSI! We work night shift so when she leaves late at night, she's going to work – with the police."
Mrs Maitland's eye bulged in shock but her frown returned quickly, "How do I know you're not lying to cover up illicit activities?" She scanned Nick's boxers and T-shirt with a beady eye, "You certainly aren't dressed like a colleague. And if what you said is true, you should be at work now."
"Look," Nick said, "Sara collapsed at the lab last night. My supervisor gave us the night off so I could bring her home."
"And what about my proof? I'm not head of the security association for nothing, my boy. I saw how dolled up she was last night."
Nick sighed and cast his eyes back into Sara's apartment, looking for some sign of her being a CSI. He spotted her department ID on the kitchen counter and reached for it.
"Here," he held it up for the old woman to inspect. At that second, a loud retching cough came from Sara's bedroom and he saw the old woman's firm resolve of suspicion crumble. An embarrassed blush flushed her cheeks.
"Heavens," she said softly. "I am sorry. If she'd just said something."
"Yeah. But she shouldn't have had to," Nick nodded, feeling more than a little satisfaction at her embarrassment. By the sounds of things – their rude awakening included – she'd been harassing Sara quite a bit.
"Sara's going to need rest," he said.
Mrs Maitland's guilt made her nod furiously in agreement but her eyes shone with the plans already brewing in her head, "An LVPD officer. In my building," she smiled.
Nick ignored her. "She'd been overworking and she was attacked yesterday at a crime scene. I know she hasn't been getting much sleep at home."
The old woman's blush deepened, "Our wiring was faulty."
"I trust the problem has been fixed?" Nick asked, sounding more and more like a teacher chiding a naughty child.
"Yes- yes! It was fixed last night."
"Good," Nick put his hand on the door. "It was nice meeting you, Mrs Maitland."
"Indeed." She paused and looked up at him from underneath a heavy blush. "And tell Sara… I'm sorry."
"Sure. Goodbye." Nick shut the door and smiled to himself. No doubt, Sara was finally going to be able to get some real rest – and probably the respect she deserved – from now on.
When Nick entered the bedroom again, Sara was lying on her back, watching him closely.
"How did you get rid of her? That was record timing," She asked.
Nick shrugged and sat down beside her. "I set her straight. Told her the truth about you."
Sara frowned. "I shouldn't have to expose my life to her because she's too damn presumptuous to ask why I go out at night."
"Sara, I didn't expose your life. I just told her that you're a CSI and that you work nights. That's all," Nick insisted.
A smile slowly spread across her face, "Really?"
"Yeah – and I chewed her out about the repairs a bit. From now on you're gonna be getting a whole lot more respect around here," Nick added.
"Aaw!" Sara said, making a dive for his middle and wrapping her arms around him. "Thank you." She released him and looked into his eyes. "That was very chivalrous of you. Nobody's stood up for me like that in a long time. Playing my white knight?"
"Oh honey," Nick said, pulling her to him. "For a pretty princess like you, I'll stand up to a thousand Mrs Maitlands."
Sara let out a giggle at the thought but soon found Nick's lips pressed against her own. The kiss was intense, sending tiny sparks of heat rushing along her arms. Sara moaned happily and found herself leaning into Nick, seeking more. Nick's arms went around her back, pulling her onto his lap as he sought to deepen the kiss. His hand dropped to rest on her thigh, making Sara suddenly aware of the shortness of her pyjama shorts. Her heart began to race, and her hands found their way into his hair. Dizzied by the sensations racing through them, Sara allowed herself to tumble backwards, taking Nick with her. But when her head struck the mattress, a red-hot pain raced across her skull, jolting her back to reality.
"Aah," Sara cried out, wincing.
"Sara?" Nick asked, quickly moving off her, "Did I hurt you?"
"No," Sara said softly, "Just my head again."
Nick sighed, "Can I get you something? Paracetamol?"
"They're in the drawer next to the bed," Sara said, blinking miserably at the loss of what could have been a most delicious encounter. The interruption was just another rude reminder of that state that her body really was in. It made her angry. She hated feeling weak. The instincts that she'd developed as a child screamed that it was dangerous, too.
