Dear Kate,

Not a looker. Yeah, yeah suuuure. That's laughable. You put Catherine Zeta Jones and Audrey Hepburn to shame. And that's saying alot. You are beautiful. Don't doubt that, Kate. Cause its true. Believe me, if we were in person I'd probably barely get two words out in front of you, the nerves you know. I desperately needed a cold shower after seeing it believe me. Is there any reason you don't think you're beauitufl? And yes, by that I mean a man with a name that starts with an S and ends in awyer.

But I'm glad you find me attractive. That was defiantly a stroke for my ego. I guess I don't think I'm attractive because of Sarah. She never wanted to sleep with me, not because she actually thought I was ugly because she just wasn't sexually attracted to me. She did sleep with me however, every once and a while. But as I said, when theirs passion and love, its so much better, so I guess our sex wasn't complete crap. It was okay cause we did love each other, but were weren't in love with each other. You know?

Anyways, since you got to mock or compliment my life style I get to do the same to you. But first, peas and cheese sauce it AMAZING. Face it, Kate. It tastes so good, and Harry Potter rocks also. I love those books, they are intense and captivating, just give them a try and you may just like them. But yeah, I am pretty damn cute.

Why do you like late, late night? Don't you need sleep? Maybe…someday…if the opportunity arises I mean, I could teach you to play golf…if you'd like that I mean…Anyways, yeah, Christmas is great, I suppose. It's so stressful though. Awww, sappy movies. Cute. As I said, Harry Potter rules. Lord of the rings…well…it…drools. Well, the movies were good but Harry Potter kicks off all its ass…all over the place. You seem to have very good taste in music. That's sexy. Cartoons?! Now THAT is for kids. But, I got to admit, kind of cute. Back to his place for a scary movie huh? Interesting…do I sense an...offer there? Alaska?! How odd.

Do you want me to woe you?

I hope these aren't embarrassing questions. Like…when was the last time I touched myself or something…not that I do that. Why do I always choose to write in pen?

Seriously attracted to his pen pal,

Jack

Kate giggled nervously as she read the letter. He thought she was beautiful? Not even Sawyer had called her that. Sexy, and hot, sometimes even a cute, but never beautiful. And… 'do you want me to woe you?'. Was that flirting? Or was it repulsion? No, he had thought she was beautiful, why on earth would he be repulsed? Suddenly the phone rang. Kate jumped up and answered it.

"Hello?" She asked.

"Kate…its Sawyer."

*

Jack climbed into bed and picked up his Harry Potter book, he began to read slowly, tired from a long, long day at work. Jack had just begun to drift off when the phone rang. Jack glanced at it, looking at the ID. He saw it wasn't the hospital and that was the only place or person who would be calling him, so he was about to ignore it when he noticed the area code. Kate's area code.

"Hello?" Jack breathed. He was surprised by how eager he was to hear her voice, to know she was okay.

"Jack." Kate murmured.

"Kate." Jack responded quietly. "Kate, what happened?" Her quietness panicked him for some reason.

"He called me."

"Who called you?" Jack asked, by before she could answer he realized. "Sawyer?" He asked, knowing he was right but wishing he was wrong. His wishes were dashed when Kate sobbed at his name. Jack immediately felt guilty and tried desperately to fix the situation. "Hey, hey, don't cry. We won't use his name, we won't okay? We'll call him…we'll call him…That Slut." Kate giggled slightly and Jack smiled. "What happened?" He asked cautiously.

"Saw- I mean…That Slut, he called me." Kate said quietly. Her voice sounded strained and Jack was sure she was doing her best not to cry. "And…he said…that…he's separating from his wife, again." She gasped and sobbed again.

"Oh my god…" Jack murmured.

"Sorry." Kate said quickly.

"No, no! Not about you. About That Slut." He paused. "Does he want to come back to you?" Jack asked quietly, his heart picked up speed, he didn't want Kate to go back to Sawyer…he…he didn't want to admit it to himself but he wanted Kate to go to him. Go to him, Jack.

"I don't want to." She murmured. "But…I have to."

Jack frowned. She had to? "Kate, did he threaten you? Did he bribe you? What did he do? You don't have to do anything for him, Kate. Tell me what he did and I'll help you anyway that I can. I'll call the police, Kate. I will keep him from hurting you again." Jack didn't care if he sounded defensive and protective, he cared, he didn't want her to go back to Sawyer, and he didn't want her to feel she had to.

