Disclaimer: I'm living off a student loan. There's no way I own something as awesome as Naruto.
--
The Akatsuki base was a confusing series of hallways that made literally no sense. If Sakura ever found the architect, she swore she'd kill him.
After what seemed like an age (but in reality was more like two minutes), they finally reached the kitchen.
"Isn't there a shorter way?" Sakura whined, reminding Kakuzu with a shudder of his partner.
"Yes, but I thought I'd take you on a tiki-tour," he teased her. "Besides, we can't have you knowing your way around just yet. Just because I think you're cute doesn't mean I trust you."
"But it's not a real tour unless you point out the nearest exits," the pinkette prodded him. "You know, in case of fire."
"If it was a real tour, I'd also charge you for it," Kakuzu grinned widely, enjoying the playful banter. "And if there was a fire, we'd just have Kisame flood the place."
"Kisame's here? He's Itachi's partner, isn't he?" Sakura muttered, mainly to herself.
"That's right. You haven't met them before?" the bounty hunter asked. "They've had several run ins with Konoha."
"I'm the only member of my team that hasn't met them. I was being trained by Tsunade at the time," Sakura answered. "I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing."
"It's probably a good thing," the older man answered, giving her a sideways look, as he led her over to the fridge. "Why would you think otherwise?"
"It might have made me stronger," she sighed, and looked away, a little embarrassed. "I still couldn't beat you, after all."
"No one else has, so far either," he reminded her, straightening up to look at her.
They just stared at each other for a while, before one of Kakuzu's earlier comments caught up with her.
"You think I'm cute?" Sakura asked him, a small smile playing at her lips.
Wishing like hell he'd picked up his mask before coming, Kakuzu spun around and buried his head in the fridge.
"Would you like eggs, rice, or a sandwich?" he asked quickly, damning the blush that engulfed his face as he heard her giggle.
"Hey, if you're gonna make it for me, I'll take whatevers on offer, Ragdoll," she grinned largely.
Inner Sakura, on the other hand, was having a minor (alright, major) meltdown.
'He has a crush on us!' she cried in mortification. 'An S-class criminal FREAK with stitches has a crush on us! Kill me now!'
'Shut up, Inner!' Sakura growled at herself. 'He could be our escape route! And he really isn't that bad, as far as criminals go.'
'But he's stingy.' Inner Sakura cried. 'And, and not Sasuke-kun.'
Sakura felt her insides freeze.
'Forget Sasuke,' she warned herself coldly. 'He left us. We promised ourselves yo get over him.'
'I'm sorry... I know. I just miss hi-WAH! Look alive! Ragdoll alert, 5 o'clock!'
Blinking, Sakura focused on the face in front of hers. Particularly a pair of green on red eyes, narrowed in a suspicious glare.
"You alright?" Kakuzu asked her, placing the back or his hand to her forehead, which was burning with embarrassment.
"Ye-yeah," she blushed. "J-just a headache is all."
"Then why are you burning up?" he asked bluntly.
Sakura started, realizing she'd mistaken his expression as a glare, when in reality it was... concern?
"Well..." she trailed off. "Maybe I'm embarrassed?"
"And why is that?" he asked quizically, removing his hand, but leaving his face within an inch of hers.
"Well, maybe it's because I tuned out, and when I tuned back in I have this guy right in my face?" she snapped, blush returning tenfold.
Kakuzu took a couple steps back, to give her some room, and smirked at her.
"How do you want your eggs?"
--
Kisame walked in on an interesting sight. For the first time ever, he witnessed Kakuzu – the Kakuzu – the one and only stingy 'money whore' (in Hidan's words) Kakuzu of the Akatsuki, who never shared anything – dishing out freshly cooked eggs on toast to a young pink haired girl.
"Do my eyes deceive me?" he asked dramatically, blinking a few times. "Kakuzu being nice."
Kakuzu shot him an annoyed glance, before sitting down next to their 'guest', and digging in to his own eggs on toast.
