Thanks for the reviews/views =) Hope you had a great turkey day if you had it this weekend. : ) (I know we do in Canada, no clue if they do anywhere else in the world x3 I should go Google that!)

I just wanted to say before I start the next chapter that no one should really be taking this story 'seriously', I mean in the way the story is written and how the characters act, all I'm doing is having fun. This is purely a 'crack-fic' I know that there is no way in the world Horatio would do any of the crap he does in this story! But his personality is supposed to be like that, just for a fun turn on things. I will most likely change that in future fictions but for now, he is, well a dumbass. :)

Frank sighed as he sat on the lawn chair, glancing every once and a while at the pool. It brought back memories for him. Memories he wished could be forgotten.

Alexx looked over at Frank and rose from her seat. She placed a soft hand on his arm and smiled. "Hey there honey, what's the matter?"

Frank blinked and gazed up at the woman. "Nothing." He responded quietly.

"Hun, don't give me that. I can easily tell by the way you are acting that something is up. So spill."

Frank chuckled softly as Alexx sat down beside him. "Memories." He stated in little more than a whisper.

"Memories? Well do you have anything else for me to go off of?" She chuckled softly.

"I hate water, it brings me back to a time when I was younger."

Alexx nodded as she listened.

"It feels like it was yesterday, I was with him and we were happy. I remember sitting there and watching him swim. I knew I shouldn't of-"Frank then choked up. "But...I did, I grabbed his small little tail and pulled him backwards through the water. I remember laughing and letting go, but then he sunk to the bottom. I thought he was playing a game so I waited for him. But-"he took a large quivering breath. "When I went and got him, he-he-he was dead..." Tears trickled down his eyes as Alexx wisped them away. "I-I m-i-ss hi-m s-so m-mu-mu-ch." Frank sobbed pitifully.

"Oh sugar," Alexx soothed. "Who was he?"

"Swimmy."

Alexx blinked, thinking she misheard. "Swimmy?"

"Yes! Swimmy, my wonderful Swimmy! He was the best fish you would have ever met!" Frank sobbed into the napkin Alexx had given him.

"Your, crying about a fish?" Alexx responded in disbelief.

"Yes. I miss swimmy so much, b-but Swimmy don't swim no more."

Natalia blinked from where he was. "Are you sure your mentally stable?" She asked Frank.

Frank glanced up as Alexx walked away. "Yes I am." He snapped.

Alexx sat down next to Natalia and smirked, leaning over. "We're still waiting for the test results to come in." She smirked.

Natalia grabbed onto her stomach as she fell into a fit of laughter, Alexx hot on her heels behind her.

"I'm telling you, this is the best idea ever!" Eric grinned

Ryan nodded encouragingly. "It's gotta' work!" he announced.

"Okay, so to get Yelina to Horatio, Horatio away to Calleigh and Calleigh to me, we-" Eric was cut off as he was hit in the back of the head with a beach ball. Turning around slowly and mincingly. he saw a smiling Horatio, a giggling Calleigh and...well to put it bluntly a Yelina who was checking out Horatio.

"Who did that?" Eric snapped, though his 'snappiness' was only directed towards Horatio.

Calleigh and Horatio blinked before quickly pointing at each other. "(S)HE DID IT!" they both exclaimed as if they were four.

Rolling his eyes Eric strolled over to Calleigh, Yelina and Horatio. Ryan dawdled along behind him. "Listen Caine, you should lay off before you get hurt." He growled, poking a slender finger into the redhead's chest.

"Oh but kind Eric, dear. I did nothing." Horatio smiled softly.

"Awkward on many levels H." Ryan replied as his eye twitched softly.

Calleigh rolled her eyes. "If you must know Eric," She paused and thought about telling the truth but her inner 'evil' got the best of her. "Yelina did it." She smiled softly.

"What!?" Yelina screeched, turning to Calleigh, who was smiling away.

Eric froze and growled. "So, why exactly did you throw a ball at my head?"He snapped he was about to give Yelina a tongue-lashing, but was thrown into the pool by Horatio, which caused Yelina to giggle and give Horatio a hug, which caused Horatio to blush and Calleigh to scowl.