"No…I have to because it is Sawyer." Kate murmured delicately. This statement made quite literally, no sense, to Jack. He started at the wall in front of him silently. "You're mad at me." Kate stated, sounding hurt. Jack sighed and was about to tell her that he wasn't when she interrupted him. "Look, before you say anything can I explain something to you?"

"Of course."

"Sawyer made me feel like I was the most special girl in the world, that I was a princess. He only had eyes for me, he would send flowers to my work randomly, and he'd buy me presents just because I was menstruating. I thought he was my prince charming. I was sure he was my prince charming. But…" Kate sighed. "I knew something was wrong, I knew something was wrong before he was even cheating on me with his ex-wife." Jack could hear the execrating pain in her voice when she said that. "He wouldn't tell me about his problems, like the relationship was all about making me feel happy. Which most girls would think that's a good thing, sometimes, but I loved him, I loved him so much and I wanted him to be so happy. The weird part was that he wouldn't ever let me talk about my problems, as if he couldn't be bothered to hear them. He would just want us to live this super happy, picket white fence family. Because, see, when Sawyer was little his step father beat him, and then killed his mom and himself." Kate paused when Jack hissed in a breath of disagreement. "I know!" Kate exclaimed. "It's unbelievable. But it made him want to make a happy place for his wife. I should have known!" She wailed loudly, catching Jack by surprise. "I should've known." There was another pause. "I should have known…someone who divorces the wife who he was determined to make things better for…is…bad news, to say the least. But he told me I was his soul mate, Jack. His soul mate. That is the most amazing thing I've ever been told. The next thing I noticed that although he sent me flowers, made me laugh and told me he loved me, more then his wife, he never complimented me. Never… 'you look nice,' or 'that dress that dress brings out the color in your eyes, which is a fantastic color by the way,' or 'my god, do you ever have a lovely face!'" Jack laughed at the slightly silly voice she used the last one and Kate giggled also. "Or...ahm… 'you're beautiful.'" There was a small pause.

"You are Kate, you are beautiful, and I promise you I'm not saying that to make you feel better." Jack said meaningfully.

There was still silence on Kate's end. Jack waited patiently for her to say something, nothing was said for a few minutes and Jack wondered if she was still there when she spoke again in a voice that broke Jacks heart.

She gasped for air and sobbed, moaned slightly and began gasping for air again in between what sounded like the most painful, core shaking sobs Jack had ever heard. Kate moaned slightly and choked and coughed gently, blowing her nose. Jack waited patiently again as she tried re-gain control of her self.

"And then…" Kate gasped. "That…that SLUT…cheated on me! He cheated on me! With his EX WIFE!" Kate screamed. "And now…now he wants me back because I'm his soul mate! And he makes me feel like I'm the best girl and world so I have to! I have to because he loves me and he'd kill for me!" Kate howled.

"KATE!" Jack yelled and Kate immediately stopped making any noise. Jack imaged her sitting on her bed, holding her breath to try and subside the tears, her chest heaving with each sob that couldn't escape. "Kate, you don't owe him anything. You are your own women. You can stand up for yourself, who do you want to be with?" Jack realized how that question sounded and quickly changed it around. "You can be with any man you want if you really try, and Sawyer doesn't deserve you, Kate. He should be down on his damn knees begging you to come back to him. If he can't see what a smart, charming, beautiful, funny, intelligent, determined, wonderful women you are then he really can't see…you."

Kate gave a loud sniff and small whimper. Then she began to cry again. "Jack." She mumbled through her gasp. "Jack." Jack didn't answer. "Jack?" She asked this time in a slightly calmer voice.

"I'm here." He told her quickly.

"Are you busy?" She asked. Jack laughed a little.

"Of course not, I was just reading Harry Potter." He explained. Kate laughed a little to. Jack wasn't sure, but he thought she might be debating something in her head so he decided to try and help her out. "I'm not going to leave you, Kate. Not until you are ready." Kate sighed quietly on the other end.

"Talk to me." She requested, her tears seemed to have stopped but she took in another shaky, heartbreaking gasp again. Jack thought for a moment.