"You must be Hoshigaki Kisame," Sakura nodded to him in greeting, her mouth twitching up at the corners.
"How could you tell?" he grinned, and sat down opposite them. "And you're Haruno Sakura. I didn't expect you to be so calm." At this, he tilted his head in curiosity. "I heard you had a temper."
"Would you rather I started punching holes in the walls?" she asked sarcastically.
"Please don't," Kakuzu paused his eating. "I don't want to have to work repairs into the budget."
Sakura giggled, and gave him a cheeky smile. "Then as a thank you for the food, I promise I'll try to avoid damaging anything while I'm here, just for you, Ragdoll."
"Ragdoll?" Kisame sniggered, making Kakuzu's eyebrow twitch.
"Got a problem, Gills?" Sakura asked innocently.
"We might do, if you keep calling me that," the ex-mist nin replied with a wide, sharp toothed grin.
"Intimidation doesn't work on this one," Kakuzu advised, giving her hand a squeeze under the table.
'What the hell was that?!'
Ignoring her inner voice, Sakura gave him a tight smile, and he let go of her hand.
"Really now?" Kisame continued the conversation, completely missing their discomfort. "Well, Sakura-chan, what do you think of Akatsuki so far?"
"I should have taken a vacation here years ago," she snapped, glaring at him.
"Hey, there's no need for that," Kisame held his hands up in defense. "I was just trying to make conversation."
Remembering something, Sakura locked eyes with the blue-skinned man.
"You were one of the Seven Swordsmen, right?" she asked, eying Samehada on his back.
"Ye-Yeah, what's it to you?" he asked, a little surprised at the question.
"I met Zabuza once. Years ago," she explained, eyes dimming with sadness. "I've always kind of wondered about the other six."
"Zabuza, huh? Haven't thought about him in years," Kisame stretched, scratching the back of his head. "Whatever happened to him?"
"He died an honorable death," Sakura stared at the remnants of her dinner. "I helped bury him and his companion, Haku in Wave Country."
"Haku, the Ice kid, right? Yeah, I remember him," Kisame sighed, watching her curiously. "How exactly did Zabuza die an honorable death? It doesn't really sound like the 'demon of the Mist' that I knew."
Sakura smiled at that, and re-told the story, play by play to her attentive audience of two.
--
When she had finished, both Kakuzu and Kisame were silent for a moment.
"I never would have imagined Zabuza-san to go out like that," the other swordsman sighed, leaning back in a stretch. "But it sure sounds like him. You're a good story teller, Haruno-san."
"I'd also be interested in how you took out Sasori," Kakuzu remarked, edging a little closer.
Sakura watched him warily.
"I think the two of you owe me a story," she raised an eyebrow at them. "Then maybe I'll tell you."
"That's right, you did take out Sasori, didn't you?" Kisame laughed, giving her a strange look. "You've got a habit of taking out my colleagues, now don't you?"
Sakura's eye twitched as she felt something brush her thy, and looked down to glare at the hand resting on it.
"This one might be next, unless he learns to keep his hands to himself," she growled, turning her glare to Kakuzu's face, which turned bright red.
"I don't know what you're talking about," he snapped, reclaiming his appendage. He folded his arms on top of the table (where they'd be visible to all), and looked stubbornly in the other direction.
Kisame's grin seemed to stretch to the width of his face, as he looked between the two.
"So, Sakura-chan," Kisame stressed the familiar term. "Would you like to hear about one of my battles?"
"Could you tell me more about the coup in Mist?" she begged. "I've only heard the really brief version."
All through his tale, Kisame flirted shamelessly with Sakura, just trying to get a rise out of Kakuzu (whose only response was a glare that intensified by the minute). Sakura, he had an odd feeling, was very aware of what was going on, and made no move to stop it. By the end of his story, his curiosity got the best of him.
"So, Sakura-chan," he gave her a charming smile. "You got any boyfriends back home?"