"Here you go," Nick handed her two white tablets and a bottle of water that had been standing on the bedside table.
"Thanks," Sara sat up slowly and took the pills. Nick watched her for a few seconds until a low grumble interrupted his thoughts.
"Sorry," Sara said, blushing.
"You hungry?" Nick smiled and raised an eyebrow at her.
"And cold too," Sara noted, rubbing her arms.
"Yeah, it looks pretty cold outside," Nick said, going to open the bedroom curtain. The day outside was misty and cold with moody clouds covering the sky. Another miserable day. "Why don't you take a shower and I'll rustle up some breakfast?"
"You know, I think I'll do just that," Sara smiled.
A few minutes later, she disappeared into the bathroom. Nick returned to the living room. A look at the clock told him it was 8:30 am: time for breakfast, or what was usually dinner for him. He knew there was nothing in the house and so, guessed that if they didn't want peanut butter toast again, he'd have to go out. Nick pulled on a pair of sweat pants, increasingly grateful that he'd stopped to pick up clothes at his place the night before, and went to pull open the curtains.
Turning away, Nick let his eyes wonder over Sara's apartment. It looked different in the day. More open. The phone rang suddenly and Nick's eyes darted to the bedroom door, wondering if Sara would hear it. Almost immediately, the answering machine switched on.
"Hey! It's Sara. I'm not in – you know the drill." The machine beeped.
"Hey Dollface! It's Andy – I know you're at work, working your ass off – or at least checking out that Texan you rave about all the time - but this is the only time I can call. Listen, our DA's gonna try get hold of you sometime today. It's…about Laura. But before you freak out, I got something to make you smile so listen up. Remember this: "
In the background, there was a click then a burst of rock music and two voices singing loudly. Nick recognised the first one immediately. It was Sara. The other one sounded like this Andy guy.
"Loneliness has found a home in me,
My suitcase and guitar are my only family.
I've tried to need someone like I needed me
Well I opened up my heart but all I did was bleed,
I don't need no lover just to get screwed
They don't make no band-aid that's gonna cover my bruise…
C'mon C'mon C'mon…
Gimme something for the pain
Gimme something for the blues
Gimme something for the pain
When I feel I'm hanging on a hangman's noose.
Gimme something for the rain
Gimme something I can use
To get me through the night, make me feel alright
Something like you
C'mon C'mon C'mon…"
The music stopped suddenly and Andy spoke again, "Call me Sara Lou."
The line went dead and Nick was left feeling thoroughly confused. Questions raced through his mind. Who was this guy? He obviously knew Sara well. Too well? Nick thought, wondering just what exactly their relationship was. He knew the song well: he liked to listen to it when things got too overwhelming and he needed a release. To hear Sara singing along to it with so much passion was both exciting and worrying. Exciting, because it was yet another thing they had in common (plus she really did have a good voice) but worrying because her voice was filled with pain.
Nick frowned, deciding to ask Sara about it as soon as they'd finished breakfast. He pulled on his shoes and grabbed his wallet, heading for the door.
xxx
Sara took her time in the shower, savouring the feel of the warm water on her shoulders. It was so comforting, gently numbing all the aches and pains in her body. She soon found herself leaning with her forehead against the cold tiles, letting the water wash over her. She'd slept more deeply in Nick's arms than she had in the last two years and, while her mind felt better already, her body was still screaming for rest.
Sara wasn't sure how long she stood there, letting the warm water wash away her weariness. When she finally did pull herself from the water's seductive lure, she heard the front door slam and hurried to dry off her hair and put on clean underwear under her yellow pyjamas.
Emerging from the bathroom, she found Nick in the kitchen, standing in front of the stove holding a spatula.
"Hey gorgeous," He said, holding out an arm to her. Smiling, Sara moved into it, happy for the hug.
"Mmm, smells gorgeous," Sara said, sniffing the air. "Is that an omelette?"
"It sure is," Nick said proudly. "And before you ask, no, I didn't make it outta peanut butter, bread and the expired tub of yoghurt in your fridge. There's a store two blocks down the road. I went for a jog."