"Okay." He whispered. "What about?"

"Anything. Just let it captivate me, let my mind wander somewhere else."

"What if you don't find it interesting, what if I bore you?"

Kate didn't answer right away. "I like your voice, I'll probably be entranced." She giggled nervously. Jack chuckled to.

"Thanks."

"So…go ahead. Just talk."

Jack thought for a moment and looked down at his book. He cleared his throat. "Chapter Ten, The Marauder's Map. Madame Pomfrey insisted on keeping Harry in the hospital wing for the rest of the weekend. He didn't argue or complain, but he wouldn't let her throw away the shattered remnant of his Nimbus Two Thousand…

Jack read Kate a full chapter of the third and his personal favorite Harry Potter book, The Prisoner of Azkaban. Once he was finished he asked Kate how she had liked it and she said it wasn't too bad, but now she wanted to talk to have a proper conversation with him.

"I know!" Kate declared, her and Jack both giggling. "Remember I was going to ask you all those questions? Why don't I just ask you now?"

"What will we talk about in the letter?" He asked. Kate rolled her eyes, even though Jack couldn't see.

"We'll think of something. Okay, now…What was the saddest day of your life?"

Jack answered immediately. "My dad's funeral, I cried for about four days straight. Not kidding."

"Jack, I'm so sorry." Kate said sincerely. "My saddest day must have been…the day I walked in on Sawyer and Cassidy."

"I'm so sorry to." Jack told her.

"What was the best compliment you ever received?"

"That I'm the most handsome man to ever walk the halls of St. Sebastian hospital." He told her. Kate burst out laughing. "Why is that funny?!" Jack blazed in mock anger.

"Who said that?" She was still laughing. Jack noticed she had a great laugh.

"Many, many women." Jack said cockily.

"All of them said exactly that?" She was laughing harder.

"Well…" Jack began.

"Did they all just grab you and throw you in the nearest storage closet and confess their love for your body?" She asked, her laughter subsiding.

"That only happened ONCE!" Jack cried defensively, making Kate burst into laughter again. "Okay, okay, what about you hilarious one?" He chuckled.

"Oh no, tell me this story!" Kate laughed.

"Fine…fine." Jack sighed. "There was this new nurse working in the spinal ward, and I guess she hadn't realized that I was married, because I never wore my ring to work, you know…and she called my office from hers and asked to meet me near the cafeteria, and I guess I wasn't on top of my game because I didn't bother to think why. So, I went there and just as I walking by, she was already hiding in the always unlocked storage closet, well she reached out and grabbed my tie, kinky enough right, and just pulled me in and against her and tried to get my pants down." Jack paused and heard Kate gasping again and was worried he had made her cry when he realized she was just laughing really hard. "I got her under control and then she explained she's in love me, obviously, and then I told her I'm married." Jack said lamely. Kate gasped again. "It isn't funny, Kate."

"Oh yes, yes it is. It is really funny, but at the same time I feel slightly protective over you." Once that came out Kate quickly sobered up. "I mean…"

"It is fine, Kate. I know what you mean…" He smiled and he had a funny feeling she was smiling to. "So, what is the best compliment you've ever gotten?"

"I think you know." She murmured. She was thinking about when he called her beautiful.

"Yeah, I do."

"Now," Kate said briskly. "What is your worst fear? Mine is being buried alive."

"Really!" Jack laughed. "Mine to!"

"No way!" Kate laughed as well. "What a co-winky dink! It's a creepy thought isn't it?"

"Oh, yeah, defiantly, I have tons of nightmares all the time about being buried alive. I always imagine my patient's families doing it, even if I saved the person."

"You love your job don't you?" Kate asked quickly.

"Yeah," Jack agreed. "Yeah, I do."

"How come?" She asked.

"I love science…and being able to go to someone and say I saved your person. I saved your wife, I saved your daughter or your boyfriend or your parent. Their gunna be okay, they're gunna go home with you." Jacks voice was full of emotion and his eyes burned slightly with tears. "And then seeing the patient, and saying that they are going to walk out of the hospital, or they are fine, they are gunna be okay…it's the best feeling in the world…" He paused. "but it's the worst feeling, not saving them, not being able to make their face light up and start crying happy tears and hugging people they love. Instead…just seeing them sit there in shock and sometimes getting angry, or going into denial, it just…it makes me wish that I could switch places with them and take away their pain. Even though I've never seen these people before, or met them and never will again. I can't even imagine how much it would hurt."