Sakura's eyes widened in alarm at this.
"What, are you all girl-starved or something?" she gave him an odd look. "Hidan asked me the same question."
"He did?" Kakuzu whipped his head around to give her an intense stare.
"Yeah, right before he asked me if I was a lesbian," she winced.
"So that's a 'no' to the boyfriend question then," Kisame nodded, then remembered something. "Is it because of that Sasuke-kid?"
"How would you like it if I started asking about your love life?" she hissed bitterly, eyes narrowing as the blue man snorted in amusement.
"How many dates do you think me or Kakuzu here get with faces like these?" he asked sarcastically.
Sakura suddenly felt awful. They'd likely never even had a girl look twice at them (which might explain Kakuzu's boundary issues – and it wasn't like he'd done anything really bad or anything). And here she was messing with them.
'That's what they get for kidnapping you against your will,' Inner Sakura reminded her, easing her guilt. 'Besides, they're S-class criminals, and grown men. They can handle it.'
'I guess,' she sighed mentally. 'Still, I want to show them kindness. What if they change, like Gaara.'
"What's that got to do with anything?" she asked with a frown. "Do you only try picking up shallow girls, or something?"
"There's not much of an opportunity to 'pick up chicks' when you're a missing nin," Kakuzu reminded her, with an amused smirk. "Perhaps we are 'girl starved', as you said earlier."
"How did we even get into this conversation?" Sakura whined, red faced. "Oh yeah, it was Kisame's fault." She glared at the blue skinned man, who just laughed.
Suddenly, the door burst open, and Hidan rushed in, holding a book, and plopped himself down next to Kisame, across from Sakura and Kakuzu.
"Hey Pinky! I found the answer to your question earlier," he grinned, flipping through the pages of his worn book, and slammed it down in front of her. "See? This is the Holy Book of Jashin. Read here."
"Chaos and destruction are what is pleasing to the Lord. Those whose existence is chaos, and who spread destruction, those who make sacrifices of blood in the name of Jashin will be given the blessing to make their chaos last forever," Sakura read, then looked up at the smirking Hidan.
"See, I knew it would be in there somewhere," the albino laughed loudly. "Do you want to convert now? You could even become my wife, and we'll f***ing serve Jashin together for the rest of eternity."
"Aren't religious men supposed to be celibate or something?" Kakuzu glared at his partner.
"What kind of a pansy religion are you thinking of?" Hidan spat back at him. "Jashinism is awesome, why would we go do something stupid like become celibate? I just need a good Jashinist woman. So, what do you say, Pinky?"
'Help!' Inner Sakura cried, staring in horror at the zealot, who was looking at her expectantly. 'And don't offend him! If he's immortal, he'll be hell to take down.'
"Hidan... just one more thing confuses me," she started sweetly. "Maybe you could clear this up, before I agree to run off and have little psychopathic children with you."
"Anything, babe. As away," Hidan grinned at the thought of an army of scythe wielding children.
"Well, the only way for there to be absolutely no chance of chaos, is if there was only one mind, or one will, right? Because then there'd be no potential for disagreement, or a clash of wills," Sakura spoke slowly, making sure he absorbed the point.
"...Yeah, I suppose so," he agreed, motioning for her to continue.
"So if there's two minds, there's the possibility or disagreement and the potential for chaos," she explained. "And if you added another mind, with a completely different world view, there'd be a higher chance of disagreement."
"Yeah," Hidan scratched his head. "Where are you going with this?"
"Well, if the more minds, or the more people you have, the higher the potential is to get chaos, then why would you kill anyone, thus bringing down the likelihood of anything chaotic happening? Chaos exists in life and unpredictability. Destruction is the exact opposite. How can both be pleasing to Jashin-sama, and how can you bring both chaos and destruction at the same time? Am I missing something? Because it doesn't make sense to me."
The room sunk into silence for a moment, while waiting for Hidan's response.