Ryan yawned and walked away. He sighed as he went over to the bag he brought filled with many different assortments of water toys and grabbed a water gun. He walked over to Eric and smiled as he helped the other man out of the pool. Turning, he 'waddled' over to Horatio, Calleigh and Yelina and smiled as he pointed the water gun at one of them. All froze and waited for what was about to happen.

Ryan smiled and shot Yelina square in the face, sending her backwards into the pool.

"Shoop da Whoop." Ryan grinned before turning right into a large hug from Calleigh.

"Oh my lord Ryan! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH RIGHT NOW!" The blonde beauty squealed as she held the man. Ryan chuckled as he released the hold. "No problem, she was bothering me anyways."

Eric stood dripping beside a dry Horatio. "Did Calleigh just hug him?" he snapped to the LT.

"Eric, Eric I believe she just did." He responded simply.

"Well we can't have that, now can we?" Eric smirked.

"No, no we can not." Horatio stated, sliding his glasses on his face.

Calleigh turned and smiled at Horatio and Eric. "Time for lunch." She drawled before walking back up to the deck with Ryan.

"Hotdog or Hamburger, Handsome?"

Horatio pondered the thought before smiling. "Calleigh, Calleigh I would like a hamburger."

"OH FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD WOULD YOU STOP!?" Natalia screamed, clenching her head, causing everyone to jump and turn to her.

"What?" Horatio asked blinking and tilting his head softly.

"Must you repeat the first word in every sentence!?" The brunette snapped.

Horatio blinked. "Yes, yes I must." He smirked in response.

"Cheeky asshole...."Natalia muttered under her breath.

Alexx smirked and looked over to Natalia. "It seems we have another test result to wait for." She giggled.

Calleigh turned to the other women. "What tests?"

Alexx smirked. "Honey, we are waiting for the tests to come in to tell us if Horatio and Frank are mentally sane."

Calleigh broke out laughing and turned to look at the men. "That's what you get when you are old, wear sunscreen and are going bald."

Frank froze, his hot-dog half way to his mouth. "You think I'm going bald?" he replied.

Horatio smirked. "Sweetheart if I'm old, you're calling Alexx ancient."

Calleigh rolled her eyes before glancing around. "Where are Eric and Ryan?"

"Waddle duck what the heck was that!?" Eric yelled at Ryan.

"Um, Calleigh giving me a hug?" Ryan replied honestly.

"Well we were supposed to get Yelina with Caine and Cal with me, but I think you just messed up that plan. Just what exactly are your intentions Waddle duck?"

"I-I'm just here to make you end up with Calleigh, McHotty, Sir...Sir?" Ryan exclaimed.

"Well now we are gonna have to think of a new plan now that all of this has happened."

"And what exactly to you think we should do?"

Eric paused but then grinned. "War on Caine."

....

....

"You've said that already." Ryan replied bluntly.

"I have?" Eric blinked.

"No duh." Ryan snapped. "What I think we need to do is embarrass Horatio in front of Cal."

Eric nodded, "But what to do." He sighed.

"We could always pants him." Ryan grinned.

"THAT'S PERFECT!" Eric giggled, which caused Ryan to freeze.

"Wrong on 12 levels, with a bonus 3." Ryan muttered.

"Whatever let's go." Eric muttered, turning to leave.

"Wait! How exactly are we gonna be able to get even close enough to pull his pants down?"

"We could seduce him?"

Ryan froze. "Fine but your doing the seducing."

"How the fuck did I end up the seducer?" Ryan muttered quietly as he walked over to Horatio. Sighing he nodded. Here goes nothing.

"Oh, Hey there H." Ryan smiled in a high pitched tone.

"Sugar is your voice okay?"

"Oh, yes thanks Alexx." He grinned as he dropped his watch in front of the Lt. "Oh, whoops! I seemed to have dropped my watch." He smiled as he bent over in front of Horatio, giving him a... 'nice' view of his derriere. Horatio healed his breath as he watched Ryan stroke his own leg as he straightened up.

Calleigh, Natalia and Alexx couldn't hold in there laughter as all three of them fell off their chairs laughing hard. "R-R-Y-AN...W-Wha-t-t t-he-e fu-ck!?" Natalia rasped as she healed her stomach.

Calleigh was rolling on the floor, holding her stomach while the other two were trying hard to get up.