"You ran to the store, just so you could make breakfast for me?" Sara asked.
"Sure did," Nick said. "Oh, and I made this for you too." He leaned over to the other counter and handed her a fresh hot water bottle.
"Thanks," Sara gratefully accepted the bottle and sat down on the nearest bar chair, leaning with her elbows on the counter. Her eyes fell on the answering machine and its flashing red button. "Did someone call?"
"Yeah," Nick paused, unsure of what to say. He'd wanted to wait a while before broaching the subject with Sara, but if she was asking, he guessed he could only be honest. "It…uh… went straight to the answering machine."
Sara leaned over and pushed the play button, expecting another message from Grissom. Nick couldn't help but watch her carefully over his shoulder as she listened to the message. At Andy's voice, a warm smile spread over her face. She even chuckled a little at his remark about 'that Texan' and flashed her eyes at Nick. But when the words, 'it's about Laura' filled her ears, Sara's smile faded into a anxious expression. The light in her eyes seemed to die until the song came on. As it slowly played through, Nick saw a number of emotions flit across her face. Recognition; nostalgia; pain; mischief: the twisted pleasures of the bittersweet.
"Call me Sara Lou", the machine finished and beeped.
Sara sat, dead quiet, her eyes staring at the machine in front of her. Slowly a small smile managed to work its way across her features.
"Sara?" Nick asked from his position in front of the stove. "Who was that?"
Sara sighed, "That, was on old friend from San Francisco. Andrew Metzler."
"You okay?" Nick asked, frowning at her.
"Yeah."
"You look a little shaken."
"I'm fine," Sara insisted, showing Nick to leave it alone. After a few moments of silence, however, Nick decided to continue the topic.
"Sounds like a nice guy? How long have you known him?" He said, trying to make it sound like a casual question.
"Since I was seven," Sara said, keeping her tone cool. She'd recognised Nick's tone immediately and knew exactly what he was asking. "And no, Nicky, he's no competition for you. We're just friends. We've seen a lot of battles together." She leaned back and pointed to a photo of two young children stuck on the fridge. "That's him on the right."
Nick smiled, relieved, and asked, "Cute! Is he also a CSI?"
"Close: a detective," Sara said. "I worked with him on some cases back in Frisco."
"That's a nice singing voice he's got there," Nick commented, opening the cupboard in front of him in search of a plate. Yours is pretty good too."
"In the cupboard to your right," Sara said, pointing. She sighed before answering his comment, "Yeah, I can believe he has a recording of that."
"Pretty angsty stuff – great rock – but angsty nonetheless," Nick said, pulling out two plates and setting them on the counter.
"Like I said, I saw a lot a drama with Andy," Sara said.
"So who's Laura?" Nick asked.
A loud squelch sounded as the hot water bottle slipped from Sara's frozen fingers. Nick turned around to find Sara motionless, her mouth half open but without words. Pain flashed in her eyes and she drew a haggard breath. Suddenly realising how obvious she was being, Sara bent down to pick up the bottle.
"Uh…just somebody from San Francisco," she said shakily.
"Sara?" Nick frowned at her, turning away from the plates. "You okay..?"
"Yeah," Sara said, visibly sucking up her strength and nodding. Nick's fingers found hers.
"Sara, you're shaking." Nick said softly, his eyes searching hers.
"Nick, I don't know what to say to you," she said, her eyes screaming for comfort. Inside, Sara was cursing herself. Normally she'd have a better handle on her emotions but the past few weeks appeared to have weakened more than her body.
"How about just telling me how you know her?" Nick asked softly.
Sara sniffed, "Her name's Laura – as in Laura Sidle. She's my mother."
"Is she sick?" Nick asked, immediately guessing at what could have upset Sara.
"God, I wish," Sara replied miserably. She looked Nick in the eye. "I really didn't want to tell you this. Not so soon."
"Then I'll wait-"
Sara shook her head, "That's not fair to you, Nick. You've done so much for me, you deserve to know. I just… don't want this to change things between us."
