Jack felt a little bit high. Since his talk with Kate with his mood had gone up considerably. Amazingly really. Jack left the hospital almost dancing, he sashayed by the reception flinging his arms out, briefcase swinging. He didn't notice all the secretaries stop what they were doing to stare at him spin and give a leap as he jumped out the automatic doors. It was totally out of character for Jack to act like this. But then again, it was totally out of character for Jack to have major feelings for a women he never even met. He might as well go with the flow.

Jack saw his car and leapt inside, tossing his briefcase into the passenger seat. He reached for the radio as he pulled out, the speakers automatically playing his favorite station. He heard Smashmouths 'Believer' playing quietly. Jack pulled his car to the exit and blasted the music loudly. "Badbaba!" Jack sang along, tossing his head back onto the head rest. He turned the corner and drummed his hands along with the rhythm. "I thought love was. Only true in fairy tales. Meant for someone else," Jack's voice cracked considerably here. "not for me." He didn't really care. "Love was out to get to me. That's the way it seems. Disappointment haunted," His voice then deepened along with the music. "All my dreams." He stopped at the light and let his shoulders and neck giggle with the music. "AND THEN I SAW HER FACE!" Jack yelled. "Now I'm a believer. Not a trace. Of doubt in my mind. I'm in love. I'm a believer. I couldn't leave her. If I tried!" Jack continued to sing along with the music as he neared his house, and at the last light he looked over and saw a old women looking up at him, looking utterly terrified at his somewhat lousy dancing and attempt at air guitar and drums in the car. Jack simply started at her and sang. "Now I'm a believer, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, YEAH, YEAH!" Jack roared as he floored it out of the intersection.

*

When he got home, Jacks high had fallen substantially. He was still happy, but he had used all his energy in making someone what of an idiot of himself. He spent the night formulating a response to Kate.

Dear Kate,

As stated before, I will NOT tell you how often I touch myself! Don't be ridiculous! That is such a weird request. Not to mention humiliating to me. And EXCUSE ME? How on earth would you know if I am heaven in bed or not? That is not fair! And comparing me to a hamburger! If chocolate is good sex then…I am like…like…I am the god damn chocolate factory! I could be like…the sex guru if I really wanted to.

Yes, thanks for that offer Kate. I'll keep that mind. The next time I have a bad dream I'll be sure to jump in bed with you. That sounds perfect. Haha.

Am I depressed? I don't even know anymore. I think I am. Sometimes I feel like I'm not, like my whole life makes sense again, that I have a purpose, something to live for. And then other times…other times it feels like I've been thrown into reverse, and I'm a teenager again, only not nearly as fun. Nothing makes sense, and everything is gloom and doom. Everything is a catastrophe, from burning the toast, to loosing someone at work. It messes me up. I hate it. I really…I really just wish it would make up its mind, instead of sitting on the fence all the time. It makes me…well…not to sound to sensitive or anything, but it makes me cry. It just, I hate it when my emotions are toyed with. Its cruller. But it is so much worse when it is myself toying with my own emotions, with hardly any control. It is like I have two brains, the one that wants me happy, and the one that wants me sad. I feel a tad bi-polar. Maybe cause I'm sitting on the fence…it means I'm getting better? Oh, and then to top things off, Lance, being in love with me? This is just plain awkward. But we talked about it, I think I'm over it, but it is a quite bit strange. I've never even…I mean…me? Gay? No. Not a chance. Thank god for that to. Having to deal with sexuality issues combined with my own depression is really not something I want ha-ha.

What do you think, your opinion is really important to me.

Curiously,

Jack Shephard.