Horatio has his hand over his mouth as he watched Ryan walk off. 'What the heck was that?!' his mind screamed. 'D-Di-d I just get seduced?!....BY RYAN NO LESS!?'

Yelina crossed her arms as she stalked away from everybody, she wanted to leave but that would be like forfeiting to that stupid blonde, which she would NOT do.

She turned the corner and ran into Eric and Ryan arguing. "WHERE WERE YOU!?" Ryan yelled.

"I was waiting for the signal."

" What freaking signal!? We never arranged for a signal!"

"Well we should have."

"No freaking duh."

"Gentlemen, if you don't mind me butting in, I may be of assistance." Yelina smiled.

Both men turned and scowled. "Why would we want your help?" Eric snapped.

"Because your version of 'seducing Horatio' was pathetic."

"True, true." Eric replied.

"So all we have to do to separate is make it so Calleigh can't keep her hands off of you Eric."

Both men rolled their eyes as the three adults huddled. "Let's get this started." Ryan grinned.

Calleigh smiled as she stood in her kitchen with Horatio. "Finally." She mumbled to him as Horatio pinned her against the counter. His hands on either side of her body.

"Finally." He whispered back, he lowered his face to hers and quickly captured her soft lips with this own velvety ones. Calleigh quickly deepened the kiss, moving her arms around his neck. They stayed like that until the need of oxygen became too much and they broke apart. Horatio smiled as he leaned his forehead onto hers.

"Is this okay?" Calleigh whispered.

Horatio smiled and nodded softly.

"Then why does it feel like we are going behind everyone's backs?"

"Because we are at this point." Horatio chuckled softly.

Calleigh rolled her eyes at the man trapping her. "What about Stetler?"

"Have I ever cared?"

"Alexx?"

"Will be overly happy."

"Eric?"

"I want to rub his face in it." Horatio replied smugly.

"Yelina and Ray Jr.?"

Horatio froze, he forgot about his sister-in-law and nephew.

"Ray will be happy, but Yelina...."

"Will want to kill me I take it?" Calleigh smirked at Horatio, who chuckled and nodded. "No offence though, Cal." He smirked in response.

"Okay, but you can't give her any ideas okay?" She smirked.

"As long as you keep your hands off of Eric." He chuckled.

"Oh, because I have such a hard time now, eh handsome?" Calleigh smirked as she smacked his arm lightly. "Well, let's get back out there."

"After this." Horatio smirked as he captured the blonde's lips again. He moulded them together for as long as he could before separating and kissing her forehead. "Let's get going sweetheart."

Calleigh just nodded in a daze as she followed Horatio out of her house and back outside to where Eric was lying near the poolside. She smiled and waved softly at him but was stopped when she heard her name called. "Cal, mind giving me a hand?!" the Cuban called.

"I guess...."Calleigh sighed, padding over to the man. "What can I do you for?" she sassed, sitting down beside him.

"Mind helping me put some sunscreen on?" He asked innocently with his big brown eyes.

Calleigh sighed with a smirk. "Oh I guess." She drawled, pouring some sunscreen, which was to her left onto her hands. After lathering up her hands she was about to put it on his back, but he shot up and embraced Calleigh in a tight hug. Her hands gripped his hips, stabilizing herself.

"I'm sorry for being such and ass at times!" Eric exclaimed as he let go with a huge smile.

"Um...it's okay?" Calleigh replied as she went to get up.

The southern belle froze and glanced up at Eric.

"What in the world did you do?"

What in the world DID Eric do?

Sorry for updating so late! :( Oh the joys of un-expected power outages, at least it came back on soon enough for me to watch Miami (which is where I just came from xD)

Has anyone else noticed that Ryan's choice of...style, has changed a bit? What's with the sweater-vests and slicked back hair? Not cool waddle duck! :O

Next Update: Tuesday 20th at the earliest, I got a couple of things to do this week, so it may take a little while to update. :)

Oh! PS: (I love you x3) Please vote on the poll on my profile for if I should continue or not, I'm not quite sure since it seems to get more views in earlier chapters, but then thins out so I don't think to many people are liking it :) Thanks!

Oh and Shoop Da Whoop - I know there was no cartoon eyes etc. ;) But I couldn't help it