"I think you do know how much it hurts, just in different ways." Kate thought for a moment. "You are really good guy, Jack. A really great man."

"Thank you."

"It's true." Kate paused for a minute. "Next question, if you could change one thing about the world, what would it be and why?"

"You go first."

"Okay…" Kate said slowly. "I guess I'd want to get rid of global warming. I don't see why we should work tirelessly to change a world we might not even have in 10 years because we can't take care of it."

"That makes sense."

"I know."

They both laughed again. "I think I'd want to change the way the media works." Jack said in a shy voice. "I know I should probably say something like getting rid of aids or ending poverty, but I hate the way the media portrays everything. Guys shouldn't have to feel like they need to be big macho men, and girls shouldn't need to be flawless and stick thin. Everyone is beautiful. Sure, maybe for some people like you and me it's easier to see, but…" Jack joked. Kate laughed at this. "But…" he continued, chucking as well. "I don't want my kids growing up in a world like that."

"How many kids do you want?" Kate asked.

"Two to four, what about you?"

"Two to five." She laughed. Jack grinned.

They must have talked for hours, because before Jack knew what was happening his alarm clocked went off and he swore loudly, making Kate burst out laughing, Jack laughing as well.

"God, its 6:00 am."

"Good thing it's Saturday. Wait, why do you have an alarm on the weekend? Oh god, you don't have to work today do you?!"

"No," Jack laughed. "No, I'm off."

"Oh good. I was worried I kept you up, yapping to keep my mind off…him." Kate murmured. "It doesn't hurt too much anymore."

"That's good. You'll get through this." Jack paused. "I believe in you, Kate."

She didn't answer right away. "I had better get some sleep. Bye, Jack."

"Bye, Kate."

"Thanks."

"No, thank you."

*

"Hello?" Jack answered his phone around 12:00 after six hours of sleep.

"Hey, want to go out for lunch?" His best friend, Hurley, asked.

"I'm having lunch with my supervisor, a check up." He paused. "But you can come if you want."

"Sweet."

"I'll pick you up in thirty."

"Twenty."

"Fine."

*

"She just sounded so sad." Jack explained to Hurley and Lance over lunch. "So, just…so heart breaking-ly sad. I've never heard anything like it before. She didn't even need to cry, just the tone of her voice, it told me…I guess…that she's shattered. She's shattered." Jack said into his soup. There was quite at the table. "And she called me. She called me when she was shattered." He paused. "I hate him for…shattering….her."

"Dude." Hurley said.

"Yeah, dude." Lance agreed. Jack looked up, Hurley was grinning and Lance was looked like someone had told him his wife died.

"What?" He asked.

"You really, really like her!" Hurley laughed. "You have a major crush on a girl you've never even met!" Jack frowned at him. "Come on, dude, you were singing Head Over Feet by Alanis Morrisette at the top of your lungs on the way here."

"You were?" Lance asked, perking up. Jack gave him a confused look for a moment and turned back to Hurley, who was sat next to Lance in the booth.

"I…I like that song!" Jack defended himself. "Alanis has a wonderful voice!" He looked back at Lance who was practically glowing. "What's up with you!?" Jack snapped.

"So, you don't like her?"

"No!" Said Jack and then he gasped. He stopped and started at Hurley and Lance. "Well…holy cow." He mumbled running his hand through his hair. "I think I have a crush on her…" Jack trailed off looking into his soup, scared but happy at the same time. "Oh my god, I like her…I don't…I don't love her, but I do…I like her a lot." Jack glanced up at the two men sat across the table and started at them. "Wow…So, do I tell her?"

"Well, do you think she would like to know?" Lance asked.

"I'm not sure if she likes me though…I mean, I suppose we've been flirting a little bit…" Jack wiggled uncomfortably in his seat. "But…I…just…it might all be mindless, what if she doesn't like me and it's just pity flirt because I'm the poor depressed doctor?"

"Would she do that?" Hurley asked. Jack shook his head immediately, smiling gently. "And…Dude, are you even depressed anymore?"