"Sara, I'm as much your friend as your boyfriend. I've known you for close on six years. I won't bail on you," Nick gave her a reassuring smile.
Sara sighed and nodded. "My mother isn't sick. She's in jail because she killed my father. I met Andy in foster care. My first foster home lasted a week. The guy tried to commit suicide and social services moved me the very next day. The second lasted a month. It wasn't too bad until the guy started beating his wife one night. It was too much like my parents. I ran away."
Sara paused to let the news settle before continuing, "Andy was with me at my next home. We were together for almost three years. Life was pretty good. He's only a year older than me: ended up in foster care after his mother ran out on them and his dad was killed in a B&E. We looked after each other. We went through everything together and when our foster mother died in a car accident and we were split up, we stayed in touch. We'd meet each other after school, sneak out at night to lie on the grass in the park and talk about life. We'd talk about what had happened to other foster kids: abuse, starvation- rape. It terrified us but we stayed strong together. Whenever something bad happened to one of us, the other would always be there to ease the pain. When we finished High School, he joined the force and I went to Harvard."
"Sara-"
"The song that you heard us singing? That was a couple years ago. You remember when I took some time off?"
Nick nodded.
"I went back to Frisco for a week. They were thinking of releasing my mother and wanted me to testify – in her favour. I went back there, said exactly what I saw her do and spent the rest of my time with Andy. Didn't even see her. Recalling the whole thing shook me up so Andy took me out one night and we ended up singing that song. He'd just lost his partner in a drug bust gone wrong so we both felt pretty weighed down by things. It was a great release."
"But, don't you ever want to talk to your mother?" Nick asked, his mind heavy with questions and fraught with horror. Sara had watched her mother kill her father.
Sara cast her eyes down to her feet. "Nick, when I was thirteen, I got a chance. I ended up in the best foster home ever. My 'mother' was an older woman, single, new at foster parenting so the state only let her take care of one kid. That was me. She was like a real parent – not like the cruel foster parents I'd seen in the past. I daresay she loved me for my geekiness – she was a writer for a science magazine –, treated me like her own daughter and, after a few months, she requested adoption." Sara paused, gathering her strength. "My mother refused." Sara's voice broke. "She refused to sign the fucking papers to save me!"
Tears flowed freely from Sara's eyes and sobs caught in her throat. Nick pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her. God, she hadn't been lying when she said she'd seen a couple battles.
"Shh," He whispered to her, offering comfort. "God, Sara. I'm so sorry."
When Sara's body stopped shaking and she calmed down, she sniffed and looked at him. "I don't need sympathy, Nick. That was years ago. Things are different now. I was one of the lucky ones who got out of the system unscathed." Sara was surprising herself. She hadn't come close to being able to disclose her past as easily to Grissom. Still, something about Nick made her comfortable, eased her pain and made her less ashamed of her tears.
"So, Andy's phone call now means…?"
"That they're probably looking at releasing her a few years early again." Sara finished. She pulled back from his arms and swatted her tears away. She walked over to the plates and smiled, "We'd better eat these. They're getting cold."
Amazed at how fast she'd changed the topic, Nick turned around with confusion written across his face. "Sara…?"
She smiled bittersweetly and shrugged, "I know what you're thinking Nick. It's been a crazy life, but I've dealt with it. And I'm fine. Andy's call just came at a really bad time."
Nick suddenly realised just how strong Sara was. He knew that he would have cracked, had he seen the horror that she had. His mind was brimming with questions but for now, he understood her need to just get on with life. To dwell was to fester.
"Well," he said, getting up to put the kettle on for coffee. "You don't have to deal with it alone anymore. Coffee?"
Sara's face lit up at the possibility and finally, they moved on from the pain of the last few moments, accepting what had been exposed and moving on to what was going to be a most scrumptious breakfast.
A/N Well, yet again, my story has run away with me. I seem to really be getting bogged down in angst lately. Strange. Anyway, despite the high-drama, let me know what you thought – pretty please (with snickers on top?)!
I'm going away until the 12th with no possibility of posting but fear not I shall be back to update ASAP as chapter 9 is half way!