"... ... ...I'll get back to you on that," he answered, after a while, picking up his book and leaving quietly.
Both Kisame and Kakuzu stared at her for a while longer, before Kisame burst out laughing, and Kakuzu started to grin maliciously.
"Why did I never think of this earlier," the stitched man sniggered. "This is the longest he's ever stayed out of my hair."
"Well, there's a lot of it to get tangled in," Sakura teased mildly, giving him a small smile.
"I've never seen him that quiet," gaffawed Kisame. "Sakura, I hope you never leave."
The thought gave Sakura a pang in her heart, and she looked away sadly.
"You idiot," Kakuzu hissed at him.
"Hey, all I'm saying is I think you'd be a good addition to Akatsuki. We don't have a medic," he looked her up and down. "And Orochimaru's spot is still open, if you can get hold of his ring."
"I'm not joining Akatsuki! You want to kill my best friend!" she shouted, slamming her fist down on the table.
"Not necessarily kill," Kisame corrected her, leaning in closely. "Just extract the nine-tails. Your lot somehow brought the Kazekage back, right? Couldn't you do it for your foxy friend, too?"
"It takes a life to save a life, when you're that far gone," Sakura scowled. "A brilliant woman sacrificed her life to save Gaara, and I'm the only one left who knows how to do that particular technique. If Naruto was to live through that, I would die, and there'd be no way to be sure if he'd actually survive."
Kisame looked away awkwardly. He didn't know that.
"What are you even thinking, extracting the bijuu? They're sealed for a reason," she scowled.
"I know what the demons are like. In case you hadn't noticed, I've got the three tailed shark inside me," Kisame frowned back at her.
"Then why? Aren't they going to extract yours too?" she stared at him in disbelief.
Kisame scowled down at the table.
"Kisame," Sakura groaned in frustration. "Are you really going to give up your demon and your life to someone else? If someone somehow manages to actually gain control of them, it will mean a dictatorship of the entire world. Anyone who wants power in this way – it'll turn into a similar situation to Mist, the very kind of government you were trying to overthrow! And if they fail, and if the bijuu break loose, you know their power. It will be the end of the world."
Kisame's scowl intensified, and he refused to look at her.
"You're a very intelligent girl, Sakura-san," he told her, before standing up slowly. "If you ever get bored of your Ragdoll, come visit me."
He left with a wave over his shoulder, and closed the door behind him.
Sakura sighed, and looked to Kakuzu, who was just watching her quietly.
"You make interesting points," he spoke, after a while. "But one wonders how much is truth, and how much you're just stirring the pot."
"If you don't stir things every now and again, it starts to burn," she answered tiredly. "Everything needs to be questioned and tested before you give it your undying loyalty. Or it all just goes to crap."
"Come, it's getting late," Kakuzu offered her his hand, and she took it, reluctantly.
--
"Kakuzu..." Sakura spoke hesitantly, after they'd both gotten in their respective beds.
"What?" he answered her tiredly.
"I don't... What I'm saying is, I'm not trying to lead you on or anything," she half-lied. "I mean, I like you and all, but... Do you know what I'm trying to say?"
"I can honestly say," he replied, a little annoyed. "That I have absolutely no clue what you're on about."
Sakura sighed heavily.
"But I would like to know," he began again. "Why it is you snapped at me earlier, when I touched you. You didn't mind it before."
'Gah! How dense is he?!' Inner Sakura ranted. 'That's what you were just talking about!'
'He's a guy, Inner. We're going to have to spell it out for him,' she groaned mentally.
"Look, I like you, Kakuzu. But Akatsuki is Konoha's enemy. And while I don't mind getting along with you and whatever, that was a bit much," she said, embarrassed.
"...You're not making any sense," Kakuzu said roughly, irritation growing. "I still don't know where we stand."
Sakura let out a low growl.
"Look, it's just too much, okay. Keep your hands away from my thighs, ass, breasts, and anywhere that might be considered a 'grey' area," she snapped. "I didn't mind before, because you weren't trying to feel me up when you were hugging me."
"I wasn't trying to-" Kakuzu sat up angrily, and glared at her in the darkness. "What kind of a low class pervert do you take me for?"
"Well what were you doing?" she spat back, feeling a little afraid.
"I was-" he paused to calm down, and started again, much calmer. "I was trying to remind you of my promise. That I'd keep you safe... Most people are scared of Kisame, when they first meet him."
Sakura felt like an idiot.
He had been trying to comfort her, and she'd snapped at him, threatened him, and accused him of being a perv. No wonder he was pissy.
"I should have known you'd be different," he continued. "Most people are scared of me, as well."
Sakura stood up, still in her sleeping back, and shuffled over to Kakuzu, sitting down next to him on his bed.
"I'm sorry, Ragdoll," she whispered to him, leaning on his shoulder lightly. "I made an ass out of myself just now, didn't I?"
He hesitantly put his arm around her, keeping it loose around her shoulders.
"Most guys I've come across just go straight for the merchandise, you know?" she sighed. "I should have known you'd be different, too."
Kakuzu tightened his embrace, and rested his head against her own.
"I wont lie, Sakura. I want you," he told her quietly, frowning as she stiffened. "All of you, not just your body. I am a patient man, Sakura-chan. But I am also a very possessive one. I wont share you with Kisame, Hidan, or anyone."
'We're really in it now, Sakura-chan,' Inner Sakura groaned.
"I'm not a thing, Kakuzu, I'm a person," she moved, to look up into his eyes, which were almost glowing in the dark. "You can't 'have' me, like a possession. And not only would a relationship be extremely difficult since we're on opposite sides, but I doubt I'd be ready for anything like that anyway."
"A relationship would be difficult... but possible?" he quipped.
"No." she shot him down, pronouncing the full stop. "Not while you're an enemy. The same goes for everyone else. And even if we were allies, I don't know if it would work anyway."
"Why is that?" he asked, his voice sounding dangerous.
'Because I'm crazy? Because you're crazy? Because this entire situation is crazy??' she thought to herself.
"...Because... I don't know if I can love someone again," she admitted honestly. "I can get along with people, and be friends, but... I don't think I can bring myself to love like that again. I'm broken, Kakuzu. You don't want me."
Kakuzu felt all five of his hearts twinge.
"If you're broken, let me stitch you back together," he whispered, bringing his face within an inch of hers. "I told you, I can be patient."
Sakura shook her head lightly.
"Please, this is just too much for me," she begged. "We don't even know what your Leader will do with me. Can't we just... get along, no strings, and see what happens?"
"...You can actually say 'no strings' while looking at me?" Kakuzu tried for humour, even though he was feeling like the pits.
But it worked. Sakura giggled lightly.
"Fine," he sighed. "We can do it your way for now. Now get back in your own bed, I want some sleep."
Grinning at his scowl, she gave him a quick hug, and hopped her sleeping bag back over to her bed roll.
'Well, that was awkward!'
'I think I'm out of immediate danger,' Sakura sighed to herself quietly.
'Freakin' stupid nice Akatsuki. Bringing out our secrets,' Inner Sakura muttered.
'Shut up, I want sleep. We have to check out Uchiha and Zetsu tomorrow.'
'Today, it's past midnight.'
Sakura gave another mental groan, and drifted off to a light sleep.
--
Authors Notes:
Thanks for the reviews guys :)
I'll apologise in advance, I'm notoriously bad at updating, (and I have a major assignment due SOON) but I wrote this whole chapter just for you (and as an excuse to procrastinate) ;D
Seriously, if you have any ideas/requests I'll do my best to work them in. I have a vague Idea where this going, but my ideas usually bite me in the ass, and change completely.
Please tell me, who should Sakura end up with? Choices are: Kakuzu, Kisame, A non-Jashinist Hidan, or Zetsu (you'll meet him next chapter. Promise)
Thanks again!!